Things I know about Lily:

She hates when I suck things out of her nose with that little rubber water-tower shaped thingy. She doesn't understand that her nostrils are too small for me to get my nail in there and dig the booger out.

She likes lights with the exception of the flash on the camera. As soon as she sees the camera light she starts giving me mean looks, which I guess I deserve. I tell her that I'm trying to stand farther away and I'll just crop the picture, but this does not appease her.

She likes DiscoveryHD. I think it's the bright colors that she's attracted to. She doesn't really look at the tv any other time, but she likes that channel. Or maybe she just likes watching dung beetles eat monkey poop. I can't know for sure.

I was worried about a big head and a big gut, but proportionately the biggest part of her body is her feet. I have little feet with stubby toes so her big feet and long toes must come from her dad's size 12 feet. His toes are as long as my fingers and I swear he could hang upside down from trees with those things. His sister's are the same way. Lily and I may be able to share shoes when she goes to kindergarten.

She prefers the right boob over the left boob. I have no explanation for this. But while I'm on the subject of boobs again, I can't help but wonder why God made women with two boobs and babies with only one mouth. It's one of the first questions I'm going to ask Him if I get into heaven. When the milk comes out it comes out of both so while she eats one side I have to deal with the other side.

That's all for now.

Keep Brandy and Pat (one of my brother's best friends) and their baby in your prayers. He was born yesterday, a few weeks early, with a serious heart condition. He's having heart surgery this afternoon. This breaks my heart. Pray for this little one and his parents.

Here's a story:

At night I can't see very well because I don't have my contacts in and my glasses are broken. I'm blind. And since I'm breastfeeding I spend a good bit of the night topless. The other night at about 3 in the morning, blind and topless, I decided to change Lily's diaper before I fed her. She was screaming her pretty little head off. When I got the diaper off she peed and it got on her pajamas and the blanket I was changing her on. I put a diaper on her, wiped her down, changed her pajamas and she threw up. I changed her pajamas again and I heard her poop. I changed her diaper again and when I was buttoning her pajamas back up she felt all wet again! That's when I realized I was drowning my baby in breast milk. Nobody told me that when my milk came in it was just going to start coming out of my boobs whenever it felt like it! The baby and I are blind and leaky.

Now that I know that my udders don't have an on/off switch I'm very careful and keep my top on and well padded. Lesson learned.

Do the hormones ever get back to normal or will I be hopelessly sappy for the rest of my life? Jess's poem made me cry and Steve's friend Cornshake's post made me cry too. Sigh. All this crying is seriously going to ruin my reputation as a sarcastic bitch.

I love her so much.

I have so much to tell you and so little energy to do it.

First, Merry Christmas. I hope everyone has a blessed holiday and you get to spend it with people you love.

Thanks for all the prayers and kind words for our Lily. We spend hours staring at her and talking to her and laughing at how easily she melts us. In the last five days I've told her a billion things that I want her to know about life, love, family, friends, etc. and most of it has been while she's sleeping. I'm sure it won't be the last time I talk to her while she's not really listening.

The C-section wasn't bad but I was so scared. Like shaking scared, even before they gave me any meds. And I couldn't stop crying. No reason, just lots of shaking and tears before anything even happened. Blaming it on the hormones.

Then they pulled her out and I heard her cry and all was right in the world. Actually, I have no idea what was going on in the rest of the world. I was so lost in the baby. What a feeling. I already knew her but seeing her little face for the first time was an incredible experience. The rest of that day was a blur. I just know I couldn't take my eyes off her.

I liked being in the hospital because there were so many professionals checking on the baby. It helped me relax knowing they were always checking her. Plus I knew that I should enjoy those few days of laying in bed being catered to while I held the baby and felt content on the pain meds. They tried to send me home Friday morning. In so many words I told them I booked that room for four days and wasn't leaving.

It's a good thing I stayed. Breastfeeding is not easy and I can totally see why so many people don't do it. It's difficult to make everything work right and it hurts like hell. While I was worrying about it the doctor tells me the baby lost a whole pound since she was born and we needed to stay most of the day Saturday to get her weight back up. I felt horrible about having to supplement with formula. I wasn't making enough milk yet. Then a lactation consultant (a nice one, not the bitch I had to deal with earlier in the week) came in and worked with me. Emotional meltdown #2 was averted, Lily gained weight, and we got to come home.

Yesterday we spent the day with Kirk's side of the family. Liss added more pictures to her flicker account from yesterday. We'll be with my family today.

Kirk has been awesome and I am so thankful. I know he's an awesome husband but you should see him as a dad.

I have some funny stories from the past few days but I'll have to share them later. Most of them involve nipples and/or body fluids.

Love ya.

Lily Kathleen

Melissa here.

Jamie and Lily are both doing well. Lily, weighing in at 8lbs, 11oz, is 19 3/4in long and has lots of beautiful, dark, curly hair and was born at 2:10 today. Please check our Flickr account. I'll be posting pictures each day. (This picture is of Lily in Great-Grandma Ruth's arms. How precious!)

From what I can tell thus far, she enjoys napping, crying softly, and kicking her arms and legs. If I have any say about it, she'll grow to love shopping, clothes, and spending time with family and friends.

Way to make a gorgeous baby, Kirk & Jame! Love you!

so excited

so scared

thanks for the prayers and well wishes

For Corynne:

Miss Lily is estimated at over 9 pounds. The doctor said it would be safer to schedule a c-section, so I'm going in Wednesday the 19th at 2:00pm. I really would have rather pushed her out, but whatever is best for her is ok with me.

According to the ultrasound her head is in the 99th percentile. This means that out of 100 babies, my baby has a head bigger than 98 of them. Her abdomen was the 97th percentile. Kirk can't decide whether he likes Moosehead or Baby Buddha better for a nickname. Poor Lily. I hope she grows into her head quickly.

