Gone by Kelly Clarkson

It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me

Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

some nice songs to accompany me thru 2004...
a year i'd seriously forget.. hahaz..
it's a quite a bad year..
not only fer me but fer many other ppl too..
so many sad things happened this year..
juz wanna start afresh, anew in the new year..

Second last day of the yr... how fast time runs..
anw, woke up late fer training today..
hahaz.. it was a slack training..
juz some match to make sure everyone haven't lost their touch..
yesterday went to some hotel to eat buffet lunch..
first time i treat my mom wif the money i earned..
the food was EXTREMELY good... worth the money..
i eat until i was so full i almost vomit out the food..
hahaz.. but the food was soo nice wad..
den went to orchard again...
this time to get my specs..
they helped me change the frame..
it's like brownish-orange now..

kelly's album is fantastic..
one of my favs fer the year, together wif stefanie..
it's no doubt she's got a great voice..
she's versaltile but she choose to make a full rock album..
unlike christina tt opted fer a rojak album..
wif almost any genre inside..
so it's a thumbs up fer kelly!!!

i dun like those too comercial movies..
and the lastest tt i want to watch is
Lemony Snicket's A Series Of Unfortunate Events..
think shawn loh will be interested too..
hahaz.. not much ppl like these type of movies..
like last time The Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind..
these are actually very fascinating movies..
go catch it if u haf the time and money..

finally finished the second and last filming...
a little sad though.. cos it was a real fun experience..
this time we filmed at abg mo kio mrt station..
from mid-nite till like 4 in the morning..
it was a relatively easy shot compared to last time..
the train keep going fron bishan and back.. and on and on..
think i'm really gonna miss this experience...
it's like i juz knew these ppl there..
and i'll never get to see them ever again..
haiz.. tt's life.. juz imagine...
60,000 ppl died in one day juz due to tsunami..
i've never even seen b4 a tsunami..
juz learnt all those stuff from geog text..
but it's really sad lah.. even though i dun noe those ppl..
their family juz died like tt...

got my first pay check also..
first time i earned money leh... haahz..
so went out and bought a bag and a cd..
feelin' good manz...
hahaz.. it's like i earned 2 and a half weeks allowance in 1 nite..
tt's how little money i get each week..
haahz.. i still miss those filming nitez...
and it's definitely not cos of the money...
hope there are more chances again next time...
(fingers crossed>>)

this was one of the best christmas...
spending time wif my loved ones..
and felt happy... yah.. quite a special christmas too..
christmas eve was spent after a long sleep..
was too tired wad.. hahaz...
den went to watch ocean's twelve alone..
it's been a while since i watched a movie alone..
but the movie is sooo cool..
it's actually the chemistry between the actors tt made the film good..
cos it's nothing exciting actually..
there are very little scenes of them stealing...
okay, den went to do a last minute shopping..
luckily got work, otherwise wouldn't haf money to buy le..
bought gifts fer my family.. quite fun la..
cos like buy so many bags...
very seldom got like tt go out and buy things..

den dressed nicely and went fer the church celebration..
no friends came this yr..
but heck la... they dun wan to come also no point forcing them to..
but i got a chance to spend x'mas wif my church frenz..
always kind of dump them for my frenz..
but they are actually the ones tt really loved me alot..
great pals manz.. hahaz.. had a fun party...
and the church performance was a blast..
i had my share of fun.. being the host fo the evening..

after i came home from my frenz 2dae..
went to my aunt hse's fer x'mas lunch..
met my favourite cousin, the cute galen..
muz post his pictures one day...
den went to a mother's ex-colleage hse fer dinner party..
the hse is sooo big.. the ground size is like 2 times weiming's hse..
they even haf a lift inside their hse..
like a bungalow.. beautiful place..

lastly i gotta thank those whu sent me cards..
keng phang, camillus, yi yun and alaric..
thanks a lot!!

finally returned from the filming...
it's soooo fun... even if it's juz a extra...
it took so long juz to film a simple scene...
they started like 2 in the midnite n filmed till 10 in the morning..
so long juz fer one scene...
but it's real cool... acting...
hahaz... guess i like it third, after singing and dancing...
even though it's tiring, but i really enjoyed it...

it's christmas soon... my favourite holiday...
received first 2 cards today...
thanks yy, ur card is very nice and creative...
thanks samuel, didn't expect u to send anything.. but ur e-card is cool..
hahaz.. christmas eve tmr...
hopefully i can celebrate it wif the ppl i love..
even though maybe not wif friends...
but i'm sure my family will always be there..

heys... went to some old folks' centre 2dae..
some cip thingy... quite okay la...
juz very slack.. sit ard here and there...
tok to some of them.. okay, maybe not really tok..
juz say elloz.. and have a nice day..
hahaz.. den went to eat dinner..
den went home and sleep le..
cos later gonna be an extra fer a movie..
hahaz.. branz always have this type of film stuffs..
coolies.. i like it!! hahaz..
still can earn some money also..
but the time is quite bad lor..
all nite thru till morning..
tmr morning still got training leh..
hopefully i have the energy to do it..
cos still got class gathering at noon..
and some family dinner or church rehersals at nite..
busy rite??? tt's my christmas..
anw it's not like anybody is asking me out this christmas..
might as well do somethings instead of stoning at home..
hey ppl, u've must have receive the christnas cards le..
go fer the church celebration leh... hahaz..
the drama is quite good this time..
cos they will have to use their own voice this time..
no more pre-recorded le..
merry christmas everyone!!!

All I Want For Christmas Is You

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true...
All I want for ChristmasI
s you...

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you...
You baby

I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeer click'
Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight
What more can I do
Baby all I want for Christmas is you
You...

All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need -
won't you please bring my baby to me...

Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just want to see baby
Standing right outside my door
Oh I just want him for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is
You...

This is the moment, my final test
Destiny beckoned, I never reckoned second best
I won't look down, I must not fall
This is the moment, the sweetest moment of them all

i love the above song by taufik.. hahaz..
training again.. tiring sia.. but fun..
gotta plan thur's training somemore.. hahaz..
almost watched movie..
but y shld i pay to watch a movie when i got vouchers to watch fer free..
so decided not to watch.. haahz..
gotta save the money fer my bag wad...
haiz.. sent out the x'mas cards..
but made a mistake (i hope only 1 mistake)..
switched yiyang and samuel's cards..
hahaz.. sorry hor...

lastest series of pics.. to fit e angry mood.. 

i am angry... hahaz..
maybe now when i'm writing this entry..
not at anyone la... juz angry..
wanna sing angry songs... linkin park..
kelly's new song also can.. hahaz..
tired la... one busy day...
ran sooo long 2dae...
yah... x'mas coming le..
but i've got a feelin' this x'mas is gonna be bad..
let's juz wait and see..

