Writing the Great American Third Novel

So my posts have been fewer and farther between lately, and I blame it all on my new writing schedule, which places me at a coffee shop directly after work until later at night.

I know, all of you out there are so, so, so sad at that. But it's the truth.

And, my Mac doesn't have a wireless card, so I can't just willy-nilly jump on the internet. It's a cop out, but I really have been working hard.

I'm 95 pages into the new book, and if I had to describe it, I'd have to say that it's a hit-man-tries-to-hunt-down-and-kill-a-serial-killer-for-killing-his-partner sort of novel. I don't know. We'll see how it goes. If not well, then there's always the fourth book, eh?

I go to a nice little coffee shop downtown called Hot Corner. It's nice. And big. There's the main room, for ordering coffee and whatnot. You can even check out games like chess and Connect-4 (of course!) to play while you drink your coffee or soda. They even sell these humorously big cans of Jolt! Cola. I had the audacity to drink a whole one a few weeks ago and I was bouncing off the walls afterward.

Beyond the main room, there's a middle breezeway, where all of the smokers go to hang out. This place is often crowded, as there are lots of smokers in Athens. But hey, some of them are attractive, so that's not big deal.

And, wait for it, Hot Corner also has a third room! Isn't this place great? It's an unofficial quiet room. There's no sign up, but it's pretty obvious that it is a quiet room.

For instance, last night, as I was working on my book, the only other guy in the room kept sighing really loudly, as if he was unhappy with my typing. "Uuuuughhhhh," is what it sounded like. I was in the far back corner, as far away as I could be, and I tried to keep my typing noise at a minimum. Besides, there were three or four sets of people screaming at each other at the bar next door. I don't see how I could have distracted him.

But it's a cool place, to say the least. It's like my very own version of Central Perk, only not in New York City.

The third book is going well, though, and I really do think that, so far, it's better than the first two. I hope so anyway.

Another realization I've made lately is that I don't like Matisyahu whatsoever. I don't know if you've heard of him, but Matisyahu is a Hasidic Jew faux-Jamaican white rap artist. I know. And I didn't mind him. He had a song that was very popular on 99x for a good stretch there, and I kind of liked it.

Until I heard the whole album. I did not buy the album, thank God, but I had the pleasure of hearing it twice in one day for about a four day period last week, courtesy of an employee who can't get enough of his stuff. It's ridiculous. And annoying. And just plain bad.

If you get a chance to listen to him, don't. I don't highly recommend him. Have a good day.

Working Sniff

Like the pun above? I do, too, and it illustrates my current working condition right now. I'm getting sick from the pollen count down here in Georgia. Everything has been dusted in yellow, and I've got a fever and the chills and damn the stupid weather!

This blog will be little more than a veritible parade of free-floating thoughts from my world. First of all, I wanted to see if you knew that in Califonia - most notably Silicon Valley - that gas prices exceed $4.00 a gallon? In others it's well over three. That's craziness.

I understand that the gas price is all about supply and demand and people are paying what the market will allow. But this isn't a pizza from Papa John's. It also isn't your cable package, which, sorry Americans, is expendable. Gas is more like a commodity for the people of our great country. Those of you who live in small towns know for a fact that there's no public transportation.

Athens, GA, for example has the second largest public transit system in the state (next to MARTA), which says a lot for the state of public travel in the Peach State, if you know what I mean.

I don't propose that we have a windfall tax on oil companies - excuse me, OIL COMPANIES - but I think that there's a better way that the price of gas can be fenagled.

Windfall taxes, however, are not the way to go. As much of a socialist as I may or may not be (depends on who you ask), I still don't support them. To quote Clark Howard, "That [the proposal of windfall taxes] is a perversion of capitalism."

So where do you find a balance? Ostensibly, you'd think that oil companies - damnit, OIL COMPANIES - would have had enough by now and allow a price drop. In a perfect world, that would be great. But I don't know how much power the companies even have over the price.

So, in a practical world, what we do is head up a grassroots campaign to cut out using so much oil, cutting out the demand. It won't work, but that's what we SHOULD be doing. NOT, as others have said, create a tax for making money. That's ludicrous. Paying for gas sucks, but putting the government in charge of taking that money away sucks even worse. Don't you think?