On my way to the doctor this morning the power steering went out in my car. Yep. IT took my whole big fat self to push and pull the wheel to get around the corners. I knew I wouldn't make it all the way to the doctor's office like that and I also knew that if I called someone to come get me I'd be late and have to reschedule. So I made the decision to drive a few miles and make four turns without power steering to steal my grandparents' car. I was only a few minutes late for my appointment. Kirk had my car towed to the dealership and I don't know when it will be fixed. I also drove to my appointment with the windows down. I was afraid I was going to break their automatic temperature control thing if I messed with it and they had it set a bit warmer than this pregnant girl could handle. So after you picture fat pregnant me driving without power steering, picture fat pregnant me driving the Buick with the windows down in 30 degree weather. Hope that makes your day.

The appointment went fine. The nurse said my blood pressure was perfect, which surprised me after the whole car situation. The baby stress test was fine. I guess she wasn't too concerned about the car either. She was sleeping so they woke her up with the loud vibrating buzzer. That seemed to really tick her off. Her feet let me know what she thought of the buzzer. I have another one of those tests Friday afternoon. I'm having an ultrasound too to see how big she is.

We got some Christmas shopping done Saturday. Kirk can pick up the few things we have left on his way home from work this week. This makes me feel better.

I opened a new container of test strips for my sugar meter yesterday (I test my sugar 4 times a day) and they were the wrong ones. I can't check my sugar until Monday afternoon because the pharmacy is closed all weekend. It's not a huge deal because it's been pretty easy for me to keep my sugar where it's supposed to be. I just think the pharmacy should be more careful. At least it's not the wrong medication and at least I haven't had major problems with the sugar. Still, errors in filling a prescription are not funny.

Watching the Cavs lose without LeBron sucks. I keep watching, but it's painful.

My IEPs are written. Hopefully I'll finish up the meetings this week. That should cover all of the kids who are due between now and March. After this week Lily can come any time. I'm going to try to talk her into labor after school on the 18th and hope she comes sometime early the 19th. I hope she listens.

I think Kirk is nesting. Last I looked he was in the kitchen cleaning out the refrigerator. He had everything out, including drawers and shelves, and was cleaning them. Good boy.

Snow day. :)

I didn't sleep in though. I had a doctor's appointment this morning. Since the roads were bad and the doctor's office is kinda far, Kirk stayed home to take me to and from my appointment. We spent the rest of the snow day washing baby things that go in the kitchen and putting things away in Lily's room. Plus I took a nap. Ok, two naps. I needed this day.

After my exam the doctor said everything was still all closed up. Apparently Lily likes it in there. Because of the diabetes I have to start going every Monday and Friday for a fetal non-stress test. They are going to put a belt around my belly and monitor the baby's resting heart rate and see if it increases when she moves. It can take anywhere from 20 minutes to a couple hours depending on how much she moves. I go Monday for my first one.

Well thankfully when I woke up this morning I felt less like a lunatic than I felt yesterday. The song Kirk made up on his air guitar titled, "She's Having a Meltdown" was funnier today than it was yesterday. Actually it didn't amuse me at all yesterday. He tried to help me and make me feel better but comments stated in a sarcastic tone like, "Of course I'll go to the breastfeeding class with you during the Brown's game. It's really important that we both know how to breastfeed" just weren't helping.

Anyway, today was a better day. I haven't even kicked any cats. Yet.

No.

No, I'm not done Christmas shopping.
No, not all of my IEPs are written.
No, the nursery is not ready.
No, the papers are not graded.
No, the slide show isn't finished.
No, the thankyous are not done.
No, I'm not ready for her.
No, I don't sleep well.
No, I don't feel well.
No, I'm not taking anything back.
No, I'm not mailing Christmas cards this year.
No, I'm not ready for a sub.
No, I don't believe God will give me a healthy child. (I'll just be happy if He doesn't kill her.)
No, I can't eat that. or that. or that. or that.
No, my fantasy football roster is not ready.
No, I don't care.
No, the baby shower gifts are not all put away.
No, my computer is not working.
No, I haven't washed her clothes.
No, I don't have a hospital bag packed.
No, I'm not taking off work before she is born.
No, I can not afford to take off more than 8 weeks after she is born.
No, I don't have my passport.
No, I don't have plane tickets or a hotel room for July.
No, I haven't ordered those gifts online.
No, I didn't send the sympathy cards.
No, I haven't been to the bank to cash the checks.
No, my maternity clothes don't fit anymore.
No, I didn't reschedule my nail appointment.
No, my flowerbeds are not cleaned out.
No, my cell phone doesn't work.
No, I don't have time.
No, I don't feel sane.


No. No. No.

I'm tired. My head hurts. My back hurts. I'm crampy. I'm weepy. I'm trying.

I'm at a coffee shop enjoying a decaf and killing a few minutes between my baby dr appt and a sped meeting at the county education office. The appt went fine. Only took a few minutes to look around and say "Everything looks fine, Jamie. See ya next week."

Last night we were in Cleveland watching the Cavs beat the Celtics. Fabulous.

The furniture is in. My sweet sister-in-law Renee waited at the house for the furniture guys. I plan on putting things away tonight. Might be the first time ever that I got excited about putting things away.

There is a sign in this coffee shop that says, "Unattended children will be given an espresso and a free puppy." Pretty funny.

I saw a sign the other day in an office that said, "If you look for something to complain about, you'll find it. So stop looking."

I liked that one too.

Hope you have a lovely day.

R: Mrs. Askren, when did you say you're gonna have that baby?

Me: Well, she's supposed to come the day after Christmas.

R: Wow did you get lucky! You can spend more money on yourself cause you won't have to buy her a Christmas present!

ha.

Hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving.

We've spent the weekend trying to do too much.

