My Digital World

My brother Kar Loong bought an apple-pie for me, because of my Bachelor degree. That is very nice of him and it is my first time that I say thank you to him. That apple-pie tastes very good. On the box, it is said that is the world's famous one. Hahaha, suddenly I think about Shan Shan because she likes food very much. Yesterday she sent me an e-mail and again, it is a very funny e-mail.

She wonders why I am still unattached. I also don't know why I am still single. But I also don't know why I should be attached. Not everyone has 副喜 to find his/her lover. I am not engaged in finding my lover or whatever. Things that will come, will come. Things that will go, will go. Indeed, I have to grab my chance when it comes since I know that chance is very rare and might be the only chance.

Yesterday, Yan asks me what my ideal girl should be. It doesn't really matter how my 'girl' is. As long as we can talk, laugh and be happy together, then I am very satisfied. It is weird that lately I am confronted with love matter stuff. People around me may think it is time for me to find my other part since I am old. When I look into the mirror I notice that I have some "white" hair which indicates that I am not a boy anymore.

I think I am changed after the operation last year. Now every true friends of me are equal. And I usually don't take the initiative to do something. Also I get along with other friends. I used to talk on the phone which is now very seldom. Sometimes I call some friends to have a chat. But nowadays people seem so busy.

Today, I receive my Bachelor of Science diploma. I have waited for this diploma for a year since there is only 1 course that I need to pass. And finally, in this summer I pass for that exam.

At today's ceremony, there are many people from my year who receive their Bachelor. I only took some pics. Below you can see how the sphere was.


I start with a picture of professor Beenakker. He is the head of the department of DIMES (Delft Institute of Microelectronics and Submicrontechnology). At Mark's thesis presentation, Beenakker was also present since he was one of the guys who would determine the score. After my distribution, Beenakker got into a talk with me, which surprised me. I am not a member of DIMES. How does he know me? Maybe he remembers my face at Mark's presentation and being present at the time when I did "solid state materials" course of professor Crans, where I tried to answer his questions all the time.

Now here is the pic of the happy ones who receive his/her diploma.

How do I feel at that moment? Well, just nothing special. Getting my Bachelor degree is a sign of a step further in my life. My plan is starting my Master thesis this summer. I like to do that in Asia, especially in Singapore. But let me see how my exams in the Master go first.

Today's greatest highlights are that my mother, cousin and two friends are presenting. They are my very good friends who I can talk, laugh and hanging around everywhere. Here is the pic of my family:

The little girl in front of my mother is Jennifer. She is the girl who my mom takes care of. It is a bit pity that Lili was not present. Lili is also a girl who my mom has been taken care of. People in Groningen thought that she was my daugther because they always see me with this little girl hanging around in the town and feeding ducks.

Following are the pics with my two friends. The first one is Siu Mei.

When she leaves, she asks me to company her when her boyfriend (Jok) is in overseas for conference. Because of Siu Mei, I dress today a bit decently. Else I will go to the ceremony with my casual dress. I like dressing decently, but since I don't think that my Bachelor is something special, so I would like to dress casual.

Now here is Celeste!

I am glad to see her. She took the most shots of me today. Yesterday, she just comes back to Holland for the distribution of her sister, me and another friend of her. It is a great pity that I cannot talk to her that much in these few days since we live too far from each other and she has already been "booked" with the appointments with her friends. When we say goodbye to each other, she asks me (again) when I would visit her in Spain. I would like to visit, but let me see if my schedule allows. Because I have made appointment with my profs. However I will visit her.

I am crazy of the amount of phonecalls I have today. My relatives call me again for help. The first one is my cousin who asks for advising to buy a mouse. The second one is my aunt. She is starting with a cafetaria. She asks me to design a logo that she will use as their image of their cafetaria. I cannot say no to her since my uncle (her husband) is very nice to us. Because of my uncle I do so many things for her.

