An update

18 months, well, a little more, but not much.
Coralynn Flannery is a fat cow with a personality to match. She has the sweetest "I'm gunna do it, but I'm gunna cock my head to the side and give you my dimpled smile while I do so you can't get mad" face. She uses it all the time. Cora is an interesting one. She enjoys climbing, writing on anything, with anything, and exploring. She already plays with imagination picking up toys and chattering to herself as she wanders around the toy room or outside. She LOVES playing outside when the weather is nice (and even when it's not). She enjoys copying her sister and brother, although she knows how to try to get them in trouble if they aren't doing what she wants. DVD cases are her favorite toy, and we've lost quite a few of the children's favorites because they were left down too low.
Her favorite pass-time is reading, surprisingly, but she doesn't so much like to be read to as she likes to flip through the books herself. For the most part she's gentle with the pages, but she'll go through several books and switch you out for one or two in the process. It's adorable.

Kryton is 3 now, taller than a viking and more willing to destroy than ever. He's a tank in boy clothing. At the same time he can look at me with those deep chocolate eyes and just melt my heart. He's still my snuggler, and wakes much earlier than any of the others ready to play and scatter toys everywhere. He loves to explore and play rough, although with me he can also be incredibly gentle as we wrestle on the bed. He loves to torture Alisabeth and gets in her way constantly, but he loves to play with her and follow her around like a lost puppy too. I think, if he stuck with the second only, that she'd have no problem with him tagging along everywhere, but as it is he drives her bonkers.
He's also a huge helper. He is day-trained for potty training, can get himself fully dressed, and when he's in a good mood he's even willing to find clothes for his little sister to wear.
In this photo Jason's work had a giant service project to pack 4500 gift boxes for all of their clients. Kryton is helping move the empty, taped boxes, to the packing assembly line. He was a little slower than the line wanted, but the fact that he was helping didn't go unnoticed by anyone in the area as the rest of the kids ran screaming around and through the working adults. :)
On top of that he LOVES his daddy, especially when Jason is doing anything involving tools, cars, or being outside. The other day he helped Jason change the brakes on a friend's car.

Birthday Party at her Karate studio.

And Alisabeth. She's a yellow belt in karate - one step away from taking her orange belt test. She still has a gentle heart, and a friendly disposition. She is constantly surrounded by people who enjoy being with her, although she struggles with the concept of 'hosting' when friends come over to play. She skipped part of first grade, flew through second with straight A's and in 3rd grade she's been nominated for the Talent program (it's the advanced program). The Talent program focuses on spacial and out-of-the box concepts and this is where she seems to excel. I'm hoping she can find enjoyment in the additional class and the challenge of going above and beyond the classwork already offered to her. Her reading level is already well beyond fourth grade, although she doesn't get absorbed into books like I did when I was her age. Still she enjoys reading at times and can fly through a book in a few hours.
She loves candy and ice cream and spends the majority of her time asking for these items despite knowing that if she asks for them prior to eating real food, or as soon as I pick her up from school, the answer will automatically be no. She also LOVES electronics (TV, Minecraft, IPad games, and computer games). We limit her ability to do any/all of this so she's pretty frustrated with me, but considering the frustration disappears within minutes as she disappears outside to play with friends, I don't feel too bad, and I don't regret denying her screen time.
She also made the choice to be baptized soon after her 8th birthday. It was a great day filled with lots of friends and fun and as her father baptized her I felt so proud to watch her solemn little face. She took it absolutely seriously and worked hard coming up to it making sure to read her scriptures and say her prayers daily. Now we just need to keep her in that habit. :)

 Jason is doing well too. He loves his job and is working hard at it. His co-workers are often praising him, and he's had many opportunities, especially lately, to serve his co-workers and help with cars. He's enjoyed the ability and he's grown quite a few friendships out of the experience.
One of his best friends here in Atlanta gave him "Betty," an old '73 Pontiac Catalina. The poor thing should be let loose in the old car graveyard, but he's working her back up. It was towed over here, but within weeks he had it running, purring sweetly in the driveway. He's worked on the sound system, engine and steering. It has a lot of work to go just in that department, then will also need considerable bodywork (did I mention that you can see in the trunk from 3 angles with the lid closed?) but it's a nice project car and he loves it. Because of all of the restrictions here he hasn't been able to keep up a lot of his other hobbies, and budgeting issues (and forgetfulness) dropped his X-box Gold account, so he hasn't kept up with his friends quite as much either. (Not to mention the 2 hour time difference).

Theresa is having a good time too, although the move to Alanta wasn't as easy as she thought. Despite thinking she was laidback, she's learned otherwise. Bugs, especially, are EVIL, And Georgia is full of them. After almost 9 months of trying to stay at home she took a part-time job with a local company and works daily split between three departments doing basic book-keeping, using her skills in random ways, and just trying to do what she can. It's helped with the sanity, but not with the housework.

So that's an update on the people, but now for the bigger news:
We're changing our lives again. . . 18 months was enough to convince me that Atlanta is full of wonderful people. . . but not a place for me to live long-term.
On the heels of this understanding came our hardest decision ever. I love to work, Jason doesn't much care what he does so long as he gets to play occasionally, but he did miss the time he used to have with the kids, and serving the neighborhood around us. Car maintenance has been put off, and he spends almost 2.5 hours a day driving to and from work. After almost 3 months of deliberating and thinking we received an offer for employment (versus contract labor) at my job. The offer was either to continue on my part-time schedule or become full-time in the same type of position. I put off the decision as long as I could as we continued to debate pro's and cons and determine what our family ultimately wanted to do.
Finally I accepted the job offer as a part-time employee. We had a tentative plan of 18 months, but I still wasn't comfortable with it. Jason was more than willing to quit working and become a stay-at-home dad while I would return to work full-time, but I didn't want to be a 'quitter' and I wasn't sure if I was making this decision just because working is easier for me than child-rearing. I fought with it for another month. I prayed, we fasted, and then we found out we were pregnant (something we knew we were waiting for, and part of our 18 month plan). It was exciting, fit perfectly into the 18 month timetable, and everything felt like it was moving forward, except I still felt like there was something wrong/missing.
Still, we moved forward. I had to call my old firm to update some records I hadn't brought with me, but that my new employers needed, and while speaking to them I mentioned that our 18 month plan might consist of heading back to Idaho eventually. A few days later I got an email from my old boss. I emailed him back and he asked again about our 18 month plan wondering if we could/would consider coming sooner. I wrote back with 'no' but at the same time forwarded it to Jason just to show him what my boss had said. Jason immediately replied - heck yeah our time table can change. And things started happening.
Two or less weeks after accepting employment at my current, local firm I accepted a managerial audit position with my old firm taking the place of the audit manager who had literally just given his notice. He wanted to find a 9-5 job now that he'd had his first child, and as understandable as that was, my old firm didn't want to try to hire someone new and grow them up to the position, they wanted to find someone they already knew.
So, along with having a baby in June, I will be starting as an audit manager (my dream job) in January, we will be moving back to Idaho (my home), and Jason will become a full-time stay-at-home dad with all of the perks that this entails (including new power tools). As soon as I began considering this the feeling of 'quitter' slipped away replaced with an answer from God that He was okay with our choice, and that as long as we maintained Him first in our lives, everything else was up to us. Peace began to settle within me again, and excitement began to build.
And that's the last 19 months in a nutshell. . . here comes another (but hopefully the last) big change for our family.