1. Clean up outside. The flower beds were not cleaned up for winter so I thought I'd go out and help Kirk. Bad idea. My back really hurt, and I was not much help. There are still some beds that need work but Kirk and Keith did a good job getting rid of some of the dead flowers and leaves.

2. Thank you notes. I'm over half-way through 70some thank yous. I have to take breaks because my handwriting gets so sloppy after about 12.

3. Christmas decorations. Hoping to put the tree up today before Kirk goes to the game. Most of the other decorations are up. There's still a mess in the family room.

4. Christmas shopping. Of course I didn't go out on black Friday but I'm making lists and ordering things online in hopes that everything is finished before Lily shows up.

5. Baby shopping. We bought the rest of the necessities for Miss Lily so that she has what she needs when she gets here. We also cleaned out the stuff I piled in her room from the shower. It's in Rubbermaid containers until the furniture gets here Tuesday.

6. Contemplated packing a bag for the hospital. Then I realized that everything I would put in the bag I use now. So that turned into a list for Kirk to throw together when it's time to go. Lily needs a clean outfit to come home in so I need to go through the pile and pick one out.

7. School work. I have a lot to do for this week, plus I'm trying to get things ready for being gone for a couple months. It's hard enough to get ready for a sub for one day.

Kirk went to Second Sole, a running store, to get new shoes. They didn't have what he wanted but the guy told him that he could get those shoes sent from another Second Sole. He went to pick up the other shoes today. The conversation went something like this:


Kirk: Uh...I thought I was getting the navy and gold shoes.


Shoe Guy: Yeah, this must have been all they had. It's the same shoe. It's just black and gold instead of navy and gold.


Kirk: Uh, sorry, I know this sounds crazy, but I can't wear black and gold shoes.


(Shoe Guy looks perplexed, obviously not seeing much of a difference between navy and black)



Shoe Guy: Well, I could order them if the color is important.


Kirk: Color isn't important unless it's black and gold. I'm a Browns fan and black and gold just isn't going to work for me.

Evan had surgery on his ear today. He had some kind of little hole that didn't completely close. I forget the technical name for it. He had to be knocked out for the half hour surgery but everything went well. He was running around at home by the end of the day.

Only two more days until a much needed four day weekend. It won't be an easy two days. Short weeks last longer than full weeks when kids morph into their pre-vacation animal phase. Today I watched a kid eat part of his leather necklace. I also saw another kid clothesline his best friend in the hallway. sigh.

Lily's bedroom furniture is in and they'll be delivering it next Tuesday. I think I can keep her in my belly till then.

I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow (Wednesday) morning. I wish they had a machine that would tell me when she was going to arrive. I'd like a computer print-out that says something like "Lily will be here three weeks from today in the afternoon, and she'll weigh 7 pounds. She'll be totally healthy, and your doctor won't need any of the scary equipment they showed you in your childbirth classes." I'm really not into surprises.

Busy Week

Tuesday after school I had to give a 40 minute presentation to our entry-year teachers on IEPs and differentiation. I really hate speaking in front of adults but it went fine. Kirk had the guys over Tuesday night. I sat in Lily's room and continued to sort her stuff from the shower. I also had some school work to do because I had a lot of meetings this week.

Wednesday night we went to the Cavs game. We showed up a little late because I had a union meeting and we were voting on our contract. It passed. The Cavs lost in overtime. Oh, and the escalators weren't working at the entrance we always go in so I got to climb a gazillion steps to get into the arena. I wasn't sure if I was going to die or deliver. I was sure that if Kirk said, "yeah babe, can't you feel the burn in your calves?! Doesn't that feel awesome?!" one more time I was going to push him down the steps. I've climbed those steps before but not 8 months pregnant.

Thursday we had baby school. We toured the birth center and suites at the hospital. It's very new and very nice. I hate that hospital and I feel sick every time I go near it. However, this section of the hospital is brand new and I enter through new doors and never have to go near ICU or pass any of the all-too-familiar places that haunt me. This new section seems cheery and happy and full of babies and mommas and tired daddies and smiling family members. The doors to the rooms must be sound-proof because I didn't hear anyone screaming.

Friday it was back to the Q for another Cavs game. They won last night. Lebron has been awesome. There was a kid across the aisle from us that was so awesome we wanted to take him home. He was cheering and dancing in a most hysterical manner and offered the minibasketball he caught to people around him because he "already had one at home." His dad comes to all the games and usually brings either his wife, a business partner or a friend. We never like the guy and because of some of his behaviors we refer to him as A**hole Dirtbag. Now that we know his kid is awesome we aren't referring to him as that anymore. Now he's just Guy With Awesome Kid.

Today it's Jan and Bob's for Buckeye football and then going out for Thanksgiving with Bob's parents, kids, and grandkids. It's going to be hard to stick to the diabetes diet today but I will do it for Lily.

If you are sending a Christmas wish list to Jebby feel free to add a few extra gifts to the list as he'll be getting a few fat checks in the near future. Over the last couple weeks and continuing into the next couple weeks he is working every day usually 12 or 16 hours. Sucks cause we hardly ever see him. I know the dog misses him. I expect to find a letter from Diesel soon.

Lily has sooooo much stuff thanks to all the friends and family who made the trip to Amish country for my baby shower. Jan, Renee, Patty, and Liss did a lot of work to make it such a great day for me. We had a soup and salad lunch at tables decorated with vases of lilies. Everyone got a little bar of soap with Lily of the Valley scent and "Lily Kathleen" on the wrapper. After the initial washings of Lily's new clothes Kirk doesn't think we'll have to wash them again. He thinks she has enough to adopt a "one and done" philosophy. We have many things to bathe her, entertain her, feed her, keep her dry, safe, and comfortable. She got a beautiful cherry toybox for her room that will match her furniture. Oh, and the lady bugs! Her room will be crawling with cuteness. I can't believe how many talented people hand-made gifts. Not only did they take the time to come to the shower but they took the time to actually MAKE the gift. We're so blessed.

