Gluten Again...

I'm starting to think that Gluten is the new four letter word in our house.  It has been 5 months since I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease.  It has absolutely NOT been an easy road, but I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of certain aspects of my new life.  Initially I dropped 17 pounds in three weeks because I was so terrified to eat anything for fear that it would make me sick.  Though even after I quit eating wheat- I was still getting stomachaches and it took me a while to locate the reason for still feeling crummy... Eventually I was able to pinpoint the reason for my continued intestinal distress... DAIRY!  Apparently I am also now lactose intolerant.  It was kind of like hitting a brick wall.  It seemed like everything that I had been doing for years was exactly what was hurting my body.  How do you change so many habits and foods?  And how do you do that when you have a family to feed and take care of too?

I was coming up blank.  And really, really struggling.  Sometimes I would try to cheat- almost like I was trying to prove to myself that the diagnosis was wrong and that I really could still eat my favorite foods.  Every time I ended up on the bathroom floor, holding onto my stomach and waiting for the cramps to pass.  Every single time.  I was so miserable.  I told everyone that I was handling the situation fine and that it wasn't such a big deal... I was totally lying.

Thankfully though- I have the world's most incredible husband.  And I'm not talking about a cutesy husband- you know the one you read about on your friend's blog- the guy that is SUPER amazing because he cleans the house and takes the kids on long walks so you can take a nap or even the one that brings home flowers.  Nope.  I have a better husband.  Mine stood by me while I cried about missing pizza (of all the stupid things to cry about right?) and he ate crappy meal after crappy meal- he'd even ask for seconds.  He helped me find local cooking classes that offered courses in Gluten Free baking and cooking... and he ate crummy brownies, leaden rolls and cookies that turned to dust after you bit into them.  He praised me when I did get a recipe right and offered suggestions when they didn't.  He has trailed behind me in health food stores, helping me look for new and strange ingredients to add to our growingy Gluten Free pantry.  He has even stood up for me and my diagnoses when others didn't understand what it has truly meant for us.  In short- he has been the most patient and understanding man- and I love him dearly.

My mom and my dad have also been instrumental in helping me figure this all out.  My mom has attended almost every single one of my cooking classes with me.  She has helped me find stores that carried things like Sorghum Flour and Xanthan Gum.  She too has helped offer suggestions for fixing meals that don't hurt me and still feed my family.  Though- we would be lost without the help of a wonderful baker here in the area- Trish Withus has been an inspiration to me and has helped me master G-Free Chocolate Chip cookies!

It seems that even though we've gotten over a couple of bumps in the road since I was diagnosed- we aren't set for smooth sailing just yet.  You see- Ty has been getting migraine headaches since school started back in September.  When he first started getting them- I kind of blew it off and blamed it on the fact that he probably would rather stay home and watch movies than go to school- even though I knew how much he looked forward to school each day.  But the headaches seemed to get worse and more frequent as the school year went on.  He missed days at a time and would spent them down in his room in the dark.  He wouldn't eat anything and he didn't want to do anything.  I finally brought it up with his Doctor and we tried a few different things before she had him (and the other two kids) brought down to the lab to have blood tested for certain antibodies.

When she called me with the results she told me that she had some "interesting" results to the tests.  My heart dropped- "interesting" is not boring- and boring would have been that all the tests came back normal and that would be it.  But no.  "Interesting."  She told me that the antibody count in a normal, healthy person is 4.  Ty's antibody count was over 100.  The lab stopped counting at 100.  He really was a sick little boy- I couldn't help but wonder how long I had actually missed this...

Ryan's labs came back perfect and Kate's were "inconclusive" and she'll be tested again in about 6 months, but the chances are very good that she also has Celiac.

Before the Dr can actually officially diagnose someone with Celiac- you have to go in to a gastroenterologist and have an endoscopy.  This is where they put a tube down your throat,take a few pictures and take a biopsy to be tested in the lab.  They take the biopsy to rule out cancers and other internal problems that could be the cause of the high antibody count- but because of the family history including Celiac, the Dr thinks that Ty most likely has it as well.

We go in on Wednesday for Ty's endoscopy.

