Merry (or sad?) Christmas is Around the Corner!

What in the world has me being such a cry baby? All the Christmas movies (kids shows included!) seem to be bringing a tear to my eyes this year. I know that part of it is James being away from home this Christmas, but on the other hand it is AC's first Christmas and should be extra joyful for me. Don't get me wrong, so far I am really enjoying this "Holiday" season since James was home for Thanksgiving (which was great!) and got to do most of the Christmas shopping with me. But this last week has been kinda bitter sweet for me. When one thing makes me happy, another is right there to make me sad.

The kiddos have caught some cold something they are having a time shaking. AC has pretty much been sick since November 12th. Up until that point, she really hadn't had any contagious bugs that she couldn't shake. I hate her being sick! She was well for about a week and then her head cold seemed to start back up again, although now I am not totally convinced it isn't from her teething. KL now is all stoppy which may mean that AC's first cold has caught up to her. Maybe they won't pass this back and forth amongst themselves and let's also hope Mommy doesn't get it.

James headed out last night. Usually I handle him leaving pretty well. On a normal day for goodbyes, KL is in school and we are super busy running around, but that has changed. Company rules now say that he has to have his own transportation to the office which means no more rental cars. No more headache of trying to get to an airport somewhere, get the car, and make it back home all during the hours KL is in school. Guess it also means no more semi-private goodbyes at the airport for me and James. Also, no more 2 hour drive home alone to psych myself up for the 4 weeks alone without him telling myself I can do it and immediately having to rush back alone before school is out.

Last night, James was packing up his truck and I went outside to meet him. He just held me for several minutes and I cried. I have never before let him see me cry when he is leaving because I feel it makes it harder on him and there is always strangers about in the airport. In fact, even once I am back in the car, I will only allow myself to shed a couple tears while telling myself that its just life so deal. Last night was totally different. When we came back inside, it was time for him to tell the kids bye. I had a very hard time not crying again. I knew if I cried and they saw me, James would be leaving with all three of us crying and that would make it almost impossible for him to walk out the door. KL is very emotional upon his leaving herself and most times after he is gone, or when I get her from school and she realizes he was for real when he told her goodbye that morning, she cries just a little. Luckily last night she held it together since I didn't.

So, is it all just knowing the stress of Christmas is upon me? That I still have some shopping to do and not sure when and how that is going to happen? That James isn't going to be here? Or are my hormones really still that off balance? Probably a good mixture of all the above, but starting today I am determined to pull it all together!

My newest most used word...

Well, looks like I have a new word that I say no less than 50 billion times a day.... NO, NO!





And it is always for the SAME thing....











See the toys? She acts like she is just moving over to play. Then the toys are dropped and she heads for the tree fast as lightening.



Then Mommy says "No, No!"



And we give Mommy a special gift to make it all better...

Who can get mad at that face?

By the way... notice I learned how to add pics :) Wasn't hard at all!

Sweetheart Bat, Flower, Ears, Teeth and Foot

What a weekend! Well, let's back up... what a week!

James packed up and left last Tuesday. Lucky for me, he hung around long enough to put the kiddos to bed. Usually he leaves mid afternoon and the rest of the night is chaos. It was so much easier on me and the kids to have him here until bedtime.

Wednesday was a great day. We went to our Wednesday night church only to find out they were doing a community wide Halloween festival. I guess my kiddos were the only one's not in costume, but we were going for church and not a party. Either way, KL had a blast! We got home later than normal, but that was fine too.

Thursday was a busy day for KL. She had her honor's assembly at school. Meme and Pap showed up and we all surprised her by being there. She was so proud of getting an award. We were very proud of her for doing so well! At noon, they had the SAR (conduct) field trip. Only the students who have very good conduct for the 9 weeks were able to attend. They went bowling at the local bowling alley. Me and AC met KL there to watch the fun. All the kiddos had a great time.


I met her back at the school and signed her out early for the day. I figured that after the assembly and then a bowling trip, they really wouldn't be doing anything productive for the last hour of the day. We headed to Meme and Pap's house. They were planning on being out of town for the weekend and wanted the girls to come Trick or Treating because Meme didn't think she would live if she didn't see them in their costumes. It was a fun night with me, Mom, and Dad all cooking supper together and spending time with the girls.

As many of you know, storms passed close to their house that night. Luckily, the bad storms were about 10-30 miles away, but we still had the lightening and heavy rains. I was packing up our stuff in the car when I was blinded by a VERY bright light. All I had time to think was "What?" when the BOOM sounded in my ear. I realized very quickly that lightening had struck and way too close for comfort for me! KL came out on the porch saying "Momma, are you ok?" My knees were still weak and I just said "I think so." as I hurried back inside. Dad asked me where it struck because in the house, they saw the flash and heard the boom at the same time. I told him that I wasn't sure because it was too close to me and I didn't hang around long enough to look for the striking point. Come to find out, it had struck my aunt's house or right outside her house which I would guess to be about 100 yards from where I was. It knocked out her phones and stove. I was scared to death while I was loading the girls up in the car!

Friday was KL's Halloween party at school. AC and I were back up there for like the 4th time this week. I hate exposing her again to all those germs, but I didn't want to miss out on KL's fun either. She had a blast at the party. We were able to leave as soon as the party was over for another short day. They dismissed school at 1:30 due to all the rains. This was their 2nd day this year to close early just because of rain. When I was growing up, we were never that lucky! There had to be LOTS of snow and ice for us to miss a day and now they miss for rain??? We have gotten a whole lot lately, so I do understand the need to get the kids home safely with flood waters brewing up. I was happy to have my girl home with me early again that day.

Friday night, KL started running a little fever. At first, I was concerned because I wasn't thinking about what the cause could be. I was just thinking GREAT! Here we go. She is sick and I had AC at the school all week and now we are all going to be sick! Duh... she had gotten her flu shot so of course she was running a mild fever. Yes, Mommy over-reacted this time! It was Saturday evening before my mom reminded me that it was normal for a small fever after the shot.

Saturday, we headed to Mom and Dad's while they were out of town. We changed into their costumes and did some Trick or Treating with family and then headed to our church for the Halloween carnival. They had so much fun again! I have to say, I sure had the sweetest little Sweetheart Bat and Flower that I know. Not that I am partial or anything...

Sunday was church day. Just after morning services, KL told me that the back of her earring was INSIDE her ear. Impossible, I tell her and look at her ear. I explained that she has lost the back. She said look again. It's inside, Mom! I looked again, and sure enough. The back to her earring had gone inside her earring hole in the back of her ear. We had a quick lunch with some family at Mazzio's and then headed to the ER where the super nice Dr. removed it from her ear.

We got out of the ER just in time to head to the church for choir practice. Not long into the practice, KL comes and tells me that some of the boys were throwing darts and said they were going to throw them at the girls. They ran, KL tripped and skinned her foot (right foot). As we were finishing choir practice, KL returns again and says that her left foot was hurting. She is my little drama queen and if there are no tears and blood, I just give her a hug, tell her she will be ok, and she will hobble off only to forget about it as she continues her playing. After church, she was still hobbling and said her foot still hurt. I continued to tell her that she had a long day and was tired. She would be fine. We left church and both her and AC were grouchy! It had been a very long weekend. I decided that it was time to just load up and go home.

As we were coming thru town, KL started crying hard. She said that her foot hurt and she was starving. So, I told her that we were headed to Sonic on our way out and I was going to get her some supper to eat on the way home. I called my Dad (this was like the millionth phone call to Meme and Pap on their Anniversary weekend trip saying that something was wrong with KL). Dad said it may be a cramp and to pull over and try to massage her foot. This gave her a little extra attention and she stopped crying hysterically. We ate and continued home.

She fell asleep on the way and when we got home and she got out of the car, she was crying hysterically again. It hurt! So I carried her in, massaged again, and gave her some ibuprofen. I just wasn't into going back to the ER again the same day (even tho a different ER) for a different problem. I mean come on... can we say DHS? LOL! I also really didn't want to have to call James and tell him that his child had hurt herself and we were going to the ER... again! But, most importantly, after she had a foot massage, an ice pack, and some pain meds, she was fine. She was even able to walk to her room on her own and climb up on her bunk bed alone. If she would have continued in pain, we would have gone. I don't want to make it sound like I was being neglectful (another reason to call DHS LOL!), but my child is a drama queen! If she was fine to play hard at church and not able to tell me what she was doing when her foot started hurting ,she must not have hurt it bad right? I mean if you are doing nothing at all and all of a sudden your foot hurts, it can't be hurt bad since you were doing nothing at all...

Monday morning... school day... tired girl. Her foot was still hurting and she didn't think she could make it to school. Fine, we will go to the doctor. We were waiting in the doctor's office and she needed to switch chairs. She started hopping to the next chair... on her hurt foot. I gave her the stern mommy face and said KL you just jumped up and down on the foot you couldn't even walk on 5 minutes ago! She gave me the "I just got caught with my hand in the cookie jar" face... you mom's know the look! Then she says "I was wondering why it was hurting." Then I pop off... "If your foot isn't broke, I am gonna break it for you." Whew, DHS's phone must really be ringing now!