PS:

I would just like to include one little tibit: Everyone who talks about the case of the Emergency Appropriations Bill, with funds going to the troops, seems to include Republicans' assessments of the pork attached to the bill. What they don't seem to cover is the fact that the pork issues, including money for Katrina victimes, is something left over from the last Congress, which did not get done what it needed to before ending. Go figure.

And should the President veto a bill with necessary emergency funding for the troops, if he says that it is desperately needed? Shouldn't he sign it into law, or at least allow it to become law?

March "Mad"Ness

Why is it that the year that I forget to do a bracket for the Final Four that everyone I know does one but me? It sucks, man. And, to be honest, when I don't have my own bracket (shrugs), I don't even really watch The Tournament.

Oh well. There's always next year. I will give you my undying strategy in the Final Four, though: I always pick the favorite. There's no reason not to. Everybody likes a Cinderalla story.

Not me. I like the best teams playing in the Championship game, although I really, really, really, really, really want Florida to lose. They've had their moment in the sun and it's time for them to move on.

Plus, I'm a UGA graduate and there's nothing more obnoxious than a UF grad talking about sports. Blecch.

Hell, I'm even tired of blogging about the Tournament right now, so I think I'm going to stop.

I developed an anology for why I support withdrawal from Iraq, but no one wants to read that, so it will forever remain in my Draft section of the blog. You're Welcome.

So, then, I guess there's nothing left to talk about. March is the month for March Madness, so if I don't have anything insightful to say about it, then I guess I shouldn't say anything at all, in deference to the NCAA. Hmmm.

There's another scandal involving the Bush Administration. I guess I could talk about that. I've got to be honest on this one: I don't really know what the big deal is over the firing of some U.S. Attorneys. And, as much of a vendetta I have for the Bush Administration, and even I don't care about this issue, is it really that important?

But, really, I'm beginning to wonder if Right-Wingers are playing up the following line for comedic effect: "U.S. Attorneys serve at the pleasure of the President."

Not that funny, no, but I also have the brain of a thirteen-year-old, so of course I'm going to think it's hilarious.

Educational Edification - Learning How to Teach

At least for the time being, I've figured out what I want to do with the rest of my life:

I want to teach! I know, stop laughing. You can put away your children later, lock them up, and otherwise let me know that you do not approve of me.

But for now let me indulge in a little bit of my own saga of the job search. It can be boring at times, and frustrating as well, but hopefully you can allow me this diatribe for the sake of my mental health.

Won't you?

I wouldn't be that worried about my own employability were I not caught in a veritable Catch-22. You see, I waited until March to begin looking for teaching jobs. It's not the worst time, by any means, but it's not that many steps above looking in August for an immediate, full-time job.

The thing is, I have a degree - I have two of them - from UGA and my GPA is satisfactory and all of that.

HOWEVER,

I am not certified to teach in this state (and/or any other state) and must pass a certification exam to be able to teach. The problem is, the next GACE is in May, and that's way past the acceptable time to be looking for a teaching position. Most schools have probably already begun to look at their vacancies for holes and such.

And, since most of the application process takes place online, I can give no proclamation, like, "Hey! I know I haven't been certified YET, but I'm going to take a certification exam." No no no. That won't do at all. I'll need to already have been certified to apply successfully for a job, even one as a provisional teaching license.

Which makes for the second strike against me: why hire a fuddy-duddy English guy when you can have a full-blown education major?

Ah, jeez, this sucks. I really want to teach now. I know what you're saying: why didn't you get off your hump and do it before then? And, actually, I have an answer for that astute accusation.

I didn't really begin to get excited about the idea of teaching until last week, when my roommate, who is a teacher at one of the local high schools - Go Glads! - showed me around during Spring Break. I felt all sorts of nostalgia and desperately desired to teach. Now that the effect of the trip has worn off, I STILL want to teach.

