all the memories surface up suddenly.

there are just too many familiar places around in school...

why am i still keeping a lookout for you? why do i fear of bumping into you? are the feelings stilll not dead yet?

*kit-bird kills it.

a new semester starts tomorrow. a fresh start. supposed to have a race this morning, but my team got disqualified because 2 riders came late. oh well. i've to admit i feel damn fucked up, disappointed and sad, but i guess things like this do happen. there's nothing i can do. they are ma good pals.

every failure or crash if just a test to make us stronger. everything happens for a reason and for the best of it.

i'll train harder for tomorrow.

听见 冬天的离开 我在某年某月 醒过来
我想 我等 我期待 未来却不能因此安排
阴天 傍晚 车窗外 未来有一个人在等待
向左 向右 向前看 爱要拐几个弯才来
我遇见谁 会有怎样的对白 我等的人 他在多远的未来
我听见风 来自地铁和人海 我排着队 拿着爱的号码牌
我往前飞 飞过一片时间海 我们也常在爱情里受伤害
我看着路 梦的入口有点窄 我遇见你是最美的意外
终有一天 我的谜底会解开

i still remember this song.

i kept telling myself that life is better than before. im better off now before than ever. if it didnt happen i wouldnt be what im today. no race results, no red/white jersey hanging on the walls. why is it still haunting me after so long?

they say it's all part of growing up.

everything happens for a reason and for the best of it.

no idea why suddenly i decided to check out some of my older blog entires, and i came across this.

everytime i decided to go to bed, i'll end up crying again. it hurts me to know that we are not together anymore. i'll think of the days we spent our lives today, from our first date we went to jurong point before your tuition, when i proposed to you at the airport, going to the beach, the first time i bought you flowers, climbing bukit timah hill together...

looking back, i feel like laughing at myself for being so foolish, but yet again, that hurtful feeling crawls back into where it came from. i've no idea how i managed to write so much back then. i must be a madman. haha.

don't think too much, bird...

have to wake up at 0400 later for desaru ride but im still awake. couldnt sleep. i guess sleepless nights are the best for blogging.

life has been good. i've finally been carded by ssc as a b2 athlete, which means as long as i maintain at the level or hopefully improve more, i'll have no worries about ns in a couple of years to come. started on my advance theory lessons, ftt on 1/7, first practical lesson starts on 20/7. time table has been out, so tentatively i've booked 2 lessons on tuesdays, and maybe one more on wed before school. all for that hopefully i'll get my driving license by october/november. no hurry.

has been okay. no more getting emotional or feeling down. guess im all alright already. maybe it's time to settle down when the right one comes.

dad wish to buy me a bike, probably get him fork out about 3k. get a carbon frame plus dura ace 10spd or ultegra components, depends on how expensive the frame/fork is. damn. i can really cum just by looking at the da 10spd cranks. argh. just now i was lying in the bed thinking about this cool black carbon frame with da 10spd. woohoo.

am undertaking this research study on powertap by ssc. going for labtests next friday, doing max vo2 tests etc, and another week doing 3 times time trial at coastal, and another week doing climbing test. this will help me understand more about sports science, my power output, max vo2, and other science invovles. im a scientist as well, probably not a sports scientist, but still... heh. moreover, we get 300 bucks each after the research. more funds added to 'buy kit a new bike' fund. heh.

tomorrow doing a desaru ride, hopefully can hit 160km. i must sleep soon. oh well.