The worst thing about the shower is I felt like I didn't have enough time to truly express my gratitude to everyone. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!

You can see all 128 pictures (three pages) taken with Liss and Jan's cameras at the shower if you click on this link. :) If you click on the picture it will enlarge it. I apologize for sitting with my legs so far apart. I didn't realize I was sitting so unlady-like. It's just more comfortable that way. The belly has to go somewhere.

I almost didn't vote yesterday. I planned on going after my nail appointment. I forgot to get my drivers license out before I had my nails done. I sat in the church parking lot, where we vote, and decided that if I could easily get my license without ruining my nails, I'd vote. If my license was difficult to get to and there was a high probability of me messing up a nail, no vote. I fished out my license like a skilled surgeon and voted.

It always amazes me how quickly troublemakers find each other. We combined 150 5th graders from three different schools and within a few days the rough ones were either fighting or joining forces. Fighting sounds bad but I assure you that joining forces is worse. They really don't need to be sharing ideas with each other. Besides, if they are fighting with each other they are leaving everyone else alone. I found three of them huddled together today whispering after recess. I'm not sure what tomorrow will bring.

After school today I heard the girlscouts singing a girlscout song that my mom taught our troop, oh, 20some years ago. It was hard for me to get out of the building without getting teary but I managed. Now if I can just get through the baby shower Saturday with nothing but smiles...

I couldn't stay awake for the Cavs game last night. That's the worst thing about those west coast games - they don't start until 10:30. I'm not in my twenties anymore, you know.

Speaking of not being in your twenties anymore, heh heh, at the time of this posting Renee only has a little more than 6 hours left of being in her twenties. We all know Renee will probably spend those last few hours in a bar somewhere doing body shots off total strangers and dancing on tables until the wee hours of the morning while my brother is home cleaning the house and taking care of the baby. I hope she knows this behavior is no longer acceptable in your thirties. She's really going to have to start acting like a mature, responsible adult now.

I'm mad at you.

Most of you blog readers have either given birth or seen someone give birth. So why didn't any of you tell me about the placenta before I had to see it on the video in childbirth class?! I was ok with everything I saw - the pushing, dilating, crowning, baby coming out, etc. BUT THEN after the baby is out and I think the video is over out comes this GIANT glob of guts that's like the same size as the baby only a lot grosser and more blob-like. I know my eyes were huge when I leaned over to Kirk and said "What the hell is that?!" to which he replied "I don't know. Do you think we have to take that home too?" The instructor must have seen my face because she went into more detail after the movie.

Seriously. One of you should have warned me about 5 pounds of extra guts coming out after the baby is born.

Kirk was well-behaved. The instructor said the word "vagina" like a hundred times and he didn't giggle like a 12 year old at all. He also said he was glad that he knows about the placenta now. He said if he would have seen that after the baby was born he would have thought I lost my stomach and my lungs and was certainly going to die as a result. Then he would have passed out.

Went to the Cavs season opener last night. Yeah. The game didn't quite go the way I had hoped. My Cavaliers looked sloppy and disorganized - a far cry from the Eastern Conference Champs I watched a few months ago. LBJ didn't even score in the first half. Sigh. Let's hope things get much better in the remaining 81 regular season games.

You can always find something good in something bad, right?

1. Free schedule magnets. Well, free if you don't count the price of the tickets ;)

2. Lots of jokes at Dirk and Mark Cuban's expense on the jumbotron. Not only were they funny jokes but when they showed Dirk and Mark watching themselves being made fun of they were good sports. Mark was laughing. Of course his team was up by 20 points so that might have had something to do with his good mood.

3. Braylon Edwards sat about 6 rows in front of us. He looked like a real person. Very little bling. Last year when he wasn't catching footballs in the endzone he would show up at games in shiny powder blue suits with fancy hats and jewlery and shoes. His best super shiny"look at me" outfits. Last night he had on jeans and a brown shirt. I hope someone told him he looks hot in plain street clothes and ridiculous in shiny blingy obnoxious clothes.

4. Kirk shook Josh Cribbs' hand. He was walking past us and Kirk yelled "Cribbs! Probowler, baby!" And Josh smiled, shook his hand and said "Definitely. Most definitely." And Kirk looked like he just touched Elvis.

Connor's 4th birthday

He got a new set of wheels.

I got in trouble for taking this picture of Grandma and Barb eating giant malted milk balls. Grandma isn't making a face. She's trying to conceal the giant piece of chocolate in her mouth. She'll be so happy to see that I blogged it.

Evan cheats at bean bags.

Recent accomplishments:

1. Two days of parent conferences. My tired aching swollen feet hated every minute of being at school for 12 hours. Conferences were good though. I really can't complain too much. It's nice to see if you are on the same page as the parents. If you are - great! If you aren't, well, at least you know. It also cracks me up when kids try to play their parents and teachers against each other. Let's make a deal, parents. If you don't believe everything your kids says about what happens at school I won't believe everything your kid says happens at home, ok?

2. Ate Lily's weight in sugar free chocolates. Not proud of this but I sure did enjoy it.

3. Had a 10 minute baby doctor appointment. Seriously, from the time I signed my name on the sign-in sheet to the time I was scheduling my next appointment was 10 minutes. Everything was fine. Or at least he didn't find anything wrong in the three minutes he checked me out. Appointments are every two weeks now. My feelings of excitement over meeting Miss Lily are starting to turn to feelings of terror over my ability to be her mom. At this point all I have for her to sleep in is an extra cat bed.

4. Failed to control my sarcasm with teachers. I typically pride myself on being calm and professional. Lately, many thoughts that I used to be able to keep tucked safely away inside my head are flying out of my mouth at warp speed. sigh.