I have mixed emotions on all of this.  Do I want Ty to get better?  Without question.  But a life of Celiac when you start so young?  It will be so hard on him.  While knowledge is slowly seeping into the general public about people with wheat intolerance- it's not like there are always two birthday cakes at a party- one  that is G-Free and one that is full wheat.  And it breaks my heart to think about Ty eating a sucker at school while everyone else eats donuts.  Is this a healthier way of life?  Absolutely.  Is it harder?  Without question. But how crappy is that to throw on a 6 year old?  I have to take away his most favorite food in the world...  what is he going to do without a bean and cheese burrito!?!?  I know this is taking the "glass half empty" position- which I generally try to stay away from.  The pragmatic side of me is saying how much better his quality of life will be when he isn't plagued with tummy troubles and migraines.  But it's still so hard to take away things that your child loves.  Think about it- what is something your little ones love- can you imagine taking it away and saying you can never have it again?  It's hard.  I know it's for the best, and the reality is that there are so much bigger problems out there for a kid to have.  But it's hard.

Anyway- I don't know if this is exactly the right forum to write all this down in, but I figure if I ever get all of these posts printed out into a book- maybe we'll want to look back at where it all began so we can see how far we've come.  Maybe in 15 years when we read it, Ty and I will laugh at how silly it all was to worry so much.  And maybe I'll have learned how stupid it is to sabotage my body for the sake of a french fry.

President's Day Weekend

As you may or may not know- every year my family goes to Bear Lake for President's Day weekend.  I can't really remember a time when we didn't.  When we were younger- it was all about sledding and playing around in the snow.  As we've gotten older- my dad totally spoils us and takes all the adults (except for Grandma- who says she'd rather hang out with her grandkids) up to Beaver Mountain Lodge and rents snowmobiles for a day!  It's so much fun!  I love snowmobiling!  And the best part- EVERY single one of us were able to go this year.  No one was pregnant or moving...  It was awesome!  And- we only had a few minor setbacks during the day... Dad buried his sled up to the seat during one of his daring hill climbs, Shaun got stuck trying to help him and Dave lost his sled during his rescue effort.  Miss, Jer, Nat and I laughed at them- we were the super helpful ones can you tell??  I also got stuck- but my cute husband saved my turkey- thanks Shaun.  And a SUPER BIG THANKS to my dad!!

The rest of the weekend we spent playing cards, watching movies and sledding.  You can see why I look forward to this every year!

Dave and Cam..

 Nat and Cam...

 Cam...

 Kate...

 Ty... Ty actually was really pretty crazy out sledding.  My parents' cabin is on a pretty big hill and Ty climbed higher and higher each time he went!

 Me and my kiddos...

 Grandpa and Ryan... Ryan was a little leery (as he always is) and had to have some help at first.

 But once he got the hang of it- no one could stop him.  And he just looked so stinkin' cute on his little green sled.  The green ones spun circles as you went down- so they were totally nutso- can you guess which ones the boys liked the best???

 Kate did not like sledding.  But I talked her into it for about three runs.  Then she was done and only wanted to hang out with Grandpa.

 Naturally Grandpa humored her!

Ballet Shoes

Back when I was teaching Ballet in Montpelier, I was able to order Ballet apparel for cost.  I sold shoes and skirts to a lot of the girls that were dancing with me.  Once in a while I would order a size that ended up not fitting the girl it was ordered for- one such instance was for a little 3 year old who was very tiny.  And her shoes ended up not fitting- but instead of sending them back to the wholesaler- I kept them with the intention of passing them on to Kate when she got a little bigger (you have to remember that she was only about 6 months at the time).  I pulled them out a couple of weeks ago for my baby girl- and I haven't been able to get them off of her since.  She LOVES them!  I don't know if they are super comfortable or what- but she insists on wearing them most days- maybe it has something to do with the fact that she doesn't have to wear socks...  Yeah- Kate hates socks.  Of all the weird things to hate- Kate hates socks.  

 Whatever the reason- I don't really care.  She looks super cute in them.

Junior Jazz

Living in the city has provided us with some new opportunities for our kids.  One of them is junior jazz basketball for Tyler.  Soccer was about the only thing that was available for kids Ty's age up in Montpelier, so the fact that he finally got to go and play basketball with kids his own age was beyond exciting for him.  And since he's so big- he actually did quite well!  

Ty is really tall for his age and then you add in the fact that we held him back a year in school- and he literally towers over the other kids out there on the floor.  Not that he minds.  He loves the fact that he can shoot over the other kids and block most of their shots.  

The other added benefit that we didn't forsee to letting him play basketball- was his renewed interest in all things sports.  He now loves to sit and watch TV with his dad, as long as something with a ball is on.  In fact, I will catch him watching re-runs of old college games on ESPN Classic- he sits and critiques the players and their game.  It's hilarious.  