We do x-rays, talk to the dr and I hear the dreaded words... That is a common place for people to hurt their foots and the xrays show a small fracture in that bone. Mommy eats crow for lunch and KL gets whatever she wants.

We proceed to the dentist office for her scheduled appointment with Mommy looking and feeling like crap. She went in ahead of me while I unloaded AC. When I went in, she is telling the dentist's wife all about her weekend. She looked at me all sympathetic and said "you actually came here? If it was me, I would have called and said we aren't coming! And Dr. and I both would have understood." I just laughed and said what's one more bill? We were already out. Praise the Lord, she got a very good checkup at the dentist and had no cavities :)

Then on to get the "boot". As the physical therapist is placing this walking boot on her foot, she asks him "Can I ride my bike when I get home?" That is her only problem now. She is very unhappy she can't ride her bike and jump on the trampoline.

After all this within 5 days, I can't see why everyone isn't jealous of my life!

Big Kid Brag Time!

I feel that most of my postings are just bragging on my baby and that I don't talk about KL enough. Please don't misinterpret this! KL keeps me very busy and has loads of accomplishments of her own. It is just with the pregnancy and then a new baby (that seems to grow so fast too quick), I find myself talking about her more because I missed so much of this with KL (due to having a full time job outside the house) and I don't want the same thing to happen with AC.

KL is doing so well in school this year and I give all props to her teacher! She is awesome! KL had 3 A's and 1 B for this 9 weeks (and that was an 89... so close!). The B was in one of her weakest areas but hopefully we will have it turned around by the end of this next 9 weeks high enough for her to have an A average for the semester. KL has always has problems with her grades and it has been something that I never understood. I naturally had good grades so I just don't understand her grades being lower in the past. This year, we are making a harder effort to study extra hard at night when she gets home. I really don't like this and have not done it as much in the past because I feel they are in school for over 1/2 their day. Our time at home should be for fun and just being a kid. Studying at such a young age is just for the birds. This year, I was really concerned that she may start to fall behind in some areas if we didn't devote a little bit more time in the evenings for studying. So far, so good. The little bit of extra help is going a long way.

Since school started, she has learned to ride her bike. I just can't remember if I have posted on this yet or not, but she is doing great! She is riding like a pro! We had the hardest time building her confidence and telling her over and over that she COULD do it. James tried to "teach" her a little too young to do it alone. She wasn't just wasn't ready. Without the horrible details, that lesson ended in her running into a tree. This left her spirit broken as far as the bike was concerned. We couldn't even make her try again for several years. At the beginning of school, they asked if we would allow our kids to learn "bicycle safety" during PE. I said YES! I told her several times those first couple of weeks that she COULD do it and needed to try really hard to learn to ride her bike so that she wasn't embarrassed at school if she couldn't ride it. Finally one day, a couple of her friends rode over on their bikes and she felt left out a little. They told her she could do it too and before you know it as I was quietly standing in the shadows watching her try, she allowed them to "coach" her through it. They would tell her the same things me and James told her like "go faster", "lean if you think you are about to fall", and stuff like that. All of a sudden, she just took off like a flash! Now she just loves it so much that I have to make her get off and come inside. She concentrates more on her homework so that she can get done faster because her bike is waiting! I love it!

I did do something that James didn't agree with since school started. I noticed the same lack of attention and horrible hand writing continuing this year. I knew that I didn't want to have a repeat of her MES years at MIS so against my hubby's wishes, I set an appointment to have her checked for ADD. The results... they say she has ADHD. Apparently, children can still have ADHD without the behavior problems that most children see. I, personally, think now that we don't have those behavior problems because we have been so strict with her for all these years about behaving correctly. They pointed out that during the "interview" with me, she moved around in her chair some and got up "several" times to look at things on the bookshelf, desk, etc. Without realizing it, I would subtly redirect her attention back to where she needed to be. I guess I have done things like that for so long, I don't even realize it. When she "wanders", I start talking in her direction and asking her simple questions etc to kinda bring her back to the conversation at hand. Anyway, long story short we now have another appointment next week for her to see a different doctor that specializes more with ADHD children. Again, against James's wishes, we will start medication at that time. I have been praying a lot that we get the right medicine and dosage quickly so that this will be an easy thing for her. I also pray that this will help with her school work also. I know she is a very smart little cookie even though her grades sometimes don't reflect what she is capable of.

She is still in Girl Scouts and since she only had one meeting with the previous troop, we are going to change to another. One of her friend's Mom is starting a new troop which will have more kids that she knows and I have signed up to help. I think it will be good :) I am excited about it! Our first meeting, I believe, will be next week.

Cheer leading has gone good this "season". Their last game will be this Saturday. She has done so well. They are starting a new "Upward" basketball/cheer leading program here for this winter, and I am going to give her the option to continue.

We have been attending church here locally in Monticello again since school started back. She is always so happy to be involved in church both at "our" church where we are on Sunday's and also here on Wednesday nights. The drive is just too much for us to go "home" on Wednesday's with it being a school night. She has only missed one Wednesday night service since they started back up after the summer and she was totally upset that we couldn't make it. I can't say enough how thankful I am that she loves church so much!

We did miss Sunday morning services this week and it was so NOT intentional! This really should be a post of it's own, but I will add it here since it highly involved KL, her Daddy, and me. KL has been wanting to go hunting with her dad while he has been home. With all that has been going on, they decided that Sunday morning would be the best time to go. They left early and as planned were out of the deer woods in plenty of time to get ready for Sunday School and church. On the way out, Dad's Mule (that they borrowed) broke down on them. No problem, leave it and walk out, I would pick them up and still have plenty of time. I could just picture my baby girl cold, wet, and hungry walking out of the woods so I wanted to get my car as close as possible to get her. I drove a little too far "off the beaten path" and ended up stuck behind my grandmother's house. No problem. My uncle was just going to pull us out and we would be on our way to church. Then he got stuck right behind us. Great! 3 "rides" stuck all before 9 AM. Mom and Dad were at this point about to run late because they had little AC unexpectedly for about an hour. They had enough time to leave her with us and head on to church themselves. Everyone was ready except us at this point, so we were left behind with 3 vehicles broke or stuck in the mud. By 9:30 when Dad finally was ready and had AC to us and the original situation had turned from bad to really worse, I gave up on us 4 trying to make it and we spend the morning with my Mamaw. Of course, Mom wasn't happy at all with the whole situation and informed me that things like this is why Dad quit hunting on Sunday mornings a long time ago. I just hung my head and said we really had the best of intentions and will just consider this several lesson learned!

Lesson 1: Don't try to hunt before church even tho so many other people are perfectly capable of this feat. Lesson 2: Don't drive thru a field (even in a Z71) when the total rainfall for the year is at +20 inches. Lesson 3: Even if you aren't driving the vehicle when it gets stuck, if you drove it to the place it got stuck - it is your fault. Lesson 4: No matter if company is expected or not on a Sunday morning before church, Mamaw WILL have coffee, breakfast, and warm socks :)

Today is the Big 6 Month Mark!

Today is AC's 6 month birthday! She amazes me more and more every day. She has reached all of her milestones right on time (if not a little bit early). She is sitting up now and she is eating baby cereal with baby food once a day for supper as well as one jar of baby food for lunch. Her eating amazes me. KL was a good eater, but AC seems to be developing quite the appetite for food, haha! She just loves to eat!

But, as happy as I am with my growing baby girl, this past week has been a little bit emotional for me too. I realized about a week ago that she was really almost 6 months old! It hit me like a ton of bricks. Yes, I am with her everyday all day and can count on one hand (with fingers left over I think) how many days in her short life she has not been with me, but I feel it went entirely too fast! As of today, I would like to hit that instant slow motion replay button that ESPN has so that I can start over from her Day 1 and relive it all in slow motion.

Of course we are alone together most days... all day... with KL (age 8) being the closest thing to having a grown up to talk to around the house, and by bedtime I am about ready to pull my hair out and so ready for them to go to bed so that I can have a little bit of "me" time. It makes me feel a little guilty that time seems to go fast enough every day without me wishing bedtime to come a little faster. So, with this new realization, I am turning a new leaf tomorrow morning. I am going to get up a little bit earlier than the girls. I am going to have some quiet me time in the mornings and not stay up so late at night. This way, my "me" time is out of the way and I can concentrate on the girls and hopefully won't wish away part of the day with them.

James is packing his rental car up right now. Sad day again. He hates having to leave the girls and we hate having him leave. It is hard on KL when he leaves. I thank my lucky stars that he has a great job and one that provides well enough for me to stay home with the girls, but it is getting hard on all of us with him not being around. I so wish he could find a really good paying job here at home!

Days he comes and goes are really just hard days without the goodbyes. It is always during the week which means that KL has school and James and I are running around trying to get him taken care of (packed, shopping, rental car pick up, etc.) while she is at school and for us to be completely finished by the time she gets out. Today, God provided us with a small miracle! He was actually able to get a rental car from HERE... in our town! Amazing! Usually, we have to drive 2 hours one way to get the car. This is 4 hours in the car not including time spent at the rental car place. Knowing school hours, this means that we have to time it right so that we aren't late. We just hate having to ask someone else to pick KL up for us and keep her after school. It is usually his dad, who for sure doesn't mind, but still.