Well, my aunt sends me a link with the kind of logo she likes to use. She mentions to adjust some small changes in the design and if I like I can change the whole design. Since all pics from the internet have their copyright and since they are used for commercial purposes, it is very sensible to create one (by myself). Although I have to face to my books (study), I start with designing the logo. This is finally my design:


When I send this logo to my aunt, she immediately says that it is very ugly and ask me to redo. She wants to have the logo that she mentions about on the phone. I have to copy the logo and adjust small changes in the message in the dialogbox plus some small changes in other stuff. Here you can see the orignal one follows by the one I adjust:



I really don't like the logo that she likes. First, it is nothing more than a copy. Second, it is copyright protected and so it is sensible to not use it. Third, the logo is too childish. My design is also childish. I do that because I thought that my aunt will like the childish style. Fourth, somehow I don't feel very happy to hear the 'way' how my aunt talks to me on the phone. It is not because she dislikes my logo (my logo might be "ugly" and I am not the person who know her taste, and taste differs from person to person). But it is the "careless" reaction she shows to me on the phone. I mean, it seems that I need to standby for her all the time: she assumes that I will work on the logo next week because she thinks that I have vacation. Also, she always thinks that her thing is the most important, no matter how busy I am. With other words, I don't have the feeling she will care of others. I never forget the moments she forces me to help her with her troubles at the time when I fight for my last and the biggest Bachelor-project two years ago. Also, every time when I complete my task, she rarely thanks me.

Some of my friends know the fact that I don't like my aunt very much. From all these years, I get used of the way she is. But sometimes I am really mad at her. But I will rarely show my emotion since I am not the person who likes to express my feeling. But people who know me well, may know that there is something wrong with me when I get mad. My good friend Fung never understands why I cannot say "No!" to my aunt. But there are many things involved which is very hard for me to say NO to her for the things she asks me to do.

I like helping people, but there are some people who I do not like to help. Some of them make me very tired. And some of them make me very happy because I can give them my support.

Now my mood for doing something meaningful is completely gone. But fortunately, I have talked to someone who I send the E-card. Although the chat is very short, I am glad to the chance to talk to her. She hasn't checked her e-mail yet. So, she still doesn't not receive the E-card.

This week is amost over. Next week, it is a week off for studying. Also, this Friday, I receive my Bsc-diploma. Patsy says she likes to come. And I have to remind Siu Mei for getting the diploma, else she will be mad at me.

This week I come very late (after midnight) to my room (Rotterdam). It is because I have 2 appointments with my friends. The first appointment is in Amsterdam. We ate at the Bazar and we took pics of each other. At that day I didn't bring my camera with me since I already have many things to take with me to the Nuclear Institute. Anyway, the second appointment is with my two friends who are couple. I know them for a very long time too (around 7 years), especially Siu Mei (the girl). I know her boyfriend (Jok) via her. Jok called me this week to invite me to go to his appartment with his girlfriend to have a great dinner. He cooks for me which is very nice of him. After the dinner I talk to him about doing PhD and searching for jobs. Siu Mei brings me to the trainstation when I leave for Rotterdam. While we are walking she says that I should visit her and her boyfriend regularly. Also she says that I can stay at their appartment when Jok goes to oversea which I have to laugh. Siu Mei is good friend of me. She always sends me nice cards at my birthday which I appreciate it very much.

This week, serveral people ask me for doing their favor. I am surprised that people notice that I took pictures without showing my camera and seeing my pics. Maybe there is a text printed in my head which lets everybody know that I take pics. However, I am very glad to allow to do their favor. One of the things is about taking pictures of students and professors of the 15th floor of the electrical, maths and computer building (EWI-building). I am told by one of the students that a professor is suffering of lung-cancer and he and other students want to take pics of all the people of the 15th floor (computer department) to give the professor as a gift and support and with the hope that he will recover! And I am the lucky one who they ask for help. My first reaction is very shocking when I hear that the professor suffer of this serious illness altough I do not know him. If I can make him feel better with my pics, I will do my best to make the best shots, to make him feel much and much better.