Grandpa JB has also been taking him to the U of U basketball games- and he loves it!  Ryan does too- I will sit and listen to them play by themselves- and Ryan is always "Jiggy" and Ty is "Watkins"... both real players on the Utes team... and on it goes.  I love it!

It's Finally Here! Christmas 2011!

Christmas morning came early at the Kidd house (as well it should- Christmas is NOT a day for sleeping in!).  We were all up and ready to go by 7.  

Kate got a new baby doll from Santa this year.  The baby has a magnet in her mouth so her binky and her bottle stay put.  Kate loved it!  She spent all morning lugging "baby" around trying to feed her and rock her to sleep.

 The boys did indeed get their StarWars space ship, along with an AT-AT walker (or a poo-pooer in layman's terms) and a snow speeder.  I'm a little embarrassed that I know exactly what each one of those are- but I would be a bad mom if I didn't have a working knowledge of what my kids know and love.  They were sooo excited!

 Cousin Deja got a small 4 wheeler that both of the girls liked to sit in.  It was cute!

 And Christmas fell on a Sunday this year- which I LOVE!  I love having the morning with your family and then the afternoon in worship.  I love that you are almost instantly reminded of what the season is about and why we celebrate Christmas.  I am so grateful for my family and the chance that I have to live with them forever.  I am so grateful for my Saviour, and for the fact that He made it possible for us always to be together.  I know that He is always watching out for us and that He loves us.

Christmas Eve

This year, we celebrated Christmas in Declo with Shaun's parents, his brothers, their wives and their kids.  Our crew is getting pretty big now- it's so much fun!  

Christmas Eve was really fun- we made pizzas for dinner.  Which the boys loved doing- they got to make their own and put on it whatever they wanted.  For some reason they were super excited about that part- even though they only like cheese on their pizza.  I guess it was really really fun to lay out the cheese exactly the way they wanted it.  

 We also made some sugar cookies for the kids to decorate before they went to bed.  These are the cookies they left out for Santa- so they HAD to be good!  Jacki was nice enough to let me take over her kitchen again so that I could make some gluten free sugar cookies.  We had toyed with the idea of just making regular ones- but really- I couldn't pass up the opportunity for cookies!  I mean come on!  Christmas cookies are one of the best parts of Christmas eve!

 We made Christmas trees, circles and stars and lots of frosting!

 And... were they good!?  Ty thought so!  Me too actually.  These particular cookies were the result of a lot of trial and error in the kitchen during the month of December.  I threw away more batches than I care to admit.  When baking G-Free, you can't just substitute one cup of rice flour for one cup of wheat flour- you have to mix different types of flour in order to get the taste and texture that you want.  I have been taking a lot of classes on re-learning how to cook and bake so that I am not getting sick any more- and it's been rough.  But like I said- I finally found a recipe that didn't fall apart in my mouth and actually tasted like a cookie.  My family thought they were good and that's good enough for me!

Christmas Traditions

One of my favorite things about December is going down to Temple Square to see the lights on the Temple grounds.  There is just nothing like it- and the people that actually put up all the lights are my heros- because it literally makes the most incredible sight.  I loved it when I was a kid and now that I have my own to bring, I love watching their faces light up when they see the lights too.  

It was freezing- so we are bundled up to the hilt!

 My mom and dad came with us- which was fun.  The kids love spending ANY time with their grandparents!

 I'm getting a little better at taking pictures at night... I wish I could capture how beautiful it is to look across the pond at the Nativity with the lights in the background and as a reflection... but you'll just have to kind of imagine it from the picture I took.  I also love that my boys ask a zillion questions about Christ's birth when we are down here.  Ty wanted to know EVERYTHING about it.  I was grateful to have Shaun's help to field some of the questions since they came about every two seconds.  Shaun and Ty have a relationship that struggles sometimes, but when Ty has a lot of questions about something he always goes to his dad.

 Kate was just happy to be out of the house.  She loves to "go go" anywhere!

 After we saw the lights, we went to read the Christmas story.  Every year there is a cul de sac/ circle over by Westminster College that puts up lights and huge posters of the Christmas story in their front yards.  So cars line up at the beginning of the circle and can read the story from their cars.  I remember doing this as a kid- we'd all take turns reading a board- and I can remember Dave and I trying to skip Melissa.  She'd scream and my mom and dad would get mad at us- and Dave and I would just laugh.  It's funny what you remember.

I was so impressed that Ty could read right along with us this year.  These signs are written with the actual Biblical text- which isn't easy reading for a lot of adults- but he read like he was 12.