Baby is up crying again.... hope she realizes it was bedtime and not wee nap time and we aren't up all night!

Can we say "Momma"?

James is home for another 4 days or so and we have sure enjoyed our time with him! I am not looking forward to him leaving, but as usual I am looking forward to our normal routine, getting back on track along with the laundry being done, and the house back into shape.


AC is sleeping better than the last time I blogged. I swore when she was born that I really wouldn't complain too much about her sleep habits because she would only be a baby once and wouldn't stay that way long enough for me to fully enjoy her. I am back to that way of thinking. She quickly got out of her not wanting to sleep alone when James comes home. She doesn't like sharing "our" bed with him, haha. In fact, during the night if I wake up to move her between us for nursing, I have noticed that she will wake up and nurse some then roll over and try to "push" him kinda like she wants to push him out of the bed and will then turn back to me. I think it is funny, but luckily he is sleeping because I am sure he wouldn't like it at all.

We made a visit to the doctor last week. It was past time for her normal check-up, but I just couldn't see taking my perfectly healthy child to the doctor's office with all the sickness going around. No telling what we would walk back out with! She has been increasingly fussy lately, but the dr said she is totally healthy. Nothing at all wrong with her, so she is probably teething. She weighs 16 pounds and 5 ounces now and is about 28 inches long. KL didn't get her first tooth until almost the 1 year mark. I really don't look for AC to be popping any out soon, but that doesn't mean they aren't already bothering her.

I started her on baby food/cereal a little earlier than I wanted. Ended up increasing it before I wanted too. She seems to love food and whenever anyone is eating anything she thinks she needs to eat too. I am sticking (so far and plan on continuing) to the same thing I did with KL. If it isn't baby food, she doesn't need even a bite! No reason to give her anything at all unhealthy. If she doesn't eat any type of table food before she is 2, she won't know what she is missing. Just throwing that age out there. I am not saying I stick to baby food that long, but I know with KL I kept her on a very healthy diet until she was about 3 or so and realized that "junk" food was good too. The good thing is that she still likes the healthy stuff. I just don't see the point in feeding them mashed potatoes with all that butter and stuff just because they can eat it when there is healthy baby food out there that they can eat which is good for them without all the extra fat and stuff.

New milestones for AC - she is starting to sit up pretty good. She is rolling around and scooting herself to get to anything and everything that catches her eye. The newest trick... she is saying "Momma". Well, kinda saying it. Really, she only makes a sound that just kinda sounds like it when she is fussy. If she is ready for a change of scenery or getting hungry. I love it. James, however, told her the first time he heard it that she better not say Momma first. Now he denies that she is saying it. I promised him that we practice saying Dada at least once a day! We really do. I am just overly happy that "momma" or anything close to that is coming out of her mouth!

KL is still cheering and luckily we only have 2 more weeks. It is getting too cold to be out there that early on Saturday mornings! Last week, we were all tucked into blankets in the stands. This week looks like it will be the same way again. She is doing so good in school this year and I have been so very proud of her! She still loves it and loves her teacher. She wants to ride the bus to and from school which is a change for me and James. We never wanted her to ride the bus, but she gets upset if she can't. James has been doing the "Watch D.O.G.S." thing again this week. He was at school with her Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. She thinks that is really awesome.

That is about all that is going on here. We are getting ready for Halloween and I need to learn quickly how to add pics here so that I can post them. Probably isn't that hard to do, but I just haven't found the time to pay it any attention. When I find that feature and if it is simple, look out! LOL!

Everyone seems to be blogging....

Why not me too?

James comes home tomorrow. Yay!

Today is Day 28 of his being gone. The laundry isn't done, the house is not yet as clean as I like it to be before he gets home and we let the cleaning slide for a week or so, AC is fussing, and KL says she feels sick to her tummy (of course I did just tell her to pick up her room so is this the normal "sick because I have to clean" or the stomach virus or even flu that is going around?).

So, with all that, this little blog is all you get. Oh, and did I mention that AC not only is crying every time I leave her sight by walking out of the room, she isn't sleeping alone... not at ALL! She only takes a 30 minute nap in the morning until she wakes realizing I am not there. The same in the afternoon but then for our sanity I have to move her to my bed and lay down with her. This has led to the horrible situation of me taking a nap in the afternoon so I can't sleep at night.

SO READY TO PULL MY HAIR OUT!

Just Couldn't Do It!

Well, I posted yesterday (or the day before?) that I had decided to switch AC to formula and today I changed my mind. I just couldn't do it! I called my lactation consultant (the first time I called her since the hospital) and talked (and cried) to her for a long time. She gave me some suggestions that I had not read or heard yet and really gave me a lot of encouragement.

My milk supply has decreased over this weekend even with the pumping so I will be working hard this week to get it back up to par and supplementing with formula when needed. I just hate that right now I can't support her without the formula, but I know it won't be long before we are going strong again! I just didn't realize until we started the formula that sometimes when she is fussy she may still be hungry (not that her thighs show hunger at all LOL!). I don't feel bad right now with supplementing because I am not sure I was producing enough before this little "vacation" for her anyway. I am determined to get it flowing freely again tho and I know we can do it. Keep praying for us (especially all of you nursing/past nursing moms who really understand how it is!)

Yesterday held so many milestones! AC slept thru the night for 2 nights in a row on formula! Amazing and much needed sleep for me, but still not worth switching to formula in my book. Emotionally I can handle lack of sleep and sharing an indescribable bond with my baby than a good nights sleep and a bottle any day!

Later in the day we were at one of my BFF's (as KL calls them) houses. AC was on the floor on a blanket with her toys for some "tummy time". AK laughed because she didn't stay on her tummy. The next minute I looked over and she was back on her tummy. KL said "Mom, she must have rolled over by herself!" AK informed me that she watched her roll over and just assumed she had been doing it a while and I forgot to tell her. My eyes wide open I said "NO! I missed it too!!!" Of course, she thought it was funny that she saw it the first time it happened. Here I am staying at home with the kiddos so I don't miss anything and here she goes and rolls over while I am not looking, haha! I called James inside from the grill and we put her back on her back and sure nuff she just rolled back over to her tummy and her toy. I was so glad that James was home to see it with me the first time :) Today, we have just called her Rollie Pollie Ollie (a Disney baby show from KL's baby years for those of you who don't remember... and I miss that show! I like it!) She is just rolling around everywhere and no blanket today has held her in place for long at all!

4 1/2 Months - I have to tell myself it was a good run!

For the next week or so, me and my family (mainly me and the baby, but James and KL because they may have to deal with some baby fits and mom crying) are in need of prayers. I have finally come to terms that no matter what I do or eat, AC is going to throw up my breast milk. She has been exclusively breastfed for 4 1/2 months. I don't want to stop and she doesn't want to stop, but after every meal she throws up. We got some formula and she spits up just a tiny bit like any normal child. No more major throwing up.

Other than the throwing up, she has done well with breastfeeding. She has gained weight at a normal (maybe even above normal) rate and always happy with it. No problem other than she just throws some of it up. So, even tho I wanted her to be a breastfed only baby until she was old enough to eat and drink "cow" milk (1 year) and maybe even a little longer than a year depending on her and how well the switch went, I have to come to terms with her being bottle fed. I have to keep telling myself that I didn't fail. I have to remember that I am doing what is now best for her. We are at 4 1/2 months. She needs more calories and if she is throwing up 1/4 of what she drinks I have to make the change for her.

Luckily James is home to help with the "fits" when she throws them (so far none!) and to lend me a shoulder for when I cry (not yet, but really close!). Amazingly, she slept thru the night last night which reaffirms to me that she wasn't getting the calories she needed during the day which led to being up 4 times (an average... sometimes more and some nights less) and had to nurse most of the night. She is sleeping and is even a happier baby now than she was. She has always been a VERY pleasant baby! I didn't know it could get even better!!

The only thing I am still holding my breathe on.... the first formula only dirty diaper! For those of you who never exclusively breastfed, you have no clue how EASY diaper duty is can be! Now we have to start dealing with stinky diapers and stained clothes :(

Yes, I am still finding more negatives than positives about this switch, but the only positive (no more throwing up) weighs more than all the negatives!

Who says Friday nights are boring at home alone with the kids?

Whoever thinks that, come to my house!

AC has something going on that is causing vomiting. She has reflux and is on meds, but she was vomiting worse than she ever has before and hasn't missed a dose of her meds. I pray it isn't the stomach virus! She is just too little. :(

As if this wasn't enough for one night, I am sitting at the computer to do a little research on the meds she is taking and I hear a scratching sound in the hallway.

Oh no! We must have a mouse... GROSS!

Bubba, our dog, must have heard it the same time I did because he ran over to the return air box for the central heat and air. He sniffed around and then laid down right in front of it.

Great. Something else to deal with tonight.

I got the flashlight and headed over to the vent. I lowered the vent and my first thought was "I didn't change the filter on the 1st as I normally do." I pulled the corner down to peek inside the box with the flashlight. I was thinking... "If there is a mouse in there, I am going to leave him in there and put a trap in there too and take care of it that way hopefully."

Nothing.

Pull the corner down a little farther.