Miracle Baby - Part 2

This is more for Coralynn and my memory than for my normal readers, but don't let that stop you. :)
Coralynn Ambyr Flannery's Birth story:
This is my third child, so even though I know every birth is different I still expected it to be more of the same, maybe even a little easier since 3 and 2 were so close together.
I couldn't have been more wrong - from start to finish this has been such a different experience.
I found out I was pregnant with the other two by a feeling - I just knew and then confirmed with tests and doctors. With this one I was lying on the gurney prepping for surgery for an unknown mass and suddenly everything was cancelled because little Cora was already growing inside.
From there it seemed that everything would follow the pattern of her siblings. She grew and grew and grew and I did too. The swelling was a bit worse with this one than with Kryton, and as far as Jason and I can remember there was no swelling with Alisabeth. Still, I didn't really think about it, and definitely didn't realize I should be concerned.
I brought it up to the midwife once and she gave the normal recommendations. A month later I brought it up to the doctor who prescribed compression stockings which only made things worse. Two weeks later I complained again and this time he did a little more investigation and I saw a moment of concern register on his face. Blood tests, a 24 hour urine sample, and some other fun things soon followed.

Combine this with all of the stress I was adding to my life and it's really not surprising that I was diagnosed with preeclampsia. Jason got a new job with Dell Security, requiring us to move cross-country, find somewhere to live long-distance, sell our house here, meaning we needed to pack and clean the place, I had to quit my job earlier than anticipated, made more stressful by the current items left on my to-do list that weren't very easy to pass on to a co-worker, and lastly the normal job of trying to take care of my kids. Poor Cora was getting the short end of the stick, I can understand why she would want to throw in a few waves to get a little attention. :) Just kidding, she had very little to do with it.
Well, now that we knew it was preeclampsia, there was really only 1 thing to do. Change all plans and prepare to deliver at 37 weeks. From everything I've learned that's the only way to clear up the problem for good. So plane tickets were cancelled and shifted. Housing and other plans were shifted. Our church stepped in to help and provide meals and care for the kids as I cut my already shortened work-time even shorter by several weeks. All in all it was an emotional week. To top it off, the diagnosis and all of the changes came the day Jason had to leave to drive our goods to Georgia. There wasn't really another viable choice because he started work a week later and it was a 4 day drive.
So I bawled off and on for the next five days trying to keep it under control and not be stressed and keep my blood pressure down.
Finally Nana arrived on Saturday, and I felt my second relief. I tried to relax, but my house was slowly turning into a pigsty and I just couldn't leave well enough alone.
Monday afternoon I got up after trying to put Kryton down for a nap, and something just snapped. There were toys everywhere, dirt everywhere, the kids needed lunch and I started in on it mercilessly. Less than a minute later Alisbeth took one look at me and asked "Mom, are you alright?"
I was holding my belly against what felt like a massive pulled muscle across the entire lower stomach. Needless to say I sat down and just tried to hold Kryton while my mom took over and finished off my small list of chores including lunch for the kids.
After about 45 minutes the pain was still there and I hadn't felt her move more than once. I tried to remain calm and called the dr's office to move up my stress test appointment from 3 to that moment, but they told me to go to the hospital instead since it was lunch time.
Our neighbor hurried over to watch the kids and my mom drove me down. I tried again and again to feel little Coralynn's movements, but nothing. As we parked I was barely holding back my panic and as the elevator doors closed to take us up to maternity the dam broke. By the time I hit the nurse's station I was a mess and they immediately hooked me up to a monitor. As soon as I heard the flutter of her heartbeat I felt such an intense relief. She was perfectly fine, a lot better, in fact, than her mother whose blood pressure had skyrocketed to 186/100something.
They monitored me for over an hour as my BP slowly fell down into the 168 range over high nineties  - a terrible BP, for those who don't know. Then they contacted the doctor and admitted me a few minutes later. I was started on pitocin and magnesium by 4:30, and the fun began.
I progressed at a steady pace. By the time I reach a 5 and 65% I knew this labor was going to be like Krytons. I was already shaking from the strength of the contractions, and though I was focusing better, we still had a way to go and the pain was rising along with my BP. My doctor had already told me that his recommendation for all preclamptic pregnancies was an epidural, so I gave in and called the anesthetist. It took him a while - an eternity it seemed, but eventually I found myself hugging a pillow while mild pricks went into my back. The guy was perfect. I've heard all different stories from the extreme worst to the very best and I'm pretty sure that my first time was the best. Heaven help the next anesthetist if we have another kid :)
Soon after he got it in and I lay back against the pillows I felt the next contraction come, but it was different. "Uh, nurse, I think it's time to push?"
She had been carefully starting the process of prepping the room, assuming that the 5 she had felt prior to ordering the epidural meant we had plenty of time. She looked at me and then started to hurry her pace a little.
The next contraction, "Yeah there's definitely something moving down the birth canal."
She did a quick check and didn't have to go far before reaching the baby's head. Leaving everything where it was she rushed from the room to call the doctor back to the hospital. She gave him 15 minutes to get there.
When she got back I was having my third contraction and could feel the body/head move into position. "I'm pretty sure he's crowing."
She hurries from the room again to let him know that 15 was too high an estimate. He had 5.
6 minutes later and two more contractions with no help from me and the doc was suited up. (Well, in his casual clothes with the labor and delivery outfit hurriedly placed on top). She moved the bed out of the way, he stepped forward - still about six inches away and said "Okay, on the next one you can probably push."
The next one had just started, so I obeyed and his eyes widened as Cora slipped easily out. He caught her just in time, although the umbilical cord was wrapped around her a couple of times and kept her from going very far. (Not around her neck, just her body).
She gave us all a good wail of frustration a moment or two later and off she was whisked to clean her up while the doctor finished with me.
Soon after he got the placenta out she was rolled down the hall to the NICU and I looked around. "I don't feel good."
The nurse snapped her attention to me, "What do you mean?"
"I don't know. Super tired." So I closed my eyes.
Next thing I know the nurse what shaking me awake and calling my name. Apparently I had passed out several times and even began to seizure, but came out of it quickly and with clarity. I looked at the alarmed faces of everyone in the room and answered their questions easily. For me it had been a very short nap, I even had a dream though I can't remember the details.
After that I was under much more scrutiny. Although my new little one was cleared from the room by 9, I was stuck there until at least ten thirty as they watched and monitored to make sure I wasn't going south again.
After eating a small sandwich and some crackers I was finally moved into a new room and soon after I was asleep.
That didn't last long of course, but I got in a few sporadic bursts throughout the night. Headaches (side effect of the magnesium), discomfort, dizziness, and even nausea have been my friends throughout the day, but that's the worst of it. The bleeding isn't bad, although my hemoglobin levels were down earlier. I feel good though, especially after being allowed to take a bath/shower and get cleaned up.
Cora was released from the NICU after 12 hours of observation, but stayed for a few more due to my condition. Now, however, we're together and loving it. She's strong and healthy. Beautiful color with only minor lethargy probably due in part to the magnesium. She's eating well, and latches well, and her grip is strong.
Little Cora, I hope you never have to wonder how much you are loved. I was so worried for you, I could not bear the thought of losing you before I got to meet you, and now that I have I love you even more. Thank you my precious daughter, for joining our family and putting up with my health issues. You never once showed signs of strain. I sense that this is part of who you are, but only time will tell. I am excited to meet you as you learn everything I can about you. Have patience with me, I think we'll both need it  :)