5. Controlled my sarcasm with 5th graders. So when my girl was sliding the protractor around on her paper in an attempt to measure the 60 degree angle and looked up at me and said "It's 4 measuremeters." I said "Honey, let's line the bottom of the protractor up with one side of the angle and see how many DEGREES the angle is." I didn't say, "Yeah, 4 measuremeters is probably right. I'm so impressed that you can measure angles without ever holding the protractor still or looking at any of the numbers on it. And by the way, congratulations on inventing a new unit of measurement."

TGIF

If you are over 18 and aren't totally offended by Snoop Dog's language...

Go to gizoogle.com and type in a website address. It translates the website to jive.

For example

Here's my blog translated. I particularly like the translated email that the teacher sent me after the pizza incident.

Now gizoogle Fran's blog. It all makes sense now. ;)

Kirk ran a half marathon, his longest competitive event to date. It took place at Perennial Vineyards, a local winery, which is kind of funny. We've staggered out of that place on more than one occasion. Kirk came in 20th out of 300 and third in his age group. Usually they give top runners a medal or a trophy. Yesterday they received a stenciled piece of the slate roof from a chicken coop that has been on the owners' property since 1820. It's hung with a purple shoelace. Creative winos, huh? I like it. Here's a picture of Kirk after the race. The smile looks a little forced but I guess after running 13 miles in 1 hour 32 minutes and 50 seconds that's understandable. You can kind of see the grapes in the background.

** Kirk's picture is now on the Stomp the Grapes Website

After the race I went to a baby shower for Pat's wife, Brandy. I got hopelessly lost on the way and showed up an hour late. Evidently Wayne County doesn't use road signs so you have to guess what road you're on. I guessed wrong. Repeatedly.

Yesterday I was in charge of getting pizza for 65 staff members before parent-teacher conferences. They had to eat between 3:40 and 4:00. The pizzas that were to be delivered at 3:20 showed up at 4:00. I was so mad (65 teachers couldn't eat because they had to go to their first conference at 4:00) I told off the pizza lady on the phone, royally reamed out the delivery guy and threw one of those empty pizza warmer bags at him. Well, he asked for his bag and I rudely threw it to him over a cafeteria table. This was also after he told me they "got real busy" (I ordered my pizzas TUESDAY and it was mid-Thursday afternoon in NAVARRE) and tried to charge me $15 more than I was quoted.

My behavior was not acceptable, even for a mad pregnant woman. Here's an email I received after my apology email to our hungry staff:

Jamie,

Thank you so much for your efforts. I might have to grab some on the way out, as I'm booked solid for the rest of the evening. Please don't be too hard on yourself--you are not responsible for another person's mistakes. (Plus we don't want you to go into labor over this!)

BUT, I'm sorry I missed the show! Heard it was pretty entertaining. From what I understand, that delivery man will probably refuse to come back here anyway!


Yeah. Embarrassing.

TGIF

Thursday night we went to the Cavs preseason game. It was good to be back in the Q watching the boys. Wish Sasha and Andy were there. I'm still getting over LeBron and his dumb Yankees hat. Nonetheless I missed basketball and I'm looking forward to the season opener in a few weeks.

Friday night we went to Dad's, ate and watched the Indians lose. The food was really good, but the game wasn't.

Kirk ran in the Jack-O-Lantern jog Saturday morning at the Akron YMCA. Several people ran in costumes and a juggling jester won the contest for best costume. His costume wasn't that great but he juggled while he ran three miles - pretty impressive. Kirk didn't wear a costume but he came in 9th out of about 200 and was first in his age group. He got his first trophy :)

The rest of the day was spent grocery shopping, cleaning, napping, and watching UK beat the #1 ranked LSU. I fell asleep in the 7th inning of the tribe game and had to check ESPN when I woke up to go to the bathroom at 2:00. Go tribe!

Today Kirk is going to the Brown's game and I'm doing some baby registry adjustments and grading papers. I'm also working on differentiating literacy centers and putting together a multi-tiered social studies/reading/language arts unit.

Oh, and I have to figure out what I have to do to get a passport. Bubba gets married in Mexico in July and we plan on going. We just can't decide if we are going to go for the weekend, a week, and whether or not we are going to take a 6 month old and possibly a babysitter (ahem, Jan) with us. Or maybe we'll leave her home with a babysitter (ahem, Jan) for the weekend.


Wow. That's a lot of random rambling.

Grandma Jean had a pacemaker put in today and it went well. She should be home Wednesday.

A responsible, hardworking student was summarizing a page in our book. This page was about a father who was upset because his son was making such a ruckus and he didn't see what all the fuss was about. The student says, "Nick's dad was upset because he was making such a fuckus." He was mortified when he realized what he said. It was hard not to giggle.

I've been frequenting Navarre's coffee/gift shop in the morning for a decaf. The lady that works there is so nice. Since I'm there at about the same time every morning I see a lot of the same people. We don't know each others names but I know the lady who drives the silver truck recently started taking some cholesterol medicine, the guy that wears the blue uniform has a gifted son, and pony tail girl is learning how to cook. And they know that I'm having a girl in December. Cheers to coffee shop stranger friends.

Kirk was golfing. I needed a few things. I didn't think Walmart would be too bad on Monday night. I was wrong.

1. Walmart is located near Massillon's sewer treatment plant. The parking lot smells like crap. literally.

2. Inside Walmart smells like that fried chicken they sell in the deli section. For some reason this makes me nauseous.

3. Amidst the blinding fluorescent lights, the people standing in the middle of the aisle with their carts, and a crying toddler I grab a birthday card, a sympathy card, and a pack of colored pens (for grading).

4. I can't find the CDs I need to backup my pictures. I ask the two ladies standing behind the counter in the electronics dept. They don't know. I have to walk around until I find them. This annoys me more than it should.