Oh well. Wish me luck, if you can find it in your heart. Sorry I've been such a slacker with the posting lately. By the way, I've begun the third novel and it's going well. I'm already almost 60 pages into it, and I think it's the most solid of my works yet. It's about a sort-of hit man chasing down a serial killer in Atlanta after his friend becomes one of the killer's victims.

Hypocrites Go to Hell - I Hope

Newt Gingrich is one of the biggest hypocrites in the United States, and even though proof of it is coming out, he's still able to hide behind his Conservative Values and the myopic Conservative Leaders. Does he really think he should run for President of the United States in 2008.

Adulterers are all over the place, but most of them have not persecuted another man for his indiscretions. The affair, too, is not recent, either. Gingrich cheated on his wife about the same time that Bill Clinton ruined his presidency by sleeping with Monica Lewinsky.

I'm not saying that Bill Clinton is a plaster saint, but I am saying that Newt Gingrich, despite his own illicit affair, is still able to get support from the right wing. I don't understand it. Oh, wait, now I do. A good bit of the right-wingers don't care what you do, as long as you're a Republican.

Unless you're a convicted Republican, of course. Tom DeLay will be publishing a book blasting the Republican Party that did not keep him from going to jail over his own indiscretions, albeit with money instead of women.

He says of Gingrich:

DeLay also said the GOP leadership was in "no moral shape" to press impeachment proceedings against President Clinton, noting that then-House Speaker Gingrich was having an extra-martial affair with a staffer while the proceedings were under way.

It begs the question: Does the Republican Party really not have its finger on the moral pulse of America? Those in the know understand I'm completely and utterly joking. Neither party, at this point, has the right to say such an irrelevant thing.

Who cares if Newt Gingrich had an affair? He's slick about it, though. I'll give him that. He's positioned himself as a moralist on the lying issue because he never lied about having an affair under oath. There is a difference, but he surely shouldn't have persecuted a man for a similar crime should he? To quote the White Stripes, You think not telling is the same as not lying, don't you?

The ultimate question is, Why would someone who has been out of the eye of politics for so long make such a claim? He's running for president. He wants to get all of his demons out in the open, let them strangle on oxygen, and then he can move on. If he doesn't, then they'll most certainly come out later, and that would be the death knell of his campaign.

We'll see, but I don't know. If Tom DeLay is calling you incompetent, then I'm really going to be skeptical for a very, very, very long time.

Hey - I'm Still Alive

I know it's been a while since my last post, but it's Spring Break for UGA down here and, even though I'm no longer in college, I have the week off, so it's been hard to get near a computer.

Today, I and several of my friends are going to the GA Aquarium and the World of Coca-Cola in Atlanta, GA (It's about an hour from Athens). We'll have fun and I hope to bring back some pictures to post!

Why Colin Cowherd is My Hero

I've been slowly stepping away from big-time Politics - notice with a capital P - at least for the time being, because I feel like I've been harping on it too much. My opinion is just that, and I feel that I bring out stories that aren't getting picked up as much. You see, I haven't touched the I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby verdict, because that's EVERYWHERE. I can give you my opinion, but that wouldn't take too long.

In short:

He's a jackass, a pawn of the lowest order, and, as a jackass, he's deserved everything he's gotten. Perjury, I'm sure, is still a crime, and I trust out legal system, so be it.

There. Done. Okay, now to the fun stuff. I highly recommend the video below, as it comes from one of my heroes on the radio, one of the guys who makes may pathetic, retail-job having life worth living, Colin Cowherd. I'm aware that most of you have never heard of him, but he's a big-time sports talk host, and the Youtube video, which is just an audio clip with pictures to illustrate the point, does him justice.



I'm in a good mood; I hope you're in a good mood. That's why I'm posting such a fun video today. This video illustrates that sports, as almost all subjects in today's world, have become contentious. Sports, I hate to say, no longer represent escapism from the "real world." There's big time money being pumped into this stuff and the NBA and NFL and MLB matter. Even college athletics matter, because millions and millions of people look up to athletes.

Oh, and if you're a Purdue fan, or a Big-10 fan, I'm sorry. Truly, truly, truly sorry. Not for the offensiveness of the video, but just because you're a Big-10 fan.