Breaking The Habit by Linkin Park

Memories concern
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume
I'm safer in my room
Unless I try to start again

I don't want to be the one
Who battles always choose
Cuz inside I realize
That I'm the one confused

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit tonight

Cultured my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I have no options left again

I'll paint it on the walls
Cuz I'm the one that falls
I'll never fight again
and this is how it ends

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
to show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So, I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Breaking the habit tonight

did nothing much in the morning..
basically watching vcds, going online and writting x'mas cards..
ya.. den went fer the hockey chalet..

dunno where it was.. so met up wif lubin..
so farnie.. we changed the meeting place sooo many times..
finally meet alr den went to bugis...
but cannot find the correct bus stop...
after walking ard almost all of the bus stops ard bugis junction,
finally found the bus stop to take 197..
den when we reach, we dunno how to walk..
walked one whole big round..
to the left, den we found out it is at the extreme right...
walk back all the way again...
in the end took 3 hrs to get there..
haha.. only spend an hour there b4 i left..
nothing much la.. and i feel tt the gals and seniors dun really like me..
hahaz.. they juz dun bother abt..
like i wasn't there or smth..
nvm, at least there's lubin, yazz, kwok ley and dom..
on my way back i met basil...
wad a coincidence... amybe singapore is really tt small..
hahaz.. took only 45 mins to get back..
wad a big difference...

want to watch Ocean's Twelve tmr...
dun think anybody is interested la..
most prob watch the movie myself lor..
since got the voucher..

St andrew cathedral.... very beautiful.. 

my group at the christian camp..

hahaz.. wanted to get a job..
but in the end... dun want liao...
cos i only got like 3 more weeks...
i dun think i want to work all the 3 weeks away...
still gotta do homeowork leh..
dunno wad homework also.. didn't receive the worksheets..

favourite songs of the year (not according to merit)..

3. Lose My Breath by Destiny's Child
this song makes me dance manz... hahaz..
go crazy.. highly addictive...

4. Wo De Ai by Sun Yan Zi
another sad song... very nice k song...
although i dun really like stef.. but this song rocks!!

5. What Are You Waiting For? by Gwen Stefani
super dance track.. makes me move my body...
and the chorus plays in my head continuously..

6. Fly by Hilary Duff
this started off as xuanwei's fav song...
well.. after listening to it.. i became hooked as well..

7. Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson
i toatally love this song... especially the lyrics...
one day i will breakaway too... hahaz.. hopefully..

8. Ta Hai Shi Bu Dong by S.H.E
my favourite sad song in the first half of the year...
it's really sad when the person u love juz doesn't know ur love..

tt's all i can think of...
hey peeps.. if u're free on the 24th dec..
christmas eve.. pls come down to my church..
got some celebration- performance..
yups... juz inform me if ya interested..
otherwise i'll juz come after u!!!
hahaz..
i

well... went training today... physical.. damn tiring..
den left fer piano lessons... den home the rest of the time..
making christmas cards and lazing around...
haahz.. tired leh... especially the training... muscles gonna cramp le..
anw.. watched star awards last nite...
long time since i watched it live...
was quite happy wif the results...
but dun really like zoe's clothes tt nite..

Since the yr is coming to an end..
i'll choose out some of my favourite songs this yr...
(not according to any order of merit)

1. Wo Men De Ai by F.I.R
sad song... beautifully written...
makes u feel like u're being drown by e sad atmosphere..

2. Lydia by F.I.R
F.I.R is definitely one of the most successful acts this yr...
this song is also quite enpowering...
telling u can be strong even if ur love left u...

tt's fer 2dae... more song tmr..
hahaz.. cos i wanna eat dinner le...
ciao..

i'm back after 2 weeks... hahaz..
and update of where i was the past 2 weeks..
was at my church camp from last monday to friday..
den went to malasia from saturday to this monday..
den went to another christian camp at trinity theological college (ttc)..
from tues to fri... yups..!!
quite fun.. especially the m'sia trip and the second camp..
i got a dorm all by myself at ttc..
the food there is also damn nice...
most importantly i learnt alot from the few days there...
hope i can really use wad i learn..

yay!! christmas is coming up....
my favourite festival of the year...
firstly cos it's a festive full of LOVE...
i like loving and being loved..
secondly, it's abt jesus coming to earth...
wad could be better than tt... hahaz..

went fer the 4-4 gathering today...
got so many ppl.. met up wif some old frenz...
really cool... watched singapore idol, which i miss due to camp..
mrs neo was there too.. wif nina...
den basically juz tok ard there and play cards and haf fun...
miss u guys... maybe not really tt much..
maybe only some.. hahaz.. so bad...
hey bad it's the truth wad..

"Love means knowing when to let go...."

well, never really understood wad this phrase means until 2dae..
it's quite hard to understand y u wld let the person u love go..
but when u love someone...
it's abt putting the person in front of urself...
doing wad is best fer the person instead of wad is best fer u..
even if it means letting go...
ppl change, place change, interest change...
so sometimes you can never be the best fer the person any more..
it's better to let go... and wish them all the best..

Nothing Hurts Like Love by Daniel Bedingfield

Broken hearts, broken dreams,
They're just some things love brings
When you learn that its all the lie you cry
You find out
Nothing,
Nothing,
Nothing
Hurts like love
Nothing brings your heart so much pain

a wound may hurt...
but it'll get better in a few moments..
but heartache last fer a long time..
a simple memory can bring u so much pain..
and the memory juz come and go...
so many times a day...
like stabbing u sooo many times a day.. over and over again

watched the incredibles wif xw today...
nice movie... cannot really remember wad i saw..
it was toooo damn cold lor...
but i like it la... hahaz...
and so weird.. didn't tok abt the movie at all after came out..
hahz.. but going church camp le...
so it's like my last day going out...
den went fer training and it was good and tiring as usual..

haahz.. trying to find a job these days..
but the camps screw up my whole time-table..
i cannot start work until 10 dec..
tt's like only 3 weeks left la..
so sick and tired of even thinking abt tt...
ask ppl to go they also dun wan...
so sad... dun want to accompany me... hahaz..
wadever... at least daniel is helping me to find a job too..
hopefully i can make it.. hahaz...
tt's the difference btw old frenz and new frenz..
he knows the person tt i am like...
there's a sense of trust... and he knows i wishes the best fer him..
and i wun try to steal his job or smth...

serious wondering abt a few adult questions these days..
oh no.. like grow old le.. hahaz...
all those children, death, genes topics...
made the already greyed world more grey...
sometimes it's better to look at everything from a child's perspective..
simple, plain, innocent... wadever...

reading a book "Man and Boy"..
abt a single father and his child..
hahaz.. suddenly feel tt being an single parent is quite fun..
okay.. maybe not fun... but an interesting life..

haiz.. the church camps are coming up..
2 church camps over 2 weeks and a holiday in between..
it's like 2 weeks gone juz like tt...
luckily i made a deal tt i can leave the camp when i've got trn..
at least got training... but cannot go out after the trn le..
and i cannot make frenz go fer the camps wif me..
so sad.. got to be like alone..
but also quite selfish la.. ask them to go juz to accompany me..
i where got sooo impt to them...
yah.. they are not even my parents or wadever....
y muz think of only wad i want... hahaz..
too bad la.. tt's smth i gotta get over by myself...

oh ya.. did i mention my obsessions wif raffles??
hahaz.. starting to really regret not going to RJC le..
I cannot think of a reason to be in NJC now...
really wished tt i had went to raffles instead..
the worse thing is tt i actually can go there..
but was too stupid to let the chance slip...
then now my sis also cannot go RGS..
haiz.. maybe it's juz fated tt my family cannot haf any link wif the Raffles..
wow.. quite a long entry..
ok then.. stop le..

very sianz day..
really feel like isolating myself from the whole world..
stay shut in my hse.. my room..
juz read the whole day thru...
but still went to a church frenz hse warming BBQ..
quite nice place... ya..
weird feeling these days..
only like to wear plain simple white clothes..
feel uncomfortable when i imagine myself in other colours..
maybe cos the whole world is so screwed up..
wanna juz chill out and live simple isolated life..
hahaz.. makes me think of "the voice within" again..
hmmm... wadever..

juz watched the repeat telecast of singapore idol...
i always not home on fridays... cannot see the result shows..
need xuan wei to tell me the results all the time.. hahaz..
well, think the result shows are too saddening leh..
juz now watched leandra out.. feel quite sad also..
guess it's best tt i didn't watch la...
too emotional le...