5. I see someone I know. We have the conversation where she says I look cute pregnant and I tell her I don't feel cute. I smile in spite of being a giant sweaty hog who can't find the aisle with the blank discs.

6. I find and pay for all the things I came for. I leave Walmart. In my car on the way home I still smell crap and fried chicken.

7. I immediately shower the Walmart off me when I get home.

National Geographic has cool pictures. I want a baby lynx.

Kirk golfed Saturday and I did some school work. I also got my hair cut. I read something about making rash decisions about your hair when you're pregnant, and that's what I did. Our well water turns my hair trashy orange and I usually use some harsh chemicals that I get at Lowes to get the orange out. Since I've been pregnant I haven't wanted to pour that stuff on my head. So the only solution to getting rid of the orange hair seemed to be cut it off. So it's off.

Spent Sunday watching sports - football, baseball, fantasy football. I'm also wearing some new pajamas tonight. Nice big soft maternity pajamas. I think that's a sign that I'm old. I'm very excited about my new jammies and I didn't buy them at Victoria's Secret (VS doesn't sell pajamas with this much material).

My rookie from last year ran a marathon is Chicago today and I heard through the grapevine that's he's in ICU in some Chicago hospital. Please pray for him.

Liss hand-made all of the invitations for my baby shower November 10th. They're very cute. They'll be in the mail later this week. You'll oooh and ahhhh over how cute they are. I did.

I've had my cell phone two years and that means I get a new phone free or a discount on an upgrade. I upgraded to a phone with more features than I know how to use and I'm not sure if I really like it. If your phone rings once and my number shows up and I don't answer when you say hello, well I probably just accidentally called you then tried to hurry and hang up before it rang on your end. Sorry.

The cashier at the grocery store said I looked like I was going to pop any minute. I still have almost three months to go.

Kirk went to the Indians game Friday night and saw a great win. His friend called him at the last minute with an extra ticket. Go Tribe!

This means I was on my own for dinner. After minimal contemplation I decided on 2 bottles of water and a large bowl of Low Carb Breyers Rocky Road Ice Cream made with Splenda. Yep. I had a healthy breakfast and lunch. I ate a bowl of ice cream for dinner. I only get three small servings of carbs in the evening and tongiht I ate them in a bowl of nutty chocolately marshmallowy goodness.

And it was soooooo awesome.

The ladybugs stay.

Lily's still a girl.

The top picture is of her face.

The middle picture is a profile with her hand in her mouth

The bottom picture is a foot.

I had another ultrasound today so they could take pictures of her face. The tech said that the doctor wanted a picture of her nose and lips because they didn't get a good picture last time. She also said everything looked good. It was a much more pleasant experience this time because I didn't have to drink all that water before I went in.

Lily's fat. After taking the measurements she measured about three weeks bigger than is typical. It recalculates the due date even though they don't change it on my chart. That date said December 8th. They estimate her at 3 pounds 6 ounces. She also has hair.

I met with the doctor after the ultrasound and he said my sugar was good, which I already kinda knew since I've been pricking my finger 4 times a day. At least I don't have to take insulin at this point.

Meet the class:

1. The Petter. She likes to invade my personal space and pet my arm like I'm her cat. Drives me nuts and I try to tell her to stop as politely as possible because she's sweet.

2. The Vanishing Klepto. This little chicky has some talents. She has a history of stealing although we haven't had many issues this year other than "yes that is my pencil my mom bought it for me even if it has someone else's name on it." She can also make herself discreetly disappear, like if you walk the class to gym she'll duck into a bathroom or another classroom.

3. The One Who Looks Retarded But Is Smart. I know this isn't nice to say but honestly his physical appearance makes you think he should be in a special school. Plus he does things like spin binders on his head, chew pencils and periodically bang his head on the desk. But go ahead and ask him about a current event topic and see what kind of answer you get. He knows more about what's going on in the rest of the world than I do - and I watch the news and read the paper every day. If it wasn't for some of his bizarre behaviors and his looks I don't think he'd be in Special Ed.

4. Angry Angry Angry. Gotta feel sorry for him because he has it tough at home. But it's still frustrating to work with a kid who wants to constantly argue and attempt to overpower you, refuses to work and bullies everyone else. He's quite a project for me. I have a soft spot for kids with major behavior problems.

5. Who Me. Thinks I was born yesterday. Hyper and ornery and does things that make me turn my head so I don't laugh and encourage his creative displays of inappropriate behavior. Like when he took my colored multiplication charts and fanned them out behind my seat while I was working with another student, making me look like "a multiplication peacock."

I have 1o other kids but I think meeting those 5 is enough for now.

There were three relay teams from Fohl Church. Here's a picture of most of them at the starting line.

Kirk ran with a relay team in the Akron Marathon Saturday morning. We left the house at 5:15 - just a bit early for a Saturday. Over 7000 runners participated, making this the biggest event Kirk has participated in. He ran a 10K, the third of 5 runners in his relay, and his time was 40 minutes and 7 seconds. He really wanted to break 40min but it's still a great time. The whole experience was pretty cool. He runs a half marathon in a few weeks (a little over 13 miles) and I bet he spends the next year training for a marathon (26 miles!) so he can run the whole thing next fall.

Thankfully there were portapotties everywhere. They gross me out but when you are stuck on the streets of Akron with a baby using your bladder for a pillow, well, portapotties every so many feet are a welcome sight. I went for the handicapped portapotties whenever I could. They're much bigger.

Liss went with us to Akron and we went to Pancho's for lunch after the race. Then she talked me into going to Babies R Us and Target to register. I'm probably the only mother-to-be in the world that doesn't think walking around a store and scanning everything you want into a little computer is fun. It's shopping. I put a little effort into it but eventually I just let Kirk and Liss scan whatever they wanted. I'm pretty sure Liss scanned some leopard print pants and Kirk was rather amused with a container of butt paste. After walking around Akron and Babies R Us and Target I really felt like I had run a marathon. I can make adjustments to the registries from my computer so I'll look at it today between watching football, doing laundry, and grading papers. I think we scanned a few things at Target and Babies R Us and I don't want two of everything. In fact I think I registered for three swings. I do like the ladybugs and flowers theme we've decided on for Lily's room.

Random:

I think I got the sugar thing under control. I know what, when, and how much to eat to keep my sugar where it's supposed to be. After I deliver the baby I'd like someone to please bring me a tray of desserts. I'll go on the diet to lose the baby weight after the dessert tray is empty.

Kirk ran another race Sunday. 10K in 41:15. Another personal best. He runs a relay next weekend in Akron.

Lily gets the hiccups. They make me giggle.

Someone ran into Joe's truck today while it was parked. I hear it has a little damage. It's not the worst news I've heard lately (pray for Deidre and Dave and also Ronnie's family) but it sucks that he has to wait for it to get fixed.

Venus is very bright.

Sugar-free jelly isn't that bad.

A phone conversation with Evan goes something like this:
E: Hi Jim
J: Hi Ev. What are you doing?
E: Papa Jebby?
J: I saw Papa Jebby at his house. He was playing with your tractors.
E: baby cows?
J: Yep. He was playing with your baby cows too.
E: Bye

I feel huge. And sometimes when I sneeze a little pee comes out. Sorry. That's too much information. I just thought that kind of thing happened when you get old, not when you are pregnant. I'll have to look this up in one of my pregnancy books and if it isn't normal I'll frantically call the doctors and tell them I'm leaking!

Kirk's been packing my lunch. He puts a quote in it each day. I love my quote of the day.

Well I've decided to be my own nutritionist. I followed their strict diet for two days and my blood sugar was between 57 and 80 the first 10 times I checked it. Since I'm supposed to be between 90 and 120 when I check it two hours after a meal I've decided I need to increase the portion sizes a little. Their portion sizes were laughable. I'll stay away from sweets but I think my body needs more than 3/4 cup of cooked pasta for dinner. Lily's hungry.



A few things I wanted to say to the nutritionist but didn't:



Yeah, I know what my diabetic grandma eats. But she's tiny and turns 85 on Friday. I'm big and pregnant. Grandma can eat little meals. I eat meals that are as big as my grandma.



Ohhhhhh! a snack of 5 wheat thins between meals sounds delicious! No, wait, I mean eating only 5 wheat thins will do little more than piss me off.



I have a masters degree. You don't have to read the glucometer instruction manual to me.



I've been reading info on the American Diabetes Association website and the Mayo Clinic website. Thanks for giving me this book for retarded mothers with the absolutely absurd pictures in it. I think I could have figured out what "overweight at birth" means without your illustration.

Evidently I failed my sugar test. The doctor's office called today and told me to stop at the pharmacy and pick up my glucometer and other diabetes paraphernalia (a whole bag of stuff!) and come in tomorrow at 9:00am to meet with a nutritionist and 10:00 to meet with a doctor. Something tells me I'm not going to like this nutritionist. I already don't like the looks of the stuff in my pharmacy bag. I don't know exactly what lancets are but they don't look or sound pleasant. At least it's good that I'm going in tomorrow. I've suddenly become terrified of eating and terrified of not eating. Of course that's in addition to already being terrified that something bad is going to happen to my Lily. So I'll pray and you'll pray too and we'll all keep a positive attitude, okay?

I woke up this morning and it was still true.

The Browns scored 51 points for a win yesterday.

Anybody picking up Derek Anderson in their fantasy league?

Jes and Dylan have a wedding website. Snot came flying out my nose when I got to this picture of them after prom in 1998. So awesome.

Seems like everyone is sick lately and Kirk and I are no exceptions. I thought at first maybe it was allergies but it feels more like a cold. And it just figures that we've been asked to go out to eat with three different couples the past two days. I love to go out to eat but my head feels kind of gross. I don't think a box of kleenex on the table and sitting across from Kirk who's been actually stuffing kleenex up his nose would be very appetizing. Maybe next weekend.

Joe got his truck today. It took awhile to get it equipped with hand controls but he's happy to finally have it. Here's a video of him walking with crutches.

Her name is

Lily Kathleen.

Lily, like this pond flower I took a picture of the other day. Kathleen, like her guardian angel.

The testing this morning wasn't bad. I didn't feel sick other than just generally feeling a little crappy from not eating. Jan, Kirk's mom, went with me so I had someone to talk to for three hours. Then we went for the soup, salad, and breadsticks deal at Olive Garden. It's an all-you-can-eat deal and after not eating anything but a cup of super sugary fruit punch for the last 16 hours I was going to need some type of all-you-can-eat deal. They sent my blood to the lab so I won't hear anything for a few days. It only makes sense for me to eat a lot of sweets over the next couple days just in case they tell me I'm diabetic and have to lay off the oreos and milkshakes, right? just kidding.

I'm tired.

My new school is beautiful. We have a few kinks to work out but overall we've had a busy, stressful, exciting, successful start to the school year. I have 14 kids and 3 of them are quite a handful. I have a feeling they will provide me with plenty of things to write about now that Little B has moved on.

I had a blood glucose test last week and the doctor called yesterday to tell me that my sugar was high. This means I may have gestational diabetes. I have to go in tomorrow for more testing. I have to fast for 12 hours (AHHH! How can they do this to a pregnant woman??!!). Then I have to drink that sugary drink again like I did last week. They will then test my blood every hour for the next three hours. And since I haven't had anything to eat the nurse told me today that it will likely make me sick. So I'll be missing the third day of school to go sit in a doctor's office all day feeling like crap. Oh, and I have to go back for another ultrasound in a few weeks because the doctor said he couldn't see the baby's face clearly. So I'm pretty worried and trying not to let it interfere with school - other than missing day 3. I'm just praying the baby is ok.

