愛上了

很累，却无法放弃，第一次我爱上了。

可以加快答案到来的那一刻吗。

他和我，我和他。

明天早上八点有课，可是我睡不着。想想很久没有update blog了，将就直接online，然后早餐，然后上课。。。哈哈，第一次做那么荒唐的事。。。不过凡事都有第一次，不是吗？

听着我最爱的歌，写近来我的烦恼事，希望写了出来我会恢复正常，可是我懂，并不容易。

近来，我以为是我自己有问题，不能真真的去喜欢一个人，是我辜负了有些人。

可是，近来我在面子书上看到的，我得到的讯息，我脑中的记忆，让我很明白，原来，在几个月前,我的心里早就为他而留位。所以，我选择单身，因为一段没有感情的感情，对两方都很不公平。

从我没有注意他，到知道他，再和他开始讲话，慢慢的，连我自己也没想到，事情会这样发展下去。可是，他离开了，我再不能常常见到他。从一开始的不适应，我真的很想他，真的很想去找他，可是理智告诉我不能这样做。渐渐的，到现在，我并不再那么不理智的想他，可是，他在我心里的那个分量从未改变。

我不懂，是不是我想太多，是不是我们的相遇太晚。

还是，真的我想太多。

我懂，我不应该喜欢他，应该给自己一个限期，然后放手。可是我就是做不到，我就是一喜欢上了一样东西，就很难去改变的那种人。只要我能再见到他，知道他还没忘记我这个张某某，我就可以开心上一整天。

我要的，他应该给不了。但是，我有时会很奢望，他可以给我我要的。

不管怎样，我还是喜欢他。=)

真的很伤心吧。。。第一次对着萤幕边打字边痛哭。。。反省着自己的无能。

Rihanna - What's My Name? ft. Drake

Quite long ago song, but it's just nice... isn't? =p

The Black Eyed Peas - Just Can't Get Enough

I LOVE THIS...!!!

思

不知不觉中，我在书上涂鸦着你的名字

不知不觉中，思想飘向了你

不知不觉中，习惯成自然的想见到你

明知痛的，却停不了

明知结局，却管不了

明知愚蠢，却改不了

我的要求很简单，只想看见你

我的想法很简单，只要你爱我

要的结局很简单，只要你就好

你可不可以，帮我完成我的愿望？

What i thought abt recently

Been long time not update my blog with my little bit broken english n emo writings lol... Well, today i m not going to hav an emo post... Coz i have nothing to emo lol... Or i should say, i learnt how not to be emo anymore... Gone? that's it... XD

This world hav too many types of human... Countless... Indefinable... Good,Bad? Not specific enuf? Complicated, simple, childish, emo-flicks, cold hearted etc...

Realized that, sometimes, ur caring doesnt alwys accepted by the people u try to care abt... I mean, very minority of our friends... What we can do? just do nothing... Or, i should only care about the only closest friends i m with...? Well, thats true abt wat my friend told me when we chit chat-ed @ Snowflakes, Pavillion... She said 'Nowadays dun wan b ke po anymore... Since nt every friends i m closest with and not really knw them well... Talked alot wrong alot... Cz we dunno them well...!'

Hmmm... watever la....

Fate,

when it's urs, u cant escape from it,

when it's not urs, no matter how hard u tried to grab it, it will still fly away...

i wondering, why lotsa ppl still wanna banging their head over the wall since they knew it's a past... Self torturing both physically n mentally everyday... Why dun try to let it go, dun think too much abt it... Too free? Plan ur time with library, hang out-s, travels, works n etc...

Well, ppl said, ' i tried, but it's not as easy as u say' or 'diff ppl diff matter'... However, i do believe, WE ALWYS HAV A CHOICE... A choice u choose to set urself free or self torturing...

By ur very own way, but ends with same result- ' I SET MYSELF FREE LIAO'... Like Maths, lotsa diff ways to settle the given Q and ends up with same ans... :)

I never said tat, u will have no feelings at all when u meet/contact with the ppl that u loved/loving the most once upon a time/now...

We are human, memories cant b deleted like what our lappie/pc/ipad doing... Recycled bin n vanished...!

But at least, u will never feel so bad n hurts... Mayb u will just flash back ur memories n worst, u will emo half day??

'U can choose not to 4gt those memories, but u must learn how to put them down...'

Life alwys fullfill with options... Or we should say, options make our life... :)