雨后的城市　寂寞又狼狈
路边的座位　它空着在等谁

我拉住时间　它却不理会
有没有别人　跟我一样很想被安慰

风　停了又吹　我忽然想起谁
天　亮了又黑　我过了好几岁
心　暖了又灰　世界　又时候　孤单的很
需要另一个同类

爱　收了又给　我们都不太完美
梦　作了又碎　我们有几次机会　去追

云在半空中　被微风剪碎
回忆也许美　可是正在飞走　对不对

waste my time 2dae...
trn from 8-11, ne stuff at 1, piano at 4...
it's like 3 hrs between each lor..
i was seriously wondering wad to do in between..
worse thing is tt sch is between my hse and piano place..
so tired from travelling all these distance..
haahz.. gotta rest..
ciao..

hahaz.. went pitch training today.. totally drained..
even cramped after i got back..
met ali also.. first time training got coach since start of new season..
anw.. went out after tt... quite sianz..
dun feel like bringing up the matter again...
den went to meet up wif ala, dom, mel and branz..
only a short while la.. den went home..
den when i slpt, i dreamed an interesting dream...
i was watching a concert... and jay chow was sitting close by in front..
den i was toking to a kid in front of me..
telling him tt i feel soo happy tt jay is so near me..
and this was passed all the way to him..
and he turned ard.. and very friendly...
tell me "me too, me too"...
shaking me hand and shuffle my hair...
like we were frenz like tt... i feel soo excited..
cos it's like i dun really like jay after he got popular...
i feel tt he is more and more distant...
unlike last time where he seems more real and sincere..
suddenly feel like sooo close and friendly to him again..
hahaz... den i reminded myself tt i have to work towards him...
he is my role mode... ya... gotta work hard...
hahaz.. felt much better liao..

Went fer hockey today... so little ppl went for it..
only 6... anw.. tmr is pitch training.. yay.. sooo fun..
after which we went to cineleisure for lunch..
ate pasta-mania for the first time.. soo exxx...
den watched a movie.. "Taxi"..
very funny.. alot better than "The Princess's Diary 2"..
quite enjoyable... even though i wanted to watch "The Forgotten" more..
den went to P.S. and the other guys played arcade...
hahaz.. i still dunno how to play those games..
juz sit ard and watch lor.... den shopped ard orchard..
so fun.. going out and play...

hmmm.. these days dun feel like updating the blog..
maybe cos i feel happier these days..
weird, dun feel like blogging when i'm happy..
haahz.. also cos i always come home over mid-nights lah..
too tired to update also...
well, went fer silkpro cip today.. sianz..
like flag day.. asking fer donation on the streets... yucks..
still thinking if i want to do it again tmr..
if got frenz do wif me den not tt bad la..
and tmr got trn again... finally.. waited so long fer it..
competition coming liao... really want to practice more..

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me everyday...

1. i like plants.. got a mini garden outside my house.. but i always got not much time fer the plants... so they look quite messy...

2. my way of relieving stress is by eating, singing or crying... i will do the same when i feel bad or sad... juz eat eat eat, sing sing sing or cry cry cry... hahaz... so if u see me doing those... well, guess u'll know smth is wrong wif me..

3. on second tots.. u'll probably never see me cry... only 1% of my crying is done in public... most of the time i will juz do it b4 i slp... hahaz... sometimes i cry almost every night... but when i go out.. i'll be tt super-happy person... it's not tt i have mood swings.. it's juz tt i dun wan others to worry abt me... =p

Family day.... yups...
went out wif my family all thru the day..
went to west coast fer breakfast-lunch...
den went to see the new hse.. which is juz opposite the park..
cool.. ready by mid next yr..
den went to plaza singapura, wanting to watch movie..
ended up buying a book and swimming trunks..
den went fer swimmimng...
aiyo, stamina drop again...
hahaz.. den went to dinner...
lookin forward to hockey tmr...
i wanna play hockey sooooo badly..
hahaz...

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me everyday...

1. my favourite sports are swimmimg, table tennis and hockey.... and my least favourite sports are soccer... no interest in it at all... hahahz...

2. i spent most of my weekends at the church... fellowship on saturday from 430 to 630, staying back for dinner if nobody ask me out.... sunday sch from 9 to 1030, den got worship all the way to 1230... usually eat lunch opposite... if got meetings den will have to go home only after 5...

3. i took on the leadership role in the youth fellowship these 2 yrs... but felt quite useless... like i did not do my job well.. cannot really lead the whole fellowship well... hahaz.. anyway will finally be changing my post next yr and it's my last yr in the fellowship also..

finally a day tt i not tt dull... or moody...
at least i did smth today...
decided to do the library cip today..
quite effective to use the time and get cip hours also..
juz arrange the books..
tough job.. but at least take my mind off other things..
earned 3hrs and 45mins.. haahz..
den my mom bought stefanie and A*mei's cd fer me..
yay!! hahaz... too bad cannot play hockey tmr...
totally fell in love wif it... hockey rulz!!
next week got the silkpro cip...
3 days, 4hrs a day from 1400-1800... 12 hrs altogether..
cool.. better to settle my cip hours this yr..
concentrate on studies next yr...

站在最顶端上，却失去光芒
曾留下的痕迹，我却无法想象
一个人的勇敢，能和谁分享
喜悦后的悲伤，在没人的地方
深呼吸继续往上

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me everyday...

1. i LOVE music... pop, ballad, hip-hop, R&B... anything... currently me heart is wif 2 songs... 55%-wo de ai by sun yan zi... 45%-lose my breath by destiny's child... totally different songs... wo de ai always make me cry.. lose my breath makes me dance..

2. i am sentimental... miss things easily... still miss the cat high days even after like 1 whole yr... now also miss a little bit of NJ days.. the ppl lah maybe... cannot see so many ppl fer 2 mths...

3. i dun believe anything is impossible... i believe i can do anything once i put my heart into it... it's all in the mind... change the mindset and accomplish anything...

i think i finally know why i am so sad these days...
it muz be due to the fact tt the holidays started...
cannot see my frenz now... tt's y i feel so lonely...
went fer OGL interview today... suddenly dun feel like being one...
dunno y also... maybe due to my mood these days...
everything also means nothing to me liao...
haiz... nvm lah.. 4get it...

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me everyday...

1. i dun like to go out in groups... feel like i'm not needed there anw... prefer to go in two, followed by going alone... den going in a group... it's juz like their concentration will be divided into so many areas when there are so many ppl...