This Friday, there is the first event organised by Frank and his students. Frank is a mentor as I am. At that event I took many pics. Those pics can be found at the forum. But here there are some shots shared.
#1

#2

#3

#4

#5

#6

#7

#8


Frank is at pic #5. He has a baby blue shirt and he is the guy on the right. At that event, students get free drink for the first round. There is also a quiz that they can do. For each good answer they give, they will get a drink free. I enjoy his event and I am glad to see many students be present. Some of my students come too which makes me feel happier.

Today, I have created a self-made E-card to a friend/very far relative of me since it is her birthday. I want to add a song at the E-card that reminds me of her. But since I have to rush I am not able to do that. This is the song that reminds me of her:

我知道傷心不能改變甚麼 那麼 讓我誠實一點
誠實 難免有不能控制的宣洩 只要關上了門不必理誰

#一個人坐在空蕩包廂裡面 手機 讓它休息一夜
難 像切歌切掉回憶的畫面 眼淚不能流過十二點

*生日快樂 我對自己說 蠟燭點了 寂寞亮了
生日快樂 淚也融了 我要謝謝你給的你拿走的一切

@還愛你帶一點恨 還要時間 才能平衡
熱戀傷痕 幻滅重生 祝我生日快樂

Repeat #*@@


Hopefully she likes the Ecard that I made by myself and the sms I send to her.

The last thing I like to write is about Celeste. I am surprised by the amount of smsjes she sends to me today. I want to thank her for her concern of me. Now she is in Spain. Also another friend (Stephanie) is currently in oversea. People come and people leave...

It is my first time that my friend cries on the phone. I used to talk alot to many friends about their problems. Most of the problems are relationship related. But this time, it is different. From her call, I know that my friend achieves me as a very good friend. She also understands that I am serious about the matter I always tell my true friends: "I will always standby for you!" No matter what time or when they call me, as long as they need me, I will always be there.

I am not a person who can someone cheer up. In contrast I have no any clue how to do. The only I can offer, is the thing they like to have. The friends who talked to me may know what my offer is.

I was in Amsterdam last Wednesday for a meeting with my friends who I know from Singapore. That day I took the present for a friend, Airin, with me the whole day. It is a canvas and its size is 40cm x 60cm. Some of her selected pictures that I took of her are printed on the canvas. It is a gift for her birthday and I am glad to hear that she likes it. Thanks the help of my buddy, I have chosen the correct photos. When I carry the canvas in a very big box and when Airin starts to ask me about that, my buddy Nancy knows the way to get Airin's attention.

That Wednesday-evening seems be very short! We have had a Japanese buffet and after that, two friends of me have to leave since they have lectures the next year. It is a great pity since I want to talk to them more. But I go to have a drink with the other two friends: Nancy and Airin. We continue with talking about everything and at the end we take our diary to pick a day to meet again. I like the initiatives of my two friends because my other friends (girls) usually wait for my initiative.

Today I meet an old classmate who I know from the Secondary School. I call him yesterday about the meeting. It has been years ago that we see each other. In these few years many and many things happen to us. He was 'recovered' from a serious disorder. His personality is also changed alot. Also his look and bidy is quite different. The first thing that I note is that he is very skinny, altough he was an average man at the Secondary School. I think it might be the operation and the disorder that makes him so skinny. I am also more skinny than before the operation although my weight is now 1 kg less than before.

It was really nice to see old friends back. We talked alot about our past and what we do currently. I wonder how other classmates will be...

It is a weird week for me. There are several nice and less nice things happened. The most happy thing is the graduation of my friend Mark. He starts with Electrical Engineering as when I start (which is in 2001). Currently there are only some students of our study-year left, who is still doing Electrical Engineering. Most of them has stopped already at their first year of the Bachelor, since it is too tough or it takes too much time for revising and keep working hard.

I am very glad for Mark that he finally reaches the "finish". He is the first one of all the Electrical Engineering students of 2001 who is graduating in our University. There is only 1 classmate/friend who graduated before Mark. Her name is Toby. When I was in Singapore, I had planned to visit Toby. But finally I could not make it because of the time issue.