I can't see any mouse in there so it must have found a way out when it heard me opening the door. If there are any "signs" I will put a trap in there anyway. So, I lower the filter down all the way to the floor on top of the metal vent thingy. I take the flashlight and get all up in the little "box" area to look for whatever could be in there. Nothing at all. This is good news. It hasn't been there long.

I sat back up from leaning over the vent thingy and the filter and reach down to pick up the filter when something on the filter (the interior side that would have been facing into "box" area and the side, when laid down on top of the metal vent thingy, was face up while I was leaning all over it) catches my eye.

I was too scared to scream! On the filter, that I was all but laying on, was a BAT!!!! A BIG, BLACK, SCARY BAT!

I shut that filter and metal vent thingy back up and locked it in place so fast! Of course, I immediately can't breathe right, my heart is going crazy, and all of a sudden I can't see straight.... full blown panic attack!

After a minute, I calmed down enough to call my dad. Daddy is an hour away. He can't help me. He asked me what I did with it.

What I did with it??? I shut it back up in there. What do you think I would do with it? Keep it as a pet?

Then he said the dreaded words... "Stacie, you have to get it out of there before it finds a way out into your house."

My first thought.... my girls!

He then told me to open up the back door and the screen. Turn on all the lights in the house since bats like the dark. Open the vent back up and take the filter outside and it will fly away.

Then I think to myself... Me???? Oh yeah, it could get out and get to my girls. Just put on your big girl panties (that I all but had to change by this point!) and handle business.

I told dad I would just call him back when I got the nerve to do it. He said "don't wait or it may move off the filter."

That got me moving because I sure didn't want to have to touch it!

I put on some latex gloves (these are a staple in my house as something kinda like my security blanket... to be used for any dirty job, cooking and/or handling raw meat or just the unimaginable like I was about to do even tho my hands are scrubbed well after the job is done) and a colander with a handle. I turned on every light we have plus the flashlight for extra measure. I shut all the doors in the house. I didn't want it going into the bedrooms or the bathroom. Keep it headed in the right direction if it gets loose.

As I continued to tell myself over and over that I HAD to do this for my girls. I lowered the gate. I slowly lowered the filter expecting this bat to come flying out at my head like you see in the movies but it didn't. Praise the Lord it was still on the filter! But it was crawling towards me!! I dropped the colander on top of it trapping it on top of the filter.

Now, you know that bats use sound to "see" and they make a clicking noise. But, did you know that when you have one trapped between a filter and a colander and you are running like a mad woman out the back door that you can actually feel those clicks in your bones? I swear! Fear may have been a factor too tho :)

Needless to say, when I got to the backdoor, I just threw it all and shut the door. I have never been so proud when I called my dad back saying "I did it!"

James, on the other hand, wouldn't stop laughing long enough to hear the story when I called him. I will have to make him pay when he gets home!

KL's Summer Job

KL is at Meme and Pap's for the night. She just called me to check on me because of the storm. Her and Pap are watching Ch 16 news at 9 before they go to bed. She told me that a bad storm was headed my way and she was worried. Awe! But the storm had hit and was gone about an hour before she called me, haha. Still, I have such a sweet little girl!

The next segment on the news was summer jobs. Now, she is only 8 and said "Summer jobs huh? I need to check into that!" Just as serious as can be. "How about I just set up a lemonade stand outside our house. It could be a drive through. I need to earn some money for a manicure and pedicure. I need one bad! I mean, have you seen me?"

Oh my! I am not going to be able to afford this girl by the time she is a teenager!

Good Intentions

I am a person with good intentions lots of times. I don't really consider this a good thing because of my lack of follow through. My mom is the type with good intentions and always follows through. Me... I don't always follow through. I am a procrastinator. I admit it. I need help! But NOT today, haha. Today, I decided first thing this morning, would be a day of nothing but kid-mommy time. No cleaning, no working on anything, no mom's tv time (which I usually don't get a chance to do anyway). Just play/game time all day long!

Let me start with yesterday. Nana called KL yesterday morning to see if she wanted to go eat lunch. As many of you know, me and my MIL don't always get along. In fact, lately we seldom get along. We just have different ideas and beliefs. I will not get into any details of this in this blog because my blood pressure doesn't need to go up. I will say that I do not keep my kids away from her (or my husband but that is another blog for another day!). Yesterday, KL wanted to go and I said yes she could. So, Nana arrives at the house and gives hugs and kisses to the girls and her and KL leave. AC decided to take a nap. What's a mom to do?

I had been trying to find time to scrub my bedroom floor. My bedroom is the hardest floor to scrub. AC's room has small furniture and a large open space in the middle. Easy to move things to the center, scrub the outside and then move things back. KL's bed is a bunk that has no bottom bed. It is a desk. This leaves almost all of her floor open for the same routine as AC's room. My bedroom, however, is the smallest room with the biggest furniture. It is harder to move things around. I decided with the girls both settled in other activities it was a good time to scrub the floor.

Fast forward to today...

We all woke up in an extra good mood. AC was even giving KL sweet baby kisses and I am usually the only one who gets those. *SMILES* I had AC on my shoulder and KL leaned in close to tell her good morning. AC was quick and leaned right over and gave her a big open mouth sweet baby kiss right on her cheek. I decided right then and there that today was going to be an extra good day and I was spending time with my girls only and any cleaning could wait.

I stepped out of the bed and saw the mess. The dog. At this moment, my first thought was "the stupid dog!" Can't blame him though. Apparently in the middle of the night, Bubba (our Yorkie) had a little bit of tummy trouble. There was a mess in the middle of my floor! The freshly scrubbed floor!!!

Oh my! I settled the girls in the living room with breakfast and headed back to the bedroom to clean up the mess. Wasn't too hard to clean it up but I wasn't thinking and put the paper towels in the bathroom trash can. About 30 minutes later, I went into the bathroom and WHEW! This lead to me taking out the trash and then scrubbing down the entire bathroom to rid of the smell.

So much for my non-cleaning day. At least all this was done in the morning hours and I have this afternoon to do nothing but play!

1 AM and I Still Can't Sleep!

First of all, I would like to say that I have been thanking God everyday that my hubby has a job and is bringing home a paycheck! I know so many people out of work with this economy and I am so very thankful that James' job seems secure for now. I have, however, been stressed about money lately. That is why, again tonight, I can't seem to sleep.

Budget... looks good on paper, but things just keep coming up! I am working hard (VERY HARD) to cut down on some of the expenses around here. I am going over everything with a fine tooth comb. Of course, the weather isn't being my friend right now. My AC is running non-stop to keep the house at 80 degrees. Here again, I don't know why and calling someone in to look at it tomorrow is going to be another unexpected expense that I just don't have.

I am not sure right now where I am going to cut back, but I am sure Wal-Mart will be getting much less of my money in the future! James swears that the only cleaning supplies you need are Windex and Lysol spray. Not sure I agree, but I am sure I purchase a lot of stuff for the house that isn't exactly needed.

I don't really have a whole lot to say about all of this except that I am trying my best to follow the Lord's will about money and finance. We don't have a lot of debt. We have my car payment and that is about it. The rest is just everyday stuff that we have to pay. I am so thankful that we aren't forking out money to credit cards and bank loans which would make all this budget stuff impossible. We do, however, now have medical bills from AC's birth to find the money for.

I guess I am just venting a little tonight. Please say some prayers for us about making good decisions when it comes to money.

Relaxing day or sad day?

KL decided to spend the night with my parents last night. She hasn't been around today. I thought this would be a really good thing and I could catch up on sleep. Normally, even when AC sleeps I can't because KL is up and likes to play outside a lot. I don't trust her not to go outside without me knowing about it.

Catch up on sleep? YES!!! I have slept just about every time AC has slept today. Now I am worried I won't sleep a wink tonight, haha!

I have done well all day, but now the sun is going down again. I am starting to feel a little blueish. One thing for sure about having both of my girls here is that they keep me and my mind so busy that baby blues hasn't had a chance to show it's ugly face.

My neighbors officially moved out today. We lived in this house for 8 years now. We have never had neighbors on either side. Both houses have been empty until about 11 months ago. Best I can remember, it was just before we found out about AC coming along a family moved in the house right next door while their house was being built. We knew it would only be for about 9 months. I remember thinking "Great! Here we go... I don't really want neighbors. I like the feeling we are kinda here alone." Now that they moved out today, I am sad that I don't have neighbors. We didn't really get close over the last year, but I was finally use to walking out the backdoor and having someone to say hello to. Today, I think I am crazy for the sudden change of emotions, haha! That is another reason I am blaming it on a little bit of baby blues today.

I read yesterday about "nursing vacations" and decided that is what me and AC needed while KL is at Meme and Pap's house. Maybe it wasn't what we needed. Basically, you just go to bed with the baby and sleep lots and nurse often. Helps with bonding, milk supply, and just basically well being by catching up on sleep. I can't stay in the bed that much when not a have to, so we camped out on the couch with the bassinet right next to it. There has been lots of holding and talking and bonding that's for sure. Guess it is a good thing except for those ugly baby blues showing their face!

I have rented a movie to watch tonight. James comes home Wednesday!!! Tomorrow, I will clean like the devil has been in the house even tho it really doesn't need it. It will keep me busy and cleaning always boosts my spirits :) Just gotta make it through this crazy, hormonal day!