2. i have 5 pairs of shoes at home... 2 that is white base stripes, 2 sports shoes and 1 vintage looking shoe...

3. i like to watch romantic movies... but always ended up sad cos i have never been in a relationship... only can watch but cannot experience...

nothing to do in the morning so went to sch early...
dunno y i did that also... to think of it, it's so moron...
i'm not the person going fer op wad...
then asked jordan to come sch earlier and watched a vcd he brought..
he's really a nice person... hahaz.. juz came sch early to accompany me..
cos i was dead bored... den after which did pt...
16 rounds we ran today... 6.4km... wow..
totally soaked in sweat after tt... and i dun have a extra t-shirt...
i really dun feel like going with tt shirt and a headache..
but when xuan wei asked me to.. i juz dunno how to say "no"..
haizz.. wondered y go also.. nv eat anything...
basically juz trying to make myself transparent...
feeling damn cold.. from the wet shirt.. and the headache..
luckily they decided to leave quite early...

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me everyday...
1. CCA: track and field(pri & sec), hockey (jc)
2. Fav subject: chemistry, history, chinese
3. Way of showing/receiving love: spending time and touch (pls dun think dirrty..hahaz)

i think i really got to explain the third fact...
it's juz tt there are serveral ways where ppl will feel loved...
it is also there way of showing love...
the five main ways are.. 1-time, 2-presents, 3-touch, 4-words...
and it happened tt i am equally between touch and time..
yah.. it's like a phycological test... hahaz...
haizz.. the week finally ending...
dunno shld be happy or not...
like wasted a week liao... but it's soo sianz also..
though there are quite some happy days (trn and going to jordan's place)
there are many unhappy things happening also (dun wanna think abt it)
hopefully can start new week afresh...
and go to someone's hse again... hahaz....

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me each day...
1. Fav singers: Christina Aguilera, Sammi Cheng, Kit Chan
2. Fav actor/actress: Nicole Kidman, Collin Farrell
3. Fav mood: sad, sorrow

well... did nothing today....
stayed at home the whole day i suppose...
everyone is busy doing their pw...
and i'm so free....
wad's the use.. might as well have op at same date as them..
more time to prepare anw...
haizz... maybe i'll go out window-shopping alone later...
hahaz.. no money to buy anything le..
have to save up fer christmas presents...
oh ya... and christmas cards...
maybe can spend time making it since so free..
haahz..

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me each day...
1. Fav food: chocolate, french fries, peanutbutter, eggs
2. Fav pet: dogs, fishes
3. Fav shopping centre: Junction 8, Heeren, Plaza Singapura

My idol chart this week...

1. Olinda Cho (was moved by her first song... touched.. if only she could sing more... but second song like keep repeating...)

2. Muhammad Taufik bin Batisah (quite even 2 songs... he's good at R&B manz...)

3. Sylvester Sim (ok performance.. but the second song quite some parts off tune... sweating fer him.. not an easy song leh)

4. Daphne Khoo (not a very strong voice... ok lah.. but she come quite far in the competition liao..)

5. Leandra Veronica Rasiah (dun really know if daphne is worse or her.. abt the same lah.. her first song sounds weak... second is better.. but not tt much..)

went out wif my mom today... free wad..
quite a boring day lah... hahaz..

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me each day..
Schools: Ai Tong Primary, Catholic High School, National Junior College
Family: 1 mother, 1 father, 2 sisters (sec3 and pri 6)
Tel: 62895833 (r), 96804004 (hp)

Wow... coolies day...
went to jordan's hse.... saw the dog (see above)..
soooooo cute... really enjoyed being there..
he was a great host... even when he got op tmr..
thanks manz... really made my day...
played ard with tuffy... and he nv bit me... hahaz..
den watched VCD... nice show...
really enjoy going to other ppl's hse...
it's interesting to see the place frenz live...
the whole hse... maybe i will try to find more hse to go to..
hahaz...

ABOUT ME>>>
let ppl know 3 facts abt me each day..
Name: Yap Wei Xuan Joel
Age: 17 yrs, 7mths old
Address: some flat in Serangoon

slacking day.... all day...
watched vcds and laze ard till trn..
so little ppl came today.. only 4...
den one left and another one came...
but the trn was good... fun... learnt new things...
it's sad tt there are no more trn this whole week..
ppl juz dun get commited to hockey..
dunno y also... even those exco...
and yazeed is trying so hard to get ppl coming...
feel so bad fer him... so i always go.... hahaz..
hope the others understand too...
we are really quite behind the others..
gotta train.. no choice...

Not really as good a day as i expected it to be...
dunno y i dun feel happy at all tt pw is over...
it's not cos i thinking of pw and feel sad it's over...
it's juz the other factor tt made me feel rather down today...
well the op was smooth running... it's quite ok till the question..
wad a stupid question...
ask me to name a doctor tt proved aromatherapy has healing effect..
like i can name one lah... haiz...
after tt already sianz half...
den some good fren started the tell-u-half-and-dun tell-the-rest thing again..
it affects me not cos of others comments abt me or wadever..
but juz the fact tt he dun wan to tell me...
i juz cannot stand this type of feeling tt a gd fren is hiding smth from me..
it's soooo rotten... and he is not the first person whu did it..
it juz makes me feel like he can't trust me...
and i always feel tt trust is wad differentiate frenz from good frenz..
haiz... den cannot go and see the husky cos jordan got pw..
totaly sian until dunno wad liao.. stone ard fm 1 to 4..
very bit of sad, angry, helpless emotion fill the 3 hrs..
luckily got the trn... the only part tt i felt happy the whole day..
play in the rain... den went out dinner after tt..

tmr is the big day le...
finally after 6 mths everything will be completed...
finished the gpf juz now..
wad a sense of satisfaction...
sooo thick... hahaz.. tt's nt the point...
hope will do well tmr.. gotta do well..
after tt maybe going to see jordan's husky..
can't wait... i finally get to see husky leh..
hahaz.. so exciting... maybe got pw celebration also..
but haf to go back to sch by 4 fer trn...
another physical... hopefully can catch up wif the others..
hahaz... den going dinner again with the hockey peeps..
wad a day... hopefully it will be as good as it seems..
wish me luck!!!

Wad a day.... the first time i went to sch so late on weekdays..
had a lot of sleep... hahaz..
and the temperature is sooooo good and chilling...
raining since the previous day...
dun even feel like waking up..
went to sch fer pw and stuff... quite alot to do..
den went to piano... but the funny thing happened..
i forgot my piano books...
i was like so close to my teacher's hse b4 i found out..
ended up having lessons instead of doing theory...
went back fer trn...
it's weird tt i nv even tot of skipping a single trn..
not like last time in track where i only train 2 mths a yr..
maybe i like hockey more...hahaz..
but everyone is improving soooo fast..
and i'm lagging soooo behind...
feel damn frustrated at times...
feel like juz smashing the stick onto the floor....
how come i'm not gifted in sports...
haiz... all sports like CMI...
only swimming and table tennis still ook..
really leh... it's like those u wan to do smth abt it..
but cannot... very frustrating..
yah.. hahaz...

Fly
Open up the part of you that wants to hide away
You can shine,
Forget about the reasons why you cant in life,
And start to try, cause it's your time,
Time to fly.