Strikeouts for Troops

I know I have a lot of links posted and you don't have much time to check them out, but there's one that pretty cool, if you get a chance. It's called Strikeouts for Troops.

Strikeouts for Troops is a foundation started by now-San Francisco Giants pitcher Barry Zito. For every time one of the players involved gets a strikeout or hits a homerun or something to that effect, that player will donate money to troops recovering at any number of VA hospitals around the nation.

The money goes to the soldiers and their families, obviously, but it helps the families fly out to where their husband/wife is staying so the healing process can be expedited with love as well as medicine.

Here's a testimonial:

My Name is SGT Scott Platts I am stationed at Ft Hood, Texas and I'm an Operation Iraqi Freedom Veteran. I would like to thank Barry Zito and the rest of the Major League Baseball players that are participating in the strikeout for troops campaign.

It is great to see that there are professional athletes out there that appreciate what we do. I have a 17.5 years combined military service and this is by far the greatest support I have seen from any of the professional athletes.

I will forever be grateful for the support they show to us service members and their families --especially my wounded comrades. In closing I would like to say that I am sure that all the men and woman will appreciate all they are doing. Thanks again,

SGT Scott Platts

There are plenty more on the site. And who's involved? Barry Zito, of course, Chipper Jones, A-Rod, Dantrelle Willis, Jermaine Dye, and lots of others.

If you'd like to donate or learn more information, Click here.

Strikeouts for Troops

I know I have a lot of links posted and you don't have much time to check them out, but there's one that pretty cool, if you get a chance. It's called Strikeouts for Troops.

Strikeouts for Troops is a foundation started by now-San Francisco Giants pitcher Barry Zito. For every time one of the players involved gets a strikeout or hits a homerun or something to that effect, that player will donate money to troops recovering at any number of VA hospitals around the nation.

The money goes to the soldiers and their families, obviously, but it helps the families fly out to where their husband/wife is staying so the healing process can be expedited with love as well as medicine.

Here's a testimonial:

My Name is SGT Scott Platts I am stationed at Ft Hood, Texas and I'm an Operation Iraqi Freedom Veteran. I would like to thank Barry Zito and the rest of the Major League Baseball players that are participating in the strikeout for troops campaign.

It is great to see that there are professional athletes out there that appreciate what we do. I have a 17.5 years combined military service and this is by far the greatest support I have seen from any of the professional athletes.

I will forever be grateful for the support they show to us service members and their families --especially my wounded comrades. In closing I would like to say that I am sure that all the men and woman will appreciate all they are doing. Thanks again,

SGT Scott Platts

There are plenty more on the site. And who's involved? Barry Zito, of course, Chipper Jones, A-Rod, Dantrelle Willis, Jermaine Dye, and lots of others.

If you'd like to donate or learn more information, Click here.

A Repost: Horror Flicks

This is a repost from The Horror Movie Blog, and I just wanted to plop it down right here, since I know a lot of people don't read that blog. As far as I know, I'm the only person who has read that blog. But it's just for my own gratification, so don't feel pressured. I know the macabre is not for everybody.

***

The one thing that horror movie fans cannot forget is that the movie industry itself is a profit-driven business. Just like any other form of entertainment media, movies are always a step behind the culture and not as creative as they would have you believe.

Take comic book movies, for example. There's a good one now and again - The 300 is a good example - but for the most part, they're all crap. See Ghost Rider. Well, don't see it. I wouldn't wish that on you.

But those of you who are relishing the surge of horror movies in the last several years, take heed:

It's hit the top of the hill. It's only going to start going down from here. It's the sad truth, and I will be the first to admit that I hate seeing it happen this way. But it was a good run and there will be another one someday. Horror movies just aren't pulling in the numbers that they were a few years ago, so it was bound to happen.

I'm sorry.