The Big Man Himself

Each year we have a Christmas part with my extended family on the Newren side, and each year SANTA makes an appearance to check on the little boys and girls to make sure that they are being good.  Each year the kids' reaction has been different.  Half of them are excited and the other half is screaming in terror.  Good times really.  

 I love the look on Ty's face here- he is so full of excitement and a little bit of anxiety as he waited for his turn to sit on Santa's lap...

 Kate hated Santa and only sat on his lap long enough for me to snap a picture.  She ran back to Grandpa and sat with him until the bearded man had left the building.  She wouldn't even go near him to get her present.

 Ryan was a little leery- but still proceeded to sit on Santa's lap.  He very quietly asked for a Star Wars Spaceship and a helicopter.  Yeah.  That's right.  A helicopter.  Why did he change his mind two days before Christmas?  Because he's Ryan.

 Ty was the very last one to sit on Santa's lap this year.  He waited very patiently (and let's be truthful here- I think he was a little afraid- not getting presents when everyone else does is like fear in it's most primal form), and was very polite when talking to Santa.

In all, we had a great time.  It was the first one with out my grandpa, but I knew he was there in spirit.

The Elf Returns...

I don't know how many of you paid attention last year when the Elf on the Shelf was new to us- but the Elf returned this December to remind our little ones to be good.  Ernie somehow ended up with a helper this year- a little reindeer named Ed.  He joined our little family one day when Ryan brought him home from school.  For some reason, Ryan had it in his head that Ernie needed a helper and this reindeer was IT!  So- Ed entered our home and has been a menace ever since.  He's pretty mischievous- Ernie has to take him to task every once in a while because of it.  One day, Ed made snow angels on our kitchen table and the next day taped up snowflakes in our living room.  The boys loved him and were happy to see that Ed finally talked Ernie into relaxing in a marshmallow bath.  

Ryan's Christmas Program

Ryan is currently enrolled in the BEST preschool program ever!  I love the curriculum at his school and how involved and sweet his teachers are.  The school had put together a Christmas program for the parents and I was so excited to go and watch.  I was hoping that Ryan would be a little bit more outgoing and active in his program this time around- since he simply sat there like a bump on a log for their Halloween program.  

He didn't disappoint!  While he wasn't stoked to be there (because really- he NEVER is), he sang his little heart out and helped Miss Tammy with the bells when she asked him to.  

Letters to Santa

While I was making dinner about a week before Christmas, Ty decided it was time to sit down and write a letter to Santa.  Because he is our big Kindergartner this year- he had to write it all by himself.  He rose to the challenge magnificently!  He carefully crafted a letter to the man up north about how good he and his brother and sister had been and that he hoped the reindeer were getting along.  He proceeded to ask for a Star Wars space ship (yes- the boys are still OBSESSED with Star Wars) for he and Ryan and a baby for Kate.  Baby doll actually- I should clarify...  :)  Then he signed and sealed it and left it on the tree for Ernie (our Elf of the Shelf) to take to Santa that night.  He was pretty proud of himself- and actually- so was I.  I'm really really impressed at how well Tyler is doing in school and how much he is learning.  He is such a smart little cookie! 

 We had spaghetti for dinner that night and Ryan was a SUPER slowpoke!  So Kate climbed up on the chair next to him and helped him out with his salad.  Of all the things for a one year old to love and Kate loves salad. I think it's a little weird myself, but I guess it's good for her so I shouldn't complain!

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas

It was that time of year again.  Thanksgiving was over and done with, and it was time to bring on Christmas... One of my FAVORITE holidays!  As much as I am hating to see my kids' baby years over and done with- I am starting to see how much fun they are as little kids now.  They are totally into holidays and decorations and anything that I am excited about- transfers over to them.  

One of the first things we did after we got the tree up was pull out our Nativity.  Last year I cringed as I brought my beautiful Nativity down where my kids could see and touch- mostly because I wanted it to be in the forefront of their minds as they passed through the living room.  Maybe helping the message to sink in... maybe...  I don't know- I figured it was worth a shot.  BUT!  I got smarter this year and bought them a Little People Nativity.  Way smarter.  Not only was it no big deal to leave it down on the ground by the tree, but the kids got to play with them and act out the story themselves.  Like I said... way smarter! 

 The kids were really cute this year- Shaun and I walked them through the Nativity story a couple of times, and after that, I could hear Ty and Ryan arguing over how the story went as they tried to act it out.  Kate just wanted to eat the angel.  Poor thing.  Our angels suffer at our house.  Last year it was a "bug" and this year it's a snack.  I guess we'll have to work on that next year...