All your worries, leave them somewhere else,
Find a dream you can follow,
Reach for something, when there's nothing left,
And the world's feeling hollow.

And we're you're down and feel alone,

And want to run away,

Trust yourself and don't give up,

You know you better than anyone else

most touching scene in "yesterday once more"... 

Finally watched the film "yesterday once more"...
got sammi... she looks prettier and prettier each time..
the story is also quite interesting...
but maybe the plot is a little bit weak..
did not really feel tt touched...
but quite funny seeing how they try to pit against each other..
and the love theme is so close to heart...
real love is when you can give everything to tt person..
and only ask fer the person to be happy...
it's like you have absolutely no control of urself...
a little selfish also... jealous if others get close to tt person..
and most importantly... nothing beats love..
no money... no jewellery... even the thing you like most..
everything means nothing at all....
if tt person is not ard...
yah.... so sweet... hahaz...

well... crappy day... nothing much to do in sch also..
got back the comment for the piano exam..
crap also.. basically say i must improve my technique..
hahaz... izzit tt asking me to practise more..
wadever... missed the first part of the idols show also...
so this week my idols chart also dunno how to write..
but i'll juz rank them anw..

1. Maia Lee (getting better and better each week... you rock this week gal)

2. Olinda Cho (look weird in dress but daring enough to try it out... pitch and tone perfect again as usual.... always so consistant... the best singer..)

3. Sylvester Sim (not really impressed or anything... but better than last week.. dunno y.. kind of not liking his music more and more each week)

4. Daphne Khoo (missed this performance... but she sang Xtina's song... haahz... must be not tt good lah... i think tt's wad the judges tell her too... Xtina's songs are the hardest to sing lor)

5. Christopher Michael Lee (big improvement.. nv really hear the whole performance... but quite good i think...)

6. Muhammad Taufik bin Batisah (missed his performance as well... dun think he sang well this week.. sounds quite bad... hmm...)

7. Leandra Veronica Rasiah (not impressed again... dunno she is the worst this week or Taufik... either one of them lah...)

another pic.. not so clear.. 

finally handed in the written report today..
wad a relief... waited for the written report till over 12 yesterday..
hahaz.. now it's all abt the op liao...
very weird feeling going to sch these days..
dunno go there fer wad... the teachers are all so secretive..
so dunno wad they're doing... and it's so sianzzz...
but poning sch is sooooo not me... like dunno how to do it...
luckily got hockey and stuff... smth more meaningful..
haizz... wonder how many things i will fail this yr...
maybe it's complacency... dunno lah...
dun feel like doing anything anytime anyday...
wad's wrong.... hope this 2 weeks can get over soon..
at least i can still see a road ahead after all these stuff is over..
be it promoted or retained... at least i have a clearer vision..
and can plan... yup..
ciaoz

sad...sad....sad....sad....sad....sad....sad....sad....sad....
i failed my piano exam....
received the msg when i was at Plaza Singapura..
right after i finish cutting my hair...
and juz seconds b4 i met weiming...
luckily he was there manz...
hahaz.. haiz... sort of expected this result liao..
but this is definitely not the worse thing tt cld happen to me..
i have a very high chance of doing real bad fer promos...
dun wanna think abt it..
got so much hw and pw to do...
juz now the trn also very off form..
quite disappointed... if i play like tt..
i most probably wun make the first team..
maybe not even the sub-team... so diu lian..
where got exco cannot get into team...
haiz... gotta do maths liao..
ciao..

starting to feel like i'm not gonna make it thru j1...
shitty feeling... very down... very lost...
suddenly it feels soooooo close and real tt wad i fear is abt to become a reality..
haahz... to think i keep asking ppl not to think so pessimistic..
but luckily me parednts are quite cool abt it...
told them how i felt and they were still ok...
at least for now... maybe they dun really think i'll have to redo j1..
yah.. and the op is sooo near liao..
dunno is lucky or not... i'm on the first day...
less time to prepare.... but more time to play...
actually also nothing to play lah...
all the frenz all like on the last 2 days... haiz...
yah.. gotta plan carefully my holidays...
dunno can get the attachment or not...
think most likely wun get it lah...
nvm... as the saying goes... life goes on...
yup... comfort myself.. wadever...

我最爱的还是我以前的老公，因为他总会把最好的留给我
go catch this movie by sammi and andy now!!...

my chart of favourite idols this week...

1. Muhammad Taufik bin Batisah (surprise, surprise.. juz when i tot all the guys are gonna sing out of tune this guy here did a fantastic job!!)

2. Daphne Khoo (consistant... steady... and getting better each week.. keep it up!!)

3. Olinda Cho (another consistant person... good job.. dun like ur image still... probabaly will nv like it also anw... but you have a good voice..)

4. Maia Lee (nothing special... sounded like a pirated A*mei... vocals nah..)

5. Sylvester Sim (wad happened manz.. you were like my fav last week... the whole last part out of tune... and pls stop saying this is not ur genre.. u've gotta be versatile)

6. Leandra Veronica Rasiah (no confidence at all.. like you dunno wad u're singing..)

7. Jerry Ong (first time he is not at the bottom of the list.. but still he really CMI)

8. Christopher Michael Lee (yucks.. totally disgusting... hey i actually dislike him more than jerry this week)

OMG..... my loneliness is really getting the better of me...
to think i actually wanted to marry a dog today...
wad a joke... but i really love a husky...
my fav. type of dog.....
suddenly i know y i like dogs so much....
cos they will always be there fer me...
it's like a fren so close tt is like a brother....
hahaz... too lonely lah.... seriously...
dunno if other ppl also feel the same....
well, i'm sure definitely not dominic.... hahaz..
lucky boi... so good got someone there always fer him..
sometimes i feel i shld juz anyhow grab one person liao...
but cannot so despo lah...
tt's y dogs will make such a good campanion...
at least they are loyal... hahaz...
die liao lah.. y i keep thinking of dogs..=p
even the most simple love songs and movies can make me feel so sad now...
tt shouldn't be the way wad....
haiz.... it goes to show lonely can make a person cranky..

当你孤单你会想起谁

你的心情总在飞　什么事都想去追　想抓住一点安慰　

你总是喜欢在人群中徘徊　你最害怕孤单的滋味

你的心那么脆　一碰就会碎　经不起一点风吹

你的身边总需要许多人陪　你最害怕每天的天黑

但是天总会黑　人总要离别　谁也不能永远陪谁

而孤单的滋味　谁都要面对　不只是你我会感觉到疲惫

当你孤单你会想起谁　你想不想找个人来陪

你的快乐伤悲　只有我能体会　让我再陪你走一回

i juz deleted the previous post...
i was too angry juz now lah...
dun really mean wad i say de...
i take back some of my words...
i hope he dun fail his promos lah...
he most probably will do well...
yah... sorry lah... hope you didn't see the post...
but still i think wad i say is quite rite...
you really treat me bad wad....
aiya... nvm...gotta get used to it...
but i really hope you can stop treating ppl this way...
especially me... i have absolutely no motives wad so ever lah...
and i dun have a big mouth lor...
hahaz..

