Nuts!

Well, if life wasn't nuts before it certainly is now!

Everything is upside down and I hit the ground running most days lately.

As soon as I stop the running for a moment I will update with more details.

As ever, it's not simple. No sh*t Sherlock!

Ann Summers, a handsome stranger and the demise of cool!

I am, as anyone who knows me personally will testify, not easily embarrassed, I'm pretty up-front and very little offends or fazes me....yesterday however I got my comeuppance and my very own 'Carry On' moment!

This is one of those occasional posts that I have to make an effort to word very carefully, something else that doesn't come naturally but here goes....

So 'N' and I were indulging in a little retail therapy yesterday afternoon and whilst he went off to purchase something mundane I decided to patronise the local purveyor of a well known store of let's say 'intimate' goods, Anne Summers, for educational purposes only of course.

I was happily perusing one particular shelf when a rather handsome man appeared next to me, I had a vague feeling I knew him but dismissed it and carried on about my business. A minute or two later he turned to me and said 'I think we know each other'......

It was at this point I was suddenly painfully aware that I had in my hand an item offered for sale which was vibrating wildly and which I appeared not to be able to turn off....dammit.

A short conversation ensued about where we might know one another from and all the time I was still starkly aware that I was having this conversation with a handsome stranger with the aforementioned item still in my hand and still failing to turn off! I tried to put it down on the shelf but it just bounced merrily and loudly and I had to retrieve it again and ask a sales assistant to turn it off for me!

Jeez....my usually cool, unembarrassed exterior was fast disappearing but trying to keep it together I stupidly picked up another item of similar 'genre' pretending to be completely at ease in the company of this stranger and telling myself we were both adults and there was nothing to be uncomfortable about. Who was I trying to kid?!

It was at this point, when in my state of fluster, my unknown companion declared he remembered where we knew one another from and that we both regularly frequent my local branch of Caffe Nero, that the whole situation deteriorated spectacularly.

In my surprise I very un-cooly dropped the item I was holding onto the hard slick floor with a very audible thud causing other customers to turn and look.....on impact it turned itself on, 'danced' manically across the floor for what seemed like forever and then fell apart.

The demise of my cool was complete and utter as I watched the offending item bounce around the floor while I scrabbled after it trying to retrieve it and make my apologies to the staff for the damage.

My handsome cohort was trying his best, but not succeeding, to politely not laugh too obviously while I tried desperately to ignore the very definite feeling of embarrassed perspiration trickling down my back and to gather my wits and scuttle out of the place with a tiny degree of dignity intact.

I suspect I failed dismally!

.....and the thought that I will likely run into this guy again in Caffe Nero is not lost on me. my fall from cool grace will be complete!