Our children have unionized. This morning Jensen presented Ken and I with a piece of paper with the following written on it:
"Jensen will not do more than 5 chores a day. This bill is the request of chores. It is fine."
She had drawn three lines on the bottom and had already signed one. I asked what qualified as a chore, and we agreed that my asking her to get a diaper or something simple did not qualify as a chore. Then I signed it. She left the room for a moment and returned with the 5 crossed out and replaced with a 3. I told her it was not acceptable to change a contract after it has been signed. So she left the room again and returned with the contract rewritten as such:
"Jensen and Zaddock will not do more than 4 chores a day. This bill is a request of chores. Little requests count as a 1/12 of a chore."
Again signed by Jensen, this time with four lines to sign (one for Zaddock, because by this point I think she wanted to make sure he was required to do some chores, too). Ken, who’d been pretty quiet up until now, decided to add some requests of his own to the bottom of the contract:
"Jensen will perform 5 chores a day as a contributing member of the Katschke family. Jensen will receive $.25 for every chore above the 5 contracted."
Jensen was a little shocked by this turn of events. Then Ken started to suggest that the number of required chores be based on ones age. At this point Labor (as Jensen will now be know) walked out of negotiations, perceiving it as unfair that she do more chores than anyone else. With a little persuasion the Arbitrator (me) convinced Labor to make a counter offer to Management (Ken). Labor countered with 4 required chores at $.10 each . Management countered with 4 non-paid chores with additional optional chores paid at $.20 each. Labor balked at the non-paid chore requirement and decided to go on strike. Things got ugly when Management said if a strike ensued they would start charging for room and board at a rate of $.10 per day for each service.
It looked like a lost cause until the Arbitrator stepped in. There were a few tense moments when Zaddock tried to sign the contract as "Lego Star Wars", and another when Labor asked to be paid in rubies (and with the weak showing of the dollar lately who can blame them). Eventually we were able to walk through each issue and come up with an acceptable contract to all sides. Jensen wrote up the final contract which reads thus:
"Jensen and Zaddock will perform the following 3 chores for free: 1) sweeping floors, 2) room tidy, 3) setting/clearing the table. Additional chores over the three required are paid at $.20 each up to a ($1) dollar a day. Small little request are worth 1/12 of a chore. It is the responsibility of the chore doer to keep track of the small requests to earn money. On a chore doer’s birthday they do not have to do the chores.
This bill expires on 4/30/08 and starts on 3/10/08."
So the Katschke household should be operating smoothly until the current contract runs out at the end of April.
8 years ago