speech day 2004 

came back from cat high.... wad a great day...
damn slack also... didn't even go fer any lessons...
went to cat high a little while after assembly...
met wif some teachers and chatted fer a while..
den went to eat lunch at j8 with samuel...
the western food very delicious and yummy...
den later went back fer prize-giving...
wow... so happy and proud of melvin and 4-4...
guess we really did well fer the "o"s...
11.1 leh... tt's like the best in dunno how many yrs...
and the suah speak english... so weird...
and his mandrin so chim... all use 2 chen yu in every line..
haahz... so funny...
too bad only got a few classmates came today...
suddenly feel like it is only a small proportion of the class tt came today...
but still it's fun lah... even when not all the ppl are there...
melvin rich liao lor... haahz... muz treat hor...
but u deserve it lah.. dunno how u managed to do so much in sch..
like u got so much more time den everyone...
but ur speech is very touching also..
the chinese part... exactly how i feel too...
yah... gotta do pw liao...
like fer the whole of the next mth...
hahaz..
ciao...

yea... going back to cat high again tmr...
really very happening these days...
alaric crashed yesterday... play in the games fest...
den there's table tennis and frisbee...
soooo many games...
anything is nice beside studying...
den went out to watch resident evil yesterday also..
finally gotta watch the movie... it's ok only lah..
not like very nice or wad...
yah.. and today slack also... walking ard the sch...
toking... but later the 4-4 peeps got gathering...
too bad lah.. went out yesterday liao..
cannot go out so soon... they will enjoy it one lah..
hahaz... yups...
tt's all...
ciao..

When can i finally go out...
always got things one leh... so sianz..
today got church till like 1 and den meetin' to like 5..
soooo long lor..
like whole day in church liao..
hahaz.. even yy and those ppl also cannot wait fer me le..
so sian leh these few days... always stay at home one..
if only can get ppl to go out....
but i so busy also... hmmmm....
hahaz... lookin' forward to those class outing...
go anywhere lah... frenz also...
so long nv go out liao (besides the lunch at thompson)..
haahz..yeah...

y am i feeling so empty inside??!!
izzit the sadness or the numbness??!!
have i gotten so used to this feelin' ..
tt i no longer feel the pain??!!
wadever... wad do you see after forever??
is there even forever in da first place...
no wonder i always like the song below..
always a little tinge of sadness...
once smth is gone..
it will be lost forever..
it will never return to the state b4...
and there muz be all these regrets tt we have in life..
things tt are way beyond our control...
outta our grip...
but we stupid humans try all means..
and hold tightly to all these things..
even though we know it will never be coming back..
wishing for a hope tt is as good as none..

Have you ever loved and lost somebody....
Wished there was a chance to say I'm sorry...
Can't you see, that's the way I feel about you and me..
Have you ever felt your heart was breaking...
Lookin down the road you should be taking....
I should know, cos I loved and lost the day I let you go.....
Even though the moment's gone, I'm still holding on somehow..
Wishing I could change the way the world goes round..

.

It's official... Singapore Idol sux big time...
actually they can change the rulz..
to let the lousiest stay in the competiton..
tt wld be more fair... jerry can be the last one standing..
and he can compete in world idol with leah (the first one out of AI3)
it's a shitty game lor...
jeassea gone, david gone, beverly gone..
these 3 are my predicted top 4 leh..
whu goes next?! slyvester?!
and this is a singing competition leh..
not a "my religion have more supporters than yours" competition..
i feel really sick even when i'm a christian also..
please have some music sense...

another beautiful song...
jeassea sang this last week...
haiz.. miss her lots..
ahahz... anw.. love will lead her back..
hopefully..

Love Will Lead You Back

saying good bye is never an easy thing
but you never said you'd stay forever
so if you must go darling i'll set you free
but in time i know we will be together

i won't try to stop you from leaving
'coz in my heart i know

chorus
love will lead you back
someday i just know that
love will lead you back to my arms
where you belong
i'm sure sure as the stars are shining
one day you will find me again
and it won't be long
love will lead you back

one of these nights oh
i'll hear your voice again
you're gonna say how much you miss me
you'll walk out this door
but someday you'll walk back in
darling i know i know this will be
sometimes it takes some time on your own now
to find your way back home

chorus

i won't try to stop you now from leaving
'coz in my heart i know oh

chorus

有时星星暗

每颗星星　有只小小手
牵著每个小孩慢慢走
关于梦想　我总追求
因为总有个你让我　随时回头

从来不将感谢说出口
但我记得谁陪我最久
从来跌倒都不说痛
因为抬头就能看到　你的笑容

哦朋友　你像天边那北斗星
带领我勇敢向前走
我的朋友　你总默默地给了我力量
去将失落穿透
而我忘记了　星星也有愁

每颗星都有暗淡时候
其实星星也须要朋友
别让眼泪沉默地流
让我也能　学会为你　守候

不要独自躲在迷雾后
让我寻回你坚强眼眸
让我看到在你心中
最初的孩子　握住朋友不放手

哦朋友　你像天边那北斗星
曾带我勇敢向前走
我的朋友　现在让我来带给你力量
去将失落穿透
有时星星暗　有时星星亮
星暗的时候　让我陪你走

Well well well.... it's idols days again..
i really miss seeing jeassea... where is she??!!
yea yea.. she's out... never coming back..
well wadever.. the show will go on..
so i will list my wish placing of idols every week..
yup... it will depend on their performance..
and how much i like them.. (so jerry will always be at the bottom no matter wad)
haahz..

this week.. top 9

1. Sylvester Sim (u rock manz..!!)

2. Maia Lee (your best performance.. look hot!!)

3. Daphne Khoo (original... and nice look..)

4. David Yeo (a little too crazy... muz tone down a bit..)

5. Leandra Veronica Rasiah (best singer after jeassea left..)

6. Olinda Cho (good voice.. but image.. haiz.. not your fault)

7. Muhammad Taufik bin Batisah (ok lah.. juz dun realy like..)

8. Christopher Michael Lee (wad's he singing?!)

And lastly without a doubt..

9. Jerry Ong (get out please)

finally can post liao... dunno wad happened..
ok.. update on wad i did today..
finished the last of the papers..
think this is the better of the papers i did fer the promos..
den went out with S21 to Marche...
so EEEXXXXpensive... luckily i didn't spend much..
otherwise not cds and movies liao..
hahaz.. den rot all the way at home..
dun feel like watching movie today leh..
it's like using finish all my money on one day..
how am i gonna survive the rest of the holidays..
hahaz...

The first song i wrote.. hahaz..
must give me comments hor..