A time to be served.

I sit here staring out the window at one of the largest non-commercial moving trucks I've ever seen. Behind it sits a car dolly with my van on it and inside the two vehicles are everything I own save a few clothes and tools that I will need in the coming weeks. My husband sits behind the steering wheel going over the route one more time and then he hits the gas and the truck groans in agony as it pulls away. It's similar to the nervous agony I always feel as I watch him drive away on a long trip. It used to be the 4 hour jaunt to Salt Lake for work, or the two day trip down to Arizona, but today it's a 4 day trip across the continent. I think the hardest part of watching him leave is simply that my own departure seems insanely far away.
I had all my plans, I had everything booked and readied. I thought we were covered and set and I was all settled in and prepped for the short duration as I finish work, get Alisabeth done with school, and then head to our new home where we would have our third child and live happily ever after.
I should have known that was too easy. :)
Instead a significant swelling began a few months ago, worse than I'd had during the first two pregnancies. I could live with swelling though, it would go away eventually once the baby was born. Then came the high blood pressure. Not just high, high enough that my doctor's eyes widened in disbelief. From perfectly normal two weeks before to nearly 160 over something in the 90's. I don't know what those numbers mean, of course, but the nurse's concern and the doctor's immediate prescription of no more doing anything and having to relax got my attention.
Two weeks later (today) I went in again. This time there's protein in the urine, my blood pressure was 143 over 90something and the swelling is getting worse, especially in the morning when I can't even press my lips together because my entire face feels like a blowfish all poofed out. Today he decided that not only can I NOT fly out to give birth in Atlanta, but he's also taking the baby early. I'm at 35.5 weeks now, so 1.5 weeks from now Ambyr Lynn will see the world for the first time, ready or not.
Suddenly the entire world shifted and all of my carefully laid plans fell into the giant sinkhole that opened beneath my feet. The shock still hasn't really caught up to me. I have so much to do, and now I literally have no time to do it in. I was supposed to finish a bunch of audits stuff at work, doc says I would be better off not working at all, but I can't just leave everything in pieces, so I'm at least finishing out the week. We still have a car to deal with, and a house, and I have to babies who I'm not supposed to run after, but that's nearly impossible with an eighteen month old. On top of that I was REALLY counting on these last two weeks to finish cleaning and sprucing the house (I figured I would be able to do an hour a day without stressing my body too much, but that's not going to happen now either).
I've been crying off and on all day when I think about it, so I try not to. I've always tried to be the strong one. Nothing kills me more than helplessness, and yet, here I sit on my couch wondering how much it's going to hurt to stand up and head to bed with the kids, or if I'll even be able to sleep because of how uncomfortable the swelling can get.
And thus I find that it's time, once again, to learn the humbling lesson of being served. Christ does it for me all the time, but I guess I've grown accustomed to that, which is a problem in and of itself. Now, however, I have to accept that I really can do nothing of myself. The only way my kids are going to get taken care of is to plead and accept help from the many many people around me. So I post a quiet plea on facebook, knowing that it's family night and the chances of it being seen quickly are probably low. Not five minutes later I have a response. "I have everything on your list and more, what else do you need? How about dinner tomorrow? What time will you be home?"
A second response within minutes of the first, "I'll make dinner Thursday, what else can I do?" (This from the woman who already agreed to watch my kids all day for three days while I work.)
Then the barrage hits and I am literally overwhelmed by messages of concern and offers of items, and toys and things for the kids and for me.
Compound this with gifts from neighbors and others so that when we travel the children will have new coloring books, toys and crayons for the trip, letters and visits of love and how much we'll be missed. Cards, last minute dinner invitations, laughter and friends and it's no wonder we'll miss this area so much. The people here are so willing to share what God has given them, whether it's a smile and a phone call, or dinner and toys for a few weeks.
My house is bare and yet it has never felt so full. My heart is full too.
Then I had to go and read this month's message from our prophet. It's a message we're supposed to take and share with each other as women of the church, a simple message really, but so poignant and perfect in this moment: Christ lived a life of service and we are to serve and minister as he has done. When we do we bless lives and point others toward Him.
Well, isn't that the truth. I have definitely been blessed, and my thoughts immediately turned in gratitude toward my God who has always, and will ALWAYS provide a way for us.
I understand that it's our duty to serve, but the only way that's possible is if someone is willing to accept that service, and apparently now is my moment. I am grateful to be the recipient, humbled to be where I am, and working on my willingness. God is good, and the world is so full of His Children, those who fill this place with light. I have been grateful to live among them here in Idaho, back in Arizona, and am excited to meet a few more of His Choice Children as we begin a new season in Georgia. I hope that when my turn to serve comes around again that I remember this lesson and shine bright like a diamond.