Is everyone in a funk?

Two friends of mine posted blogs today about their blogging. These two friends do not know each other and as far as I know, do not read each other's blogs. So I find it ironic that they posted them within the hour of each other and both kinda had the same things to say. As for both of them referring to my blog... I think not since it has been weeks since I posted one, haha!

The first post that showed up talked about whether to continue blogging or not because she feels blogging is on the downhill slide and that when she started blogging and still now doesn't think people are all that interested in her life. The second friend blogged about her life being simple and not having as many "adventures" as others. To both of you, I will repeat... KEEP IT UP!

I know I haven't blogged much at all lately, but I have been a little tied up with our newest addition (who I haven't blogged about in quite a while, but she is doing wonderful!) Reading both the other blogs just got me thinking today about my life and blogging in general.

Is my life interesting enough to blog about? I agree with the first friend in that when I started this, and still now, I really wonder if anyone really cares to read about my life. When put into a blog, most of the time it just sounds boring to me so I can only imagine what it seems like for everyone else. Along the same lines as my 2nd friend... too simple? Yes. Very. Thanks. I like it that way! You should appreciate your simple life too and not worry about what everyone else is doing. Do what works for you :)

Thinking back over the years since I got married, I have had 4 jobs. I have had more than this, but I am just talking about my adult/married life.

The first job was the job I was holding when I got married. It was at a local business here (leaving out the details to protect the not-so-innocent people I am about to discuss). The owner was going through a rough patch in her life. She was getting a divorce, had three children, and 5 (that I knew of) men she was dating. WOW! That is more than a handful of drama that for sure isn't simple and would fill many blogs with interesting info! Would I want that? Not in a million years! She was getting back out there after years being a wife and mother and really letting her hair down and having what the world looks at as "fun". Was it? I wouldn't think so. I saw her cry lots. The "fun" is just a front. You really wouldn't want that at all!

The second job, I took shortly after our wedding. It was at a local doctor's office. The people were super nice! I loved my boss, his wife (who many people didn't care for), and my co-workers. Why did I leave? The pay wasn't the best and by this time we had KL and I needed more money. Everyone here was settled and married and loved their own spouse (and no one else's, haha!) and loved their kids. The wife worked at the office from about 9-10 until about 2 every day. She made it clear that she helped there but her main job was her family and her focus was on the children. Having just had KL, I wished desperately that my family and children could be my main focus and not have to hold down a stinking job. This is what fueled my post-pardum (sp?) depression after KL. My life just wasn't simple enough.

The third job I took just after KL's first birthday. It paid more, and the hours were better than a doctor's office. There was a lot more employees (all female at the time) at this job which means lots more hormones! I just tried to sit at my desk and do my job without drawing attention to myself. I didn't want a lot of interaction. I just wanted to do my job and leave ASAP to rush to my baby. The depression was easing, but I still just felt work was not where I should be. At the same time, the bills showed I had to be there. After being there 6 months, my supervisor quit, I applied for her job (even with only 6 months experience in this line of work), and somehow was offered the position. What I didn't realize was how much more I would have to deal with! The hours got longer, the hormones were unavoidable, and the work much harder! My life went from just not simple enough to mega stress!

The last job (hopefully the last forever!) is strictly a stay at home mother and wife. I don't see my life getting any more simple or drama free! More hormonal? Yes as we have two daughters and I will eventually go through menopause, so I am sure the hormones are yet to come, haha! But, I love it.

The reason I went the "job" route is... I may not have much of anything interesting to blog about and my readers may not care to even read it, but I will continue on if only because years from now I will read back at this simple, drama free life and remember the wonderful times I have had with my family and friends. I type faster than I write, so consider this my way of a journal. Don't like the simple, drama free life? Find another blog to read :) I personally love my daily routine and seldom except change well. With the new baby, I am having to redevelop my daily routine, but this is a very acceptable change for me! If daily I just blog about my daily routine and other boring stuff, remember those blogs are more for me than my readers.

Mother's Day

I hope everyone had a WONDERFUL Mother's Day!

It was my first Mother's Day with both KL and AC. I had an excellent day! James was home and we spent the weekend with my family. Everything was great!

Friday KL brought home a poem that she wrote herself. I was very impressed and felt very much loved! I will include it here for the world to read as she wrote it :)

My Mother Is...

as sweet as a flower
as lovly as a new born pupy
as specl as a baby
as smart as a sintest

Love your
doter, Kathryn

New Arrival!

Well, it has been a while since I blogged, but I have been busy!!!

Last Friday, April 24th, I went into labor with Miss AC! I toddled around the house all day long while having contractions, waiting for them to get closer and stronger, and doing the last minute stuff I had to do before going to the hospital. I decided I could wait until KL got home from school to head that way. I went and had lunch with a good friend and called James. I told him that I wasn't positive, but thought that it was time. He started the process of coming home and planned on getting off the boat at 5 PM.

KL got home from school and about 5 PM we headed to the hospital. They doubted that I was in labor, but I explained that I progressed quickly with KL and the contractions (even tho they didn't sound typical to them) felt the exact same as with KL. They decided to keep me over night for observation. James made it in about 12:30 AM. Saturday morning they told me I had not progressed any and to go home until the contractions were closer together and stronger. The contractions continued and slowly got closer together and stronger. My dr was out for the weekend and she had another dr taking her calls. My dr called Sunday morning to check on me when she returned to town. I told her that I was still having steady contractions that were progressively getting stronger and closer together. She told me that we would induce on Monday morning but if I couldn't take the pain anymore to come back and they would admit me and give me something for pain. Sunday night at 9:30 I had had enough and went in. They gave me a shot first, which helped for a couple hours and then they started my epidural.

I wasn't pleased at all with the nursing staff that night. I will not get into any details here, but will be talking to my dr about it when I go for my follow up and possibly filing a complaint. Shifts changed at 7:00 AM and I loved the nurse I had for the delivery! She was awesome! Dr B arrived at the hospital that morning and came to check on me. She broke my water at 8:13 and AC was born at exactly 8:15 AM Monday April 27th. We stayed at the hospital until Tuesday evening (due to the dr not able to come discharge me any sooner) and headed home.

AC has been such a blessing! I never realized how much my life would change with the arrival of another baby. Well, I was in denial about how my life would change with another, haha! She is different than KL. AC is a little fussier and there are some nights we don't sleep well, but at the same time I am older (by 7 years and 10 months) and more mature. I feel that I am handling this new baby much better than I did KL and all the post-pardum (sp?) hormones that go along with new babies.

The hardest part this week has been finding time to devote just to KL. I am exclusively breast feeding and AC didn't sleep at all for 2 nights in a row. James is here and is taking up lots of time with KL, but today being Saturday and her not in school, I noticed that she noticed the lack of attention from me. She decided to act out (not too bad) and pick fights with her dad because she knows that I step in when they get too loud and rough. Tomorrow, I will have to devote time just to her and make her feel extra special. I know, but she doesn't understand, that after this first week and we start getting into a routine things will be better. For now, I just feel that I spend my day breastfeeding, diapering, and washing (baby's clothes, baby's butt, breast pump supplies, and hopefully myself at some point during the day). What little time is left is devoted to my eating and sleeping... and believe me there isn't much time left for my eating and sleeping! My parents were also here all day today and she notices anytime she is not the center of her Pap's attention!

I have learned this week that I can function on 2 hours of sleep a day. I have learned that I can breastfeed for another 30 minutes if the last hour wasn't enough for her and everything else can wait and still be there when we are done. I have learned that both my children are extra special to me and my love for each grows every day. I have learned that with more children you produce more love for each and never have to take love away from one to give to another. Even though it isn't a new lesson, it was reinforced to me that when you are at your wits end never to forget to PRAY!

Family Reunion, Baby Shower, Softball, and so much more!

Friday my dad called and talked me into coming a day early for the family reunion. KL and I decided, last minute, to head that way together instead of her going Friday and me coming Saturday. Made for a long night, but I was really glad that I got the extra time to visit.

Saturday we spent the day at the family reunion and had a lot of fun. There were several people there and, despite the rain, enjoyed ourselves crammed into my Mamaw's house. The oldest relative in attendance was my Aunt Sue. Her real name is Audrey (how she got the nickname Sue I am still not sure), and several weeks ago was the first time I heard her real name was Audrey. When my Mamaw mentioned her real name, I perked up and said "I love the name Audrey! That is what I am naming my baby girl!" So, I guess you could say that Miss AC, who we are still waiting on to make an appearance, was named after my great-grandmother's sister. I got to my grandmother's house about 9:30 Saturday morning to help her with cooking (and I also wanted some of her good breakfast!) and left headed back to mom and dad's after midnight. It was a forever long day!

Sunday was my baby shower for the church/family. It was held at my Aunt Sheila's house and we got lots of nice stuff. I wasn't sure until about a week ago if I would have one or not being this is my second child, but it is sooooo nice since there are eight years (minus 2 months) between my girls. When we got home Sunday night, I had to dive back into all the gifts and make sure everything was put away. I am such a procrastinator and just can't take the chance putting things off with the due date so close now. Of course, I had just as much fun going through everything again :)

Monday KL had a check up with the dentist and I was so glad everything was fine. The area around the tooth that caused so many problems a couple weeks ago and we removed is fine. We are going to have to do a spacer to hold that spot for her permanent tooth, but all else is fine :) Of course, she didn't understand why she had to go to school after her appointment since it was already "sooooo late in the day, mom!" at 10 AM, haha. I tried to tell her she didn't need to miss anymore school with the new baby coming. I keep telling her that if she wants to miss days with the baby she can't miss them now. I don't think she understands, haha.