"Homework" byChristina Aguilera
(feat. Missy Elliott)

Ooh, do do do do do do do
homework , homework
Ooh, do do do do do do do
homework , home work

(Yeah, let's drop it on 'em like this)

Ooh, do do do do do do, na na na ah, ooh
Ooh, do do do do do do, na na na ah, ooh

You might not ever get A’s, ha
Let me tell you it's better than slacking away
There ain't no telling what you might get
A beautiful "A" or maybe a lousy "E"

Doing all my homework (oh oh, yeah yeah)
All the homework , yeah (ooh, yeah yeah)
All the homework (sing it with me now)
Doing all my homework, yeah(Oh, oh)

Come October the work gets kind of hard
This ain't no place to be if you're planning on being a slacker
The promos are coming too
And the teachers always mind if you're acting like a fool

Doing all my homework (oh oh, yeah yeah)
All the homework , yeah (ooh ooh ooh)
All the homework (ow said, now come and work it with me now, yeah)
Doing all my homework , yeah

Said, said, said, sing

(Work and work)
Well those homework never stop coming
(Work and work)
Keep those test and examinations coming
(Work and work)
My fingers to the pen
(Work and work)
Keep on and can't wait till it's time to go home

Hey, have you done your homework today
Study and you don't have to pay
Hey, have you done your revision today
Study now!! right away

(Work and work)
9 to 5 I got to keep that revision going
(Work and work)
No matter how big the exam is, the muggers keep studying
(Work and work)
Doing homework ain't no use to be a superstar man
(Work and work)That's why I work, and work

Doing all my homework (ohhh, yeah)
All the homework, yeah (come on work, baby work it, say now)
All the homework (ahh)
Doing all the homework , yeah

So come on, come on, come on, come on, come on

Ooh, do do do do do do, na na na ah, ooh
(Now keep on studying)
Ooh, do do do do do do (woo, so), na na na ah, ooh
(You may not ever get A’s , but hey)

Hey, get your Maths done today (hey)
Hey, get your Chem done today
Hey, get your Bio done today (get straight A’s)

Old Frenz... 

Happy Teachers' Day.... 

Sammi vs Sammi concert... not very clear cos zoom too much.. 

Some more pics from Sammi vs Sammi concert... 

-Sammi Vs Sammi-

Sammi !! Sammi !! Arghghgh!!! she's sooooo beautiful..
the concert was ok... quite up to standard..
but not tt perfect... shld have sang more songs...
the clothes are pretty and she's really got the stage prescence..
very good performer... so excited cos finally got to see her..
and i was quite close up also... quite near...
she changed a few sets of clothes...
together with her hairstyle as well...
it's amazing how she could change so fast...
liked the parts where she sings those fast disco tracks..
together with the high quality sound effects..
make me feel soooooo damn high...
there was a short segment of a play in the concert..
but dun really look like a skit... too fast lah...
how i wish she wld juz continue singing the whole nite thru..
but her singing was ok only... a little off her and there...
it's more of wanting to watch her than of wanting to hear her..
yah... many ppl are much better singers...
but not much have tt much ability to please the crowd..
nor have the looks and dance moves tt attract ppl to wan to watch...
but she hai me also... cannot study der physics..
shit... failed the test.. hahaz..
but heck lah... she comes only once every few yrs..
hahaz...

Wow... the first top 30 of singapore idol..
the three ppl i like most got in!!!
wow...
my favourites: 1.Jeassea K Thyidor (she's da best in this group)
2.David Yeo (the same song tt beat me this yr... but by a guy.. impressed)
3.Olinda Cho (deep and rich voice... good enough to get thru.. funny)
waiting fer the next 10... hopefully got better singers...
hahaz...so excited... going to watch Sammi vs Sammi tmr...
can't wait manz... =)

this post is specially dedicated to kit...

没有陈洁仪，就不会有今天的我。。

是她的歌给了我无限的感动。。

一首“炫耀”让我接触到了流行音乐。。

也从此吸引了我进入音乐的世界里。。

她是我第一个欣赏的歌手。。

也是我学习的对象。。

她选择了忠于自己，作自己喜欢的音乐。。

不会为了名利而讨好人。。

她不是偶像，是一名艺术家。。

就算她决定不在唱歌了。。

在我心目中，她还是新加坡最好的歌手。。

虽然她最近的歌都不这么受欢迎。。

但是还是希望她能再战歌坛。。

再次以歌声感动我。。

“东湾土星”

不用为我　心痛什么

留恋过去　又能怎么

放下旧情人　的我　又活了

这就叫舍得

不用为我　担心什么

从不觉得　我像被放逐的灵魂

唱歌还能胜任　我会唱的

Woww!!! damn excited today...
so MANY good news....
1. Christina's new song "Car Wash" leaked out today..
2. Got a invitation to go fer Colours Award... ended up having free dinner and a award..
cool manz... a medal.. plus certificate... and got to meet the hockey peeps..
3. Kit Chan's long-awaited album released today...

Quite a nice song i must say fer "Car Wash", light and very missy...
and christina's vocals is AMAZING... it's like vocal gymnastics...
all the way from high to low... to even higher... she's da best!!!!!
and dun bother comparing her to britney... now they are at different leagues liao..
hahaz... xtina got into top 5 in viewers choice... britney is nowhere to be seen..

and the Colours Award.. damn shiok..
first time got to meet the team after our competition..
it's very weird one lah.. our team is like the familiar but not close one..
everyone is damn nice to one another... hahaz...
this is the first time the hall looks nice to me...
i almost forgot i'm in NJC.... hahaz...
have some speeches by GOH and principal..
den prize presentation to all the people..
the whole hall full of the best sports ppl in our school...
wow... so honoured... den there was dinner..
and the whole thing ended with dance..
the hockey peeps are like the most enthusiatic ones lor..
sepecially the gals.. keeping asking us to go into the dance floor...
real great to see my teammates again... remember about my first 4 mths in sch..
though i may not have help the hockey team much in their win..
i gave my best too.. going to every training and spending the time...
more inspired after attending.. muz train real well..
cos next yr most probably must be on the field playing liao..
really wanna be back at the Colours Award 2005...
hahaz... train hard.. after the promos... =)

Kit's album is finally out.. though it's her last album..
quite sad lah... she's the first singer i supported after listening to pop music..
but now... haizz... but she's really still the best vocalist...
as can be seen at her NDP performance... not everybody have tt voice..
gd luck to her too... hopefully i can go and buy the album soon...
ciao...

http://www.mtv.com/onair/vma/2004/viewers_choice/

Vote fer Xtina!!! She muz win!! hahaz...
though not her best video... but still very special...

sianz lah... sick now... physically so tired..
but mentally so awake... very weird...
hard to concentrate also...
got so much to do... and the piano exams coming out..
weiming finished his exam liao.. so gd..
heard tt he did quite ok... gd job manz..
if only i could say the same fer me...
ai yo.. like everytime also say so sad things on blog..
hmmm... muz change.. ppl read this type of things also sianz.
hahaz...somethings are better kept to myself...
no point of spreading sorrows to everyone..

The Voice Within by Christina Aguilera

Young girl don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl it's alright
Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly

When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend just
Trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
You'll learn to begin to
Trust the voice within

Young girl don't hide
You'll never change if you just run away
Young girl just hold tight
Soon you're gonna see your brighter day

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you're lost outside, look inside to your soul

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend just
Trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you'll learn to begin to
Trust the voice within

Life is a journey
It can take you anywhere you choose to go
As long as you're learning
You'll find all you'll ever need to know
(Be strong)
Break it
(Hold on)
You'll make it
(Be strong)
Just don't forsake it because
(No one can tell you what you can't do)
No one can stop you
You know that I'm talking to you

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
And like your oldest friend just
Trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
You'll learn to begin to
Trust the voice within, oh yeah
Young girl don't cry

I'll be right here when your world starts to fall

Happy Birthday Singapore... hahaz... 

simply beautiful.... 

Some pictures i took at the Fireworks Festival... 