In other news, Jason and I went to prom this week and had a blast. Alisabeth is finishing school with flying colors. She's had 12/12 on her spelling tests the last few weeks. She also helped me write out thank you cards for her teacher, the principal and her kindergarten teacher and without prompting at all she did a great job of saying thanks (in my opinion). She has also been an amazing helper with her brother. I love her to pieces.
Kryton is gaining his vocabulary at an astounding rate. He is up to full phrases now (common ones that he hears from us all the time). He and Alisabeth played hide and seek the other day for quite a while and he actually grasped that he was looking for her and she for him. It was adorable. He is struggling a bit with all the change though, so that's been a hard on everyone, but he's still got such a curiosity and happy disposition that the rages are somewhat easy to ignore.
Jason has been amazing. To get the house ready he has repaired, replaced, painted, detailed, and built everything from the fire alarm (original to the 1950's house) that finally decided it was giving up on life, to the back fence that now sports two removable sections where the broken swinging gate used to be. He's packed, re-packed, dealt with my nesting, and my frazzled nerves. He's massaged my feet and legs, been a stay at home dad, and now he's packing our things across the world so he can begin his new job at almost the exact same time I will be induced.
I could have asked for a more amazing husband, a prince among men. How grateful I am that the Lord heard my pleading and literally dropped the perfect man for me in my lap. (although he was a little shorter than I expected).
I'm doing well overall too. Mentally I feel a little on edge, for obvious reasons, but I'll handle it, and get back to where I need to be. I actually found a prom dress that fit over my belly, very cute and simple, so I splurged to rent in and together with another couple we danced the night away to good old classics.
God has been so good to us. I am excited for what may come.

The month of change :)

May 1st (Thursday) I got a call from Jason while I was at work. He held in his hand a letter from the Idaho State Board of Accountancy. In it was a letter stating that I had met all the requirements to be considered for, and had been accepted as a CPA in the state of Idaho. Elation, after years (literally years) of work, including going back to college for an auditing class, I have finally earned the certification I was seeking. So we rejoiced. We celebrated, Jason bought me candy and treats. We were delighted.
Friday May 2nd Jason received a call. Dell's Security team wanted him, was he still interested in a job? Which facility would he be most interested in, Chicago IL or Atlanta Georgia? What was the salary range he was looking for again? Oh, yeah, they could do that pretty easily.

So we rejoiced again, and I bought him flowers (cuz he likes that sort of thing).

Then panic set in as they gave him his start date and we realized the fun timing on all of this. I mean, it's all in God's hands, there's no ability to doubt that as I look at how it's all going down, but it's still crazy to try to keep up with His pace sometimes :)
If I had not gotten my CPA license during the April board meeting their next meeting would not have been until late June. Jason starts his job June 9th. I would have had to move to Atlanta and though the test is national, there's a certain amount of bureaucracy and hoops that have to be jumped through when switching states before receiving the CPA. They want to know why, they want to know all the details because they want to make sure you aren't just jumping ship to try to slip in under the radar when you don't actually belong.
The second fun part? I was due June 23rd. I swear that's the date I was given and I swear my midwife confirmed that date at least twice. I met with the doctor very soon after Jason received his offer. We had discussed and tentatively decided that I would have the baby in Idaho, wait a week or so, and then travel down to meet him with the kids. A total separation time of 3-4 weeks. My mother had agreed to come and be with me during the birth since Jason's six weeks of training wouldn't really allow him the ability to come and be with me. Then the doctor said "Well, looks like you're due July 1st."
"Wha?" That's almost a week and a half difference. That's really a cruel thing to do to a woman in her eighth month of pregnancy, but more important, that would add almost another 2 weeks to our separation. So we discussed it again and we've decided to do the unthinkable. I will be moving at 9 months (flying even - and yes, we've called the airlines, the airports and read articles online to understand the implications. According to flight attendants, doctors and a few individual experiences the danger generally comes in moving from low altitude to high altitude, but I'm going in the opposite direction, so the chances of going into labor are very low.)
My doctor's only warning (so far at least) - make sure you have a doctor and a game plan in place already just in case. Sage advice, and I followed it immediately. I have a doctor and selected my hospital and all that fun stuff. Cool part: I get to try a water birth! Atlanta Georgia is big enough to have all the necessary facilities. I'm excited about that part.
So in the course of 1 week our entire life changed. Jason's offer is more than we expected and plenty for us to thrive on without adding income from me working part-time. Although I may choose to open my bookkeeping business after a while, it will be purely to keep up my skills and pay for my continuing education rather than necessity to support our family. I can focus solely on the home and my family and our babies.
Jason's job is exactly in the field he was looking for, doing exactly the type of thing he wanted to do. It's similar to what he did in his internship, so he knows what he's getting into. He's thrilled and excited, especially because Dell is a well known company, and their security team is relatively new so he's getting in on the ground floor.
On the kid side, things couldn't be going better either. Although Alisabeth got a few yellow marks she's still scoring VERY well in her first grade classes (they do a warning system, green, yellow and then blue, but you can always pull it back up if the behavior is corrected in time).
We spoke with her teacher at the recent fundraiser they were having. I just wanted to thank her because Alisabeth has really been positive and happy about school, and I know it's because of her teacher's enthusiasm and efforts. Without prompting she teacher said "She's doing really well, I don't worry at all about her ability to continue into second grade."
That was a relief, I mean, her scores are plenty high, she's getting 100% on spelling, reading more than twice the requirements for her grade and has stopped writing her letters and numbers wrong for the most part, so I wasn't REALLY worried, but parents always worry, especially when we made the decision to move her forward into a higher grade.
Kryton, too, has been thriving. The boy speaks in half sentences already (I should probably look up the timing to see where he 'should' be at, but I haven't this time around. He loves the word nose for some reason and loves to point to his nose (and anyone else's). Aside from knowing and using the words please, thank you, and stop regularly and correctly, he now knows enough to give us one word descriptions for most of his favorite and regular things (candy, ice, drink, food, more. . . ) and he knows what he wants. If you try to give him something he doesn't want he'll shake his head to let you know you've got it wrong.
He does have quite a temper though. When he doesn't get what he wants he screeches and glares at you until he gets distracted by something else. Still, I can't help but adore him. He's so snugly and sweet most of the time, even when he's testing your boundaries.
Jason pointed to my belly and said "baby." So now Kryton will jump on me, and when I say "ow" or "be careful of baby" he caresses my belly and says "baby", then caresses his own belly and says "baby" It's adorable.
So amid the chaos we are beyond thrilled and excited for life right now. We still need to find a home in Atlanta (renting of course), but are working with a rental agent who seems VERY on the ball and has a couple of houses already lined up that fit our needs and wants. We also need to sell our home, but that too is flying at an unprecedented rate. Our home goes on the market Tuesday. We've got most everything already packed up. Jason will drive the moving truck with all our gear on the 3rd. I will stay for 2 more weeks to finish working and finish school for Alisabeth. This will ensure that I am insured when the baby comes under my old medical plan (since I've already paid the stupid deductible) and will give me time to wrap up my current projects. It will also give Jason a bit of time to get the house at least partially in order so that when I get there I can just go into labor and not worry about anything else :)
Here's another amazing 'coincidence' a new airline is coming to Idaho Falls airport (previously there were 2 airlines available here). They have a flight to Atlanta (1 layover), it's cheaper than flying out of Salt Lake, and their service to Atlanta doesn't start until June. The weekend we 'randomly' chose to move me just happens to be the weekend of the cheapest flights available. I'm getting myself and 2 children across the entire country for $400 and 6 hours of time. (Compare this with a 5 day car trip with kids.)
I have to say, for those who don't believe in God, or that His hand is directing each of our lives, I just don't see it. The evidence is too great for me. I KNOW He has been working behind the scenes to get Jason this exact job. (I didn't even tell you the miracle there. Jason didn't apply for this one. His friend from the internship, who already had a job, got approached by their recruiter and said 'not interested, but I know someone you should talk to').
I love the life He's given us so far, and my gratitude runneth over.