Well, Toby finished her Master degree in Imperial College. She took one year Master course which is very tough. Mark finishes his Master here and now he is searching for a job. Below, there are some pics I took at his graduation.


I skip lectures at the Nuclear Institute when I went to Mark's graduation. I may miss lots of important things at the lectures, but I only know that my friend's graduation is more important. Fortunately, during the laboratory where I have nuclear tests, this week I have two tests, I manage to do them well without following the introduction course, which is given when I was at Mark's presentation.

The Wednesday is a really busy day. I have lectures and tests in the Nuclear Institute. Above, Mark's graduation. I have to rush through the tests since I have had a meeting with my friends who I know from Singapore. We met each other in Amsterdam, where we have had Japanese food. The day before, Tuesday, I have extra lectures till 9PM!!!

The night at Tuesday/Wednesday is horrible since I get a horrible phone call of my friend. I have never seen her being so "don't-know-how-to-do" and feeling lost. I have known her years. One thing is true: no matter how strong you are, one day your weakness will beat your strength.

*continue later*

Today I went to swim with my relatives. My uncle was even present since he was free. I remember the time that I did not know how to swim. My uncle always took care of me. After many years later we were together in the swimmingpool again. My uncle pays more and more attention on his health in the last few years. Being health is very important for me.

Well, I was in the swimming for hours. The time when I was swimming in Singapore with my friends, was really great. The time in Singapore was very great! These few days I was creating a slideshow with pictures I took and I burn them on DVD (with music) for a friend. This Wednesday I have a meeting with my friends who I meet in Singapore. I am really looking forward to it.

Sometimes I think about some matter of friendship. For me, it seems that friends are "coming" and "leaving". At the Primary School I usually played with a friend, calls Hide. When we went to the Secondary School we separated. We have no more contact from that day. At the Secondary School I had some friends who I used to talk to alot. But once we went to college we also have no much contact. Till the time when I attened at the University, I only have had Dutch friends. I did not know any Chinese people before, except my classmate who I know from the Primary School. At the study-time, I mainly know Chinese friends. There are many so-called friends who I know for years. But we never get close. And some of the friends who I get close with, seem to "dissapear". I mean, the contact is less and less.

Friends like the train I weekly take to and from my parents' house to my University. People who get into train like friends I meet in real life. During the trip some of them may leave the train (lose friends). There maybe new people will come in (new friends are created). Finally who will have the same destination as me? That is a question that never will be answered.

This coming Wednesday, a friend Mark will graduate. I try to be present during his presentation. However I have to ask two hours free since I have class in the Nuclear Institute. Hopefully that won't be a problem. I know Mark for more than 5 years. The last few years we weekly play badminton. Now he is leaving Delft and I don't know if I can meet him so easy. This year more and more friends will graduate too. It seems that the train is getting empty.

As usual I have to work in the restaurant today. I was a bit late since the bus driver was late. There are some typical things of the Dutch people. Most of the Dutch people will pay money for their own meal and drinks. No matter if they have dinner with his or her partner. Some of Dutch are very 'cheap' too, because they take everything with them. Today I have customers who ask me whether they are allowed to take the empty Chinese bottles with them. I think it is not a problem. Above, they ask me for a bag where they can keep the empty bottle which I think they are a bit weird. Besides to ask me for the namecards of the restaurant that are not available for them actually. But they wonder if they can get some. When I bring the candies and cookies to them after they have had their dinner they put all these things in their bag. When I bring other candies to them when they ask the bill they also put all these candies in their bags. They also put everything in their bag what lies on the table. For instance tissues.

Anyway, I don't like to write about them anymore. This weekend I receive the remote control of my friend Francis from Singapore. I thank him very much. I will try to do nice night shots and make his part of the forum more interesting. I also receive an order that keeps me waiting for almost a month. Hopefully I can surprise my friend with the thing I have ordered.

This week, a friend Min Hui calls me. I don't know where she gets the information of that I am looking for girlfriend. So far, I have not searched. Let's time speak.

