Morning at Karpal Singh Drive

             
           

Photo by Marek Szturc on Unsplash

 

 

             

            I have decided to watch the sunrise, and Karpal Singh Drive was the first thing that pops in my head. I have no particular reason or preference for the location. Most probably because there is not much spots that I can think off, blame it on my limited knowledge of places. I could have equally witness the rise from Gurney Drive, name after Sir Henry Lovell Goldsworthy Gurney, the British High Commissioner. A fact that I’ve recently learn, I digress. But for reasons that I couldn’t comprehend, I did not pick the resort-esque place. That doesn’t mean Karpal Singh Drive is a bad place, far from it. Despite the horizon being fettered by the cityscape across the sea, there is much appreciation to be had. To make things fair, Karpal Singh Drive was name after Karpal Singh, one of Malaysia's most well-known lawyer. So, there I went. 

            Sitting at the edge of the seafront, the blue expanse filled my field of vision. I can see fishing boats, few yet spread out. Each boat felt to me like they were still in slumber, without a crew in sight, rocking cradle-like by the slow undulating current. Then at my east, anglers standing in fix position like still art waiting with patience for the first bite. A few minutes in, one of them re-cast the fishing line, not too late for a retry I suppose. Further east from where they were standing; stands the Penang Bridge, connecting life from the island to the land after it. Though far away, the distance still allowed me to make out movement of cars to and fro. Going to work maybe? Visiting friends? Off to a long trip? It was almost de-realizing to behold the trance of busyness under the idyllic slow moment in time. 

            Its funny how there is seemingly so much going on when scenery is put into words, as opposed to experiences felt through Time’s petty pace. Just sitting there, slow really means slow, the impatience, the need for onward movement becomes stronger as each second ticks away. How can the urge to be in the grip of “doing something”, to be busy, felt like a default state of being? If there is a reason I bet it will most probably be an evolutionary one. A passing thought that I did not indulge further.  

            Behind me was the pedestrian street, where mundanity takes the helm. On the promenade, joggers pacing, preoccupied with personal matters, with occasional cyclist zipping by. The engine of routine begins its motion, like a rail freight right about to depart, all bolts and cogs breaks free from their motionless state. As the activity continues, I begin to wonder, what are they thinking now? I haven't got the slightest clue, no idea what is in their mind. But something peculiar happen if you start pondering about it. Personal issues seems smaller, insignificant even. My problems must have never matter to them, as theirs to mine. There is a sort of liberation in that train of thought. Oftentimes we are so preoccupied with our own lives that we have never stop to ponder the possibility of taking a step back. Unfortunately, that sentiment was short-lived, only a brief hiatus from the immediate distress of the day to day. 

            Directly where my back was facing, a church, walled in glass, empty, with no congregates to be seen. Its adjacent, a Starbucks, the coffeehouse looks open for business. I can’t helped but to find the placing of the two structures ironic, the former preaching charity the latter survive on caffeinated avarice for profit, co-existing antonyms. Both antithetical entity will slowly but surely meld together as we creep towards the globalized world. “Globalized”, it has too much of a corporate feel to it. There should be a better word in its stead, I can’t think of any without falling into the sort of mawkish kumbaya-ism. Maybe next time.

            The monotony of life behind was ongoing but was immediately drowned out when juxtaposed with the imposing calmness of the ocean and the ever-changing hue of the sky above. Clouds looking like thick streaks of contrails filled the ultramarine atmosphere. Another impression it gave me was the suggestion of prison bars and us the inmates restricted from the insight of the great beyond. The dark blue tone fades as the sky steadily increases in brilliance à la solar power. A reminder of how Earth’s thin layered atmosphere filters the onslaught of solar particles, shielding us from their lethality, and incidentally giving us the colors that paint our vault of heaven. Scientific explanations are usually pitted against the poetic. Deeming them incompatible.The questions are always, is the rainbow only electromagnetism? Or is love only body chemistry? And they are typically followed by “there should be more than that”. What a misguided reductionist worldview. To which I answer, why not? Explanation does not have to dispel the enchantment one has of nature, I would say that it adds to it. It is a marvel that light scatters in ways that I perceived the eruption of colors that my rods and cones and internal optics would allow me. Isn’t that a better perspective to take?

            In front of me, just a couple of meters ahead there are birds perched on rocks chirping as though to warn others of their place defended. I still can’t tell if they were kingfishers, they have small bodies with a longer than usual beak. Glimpses of fish peeking out the calm surface leaving tiny echoes of ripple in their midst. There were even splashes to be seen, it looked like the fish was thrashing, like a wild horse struggle to break free from a rodeo rider. I wonder what was it, a squabble between fish? a fight for food? Only speculation can be made. I was tempted to leap forward and go down to have a closer look, a socially acceptable voyeurism I hope. The caveat was, I'll probably spook every rats which residing between the nooks and crannies of the rocks. Needless to say I did no such thing; relaxation is still my priority here.