Frog or horse?

both! If you look at it sideways too.

Check out my camo frog. Can you find him? Evan has named him Toady.

We spent part of labor day weekend in my classroom trying to move some boxes around. It still has a long way to go to be ready for kids. I still need furniture. There's also some construction boxes being stored in my room. I have to wait for those to disappear before I can unpack some of my boxes. If that building is ready for kids Monday it will be a miracle. When it's all done it will be beautiful, but I don't see that happening anytime soon. I have three inservice days Wed, Thur, and Fri. When everything starts looking awesome I'll post some pictures. Don't hold your breath.

We took Evan "swimming" in Bob and Jan's spa. He liked putting his head under water.

Kirk ran a race on Labor Day. It was a 10K in Alliance (that's Glamorgan castle in the background) and I got a picture of him crossing the finish line. He came in 13th out of 150 and was second in his age group. He was so happy that NO GIRLS beat him in this race. No strollers either.

Last day of vacation.

I wouldn't look so fat if my husband wasn't so damn skinny.

We look like a needle fish standing beside a whale.

If you recline in a chair by the pool and look up, this is the view.
The water is sooo clear in Florida. We're used to that murky Myrtle Beach ocean water. Kirk bought a mask and you could see lots of fish and shells underwater.
This is what our place looks like from the beach.

We rented chairs and umbrellas every day.
We had dinner reservations and I was talking on the phone while I was getting ready. I went to dinner with wet hair. Oh well.

It was a beautiful, relaxing, fun vacation. :)

We're staying at the Ocean Point Marriott in West Palm Beach with Kirk's mom and grandma.

The place is very pretty with several lovely pools, pretty landscaping, and a jacuzzi tub that I have used twice (with bubbles and without hot water) since we got here Thursday.

Today on the beach I finished The Kite Runner by Kahaled Hosseini and am about to start on either High Noon by Nora Roberts or The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell. I brought a variety of books this vacation, from my typical romantic thrillers, to a boy's life in Afghanistan over the past 25 years, to pop sociology.

Last night we ate at Seasons 52, a beautiful restaurant overlooking the inter coastal and serving fresh healthy tasty food. I had a Greek salad, balsamic chicken with roasted red pepper sauce, and spinach orzo. They serve desserts in shot glasses so we had one of each: Key Lime Pie, Rocky Road, Old Fashioned Carrot Cake, Tiramisu, Chef's Wild Card Mini, Strawberry Mango Cheesecake, Red Velvet Cake, Pecan Pie with Vanilla Bean Mousse, and Fresh Fruit Cocktail. One of the benefits of being pregnant is that you can eat dessert without feeling like people are looking at you with that "honey, you really don't need that" look. Or maybe they still look at me that way and I just don't care. Either way, I'm really enjoying desserts.

Kirk had his personal best time last weekend in a race. He ran 5K in 19 minutes and 22 seconds. That's fast. The Ohio Challenge Series website posts pictures of each race and Kirk happens to be in two pictures for this race. Here and here. The first one's kinda like Where's Waldo. The second one you should be able to find him pretty easily.

Last night I had a dream that I had to go to a ceremony where they were making Joe an honorary policeman. I thought it was going to be a symbolic thing but when I got there I realized they were giving him a uniform and a specially equipped patrol car. I went up to the group of real police officers and said something like, "Please don't do this! You're making a mistake! He won't protect and serve he'll just turn the bubble lights on and drive around town really fast!" And they all looked at me like I was the cruelest person in the world. I'm such a good sister. Even in my dreams I spoil Joe's fun.

Oh, and I'm blaming the dream on the fact that the last thing I read last night before I went to bed was Matt Doerschner's fiance's blog (and I thought it was funny that their dog's name is Tazer). Matt's a real policeman, but he wasn't in my dream. He would know better than to let my brother behind the wheel of a cruiser.

We leave for Florida tomorrow. I think the place we're staying has Internet so I may be able to blog. That's if I'm not too busy reading trashy novels and stuffing my face.

Uncle Kirk bought Evan some new big boy clothes for his birthday.

Again I find myself waaayyy out of touch with the Disney Channel. I met with some teachers today and they were all talking about the High School Musical 2 parties that they were either throwing for their children or their children were attending. I say dumb things like "What high school? Our high school?" and they chuckle at my out-of-touchness. They assure me I'll soon know all the cool shows, movies, and tweenage idols. When I got home my book club buddy called and in our conversation she mentions that her daughter is having a slumber party for High School Musical 2.

I guess this is a big deal to everyone but me.

Some day soon I'll be able to walk down the backpack aisle at WalMart and name all the human and cartoon faces on the bags.

I had to go shopping for a bathroom rug and a couple pairs of dress pants for work. Some things that crossed my mind as I was shopping:

1. Strangers are very nice to pregnant women. I’m not sure if this has to do with the miracle of growing a baby in your belly or if most people just know what unstable creatures we are and they are very afraid.

2. Maternity pants don’t come in tall and short sizes. I can have mine hemmed, but what do the really tall girls do?

3. If I see a good deal on bath towels I shouldn’t buy them. Even though our current towels are rags and have strings hanging from them the new towels will never pass the quality inspection if my husband.

4. Going back-to-school shopping with your kids doesn’t look like very much fun.

5. I weigh 40 pounds more than my brother. It doesn’t make me feel better than I am two people because one of us only weighs a pound.

Evan's birthday yeah

I know it's a silly short video but I like the fist pump. And it's his birthday even if he doesn't realize it.

Evan turned two today!Gwenyth had a lovely time at the party. As did the great-grandmas.
Connor tested out the roller coaster,

Evan loves parties!