More than Half Way!

As my baby kicks me from inside I thought it might be a good idea to update this on my lunch hour (instead of studying my accounting book). :)
The Flannery Clan had a good week. Alisabeth is doing well, so far as I can tell, in her schoolwork. She comes home with a spelling list each week and we went through them all without issues. She's also had some homework that she and Jason have done. We did have our first casualty though, apparently she checked out a book and can't remember what she did with it so she has to pay for it before they'll let her check out another one. :( She was very upset or 'scared' as she says. She's 'scared' about everything that she's unsure about.
Kryton is doing well. His "STOP" is very clear. :) He loves to be tickled, so he comes and we have tickle fights at least once a night. The problem is that he bites whenever he gets riled up. He's better most of the time and gives raspberries now instead of biting, but he still takes a good chunk out of the flesh whenever he gets too excited to control himself. He continues his love of reading and is doing a little better in the mornings. (The kids wakes up between 4 and 5. . . needless to say there's no one to respond to him at that time, so after screaming for about ten minutes he goes back to sleep until it's the real time to get up. We've reduced his naps down to 1 and sometimes he doesn't even get that one, but he still gets up that early no matter what :( This morning at 5:30 I handed him a bowl of cereal, a bottle of milk and turned on Baby Einstein in the downstairs living room. Terrible, I know, but that's the way we roll sometimes.)
Tiny creature, as mentioned in the opening line, is growing on schedule so far. Kicking up a storm inside my belly and overall enjoying life. I lent out my maternity clothes to a friend a while back and still haven't retrieved them, so he's been getting a little squished as my belly begins to expand beyond the normal size of my pants, but she puts up with it well. We find out the sex in 2 more weeks (on V-day), so that will be exciting.
Jason has continued to apply to new jobs. His Houston interviewers never called back so eventually he called them to see if they had made a decision, but apparently they went on a hiring freeze. :( His interview with Galusha's IT went well, we guess, but they're not in a hurry to make a decision, so in a few more weeks they'll weed the list of applicants down and decide who to call for a second round of interviews. . . I haven't heard anything on my end.
He also found plans online to make a cat tree (since our little vermin snatchers are staring to scratch everything) and built that this last week. It's rough because we only had remnants of carpet to use on it, but we'll look into prices and probably replace that sometime to make it look a bit nicer. He's considering building one more with a few modifications to see if he can sell them. They don't cost nearly as much as CostCo/Petsmart would have you believe :) And ours is heavy, which is important to me since my bruiser cats always seemed to knock it over if it isn't. He did a great job and got a new tool out of the deal, so he was happy.
As for me, we're starting to ramp up into the busy season and that is a mixed blessing :) I've been getting through my work, although there's a lot to keep track of. Gotta start making my lists again. It feels good to crank out the work though rather than just sit on my hands and try not to waste time. I did my taxes too, and was disappointed to note that we owed for the first time. It was at the state level, and I didn't take into account the fact that Jason's earnings were in UT rather than ID, so that's a bit of a shame, but I learned my lesson. :)
I don't think I ever mentioned it, but our office moved into a new building. They built it specifically for us, and this last week we had a community open house to celebrate. Jeeze there were a lot of people here. I had to make appearances, couldn't handle just staying out there the whole time, so I disappeared into my office and wrote my paper for my class intermittently throughout the night. It was awesome though, several of our clients from Blackfoot (about 45 minutes away) came to see us. In addition the CEO came over from Helena to be there for the ribbon cutting. We had awesome catering by another of our clients, and got to gloat about how awesome our new offices are. I saw about 1/3 of the clients I work on for audits, and a lot of others I have met within the business community.
In addition I decided to make the leap. My goal was to publish a book before my birthday. My mom agreed to help me edit my book and get it ready. We passed that sucker back and forth dozens of times. She made edits, I made changes, then she edited again and changed it back to the way I'd had it :) (okay that didn't happen often, but when it did it made me laugh). The end result was much closer to a romance (it started as action), but I liked it. Then a bit ago I made the leap and published it through Amazon's self publishing methods. They'll let anyone put anything up there, so it's not as though this is 'breaking into the industry' but for me it was just a goal and something I've always wanted to do. Staring at my kindle-edition book is very cool. Now I just need to convince her to retire so she can be my full-time editor :) There's two more in the published book's series, and I have an entire series (just finished writing book 5) of sci-fi that I really like. . . ah, dreams.

Life is good. I've forced myself into a schedule requiring me to be in bed earlier, and I'm liking the results. I feel less exhausted (for obvious reasons), and even though I'm not getting everything on my goal/schedule list done every night I feel like I'm regaining a little stability and control over myself. Could also be that the sickness is gone and I have a little of my energy back, whatever the reason, I'll take it. :)
Jason joined me in my goal, so we've both been going to bed earlier and it's so much easier to deal with a 4am Kryton than when I've only had 3 hours of sleep. Now when it takes me an hour to get to sleep it's not that big a deal.