因为你是我生命美丽的插曲，寂寞变成了主题
在人来人往的时间海洋里，我常想你。。。
是否我也是你生命的插曲，只可惜在你机遇里
回忆总太拥挤，而我的爱情，好像那朵云。。。

Finally watched an episode of singapore idol...
really wasn't bad...
as good as AI if not better.. hahaz..
really cannot wait fer them to finallt take the stage..
guess it wld be much better then..
no favourites yet though... they seldom play those tt sang well..
hahaz...
slacking day... skipped physics prac to teach taiwanese students play hockey..
quite fun leh.. first day of sch can slack until like tt..
only got 1 maths tutorial and PW oral presentation workshop..
so maulu there... always like tt one..
look weird on screen... like a clown like tt..
hopefully tt's not what i look like to others also..
cos i dun usually get to see myself... hahaz..

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY....... This is my HOME...

IMCB.... can u find me??!!

Damn lonely these days... sianz...
i'm a freaking loner.... even andy also can't stand me..
yah.. i'm weird lah..
everyone likes soccer, plays playstation...etc.
i dun like soccer and dunno how to playstation..
and i'm a total computer games idoit...
actually tot of many things as i was alone this week..
especially the days going IMCB...
i was like a born-loner... in a place i probably dun belong...
sometimes juz wonder if i juz leave everything behind me..
wad will happen???!! wad if one day i juz migrate to other country..
and leave all these frenz behind...
probably everything will be the same to them (especially samuel)..
and i probably can make it too... after some time also...
hmmm..... maybe i juz miss IMCB too much lah...
everytime i juz tot of myself never be going back there...
sadness juz falls over..
I managed to survive 3 days without any frenz there...
quite a feat... basically i also dunno how to face my frenz after i post this post..
i'm not complaining lor... and i dun need their extra concern...
it's juz not in them... and it's probably my fault too..
too weird.. too crazy.. too unimportant.. =p
and once i feel left out.. i'll go into the loner mode...
dao everyone else... shut them all behind a wall...
ai ya... anw all those things i say above does not apply to many of u guys lah..
those very sensitive ppl like yy, daniel and mel are definitely out..
rather the whole world be full of these ppl... hahaz..
anw.. Happy National Day... and have a bitchy, slutty day.. =p

Jay Chow's New Album...
A+... very nice... hahaz..
wow.. quite long since i blogged..
too busy liao... went to IMCB fer outreach program this week..
no school leh... but everyday must stay till 6...
very fun there..it is located at Biopolis..
was very facinated when i first reached the place..
there are 7 buildings.. all with bio related names..
Proteos, Centros, Chromos, Genome, Helios, Matrix and Nanos..
worked in real labs... very cool..hahaz..
with lab coats and stuffs.. the place is very new...
it is indeed an eye-opener.....
missed the place so much today...
it's like i suddenly feel i'm no longer a student of NJC (and i dun miss NJC)
and itstead am a person working at the lab...
maybe being a researcher is not tt bad...
but still that's not really the real me...
cannot imagine myself working in a small lab fer the rest of my life..
though i wld really like to try tt fer some time...
but tt's a place fer samuel yeo lah... hahaz..
i'd rather travel around performing...
it made me more sure of what i really love doing...
if i could choose either..
1. winning a oscar for acting
2. winning a nobel prize fer finding a cure fer some deadly disease
3. winning a olympic medal fer a sport event
4. winning a grammy award fer singing

well i wld definitely choose 4... hahaz...
tt's juz me.... =p

the singapore hits award 2004 is juz around the corner..
so i'll juz give the joeyz hits award 2004 first..
there may be more den 1 winner in each category..
depending to those tt deserve to win..

Best Album Production: Jay Chow (ye hui mei)

Best Local Lyrics: Deep (Xiao Han)

Best Local Music Composition: Sense of Belonging (Tanya Chua)

Best Local Music Arrangement: Deep (Tanya Chua, Huang Yun Ren)
Meeting (Terence Teo)

Best Group: S.H.E (Superstar/Magical Journey)
F.I.R (F.I.R)

Best Local Artiste: Tanya Chua (Stranger)

Best New Artiste: A-Sun (A Little Hurt)
Ocean Ou (Lonely Northern Hemisphere)
YiDa (Indefinable)
F.I.R (F.I.R)

Best Male Vocalist: Wang Lee Hom (Unbelievable)

Best Female Vocalist: Fish Leong (The Power of Love Songs)

Best Performing Regional Male Artiste: Jay Chou (ye hui mei)

Best Performing Regional Female Artiste: Faye Wong (To Love)

My Favourite MV: Energy (tui mo lu)
S.H.E (Persian Cat)

Most Popular Group: Energy
S.H.E

Most Popular Female: Jolin Tsai

Most Popular Male: Jay Chow

this is only what i wish will win..
not predictions hor.... next time den i predict the winners...
and xtina is up fer 2 VMAs.... hope she winss!!!

2nd single off Avril's album rox...
nice song... highly recommended

My Happy Ending by Avril Lavign

So much for my happy ending
Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread
You were all the things
I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

You've got your dumb friends
I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do
You were all the things
I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

*PURPLE*
You are mysterious, never selfish
and get interested in things easily.
Your day can be sad or happy
depending on your mood.
You are popular between friends
but you can act stupid at times,
and forget things easily.
You go for a person that's trustworthy.

quite accurate rite...
hahaz.. many people dun understand me(mysterious)
and they say i have mood swing(sad or happy depending on mood)
i act crazy at times(act stupid at times)
and i always need ppl to remind me(forgets things easily)
and i always look fer friends tt are trustworthy(go fer person tt's trustworthy)
..

cannot find a suitable to describe my feelings today..
so too bad lah.. no pics...
wow.. started from yesturday after tuition..
went to lido again fer movie i, robot..
quite nice movie juz tt a bit boring..
den later found out my parents book a hotel room again..
hahaz.. so we went to somerset to eat the carpark stalls..
damn nice food there and den return to the hotel..
lived above tangs... directly opposite lido..
not really a gd view from there..
anw, today morning got ebroadcast thingy so woke up early...
then decided to enjoy the early morning at orchard..
sat at the roadside macs and bought breakfast..
eating alone watching the cars drive-by..
it was as if the whole world is passing to fast beside me..
and i'm taking my time enjoying myself...
it felt great even when i'm alone..
beautiful and perfect day... hahaz...
den i juz take my time and eat...
ending up being late fer like half and hour...
but tt's a real gd break... hmmm...
if only everyday also can like tt...
so relaxed and quiet and peaceful....
i think i'm much recovered.... no more mad guy liao...
muz enjoy every moment tt is given to me...

Btw... kelly clarkson's new song is so damn nice...
it's abt how i feel rite now also...
it's called Breakaway... will be in the Princess Diaries 2 OST..
here is the lyrics... nice..

Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson

Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I just stared out my window
Dreaming of a could-be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray (I would pray)

Trying not to reach out
But when I'd try to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I pray (I would pray)
I could breakaway

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I loved
I'll take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jet plane, far away (I will)
And breakaway

Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging around wild indoors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me but
Gotta keep moving on, moving on
Fly away, breakawayI'll spread my wings
And I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
I gotta take a risk
Take chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway..