Wednesday, February 12, 2014
可不可以不甘心
你是天地 你是风雨 你是晴
你是温柔的叛逆
逆转我的一年四季
一寸光阴 一寸心 一朵昙花 一朵云
一朵雪花 一朵梦境 一一捧在手掌心
一颗尘埃 一菩提 一颗流星 一个你
一心一意捧在手掌心
偏偏我越抱越紧 偏偏我越爱越贪心
偏偏要爱到万箭穿了心 才死心
左手掌握着空心 右手掌握着痴心
十指紧扣一本心经 刻骨铭心着苦心
可不可以不甘心
可不可以不认命
如果可以, 拿我换给你
你是温柔的叛逆
逆转我的一年四季
一寸光阴 一寸心 一朵昙花 一朵云
一朵雪花 一朵梦境 一一捧在手掌心
一颗尘埃 一菩提 一颗流星 一个你
一心一意捧在手掌心
偏偏我越抱越紧 偏偏我越爱越贪心
偏偏要爱到万箭穿了心 才死心
左手掌握着空心 右手掌握着痴心
十指紧扣一本心经 刻骨铭心着苦心
可不可以不甘心
可不可以不认命
如果可以, 拿我换给你
so, if I wished, I could follow you 1:24 AM
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
I dreamt of you, again.
Is this a form of revenge?
But I cannot lie, when my spirits are low my heart and thoughts go out to you.
Cold cold heart.
Because I am the only one for you.
And in the end you will realise, after all the other lovers you torment me with, I have always been the one.
But for now, let me shut you out. For I fear my desires will grow.
Then maybe in a year or two, when I'm down yet again,
I beseech thee; sleep with me, and enter my dreams.
Every now & then I fall apart
I dreamt of you, again.
Is this a form of revenge?
But I cannot lie, when my spirits are low my heart and thoughts go out to you.
Cold cold heart.
Because I am the only one for you.
And in the end you will realise, after all the other lovers you torment me with, I have always been the one.
But for now, let me shut you out. For I fear my desires will grow.
Then maybe in a year or two, when I'm down yet again,
I beseech thee; sleep with me, and enter my dreams.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 3:10 AM
Friday, October 25, 2013
I dreamt of you, again.
After all these years of absence, again.
After all these years of absence, again.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 1:51 AM
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Yes, I have my desires.
So much of them.
Then, am I stupid for forsaking the one whom can bring to me, all the inclinations of my heart.
Or am I courageous, for taking this long and misty road, that may collapse upon my treads.
So, so fucking stupid.
So much of them.
Then, am I stupid for forsaking the one whom can bring to me, all the inclinations of my heart.
Or am I courageous, for taking this long and misty road, that may collapse upon my treads.
So, so fucking stupid.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 12:56 AM
Monday, September 24, 2012
I guess the point where some people can clearly distinguish themselves as matured/practical is; when they break down and cry. But it'll be a fleeting out burst of emotions. Because subconsciously, or rather, consciously, they'll tell themselves life will still go on. And I guess, they pick up from there. Yes this cycle will repeat. But nothing's wrong with crying once in a while.
I find.
I find.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 1:06 PM
Monday, June 18, 2012
If you refuse to come, I will go to you.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 11:32 PM
Thursday, May 24, 2012
I guess it's during times like this, I miss you most.
Despite how I so cruelly forsaken you, at nights like these, I miss your company.
But now should I remember you, I flee. Even in my thoughts, I avoid. No, you cannot surface again.
I miss you, but you cannot surface.
I miss how you lock my heart secure, but you cannot surface.
So how can I bring myself to flip through your words and pictures yet again.
I'M OVER (: my sincere apologies
Why do all my love affairs seem so one-sided.
I must be cursed.
Despite how I so cruelly forsaken you, at nights like these, I miss your company.
But now should I remember you, I flee. Even in my thoughts, I avoid. No, you cannot surface again.
I miss you, but you cannot surface.
I miss how you lock my heart secure, but you cannot surface.
So how can I bring myself to flip through your words and pictures yet again.
I'M OVER (: my sincere apologies
Why do all my love affairs seem so one-sided.
I must be cursed.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 12:35 AM
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
O my soul, so downcast. Do not forgive me. I was in the wrong to have deprived you of your defenses. Because if you do, I might repeat.
But you've got to lighten up. This is getting to long and depressive.
But you've got to lighten up. This is getting to long and depressive.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 11:22 PM
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Can I lament?
I pray to be a deeper person, but in my shallowness, I shall say; Life is so weary. Or so as not to insult the wealth of this earth, should I say, my limited mind is so weary. I don't usually say these things for I never believed so, but, I am indeed weary.
'In sooth, I know not why I am so sad.
It wearies me, you say it wearies you.
But how I caught it, found it, or came by it,
what stuff it is made of, where of it is born,
I am to learn.
And such a wantwit sadness makes of me,
that I have much ado to know myself.'
What an apt description of now
I pray to be a deeper person, but in my shallowness, I shall say; Life is so weary. Or so as not to insult the wealth of this earth, should I say, my limited mind is so weary. I don't usually say these things for I never believed so, but, I am indeed weary.
'In sooth, I know not why I am so sad.
It wearies me, you say it wearies you.
But how I caught it, found it, or came by it,
what stuff it is made of, where of it is born,
I am to learn.
And such a wantwit sadness makes of me,
that I have much ado to know myself.'
What an apt description of now
so, if I wished, I could follow you 11:12 PM
Sunday, May 13, 2012
If only you knew my heart, and it's brokenness at some points.
If only you knew.
Then I'll probably hide less in the dark just so to fix the pieces.
But who am I to blame but myself.
If only you knew.
Then I'll probably hide less in the dark just so to fix the pieces.
But who am I to blame but myself.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 11:41 PM
Friday, May 4, 2012
We're drifting apart, and I'm wasting my life in pursuit.
Your certainty in my life is dwindling, I must say
What I need most now is security. In the midst of all these anxiety, yes, I need security. Because I am a physical being, and I need air, not fantasy, to live.
I need a fortress. I need something strong enough built around me. At least for now.
But if you can't gather your bricks, if you can't at all, then I beseech you, just go away. Pack up and leave. Take all your luggage and just leave. And in your departure, leave nothing behind. No socks, no hair, nothing. Nothing from you.
Leave so I can build my own walls and defenses. Leave so you don't stand in my way. Leave so I don't have to waste my days repairing myself from the brokenness you bring. Leave so I may have more time to heal from your absence.
Your certainty in my life is dwindling, I must say
What I need most now is security. In the midst of all these anxiety, yes, I need security. Because I am a physical being, and I need air, not fantasy, to live.
I need a fortress. I need something strong enough built around me. At least for now.
But if you can't gather your bricks, if you can't at all, then I beseech you, just go away. Pack up and leave. Take all your luggage and just leave. And in your departure, leave nothing behind. No socks, no hair, nothing. Nothing from you.
Leave so I can build my own walls and defenses. Leave so you don't stand in my way. Leave so I don't have to waste my days repairing myself from the brokenness you bring. Leave so I may have more time to heal from your absence.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 1:06 AM
Friday, April 13, 2012
If everyone surrounding me were grains of sand on the beach, then you're a seashell.
Something I don't often get. And occasionally when I do, you might not be in a whole. Beautiful, still beautiful, but not in a whole.
Or you're like the tide. I'll just wait, and yearn. For your arrival.
Because I am stagnant, still, like the shore. Because my heart is already yours, lost in your currents.
If only, you buried your heart in my sands. Then I'll hide it deep, deep beneath.
But no, you keep it with your waves.
Waters change. I'm so afraid.
Something I don't often get. And occasionally when I do, you might not be in a whole. Beautiful, still beautiful, but not in a whole.
Or you're like the tide. I'll just wait, and yearn. For your arrival.
Because I am stagnant, still, like the shore. Because my heart is already yours, lost in your currents.
If only, you buried your heart in my sands. Then I'll hide it deep, deep beneath.
But no, you keep it with your waves.
Waters change. I'm so afraid.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 1:17 AM
Friday, March 23, 2012
You're like the copper I once thought was gold. And I just gave my heart so freely as though it was mine to give. Now that I'm indeed one in a million, what should I do? Now that I placed my life and as side bet what should I do?
I really need to go overseas for a long time. Somewhere I can be alone with nature, God's creation. Then maybe I'll realize that in fact I do have a soul and that I should treasure it. And my poor porcelain heart, ought to be treasured too.
I've been making wrong decisions so often and I've been living in my consequences since.
My God, I need to live.
so, if I wished, I could follow you 2:27 AM
Thursday, March 22, 2012
If only I could say, 'For now, that your heart is free, let me keep it. Leave it in my care, I beseech you. At least, only for now, before you abscond. For I know not of your evanescent tendencies. Then should it decide to leave, to rest in another's embrace, go. Go. For I am broken and have neither strength nor courage to defend my desire for you. But my heart, wholly yours. And the pieces of it, clung onto your clothes; will fall one by one, upon the path you should walk. Then me, my soul, though in death, will follow the trail and dwell in your presence and scent for as long as you exist.'
So have I missed my chance
So have I missed my chance
so, if I wished, I could follow you 11:34 PM