That's us. Healthy again (everyone had something within the last two weeks), happy again, and moving forward with faith.

Tides of Change OR The Ides of March :O

Well, dearest readers (mostly myself while I ponder on my own amazingness I'm sure). It's that time again, the time when my guilt requires that I act, and my tiredness gives me the gumption to do so.
So, what changes have the Flannery Clan had in the last however many months it's been since I last posted? PLENTY!
You know about the miracle pregnancy. Well, with a few more minor bumps in the sickness road, we're apparently over the hump and doing well. At my last appointment the heartbeat was strong, and I can feel the little parasite flipping and flopping occasionally. (Causes me strange heat flashes too, just like Kryton did).
The next member up? Kryton is doing well. He's chattering up a storm but we've got about five recognizeable words so far. (By five I mean those moments where he stops talking and is actively doing something routine and says it twice in a slightly slurred clear voice that all toddlers have when they're first learning to speak. I think I've heard thank you. I think I've heard heart (he loves to read and that's one of the shapes in his book). I think I've heard more. I know I've heard "uh-oh" (the old favorite), and "no" (aimed at the kitties mostly when they circle him at meal times like little sharks).
Did I mention he loves to read? This little dude will sit through a whole book (well, a whole kids book) and look at pictures and flip through pages. When we take a shower in the mornings that is our routine. I wash everyone down and then (when I was still feeling icky sicky) I would sit on my shower chair and hold him in my lap and read his shower book for a moment or two while I regained enough strength to dry us both off and keep going. It's a good thing he has a strong bladder cuz at that point it would take me a good twenty minutes to get enough strength to put a diaper on that kid. :)
He also solved the riddle of the stairs a few weeks back. Prior to that moment he would stand at the top (after climibing all the way up and then realizing no one was up there with him), and scream and scream until I came and carried him back down. Then one day he finally got bored with that I guess because he turned right around and scooted legs first down the stairs. Hasn't had a problem since. He loves the stairs now. :)
He also loves soft things. He got a new blanket for Christmas from Nana and when he's even slightly tired and can find it he will cuddle with it and lay all over it trying to soak up it's softness. He does the same thing to the kittens if they're not smart enough to run. We hear their squeels of discomfort as he literally lays on top of them and have to come running to the rescue. . . and yet they still haven't learned. Apparently we didn't pick the brightest in the bunch.
Next up is Alisabeth. Wow has she had some fun changes recently. Knowing that we were having a fifth, and wanting to pay this one off before it was born rather than a year later, we took a look at our finances and made some hard choices. One of those was to take her out of her private kindergarten and put her into public school. Since we were going to throw her through the loop anyway we decided to do it right. We contacted her new school and asked them to perform an assessment to move her up to the first grade starting in January. The process was a little stressful for me, I'll tell you. First they had to test her, and though I wasn't worried about her ability to do well on the tests, I was quite worried about her willingness to participate. She pendulums all the time from excitement at things to utter boredom and I knew she would do that during this testing process. I did what I could to gently remind her that this was a serious thing and she needed to focus, but let's be honest, she had two solid hours of testing three different times. Any six year old would be dying. She was valiant though.
At the end Jason and I met with a panel from the school including the psychologist who had performed the tests, the school councilor, and all three of the teachers involved (1 kinder and 2 first grade). We went over her scores which put her smack dab average with other first graders, and then discussed her emotional readiness for first grade. It helps that she was already attending all day school. After a very lengthy discussion everyone weighed in with the concerns being mostly theoretical and related to later on in her education career. Only one teacher worried that she might struggle now because of her energy. Then it was the principal's turn and she made a great suggestion that instantly relieved both my reservations and my concerns. She suggested that we make this a trial period for her. That Alisabeth finish out first grade and then we re-look at how she did and whether we still feel like she was progressing at the rate she needed to and filling in the holes in her education. If not she would repeat first grade, if so then she would continue in the new grade level. I loved that idea because I am confident that she CAN do it, but not so confident that she WILL. The emotional part was the part that worried me. So if she chooses not to push herself and excel, then we'll know within the next few months and we'll drop her back with her age group and call it good. She won't have lost anything, and we'll have gained something from the experience. We discussed how she would feel if she does have to be held back and to be honest I don't think she'd know or care really, unless it's pointed out to her by others of course, but no one in her class would even be aware so I don't really see an issue there. I'll keep you updated :)
So far her first day was "terrible." She "cried all day" and "didn't like her teacher."
We discussed why the other children were staring at her (because they were interested in her, she was new and they were excited to know about who she was).
The next day was "fun." She "loves her teacher" and "got in trouble." All within the same two sentences :)
By the end of the week she was excited at the work they were doing and what she was learning. Although I almost gagged when I saw her phonics worksheets :)
Next on the list is Jason Lee. That boy has also been though quite a transition. He finished up working for the LDS church (his second internship) in late December. They actually let him stop working a week early which meant he got to be home for Christmas and New Years, both of which he was scheduled to miss. We were delighted except when the paychecks didn't arrive :)
Now he's taken back his role as stay at home dad for a while. During the testing period for Alisabeth we kept her out of school until we could decide which class she would end up in (I thought one major change was enough), so he did homeschooling with her. Now he does at least one activity with her each day when she gets home from school in the afternoon. We also instituted a new punishment since nothing else is working, so when she's really struggling with whatever it is she gets to write twenty-five lines. It may sound a little mean, but both Jason and I went through it, so we know what it's like, and she absolutely hates it, so maybe it'll get the point across. Plus it's better than screaming, and it helps her handwriting skills. :)
He also applies for at least 4 jobs a week. We've branched out across the nation in search of work. Recently he's finally getting calls back. The two top runners right now are my own company, Galusha, Higgins, and Galusha, and a company in Houston TX. Jason has two major (and different) parts of CIT that he enjoys. One is the hands on network administration where he watches over and takes care of a network or company. The other is security analysis where he watches for external attacks and would eventually begin to learn to fight them and track them back to their source. He did the second one with the LDS church and really enjoyed it. That's what the Houston company does too, so he's excited about their call and the second interview he had last week. Galusha, on the other hand, is offering him the position of Network Administrator where he would be in charge of our entire firm's networks (software and hardware). He has that interview this coming Tuesday.
There are a few other fish on the line as well, but so far none seem really interested. . . he'll keep applying though, until he hears for sure from someone. :) Four months and counting to get that figured out or he gets to go apply at Lowes.
Which brings us to me. I think I already mentioned this in the last post, but just in case, I'll become a full-time stay at home mother in June or July or whenever this kid pops out. I gave my notice. Three is too expensive to keep in day-care, and it's just time. I'm done trying to fight my own internal conflicts of wanting to advance my career and knowing that doing so will require me to sacrifice even more of my time with my family than I already do. (in the short term at least). I also have a lot of dreams and goals that have been pushed to the back burner for quite a while that I'd like to start making a reality. Some of those will still be on the back burner since I'll have two kids under two to take care of, but there are other areas (such as living the very basic principles of my religion) that have slipped a lot in the last few years and this will reduce my available excuses. I have goals set for once I'm home and I have plans. We'll see how many make it to fruition :) I'm excited and terrified at the same time. The corporate world is much easier in a lot of ways. I only have to take crap while I'm there. Once I leave I can let it drop off my shoulders and worry about picking it back up the next day. As a stay-at-home mom I'll have to find better ways to manage that stress so that it doesn't get a chance to overwhelm. I'll have to learn what it means to be a full-time mom again. I did it once, and struggled a lot, but not with two, and that's the part that terrifies me. A needy baby, and a jealous toddler . . . I'll be fine though :)
Other changes for me, well things I haven't mentioned here at least, is that I sit on two boards now. I currently sit on them as a representative of my firm, but at least one of them has mentioned that they don't want to see me go regardless of whether I'm employed or not. It's nice to feel wanted. :)
I'm also starting up some water arobics classes for mothers-to-be that are put on by the hospital where I will be giving birth. They have yoga or water arobics for free to all mothers-to-be, but I didn't take advantage of it last time because I was too busy.
This time I've slowed way down. I told my bosses that I won't be working more than 40 during tax season, and while that fills me with guilt, I know it's necessary. I'm trying to hurry and get in the class I needed so that the state will grant me my CPA, trying to be a mom, trying to be pregnant, and trying to be more of a part of my community. That with a full load tax season isn't possible. Plus if Jason does get a job then I'll probably be a single parent for a while until tax season ends and Alisabeth finishes the school year before we move to join him wherever he may be, so we figured we'd plan ahead on that one too.