She had her first softball game tonight. It was my night to bring snacks. That was a nightmare! I don't even want to get into it right now, but Fred's isn't always quicker than Wal-Mart! If it could go wrong, it did. It all ended with the tape running out on the register and them telling me I couldn't leave because they didn't have proof my debit card processed. After 30 minutes dealing with the checker they seemed to remember there is a backup tape stored in the register that did in fact have my confirmation number on it and I was free to go with my paid for snacks. We made it to the game JUST IN TIME and maybe would have been a little late if they weren't having issues with the pitching machine. Luckily, we won the first game of the season. I was very proud of all the girls. They made several really good plays. Mom and Dad made it to the game and we all went out for supper after. Late night for my baby!

I feel totally drained after this weekend! On "paper" here, it doesn't seem like I physically did much to be so tired, but in all reality I don't feel like I sat down all weekend. I kept thinking "I hope I don't go into labor before I get some stuff at home done!" I was really hoping I wasn't using my "nesting" energy, haha. I guess not though because still no signs of labor. I just have problems going to sleep at night when things aren't done. Mom and Dad brought my baby swing from storage to me tonight. After we got home and I got KL to sleep I did manage to disinfect it properly and wash the seat cover. While I was at it, I did the high chair tray again and honestly now that I am sitting here thinking about it, I am not sure why as I just did that a couple weeks ago when it came out of storage and it will be MONTHS before the baby uses a high chair.... I will just have to do it over again when that time comes, haha. Oh well, I guess I felt like I was getting something done at the time.

I had planned on doing nothing Tuesday but laying around and maybe catch up on some TV watching, but I ran out of time today getting things done. Tuesday I need to wash the baby clothes received at the shower and repack the "baby bag" as I have new outfits I want to take with me. Scott and Andrea gave AC the most beautiful dress to come home in and I can't wait to get it washed and packed up! Then of course, there is the normal household stuff like floors, bathroom, and sheets that must be done again. Hopefully, I can rest on Wednesday! I will be refusing to do much of anything on Thursday through Sunday as my doctor is out of town and those are the days I really do not want labor to start. Knowing my luck.... I won't even say it!

Test results and the hubby's point of view

Well, just after I posted the earlier blog James called home. I talked to him about what was going on. He is totally against ADD medicine as I have been for so many years. I told him that I just couldn't ignore the symptoms anymore. He wants to try "him talking to her one more time" before we proceed. I said ok.

I went to the school to pick KL up and stopped by the office. The results from our quizzes were in. Mine showed "Moderate need" and the teacher's showed "Mild need". I said I didn't want to proceed any further until James had a chance to talk to KL and came home where we could all sit down and talk about it together. They agreed that would be fine.

I talked to KL and told her by the teacher's results and my results it seemed to me that she was just not minding me as much at home as she was her teacher at school. She said "Yeah, maybe." WHAT??? Did you really just agree that you don't mind? I didn't say that, but that's what I thought, haha. I just told her that her Dad would be calling tonight to talk to her about this situation. At this point, I just want to throw my hands up and scream! Maybe it is hormones, maybe there is something to it, or maybe my patients has just run out, haha. Either way, I don't feel as guilty about the punishments/groundings she has had at home since apparently she needed some of it, haha.

Am I the only one who has trouble with their kids following directions? Have I just said so much over the years and let her change my mind with things enough times that she feels she doesn't have to listen? I still think there is something going on, but I just can't put my finger on it. I still think that she has ADD, even if it is a mild case (which I knew it wasn't severe to begin with). I still just don't know what to do to fix the problems. Anyone else had any experience with this in a mild form that has some tips that doesn't include medication since James and I neither one like that idea?

The house, children and ADD

My house needs help. I don't know what to do. Bending isn't as easy as it was even a couple weeks ago. I really wish there was an easier way to clean the bathroom, haha. Everything requires bending. The shower/tub, the toilet, the floor all require bending over. Ball practice three times a week has also taken a toil on my body, haha. I am really trying not to complain much about how miserable and tired I am with this pregnancy. It doesn't help any at all and honestly, I know no one wants to hear complaints anyway.

I went to the doctor yesterday for my weekly visit. I had not made any more progress. We went ahead and scheduled an induction for April 30th "just in case". Today I am 38 weeks. I really wouldn't mind having her next Wednesday if any of you know how to put that order in for me, haha!

My appointment yesterday was at 9:30. Apparently my clock was 5 minutes off as I got there 5 minutes late. Lucky for me, there is a friend of mine who is using the same doctor and happened to be in for her appointment yesterday too. She was already in the back when I arrived, but her hubby was in the waiting room. We were able to visit for about 30 minutes to pass the time until A was finished and they were on their way. About 40 minutes of more waiting and I was really wondering why they punish someone so much for only being 5 minutes late when the clerk informed me that Dr was on call this week and had been called in to the hospital for an emergency. That was the reason for my long wait and it would probably be better if I came back that afternoon or Thursday. The thought of driving an hour back home and doing it all again the next day just really didn't sound good at all! I picked taking a long lunch and going back at 1:00. From then on, all went well.

I was asked if I would allow a student nurse follow me through the rest of my pregnancy and delivery. For education sake, I said sure! She was at the appointment yesterday also and this was the first time I met and talked to her. She is really nice. I have heard horror stories about student nurses coming in while you are in labor and more than one doing the same things over and over. It is my understanding that I will have only one and she will be at my side (opposite James) holding my hand. I figured since there is a possibility James won't make it home in time, it would be nice to have someone there with me. I haven't talked to any other person or family member about coming with me in case James isn't there because I, honestly, just don't think I want anyone else in the room with me. Of course, my mother would be my choice and I just don't think I would handle that well. So, if James doesn't make it me and the student nurse, Amanda, will be just fine :) Also, she told me that if I happen to go into labor any Mon-Wed, she will be like my "private nurse" for my entire hospital stay. I just laughed and told her that sounded great and all, but I was pretty much an independant person and wouldn't want her hanging around too much, haha.

I did talk to KL's teacher and counselor yesterday about ADD. Here are some examples of what happens at home.

First things in the morning I have to tell her 50,000 times to get her clothes on. She will get a shirt then be off on something else, shirt in hand, and forget she is to look for pants. When she finally has all her clothes picked out, she will put on her shirt then decide she is thirsty. Get a drink and on the way back to the living room with it, set it on the kitchen table because she noticed Bubba is running around with his bone. She will start to chase him and I will ask her if she ever got a drink. She will say yes, but she forgot to drink it. She will go back and get her drink and 20 minutes after she picked out her clothes still only has on her shirt. Of course, this is just an example and I tell you it is constantly like this at our house. She would be naked, starved, and dehydrated if I didn't remind her that she was getting dressed, eating, or drinking before she got distracted. If it is something she doesn't want to do, it can take her hours to complete a task.

I have made it a point to notice more over the last month. Another example... She had three toys in her floor. A stuffed animal, a barbie doll, and a book. Her teacher had recommended trying a timer so I thought, now is a good time to try it. I told her I was setting the timer for 10 minutes and she was to pick up the three toys in her floor and put them away. She said she understood and I left the room. This is WAY more than enough time to put the three things away. I went in after 5 minutes and her bed was COVERED with stuffed animals and she was "arranging" (more like playing to me) them on the bed. I told her that would not work to put them all way because she would not have a bed covered with stuffed animals. When the timer went off, I went into her room. The book was still in the floor. Only half the stuffed animals had returned to their box and she was sitting in the floor playing with the barbie doll plus 50 of her friends. I asked her why in 10 minutes her room looked worse than when she started. She said she never got to the book. When she was returning the stuffed animals to their box in the closet she stepped on the Barbie. When she picked up the Barbie to put it away, she decided to change her Barbie's clothes really fast and then forgot to stop playing and finish her task.

It has made me mad for the last 6 years (when she reached the age she should be following instructions somewhat) that she doesn't seem to follow instructions well and have tried different forms of punishment. We have even told her that she is old enough to clean her room on her own and if she doesn't, whatever toys are left in the floor at bedtime goes in the trash. At bedtime, when all her toys are out, she will cry and say she tried but couldn't do it alone. I even thrown a few things out just to prove my point, but it doesn't change. We have taken toys away, taken privileges away, grounded, talked, and all it has gotten me is more confused as to what to try next.

I had talked to my mother and told her I suspected ADD (NOT ADHD), but have been in denial about it. My mother agreed and said I should talk to the school. At school, her teacher says she sits quietly and doesn't distract others at all, but still can't get her work completed timely. "She daydreams" were her teachers exact words yesterday. I asked her if she thought ADD was a possibility. She laughed and said "Yes, many times but since she has had this issue for so long and no other teacher mentioned it I didn't want to." I politely explained that maybe it was best she did because maybe all the other teachers didn't want to either for the same reason and I am feeling like a really bad mom now because I really think she has this condition and I have been punishing her for years when it is a disorder she can't help. The counselor gave me a "home form" and the teacher a "school form" and asked us to answer questions based on KL's work. I returned mine today and get to wait for the results.

Both of them really think she shows signs now that we have all talked about it. I don't feel as alone. Especially since my mother seems to back me up also. My biggest fear is the medicine. I don't want her treated for hyperactivity at all. I do not want a zombie for a child. I do not want her eating habits to change. All I want is for her to be able to listen to instructions and follow them without what seems like constant reminders! I do feel horrible for all the punishment she has had to endure if she does have ADD. As I mentioned above (and no, I know my punishments aren't horrible, haha) she has been punished for something that may be just out of her control. I also feel like she has missed out on things at school because of her lack of attention. She is an excellent reader and in the top reading group of her class. She is a very bright and smart student. Her grades are good. She can't spell, but neither can her mother so she gets it honest, haha! I have been proud of her in school, but at the same time she probably could have been doing so much better and had a much more easier time with it if I had faced up to the signs before now. Yeah, I am really beating myself up over all this too.

The good news... If the results from our quizzes come back that she probably does have ADD we will have all summer to find the right medicine and dosage that is right for her over the summer and third grade will be easier with a lot less parent/teacher conferences. I have been told it is a big jump now from 2nd to 3rd grade and at least we got together on this now instead of later. I can't imagine how much I would be beating myself up if I had waited even one more year to face the facts.

Preparations

Maybe I am nesting after all, maybe I am just anxious, and maybe I am just OCD to the extreme lately! Monday I commented that there was still so much to do and I had no energy to get it done. I can't say that I have had a lot of energy the last couple days, but I can say that because I want to make positive EVERYTHING is done, the house is perfect, and all is taken care of for up to to 3 days if I went into labor right now I have forced myself to work my tail off!

I have one more load of baby clothes to wash, dry and put away. I plan on finishing that before bed tonight. All of the current inhabitants of the house's clothes are washed, dried, and put away (except the clothes we are currently wearing). The kitchen is clean. All the household business is handled until next Friday. Easter is taken care of totally for KL except the eggs we will dye tomorrow night (can't do that too far in advance!) It took one full day just for our clothes and today it took all day to handle nothing but the baby clothes. I need to find my camera and post some pics of the nursery, but I think I will wait until tomorrow. (By the way, KT I will TRY to take some preggo pics of myself for ya... hard to take pics of yourself tho.)

My father-in-law is coming to put together the gift from my parents in the morning. They got the baby a dresser that matches the crib and bookshelf :) I am excited about this! Right now, there are clothes on the bookshelf and twin bed that is in the nursery that will go into the dresser. Tomorrow morning I should be able to get all of them put away and get my bag packed. After that I plan on cleaning the bathroom and mopping the kitchen, bathroom and bedroom floors. The end of the week is in sight! Oh yeah, I also have to wash sheets since it will be Friday and it didn't get done on the normal day of Wednesday! Wouldn't hurt to give the house a dusting again too. Once I accomplish all of this, I will feel better about being prepared for labor any day.... maybe!

As of today, I am officially 37 weeks! If AC isn't here by April 30th we are going to induce. I know that I have probably said that a million times, haha! We don't plan on her taking that long. I may throw out a little TMI right here, haha but in all honesty with the schedule James work schedule, I can tell you that the date of conception figured for my April 30th due date isn't right. The story is like this... July 2008 James was home for 2 weeks. He went back to work and was gone for 5 days. He had a medical issue that sent him back home on August 1st. He had surgery on August 5th. He came home from the hospital on August 6th. They figured "conception date" of August 8th and I can tell ya for sure that's not when it happened, haha. He was still on some pretty strong pain medicine and I was waiting on him hand and foot for at least a full week. There was no hanky panky in this house until about 2 weeks later. This means that the REAL conception date was somewhere from August 1st till August 4th. That would put me at 38 weeks right now instead of 37. I keep using the WRONG date because that is officially what is in my chart at the doctor's office. It hasn't been a big deal for me to know it wasn't exactly right until the last week or two when the end of this pregnancy is actually in sight! Considering my doctor told me last week she didn't see me making it until April 23rd (what would be my due date if you figured on the REAL day of conception), I feel like skipping a week now and saying I am 38, haha!

Either way, I don't have too much longer so I am sure you will be reading a lot about chores and getting ready for baby over the next couple of weeks. I will try not to be too boring, but basically there isn't just a whole lot going on besides that. KL does have softball practice 3 days a week (Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday of every week) which takes up a lot of time, but there isn't much to say about ball practice. Tomorrow night we are going to Erin's for KL and KK to dye Easter eggs. They have done it together for the last several years and seem to really enjoy it. I will have pics of that to post (if I can figure out how to do it on here again) tomorrow night along with pics of the nursery.

Until tomorrow!

Preparations for a busy couple of weeks!

I am really excited! Saturday my Mom came over and we went Easter dress shopping. I actually found a cute spring dress :) I haven't done any dress shopping since last year at this time as I didn't really need any until I got pregnant and then what's the use? I just feel it is wasteful to purchase something that you only wear a couple times. Well, guess I bought a dress now that I will wear for a couple times and be done with it, but still... I will get to wear a new dress for Easter and then wear it the next week to my baby shower. Well, if AC stays where she is for that long, haha! I will get to that in a minute :)

Sunday morning we headed to church and it was a very special day! The sermon was awesome! Saturday night I had watched a DVR'd episode of Dr. Charles Stanley that I wanted to watch and didn't have time when it came on. Sunday, Bro. Nick preached what could be considered a continuation of Dr. Charles Stanley's sermon I had watched the day before. I don't think when it comes to the Word of God that things are coincidental so God must have really been talking to me! Dr. Stanley was preaching on Walking in Step with God. As a saved person, God has promised never to leave me which means that God is always with me, but walking in step with God is totally different. His point was that it is always easier when walking next to someone if you are walking in step together. Then Bro. Nick preached about Camping in Canaan. One of his main points was that if we aren't following or walking with God the way we should, we will have what we need and even as a human be satisfied, but walking with God we actually reach something much more special. The points to both sermons were basically the same and I took them both to heart. Of course, just listening to preaching isn't enough. Now is the hard part of applying it to my life and taking the necessary actions to reach the goals I have set for myself.

Another awesome thing about church Sunday was that my Aunt Robbin was baptized. She joined our church last Sunday on profession of faith and as a candidate for baptism. I mentioned this in my blog last week, but Sunday morning was her baptism. It was a very special time for her and our whole family.

After church, we ate at Mamaw's really quick and headed back home. KL had a birthday party to attend :) It was a little rush to get back in time, but it was one that she didn't want to miss. It was for her little "boyfriend". I am not to sure about this boyfriend business, haha! But he really is a sweet kid who's parents seem to be raising him right with good morals. For the 2nd grade, don't guess I could ask for more, haha!

Monday was another busy day. I went to the doctor just after dropping KL off at school. Dr. B said that I am now dilated to a 2! I went a whole nother centimeter since last week :) This is good and bad news. The good news is that AC will probably come a little early... the bad news is that AC may come a little early, haha! I am now far enough along that she will be considered "full term". I am not in any way (at this point) worried about her health if she comes even right now, which is something I am VERY thankful for! I, personally, wouldn't even mind if she did come today! I just get a little anxious after KL's delivery... I barely made it the 3 miles to the hospital and this time I have an hour drive to the hospital. I am trying to remind myself what labor felt like with KL so that I don't make the same mistake again, but at the same time remember that it COULD be different this time too. Basically, I am scared now of going into labor and not knowing it in time like I did with KL. The bad news about AC coming early is getting James home from the boat. I have to call him the second I go into labor if she is early because he won't already be home. Note the other concern about not knowing I am in labor, haha. But the biggest deal would be the sooner he comes home, the longer we go without pay. I am trying my best to put my trust in God to handle all of this, but it is hard at times. If he provides for the lilies of the valley, how much more will he provide for me? I am trying to keep that in my head at all times. I prepared financially for James to be off work his normal 2 weeks off and another week (before or after AC comes along) for a total of 3 weeks, so what is another week or 2 right? LOL! Don't know why this is bothering me all of a sudden, unless my hormones just don't have anything else to focus on right now, haha!

When I got back to town I ate lunch and then got KL from school. Monday's are ball practice nights, but thankfully the early practice. She can be in bed at her normal time. They are Benchmark testing starting tomorrow and she needs her sleep. She is a good morning person (the opposite of me!) so getting her up early for a good breakfast shouldn't be a problem. Now that I say this, we will have a morning full of problems! Ball practice went well tho and she is fed, showered, and in the bed :)

As far as AC's arrival, I don't think I am as ready as I should be. I have the room completed. I have all the basic necessities plus some, but my baby shower isn't until the 19th. Dr. B made the comment today that she is wrong a lot when guessing a baby's arrival, but she doesn't think I will make it to the 23rd. I hope that I do make it that long if for no other reason to have my baby shower before her arrival. I had KL's shower after her arrival and we had to make many quick runs to Wal-Mart for stuff I didn't have yet and needed. I have tried to prepare myself as much as possible in case this happens again, but I think it will be much more fun to have the gifts to use when she gets here and not have to wait. I do still have some of KL's clothes from her first year (mostly onesies and sleepers) that need to be washed. James pulled them all out for me while he was home, but I haven't begun the washing process. I also need to pack my bags for the hospital. After today's visit to the doctor, that is first on my list of To Do's tomorrow! Again, I didn't have mine packed with KL and really wished I had! Another mistake I don't want to make. I should have had the bag packed for a couple weeks now, but just haven't yet. Guess tomorrow I will pack my bag, clean house, and then work on baby laundry. That will make me feel better prepared :) If anyone wants to help, you know where I will be, haha!