            Across the strait, at the mainland sits a mountain which grabbed my attention. It was wrapped in white low-hanging mist, with an otherworldliness that calls to mind myth of ancient forest gods and elves  What could be delving within it? Mountains to me especially the ones that are cloak in rain-forest always have a sort of mystery. Abound in life, it contain the amount of species estimated to be 50 million or possibly more. That means almost half of our planets diversity both botanical and zoological can be found there. Just picturing myself being in there alone is both frightening and exhilarating. Alas, the illusion dissolved as soon as the base of the mountain reveals itself to my attention; sights of cranes and industrial chimney, of rectangular buildings arranged like an incomplete game of Tetris, drawing a stark image of industrialism, of words like manufacturing and infrastructure. It is a tough to thing to do, to appreciate. One is always reminded of the humdrum that is the everyday modern life. But if you can, it is something to behold. Arresting is not an understatement. Just let everything go. And let the panoramic scape fill your senses. 

            Although I failed to see the sunrise, it’s ascend can be witness with an unhurried shift in bright gold crimson hue behind the puffy covers. Shear boldness of the light emitted makes sunglasses necessary despite the clouds attempt to cordon off its passage. The stillness of the view moves with the spirit of how halcyon days are described. I didn’t take any pictures, and in this day and age one is prompted to feel guilty for not taking snapshot of things considered beautiful. No regrets though, just being there in that moment in time is good enough. There is a peaceful reassurance just by sitting there, feeling the caress of the ocean wind along with the rising sun giving its warm embrace.

On Being Happy

Photo by Colton Duke on Unsplash

   The drive to get up in the morning, the sine qua non to go on living. Everybody wants to be happy. But due to its transient nature, a constant resuscitation is required to keep it alive. The strive to repeat positive experiences and avoid discomfort is endless. It sounds daunting and yet, that is a mundane feature of our lives. To look at it in another way, we are essentially reiterating our efforts over and over again, just to reach the desired level of high. Which makes the whole of life seemingly narcotic, druggish. That could not be it. The solution can't be just to do more of this till we fade from existence. There must be a way to achieve a longer lasting fulfillment. 

   Every emotion at their core are similar, henceforth I would treat happiness and other states of mind indiscriminately. So, one way we could try is to not chase or avoid states all together. If we traverse the planes of consciousness we can see that all experiences are fleeting. However, they are powerful enough to shroud our field of vision in which we unconsciously view through. We need not follow this trend of things. We can lift this veil by knowingly observe it when it arises. By doing so happiness will not have to be relentlessly pursued. Acknowledging that it is just part of another experience that will die in the next moment is the first step to loosen its grip it had on us.

   Nevertheless, it would not be that simple, being aware alone is not enough to cause the thought to go away. We still possess the urge to prevent its demise, to resurrect it repeatedly. Take anger, a memory of someone mistreating you, you feel rightfully indignant, you are getting ready to show him/her that there'll be hell to pay, all the things you could have said at the time can be said in your head with the precise articulation that you intended, rewriting history so to speak. Notice that, at this point you are taking part in it, even reluctant to loosen your clutches on this thought. It is just so enticing to participate in the scenario that our mind had presented. That is how emotions and thoughts extends their own lifespan, with you incessantly re-manufacturing the condition for it.

   To cling to a particular state of mind is illogical once we consider another property of our thoughts and emotions. They simply pop in and out of existence within the recesses of our consciousness, with reasons beyond our control. But oddly as conscious agent we credulously identify with them, take ownership even. To press the point, try to pause for a moment and pay attention to the next thought that slides itself into your mind’s eye. When it appears ask yourself, what are the sources that lead to this thought? How are you it’s author?

   We don’t create them, and yet we let them take hold of us, letting them dictate our moods. The thoughts are either linked to a chain of causes that you are aware but not responsible for or they just appear with you being unaware and thus also not responsible for. You have no precedency in any of it, what you are is just a medium for these phenomena to express itself. This is not to downplay the importance of you as an individual but to enrich it, to allow yourself to take the backseat unaffected as your mental life unfolds itself. They just appear, that’s it, but we unknowingly claim that it is our doing.

   So, here is the cycle: an antecedent event, (e.g physiological, mental, event, etc), state of mind emerges, we identify with it, we respond according to it. Then the next noticeable state replaces it and your life under its influence continues. You can choose to live like this, but know that you will be at the whim of your next thought, feeling and mood. Reacting to it in ways that propagate the hedonistic treadmill, to mindlessly seek pleasure and avoid pain. Let’s hope the next state of mind that surface is a good one. 