All in all, we're trying to get our lives in order as much as possible to be prepared for what we know/think is coming and though we can't ever be 100% we learn a little from every experience we've had in the past and use it to get a jump on the future if we can.
In the interim we've got a couple of really good friends and we continue to invite couples and families over for dinner as often as we can to get to know more. Every Friday and Saturday night we have game nights. Friday is D&D 4.0 with a REALLY fun couple who are a lot like us. Jason and the husband have a lot in common and every time we talk we find more and more. They've brought a few of their friends to join in so we often have some fairly rousing games and just enjoy living in a fantasy world where you can jump off cliffs and use your magic ring so you won't get hurt, or can take a chance and charge your carts into a known trap and if everyone dies it'll be okay because it's all paper and pencils anyway.
Then Saturday night we do something similar with a different couple who we've known most of our married lives. They are also great and the intelligent conversation and inane, often arcane and unnecessary, information that we share with each other keeps everyone entertained for hours. In between we find time to kill whatever evil creatures are trying to destroy the innocent and subvert our goals. Again we get to live in fantasy for a few hours and just release constraints to make up whatever comes to mind and go with it.
The relaxation I get from this is probably akin to yoga for others. :)

God has been incredibly good to us. He's surrounded us with a beautiful, loving community that almost makes me feel uncomfortable with the level of concern and caring they have for us personally. He's given us a home that couldn't be more perfect for us. Quirky, yet stable enough to depend upon. He's given us a congregation of people who care, and show that they care by being more than willing to step up and help when we need it (hopefully we're doing the same). He's given us schools, and experiences, and people that fill our lives with joy and learning. Although I dread the uncertainty of knowing where we'll be in six months, I can't complain about where we are, or where we've been. I also can't complain too loudly about what's coming because we know that His hand will lead us, and that wherever we end up, we'll be able to be a part of His Plan, which is really all that matters anyway.

Thanks for sharing a few moments. Hope it was worth your time.

Miracle Baby

I would feel ungrateful if I didn't shout this out to the world, especially with our recent reminders about gratitude and how important it is to share our gratitude. So technically, this blog is dedicated to my Heavenly Father, but I figured it would be nice to share the news with my family  and friends too. :)
First thing's first. Ever since having Kryton more than a year ago I've had complications. Continual bleeding, and lots of other things. I've been in and out of the doctor including having a minor surgery in May.
Now I need to preface this with 1 fact. My husband used his Priesthood to give me a blessing before the first surgery. In it I was told that the Lord was completely aware of me and that through everything I would go through I would see His hand and know that He was in control.
After the surgery we had a few more visits but I'd pretty much resigned myself to whatever my body decided to do, then I had the day of pain. I was out of the office working at a client. I had a little discomfort and went to the restroom where I proceeded to die. It was worse than a gall bladder attack. Worse than natural labor. Worse than going from a 1 to a 10 in 1 hr. I thought I was going to throw up, but I couldn't move to do it. I was sweating because of the intensity of the pain. When I finally could move again I just lay on the bathroom floor for about fifteen minutes. From there I moved cautiously to a couch just outside the bathroom and waited another ten minutes. From there I made it all the way back to my team and then lay on the ground behind our little area and out of sight for another fifteen minutes. My boss said I was as white as a sheet. She was really worried.
The next day I scheduled an appointment with the doctor. I was still tender but I'd had no other similar pain. Still, that's not something I was willing to ignore. So I went and they pushed around on my guts and wanted to just pass it off as a gastrointestinal thing. That wasn't enough for me. I kept insisting on more and the doctor finally authorized an ultrasound.
The ultrasound happened soon after and while in there the technician saw an abnormal amount of blood being pumped into one spot of my uterus. In addition there was a large section of abnormal coloring. It was obvious. Even I could see it. H
er concern, although very well hidden, was obvious as well. She took the measurements, did some excruciating things to try to make sure it wasn't connected to the ovary, and ordered a pregnancy test just in case it was a tubal pregnancy.
It wasn't.
So the doctor ran blood tests to verify that it wasn't cancerous and we scheduled a surgery to remove the unknown mass.
The surgery ended up getting pushed out a bit and didn't happen till about 6 weeks after that ultrasound appointment.
Now for the miracles.
I prepped myself for the surgery. I had people fasting and praying for me, I was a little worried because there was a decent chance that the doctor would have to take the ovary as well. Jason took time off work and together we dropped the kids off at preschool and then spent the day together until we needed to go in to the hospital.
We got in, got prepped, and then the nurse came over and started getting me all ready to get fluidized (prepping me for surgery). As she lifts my arm to put in the needle another nurse comes in the room. She glances toward me and then says, in a slightly harried voice, "I need to talk to you."
My nurse almost continued with the injection, but after a second she put the needle down and followed her co-worker from the room. They were gone for 20 minutes while Jason and I laughed.
When she came back she said that the doctor was on his way and needed to speak to me before we proceeded. We waited another 20 minutes, now getting just a little annoyed with the fact that things weren't moving forward. Then the doctor appeared with a strange grin. "We can't do the surgery today. You're pregnant."
"Wha?"
"Your pregnancy test came back positive, so we can't do the surgery."
"But you just took a pregnancy test at our last visit?"
"Yes, and it was negative."