Blogs...

Tonight I was in need of some quiet time. KL is in the bed and the whole Nana getting KL tonight was NOT relaxing or anything close to it! I did let KL go with her for supper only and just needed some me time after she went to bed. I choose to use my "me time" going through my old Myspace blogs. Since today was my first posting here, I copied some old blogs over to this new one so they wouldn't get lost if I did decide to delete my Myspace account. Some are funny and some are deep thoughts. Hope you enjoy if you read back :)

It's Friday... Gotta start somewhere so why not a week in review :)

I feel like this has been doctor week for us! Believe it or not, my family rarely has a great need to go to the doctor (except James). James was diagnosed 5 years ago with Adult On-set Juvenile Diabetes. He maintains his blood sugar with insulin and has not had any diabetes complications since his diagnosis. It is rare for an adult to be diagnosed as he was. Common cold he couldn't get over, saw a doctor once who happened to take the time to do a full blood work up, and we walked out of the office with more diabetes meds than cold meds. I am so thankful she decided to run those tests 5 years ago before it was too late and I have to remember that when it seems the Coast Guard requires what seems like so many unnecessary tests now.

Sunday James, KL, and I spent the day with the Fam. We went to church Sunday morning and it was a very special day. Aunt Robbin joined our church by profession of faith and will be baptized this coming Sunday. This is wonderful! I am so thankful that she has been attending church with us since Uncle Ronnie's death. I truly hope she has found the comfort a wonderful church family offers. KL complained several times this weekend about her jaw hurting. We figured it was a tooth that got an infected last December that had not been pulled since it easily cleared up. She was active, but didn't eat much at all Sunday. Anyone who has ever been around my Mamaw knows on Sundays EVERYONE eats a lot, haha!

Monday was a planned "Doctor Day" for us. James is working on his pilot's license for the Coast Guard. No, this doesn't mean he will be flying planes... he will be driving boats. He has advanced in his job as much as possible until he qualifies for his license. He has taken the classes and passed all the tests and we are working on the medical/physical part. Hopefully, this is the last step! Because of his diabetes, the CG seems to make things harder for him. I understand that they have to verify he is fit enough to be in charge of large vessels and many other lives are at risk with him behind the wheel, but sometimes I just want to scream! When the CC required more tests, James can't be on the boat to see doctors. This means his 2 weeks home this time were spent with lots of doctors.

He had gotten clearance from the Opthamologist and Internal Medicine doctors the week before. Monday was the Cardiologist. He had to have a stress test. We drove to Pine Bluff and his test started at 8 AM. I left him there after a little over an hour and skipped over to my OB/GYN for my 36 week check :) I checked out fine with no complications and dilated to a 1 :) Not much and you can stay at a 1 for weeks, but I keep thinking that is 1 less to go once labor starts, haha! I went back to James who still had about an hour and a half left of testing. I sat in the waiting room with the other stress test patients and James when he was between rooms just visiting with everyone and the nurses. As he went in for the last test, the radiology tech (I assume since I didn't ask) asked me if I was expecting. As if it isn't totally obvious at 8 months! She choose to inform me then, after all this time with the patients, that the building wasn't radioactive, but every patient doing the stress test (including my hubby) was! I should be more than 10 to 15 feet away from them. Hello! I think it is too late now... not to mention James and I drove to Pine Bluff together in the same vehicle which means we had to return the same way! She said everything should be fine, but we needed to put distance between us as soon as possible. I went out front where the non-radioactive people were located for the last 15 minutes. Then they tell us that they can only give the results of the test to James himself, who is leaving Tuesday! We had to hang around PB until 1:00 and return for the results. Great. We just goofed off for 1 1/2 hours until we had to return. The doctor said there was a slight abnormality, but he wasn't concerned at all. If it was up to the doctor alone he would pass James with no problems, BUT the CC would just kick it out and say he had to prove it was fine. Therefore, when he comes back and a couple days after the baby arrives, he has to go back to the Cardiologist for a CT scan. Yuck!

We left PB about 3 and headed home. KL was at the park with Amanda. I then remembered that I forgot to call the dentist about her tooth. We dropped James off at home so that we could be "more than 10 feet apart" after the 8 hours we were already together. By the way, the radioactive stuff they gave him has a half-life of 6 hours. This means I already was exposed to the worst of it :( It was 4:15 by the time KL and I got to the dentist. We talked to his assistant who agreed (without looking) more than likely it was the same tooth and we could bring her in Tuesday morning they could just pull it.

Tuesday was James scheduled day to head back to the boat. We got up that morning and decided not to take KL to school since we would have to go pick her back up 2 hours later for the dentist. James ran to get his insulin refilled and run by the bank for some cash before he left. Of course, nothing is EVER simple around here. The ATM ate the money. It was raining and he wasn't exactly happy about this. He went inside to tell them the ATM ate the money and he needed it before leaving town. The lady told him he would have to wait until this afternoon when the ATM was balanced. He had to explain that he understood it was raining, but he was leaving before this afternoon and someone had to do it before then. They told him they would call when it was straightened out. He came and got KL and I and we went to the dentist. While we were waiting there, James went to get his hair cut, got a call from the bank and went to pick up the money, and then met us back at the dentist. When the dentist looked at her tooth, there were no signs of infection in the previously infected tooth. He showed me too and there was no swelling or redness. Her molar is coming in and there was a particle of food next to her gum line at the very back that may have been causing a little pain. He irrigated it and explained the importance of getting way back to that new tooth when brushing. We should be fine now and luckily no major dental work needed :) We left the dentist and headed to Greenville to pick up the rental car for James trip back to the boat. We got home about 3 that afternoon. James loaded up and hit the road about 4.

It is always just a sad day when James has to head back to the boat. Luckily, Tuesday evenings are ball practice for KL. We had enough time to get some supper and head to the ball field. She is tired and it is late when we get back from practice on Tuesdays so she went to bed without the usually "Daddy just left can I sleep with you?" fuss.

Wednesday morning, I had all intentions of getting caught up on the dirty clothes and dusting. After taking KL to school, I just couldn't get motivated. I had not been home since Saturday for more than a few minutes at a time and I guess it all caught up to me. I played around on the computer for too long and ended up taking a nice long nap :) Guess with the pregnancy it was just much needed. When I got KL from school, she told me that her mouth was still hurting. She told her teacher during reading time and was told "we are getting off task". I said, let me look... thinking I would see nothing, we would rinse with salt water and she would be fine. There was a huge sore on the side of her gum next to the tooth that was infected in December. I immediately loaded her up and headed back to the dentist. He asked her questions about how it was hurting before he ever looked in her mouth. She tried to explain, but it is hard for a 7 year old to explain pain when they don't have a lot of background with pain. I wanted to tell him to just LOOK and the problem would be obvious, but held my tongue. When he finally looked, he said if he had not looked yesterday, he wouldn't believe it did that over one day. I told him I agreed, but it was bad now. Needless to say, she experienced her first tooth pulling at the dentist. She did really well, but I was so angry with her teacher for not even glancing at her mouth knowing she missed the day of school before because of a tooth problem and the dentist. My baby hurt all day for nothing :(

Thursday I decided to keep her home from school because I didn't trust the teacher to call if the pain started. I was glad I did. It stormed all morning and KL didn't get off the couch until late yesterday afternoon. For those with kids, you know if they are laying around on the couch and not playing they don't feel good! She did try to play the Wii about 10:00 and lasted about 5 minutes before throwing a little fit. I told her she just wasn't up to the activity yet and needed to turn it off. I did get my cleaning done, but didn't get all the clothes washed. Craig and Amanda came over for supper about 7:00. We like getting together on Thursday nights for supper so we can watch Gray's Anatomy and Private Practice, but they were reruns. We decided to watch Marley and Me instead. It was ok, but I wouldn't watch it again.

Now we are to today... Friday! Yay!!! Clothes, clothes, and more clothes! In the last week I have washed a couple loads instead of my usual at LEAST one load a day (when it is just me and KL). With James being home during part of this time and having KL's old baby clothes from the attic to sort and wash, I have a FULL day of nothing but laundry! KL tried to play the tooth card again this morning, but she did so well late yesterday and last night I knew she really was okay to go to school. I did, however, take her in and had a little talk with her teacher about the importance of listening when she complains and how I expect to be called if she has any problems today.

KL's Nana (James' mom) called wanting to see her tonight, so after school she will spend the night with Nana... unless she refuses to go again. As of on the ride to school, she agreed to go. It would really be helpful if she would. Maybe I will have more time to figure out this blog business, haha! I know this first blog is probably just long and boring, but hopefully it will get better soon :)