Before I write this entry in my blog, I call a friend Celeste who stays in Barcelona now. The phonetalk is short because international call is expensive. It is nice to talk to her.

This week I have had my first nuclear experiments. I thought that the experiments start next week. So I haven't done any preparation which is very bad of me since it is one of the requirements. Above, you have to be aware of what you are doing. At the morning I am told that I have the experiments and since I have lectures in the whole morning, the only little time left is the break(s). In the very short time I rush to read and try to understand the things I have to do. Fortunately, I manage to do the experiments very well. That is because the things are not difficult. (I am so lucky. What will happen with me if the things are very tough? Maybe I am kicked out of the course...)

Well, it has been a very long time ago that I wear white coat. To prevent that your own clothes get in touch with the radiation and to prevent to take the radio-activity particles outside the Nuclear Institute, it is very sensible to wear coat and take a dosymetry-metre with you that can measure the amount of radiation you receive. Also, every time before you leave the room, you need to wash your hand with soap that "clean" radio-activity particles from your hands. The instructor told us how to wash. When you leave the room, the first you have to do is, going to a machine where you are checked for the amount of radiation of your whole boddy you receive. Once you pass the test, you can wear off the coat and take the belongings with you and you are safe to leave. Although the amoumt of radiation is very limited during the whole course, you never know what you will happen with you. A good prevention is very important.

My first task of the experiment is, finding out what kind of radiation the radio-active source is sending out. The Physics tells us that there are (so far known) 3 kind of radiation: 1. ALFA radiation 2. BETA radiation 3. GAMMA radiation. To distinguish these three kind of radiation, is not a difficult. The first thing you have to know is their relationship with time and their (characteristic) properties. With the help of my knowledge from the Secondary School and the course in my Bachelor (in the third year) "Solid Material Physics" (in Dutch it calls "Vaste Stof Fysica") plus some information I read, I manage to do the analyse. It seems that my source has two kind of radiation: BETA and GAMMA. I also have to determine the amoumt of the radiation and try to find out which material it is. I am able to find out all the things with some draws and calculations. The last thing that I have to do, is find a way to determine the thickness of a material (without a measurement that measures the thickness) with the help of my radion source. That is also very easy.

By the way, that is so far about my first experiments in Nuclear Institute. This Wednesday my friend Bou has his demonstration of his thesis project which is programming in AIBO. AIBO is very well-known robot-dog. Take a look at the pictures below:


I was late since I have had an appointment with my "professor" where I learn from him how to make a good paece-maker. He was more than one hour late because of the traffic jam. It was a very long time ago that I went to University so early: I arrive at the U at 8:30AM! He shows up after 10:00AM! In the meantime I did programming in MATLAB.

I succeed in implementing my approximation in MATLAB. My purpose of my new introduce apporximation is finding a better technique for the transformation of the signal in a discrete-domain/digital domain. Currently, there are 3 steps you have to go through before you are in the digital domain. That is in my opinion not effective since in each step you lost some information of the signal. With the help of my approximation I expect to combine the 3 steps into 1 step only. So a better representation will be in the discrete domain which leads a better paece-maker that can be achieved.

After I succeed in implemention in MATLAB, I test that out with a function. It approximates that function very good and it seems that my approximation has a promising surprise. Unfortunately, when I apply the function that I need to investigate, that is a function that can represent the hart signal, my approximation shows oscillation at the beginning and at the end of the signal, although the rest of the signal is very good. I am very dissapointed because my faith in the approximation is lost. My professor is fine with my attempts to improve the paece-maker, but he says that is not necessary to do since it is only a course and not my thesis. He says that the most important thing is that I learn from the purpose of the course which I fully agree with him.

Maybe I am very critical. I read many papers I get from my professor. There are some papers that I get of a PhD student who receives his honor from his country. While I am analysing the usual method for making a paece-maker I notice a fault in his paper. That surprise me and my professor. Altough the current seems good, but there are many back-sides. That is why I like to introduce my method to replace the current method. But I fail.