Or you can realize, and live with more insight, having more charge in the way you live. To view things, mental and external compassionately. To experience reality more directly knowing that you and your mental life are part of it. To live with clarity. Its happier this way, don't you think?

Side note: We can still have goals, with this knowledge we do so without the emotional malaise that comes after. When we fail we are not sadden by it, when we succeed we know that this too shall end thus are less affected by its cessation. But that by no means detract the value of our actions.  If we choose to get a promotion, we take the necessary steps, if we fail, we can pick ourselves up and try again, if we succeed we celebrate, sure the emotions will subside, but because of the awareness, we are not so deeply affected when the joy of our achievements diminish. It is just part of the natural state of things.

Reference:

Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion

Can Words Describe An Image...accurately?

Photo by Shelby Miller on Unsplash

   Conveying an accurate picture through words sounds science fiction to me. When describing, one always run the risk of succumbing to the unwanted consequences of either using too little words, thus giving the readers/audiences too little information to process or adding too many, which drowns them with verbiage rendering the picture dull. Is there a nice balance? Sounds extraordinarily difficult to accomplish if not impossible, and I don’t think it can be done with 100% accuracy either. To achieve complete perfection one would need to accept the presupposition that words could act as substitute in verbatim for any visual image, can it? 

   Is it plausible that with the right combination of words the blind can be made to experience color? May...be? that is really a tough pill to swallow. In a more prosaic way of putting it, take an image of a tree. Alright, first readers would need to know the type of tree. Is it an oak, willow or evergreen? Next its shape, is it slanting or straight? Then branch and so on to infinitude. Reality contains within itself too many features to allow one to express in the proverbial 1000 words (And that is just one image mind you).

   If I revisit a tree in a park, I might get to see it from a new angle, but not with writing, what I am re-appraising isn't a tree anymore, it's always the author’s narrow visualization of a tree, a totally different thing. A camera would do a better job. You can argue that writing is a way to center the audience’s focus in accordance with the writer’s intention hence not every inch of nature needs a description, I agree but that ain’t the point here. What I meant is, can it conjure a “whoa I see it, did you see it too?” visual effect? You tell me.

   We are not evolved for the art of orthography like the way we do seeing. That is to say, reading and writing is just not a natural behavior. Also, the human mind is less equipped to deal with the abstract.This is why for better comprehension, writers are encourage to write in terms of the 5 senses, see, taste, hear and whatnot. Notwithstanding its limitation, that is the best we've got. As of now, it still stands that words remain to be an inadequate replacement for vision, but if one day humanity have perfected the art of words, I am open to it. I would really love for that to happen.




Gets me thinking:
http://nymag.com/scienceofus/2014/07/could-you-describe-colors-to-a-blind-person.html  
On writing:
The Sense of Style: The Thinking Person's Guide to Writing in the 21st Century

I Think Therefore I Am

Photo by Martin Adams on Unsplash

   

     The whole of Western Philosophy was never the same when René Descartes arrived at that one line (I think, therefore I am). Still, at the same time I believe many have misconstrued its meaning. By “many” I meant people who chance upon this phrase without holding any prior knowledge and any context to base on, I might be wrong. If you were to inquire a layperson about what the phrase meant, the answers you will more likely than not to receive would be something along the lines of “I can be anything as long as I put my mind to it”. The self-help assumption is understandable but nonetheless false.

I think therefore I am or cogito ergo sum in Latin ("Je pense, donc je suis" in its original French), is derived from the systematic questioning of reality, what the phrase meant is something like this:

     Imagine a demon or a god which has the power to warp reality. Everything that you know thus far is possibly an illusion. Math might be just a deception, your certainty of what 1+1 is could very well be a trick in which you are unaware of, all your knowledge and all your memories are fabricated, your body might not be real, you might just a brain lying in a container being fed with electrical signals to give you a false reality. So, the question is, what can you know for sure? If you radically doubt everything you know hitherto what can you know for certain?

To sidestep just a little bit, that line of skepticism is known as the Cartesian doubt, that is to question all of your personal beliefs from the ground up and build on what you know for certain.

     So, after a long meticulous meditation on the subject, he came to one conclusion, there is one thing in which the entity will not be able to trick. That is his existence, his own consciousness. The very act of doubting proofs that he is real. As long as I am thinking I exist. The “I” in I am could not possibly be false, without the "I" there won't be a placeholder for thinking to take place. Therefore, cogito ergo sum, I think therefore I am. The foundation of all truth.