Let me pause here and explain why this is a miracle: I mentioned complications. One of these complications is that my body was continually shedding the uterin lining. Pregnancy under those circumstances was thought nearly impossible. On top of that the 5 years between Kryton and Alisabeth suggested that we were going to have a tough time with kids in general. Let's add into this story the fact that Jason is gone for 1/2 the week every week, and I was too shocked to speak.

The doctor congratulated us, but also gave us the warning: The size of the mass that we had seen suggested there would be complications. It could continue to grow and wrap around the fallopian tube, it could damage the baby or hamper it's growth. There was no way to tell, but he was optimistic and said that if the baby survived to the second trimester he would be able to perform surgery at that time and remove it without endangering the baby too much.

We went home thrilled, terrified, excited, and unsure about the future. At the same time we were too excited to hide our news. We tried to share the good and the bad so a miscarriage wouldn't be unexpected, but we couldn't stop ourselves from sharing.
I scheduled an appointment for the next week, which got delayed for two weeks, and when we finally got in there I was anxious to look at the ultrasound. Had the mass grown? With a pregnancy I knew nutrients would be shunted to the uterus and that would only serve to feed it right? I had nightmares of seeing my tiny jelly bean next to a huge monster blob. So the ultrasound technician gets started (not remembering me and my situation). Finds that baby without too many problems and snaps a few pictures. Meanwhile I'm searching the image for the discolored mass. She checks out the right ovary and then the left, no issues.
"I'm going to have to press just a bit, I didn't get a good image on that one."
"That's alright, nothing you do can be as painful as what you did last time." I joke.
"What?"
"Last time, there was a mass and you wanted to see if it was connected to the ovary. . . "
Her eyes widen. "That was you? I remember that! I have a picture of it on my board to follow up. Did you get the surgery?"
"No, I'm pregnant so they couldn't do it."
She immediately shifts focus and begins searching for it. We searched everywhere spinning the camera in a 360 degree view. Got to see the baby a bit more, but no mass. Nothing. No discoloration, no additional blood flow except to my little grain of rice. The mass was completely gone.
Puzzled she shot a few pics of the same area, verifying it against the previous images, and then packed up and shook her head in amazement.
The doctor did the same. He says we'll check again in a few months just to make sure it's really gone.
Jason's co-workers said the baby got hungry. I'm okay with that.

If that were it, it would be miracle enough, but the Lord's hand is still working, and I have more to be amazed and grateful for.
I'm fairly certain it's a girl already. Why? Because of how sick I started to get. With Alisabeth I spent the first four months lying in my chair at work and just wishing I could die. With Kryton I was tired but that was the worst of it. Soon after the doctor's appointment I hit the six week mark for the baby and started to feel like crap. I had to eat every 2 hours or less. At first it was just 'had to eat.' that soon transitioned to "what can I eat?" Everything tasted disgusting or made me want to throw up. I could eat two or three bites and then wouldn't be able to get anything else down. On top of that I got a 24 hour stomach virus and nearly died. Even water wouldn't stay down.
Meanwhile remember that Jason is only here 3 days out of the week. Thank goodness we had some wonderful friends staying with us. They put Alisabeth to bed a few times because I was long gone and she was still bouncing around the house at 9 at night.
But they moved out last week.
So I came home, tried to make food for all of us. Managed to feed Kryton, but couldn't feed myself. Put everyone to bed and tried to eat again. In total I got down 4 small bites of food before I had to go lie down. As I lay there in the darkness wondering if I would survive the night (yes, I'm dramatic, but nausea, hunger and general feeling like crap does that to me). I started to pray. I begged for help. I asked that I might have the strength to endure and be able to eat and function normally. My children needed me, and I knew the baby wouldn't survive long. (I've already lost 10 lbs and it's only been two weeks).
I went to sleep soon after.
When I woke up at 6:30 to hear my son screaming I rolled out of bed awake. I got him up, we ate a small breakfast together and then Alisabeth woke up and we all started our morning routine. I went to work where I ate two meals and felt fine all day. I came home and made dinner without a problem. I woke up the next morning and repeated the pattern. Sickness completely gone. Completely. I am still tired, and I still need to eat at least once in 4 hours, but this is my fourth day and He's still blessing me.

I can't say I'm the most deserving. I need to improve myself, but I can say that Jason's blessing has repeated itself over and over throughout this experience. I have definitely seen His hand. I can feel His presence in everything that has happened. I don't exactly understand the reasons for all of it, but I can't shake the feeling that everything was intricately connected and necessary to bring this little grain of rice into our lives.
Each of our children has been a little miracle. Each has been a divine gift. This baby, however, has been the most blatant one so far. I hope that I can prove myself worthy of the abundance He has given us. To be surrounded by amazing family and friends; lavished with riches beyond my comprehension; protected at every turn; blessed with abundance and the charity of others; granted the opportunity to live in a free world where I can express my views (and let others express theirs and both be okay); a place where we are daily granted the peace to know that He is watching our future carefully; to have jobs that not only support, but give us freedom to enjoy the riches of the earth and our surroundings; to have Temples; to know of God. All of these blessings and more astound me. How can I be so lucky? How can I ever give back enough to show Him how much I appreciate it?
All I can do is pass it on. I try to. I try hard to show His hand to everyone around me; to give back. I hope my little grain of rice, and our other beautiful children will learn and know this as well. To God I give my thanks. To my family and friends I leave my testimony that He's working for you too. I know it's true. He'll prove it to you too, if you look for Him. This is my miracle.