     There is where the reasoning of cogito ergo sums ends. However even then, one can still be skeptical of “cogito”, the being that possess thought which is us the thinker. Does “I” really exist? What is this “I” that is doing the thinking? Question it.

Reference:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cogito_ergo_sum

Can Money buy Happiness?

Photo by Eyestetix Studio on Unsplash 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

        

 

        Can money buy happiness? My answer would be yes. To see why, you will only need to subtract the significant things in your life that were bought i.e your phone, bed, laptops. But there are other things that slip us by unnoticed, I am sure you’re not thinking about fuels for cooking, 3 billion people right now are cooking using woods, charcoal and other forms of biomass because they can’t afford to buy a stove (hopefully this will no longer be true in the future). As a result, 3 to 4 million died every year, due to smoke inhalation from burning those woods and coals. Imagine a family who live in extreme poverty, parents who are force to watch their child die due to a lack of food and proper medical aid. I would believe that a little money would bring these parents happiness, don’t you think? Not to appeal to emotions, but a rational reasoning would also arrive at the same conclusion. Can money buy those living under extreme poverty happiness? This question can rightly be rephrase to "Can money give them a proper food, shelter and a better healthcare system?" This is why it is crucial to lift global poverty. Happiness is strongly intertwined with wealth.

       Okay, those are just examples of what lacking in money would bring, maybe it will be different when you already have money, maybe the adage can only be applied to the middle class and above, where basic necessities have been met, maybe money will lose its potency then. Buying new shoes will only dial your happy meter up by so much before it drops back down to your usual mood. That being the case, something longer lasting must be obtain to maintain happiness, and that is something money can’t buy. But is there such a thing? Isn’t that a whole different argument altogether, it’s not so much “can it buy happiness?” but “can it buy long-lasting happiness?”

       Money can buy happiness, but it depends on what you use it for, to get a bang for your buck spend it on others, studies have shown that it will bring you more joy compared to spending all on yourself. However, if you only have yourself to treat, well then, use it on getting experiences instead of materials, go on a travel instead of new clothes. That's not all, another thing you can do is to buy yourself more free time, for instance people who pay others to finish their household tasks, à la time-saving services are much happier with an obvious lower rate of time-related stress. Surveys also reveal greater life satisfaction for individuals who spend money to increase their free time. 

       In short, yes, happiness can be purchase but just avoid tying it to your self-worth because after all, money is only a means and not an end in itself. 

 

Gets me thinking:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSIkdWxotKw 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwShS3JYvOE
http://www.pnas.org/content/114/32/8523.full

The Problem with Those "feelings" Advices

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

    Personally I believe that giving advice is easier than taking it especially when it comes to problems of psychological significance. For instance, anxiety, giving methods to alleviate it is fairly simple but carrying it out is another thing. You might feel good for a moment, feeling empowered even but it doesn’t take long to slip back into your original turmoil unabated. For simplicity sake I'll use anxiety as a placeholder for the rest of the "feelings".

   There is something about your problems that gives it a tighter grip on your mind; one of them is the frequency of it emerging in your thinking process. With each increasing amount of time the thought is resurrected, the higher the likelihood for it to lodge itself as a mental routine, and we know how difficult it is to break the cycle of habit. But this is worst, as emotions are in play. Emotions are what drive us and with anxiety it veers our sense of security uncomfortably close to the edge.

   Here is where a therapeutic advice comes in, what it manages to do is loosening the knot temporarily. Sayings like “it’s all in your head", "it’s all an illusion, "it doesn’t affect the real world” felt good when you think about it at that instant. However when face with the harsh reality that triggers your anxiety, that ounce of wisdom you are so glad a moment ago will seize to be helpful anymore. You repeat that words of wisdom to yourself but to no avail, heart rate is not slowing down, you can't think straight with the anxious thoughts looping in your head like a broken record, you froze. So what’s going on there? 

   Taking advises alone doesn’t help much because it involves replacing a habit with one that is psychologically juxtaposed. In other words, the guidance you've received is just not emotionally strong enough to put the flames of anxiety out. And here is another thing; unless you are fully aware of your own state of mind it will catch you off guard making you the puppet of your own psychology. That is why it is not enough, any steps taken should be done deliberately and with consistency, not easy, you need to be aware of it coming up.

   Again, to remember the advises when situation arisen is one thing, but to remedy it without being overwhelmed by the sudden surge of emotional discomfort is another. The solution is one where we heard it a thousand times, which is to be mindful when the thought arise and gently replaced it with that nugget of truth that you have just acquired, repeat this process until you see results. Or maybe by just knowing the reason why is it so difficult to mitigate it will indirectly makes it easier? This too is an advice.