But I did find a cool panel on the Austin 360 site:

Panel of the Dead: Horror Films of Today: A dissection of how low-budget horror is killing at the box office, and how it might be at the apex of its powers. With father-son team Harry Jay Knowles and Harry Knowles (Ain't It Cool News), Eli Roth ("Hostel"), Scott Weinberg (eFilmCritic Networks), Scott Glosserman ("Behind the Mask"), Lauren Moews ("Borderland"). Roth will show a sneak peek of "Hostel II." (3 to 4 p.m. Sunday, Room 16AB, ACC)

I would love to go to that. But, for those of you who are saddened, I do have some news I'm excited about. I don't know how you will feel about it, but I'm ecstatic.

Kevin Smith is set to make a horror movie. Yep, that's right. Apparently, he's shooting two movies back-to-back - a horror and a romantic comedy - and they will come out whoknowswhen.

I'm happy, even though I think some of you may be groaning.

The comedy is actually a romantic comedy script Smith wrote with Rosario Dawson in mind to star. Smith says the budget for that project will be more than Clerks II ($5 million) but less than Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back ($22 million). So we’re guessing it will be in the safe $15-18 million range. We previously reported that Smith was looking to film part of one of his next movies in Minnesota because he needs snow. This would gel with his New York Comic Con comment.

Say what you will. This will definitely be interesting.

Also, I'm going to be posting this on the Jinx Protocol Blog, as well.

Driving Me Crazy

I like to link to things. I admit it. Hell, I have to; you've seen it.

But now that everything has gotten so cluttered, I want to have a 3-column blog. The only problem is that a lot of the ones alreay out there suck. I like my template; I just want to add another column.

Is that too much to ask?

Okay, so now off my soapbox. I'll be back to post something later.

Some People Really Don't Get Irony

I don't necessarily think I'm the ultimate skeptic - that would be an awfully arrogant thing to say - but I do think that I hold my views very dear and that some of them, most of them, actually, have been borne out of years of questioning society and social norms.

Someone at my workplace told me yesterday that I needed to "question things more." This person barely knows me, and I doubt he really questions things very much himself.

It all started because I got a fact about Rush Limbaugh wrong around him - he is a staunch conservative - and he found the right answer on the internet. Angrily, I might add (He's a lot older than I am. Twice my age, actually).

See, I'd told him that the ACLU had defended Rush in court. In actuality, they had only filed a "friend of the court" document on his behalf, defending his 1st amendment rights. Now, they didn't technically defend him in court - they weren't his lawyers - so I decided to let him have that.

But later in the afternoon, we argued about something else and pulled me into his office (did I mention that he's much higher up in the hierarchy than I am?).

The basic crux of what he said was that I needed to question social policies. Well, that's not it. Basically, he was saying that if I were to question what I believe, then I'd probably come to conservative conclusions.

How hilarious is that? I didn't get angry, but I did have a few hours of self-doubt, until I realized that it was idiotic to let a man's opinion of me make me doubt myself, especially if that man doesn't really know me very well.

Can Bush Really Imagine This?

*A while back, a mix of George Bush "singing" Imagine got passed around the liberal airwaves, and somehow a video version ended up on YouTube.*

I don't know if any of you will like this video, but maybe you should give it a chance. It's pretty chilling.

There are some pretty disturbing moments in it, and some bad language as well, so watch with caution. But who would have ever guessed that we'd get our President, George W. Bush, singing a re-mixed version of John Lennon's Imagine?



I'm not a Peacenik, but I do think there's at least some validation in not starting war for little to no reason. I've disagreed with this policy since the very outset of the war, although I, for one, trusted the President in March of 2003 when our war against Iraq started.

PS: I've included another video - which is another version entirely - at the MySpace Blog. Stop by if you get the chance.

A Ban on Paris Hilton? Where do I Sign Up?

The AP has finally tired of Paris Hilton. What took it so damned long, I ask. Apparently, the AP has decided that, unless it is n-e-w-s, the AP wires will no longer cover Paris Hilton. That's a shame. What's even more sickening is that it is now news to report that Paris Hilton is no longer news. How does that make any sense whatsoever?

The wire service's entertainment editor Jesse Washington sent a memo to staffers on Feb. 13 that said, barring any major events, the AP would not run any mention of Paris Hilton on the wire, according to the memo, which was obtained by the New York Observer.

Good riddance. But this is nothing new. Americans have always had a predilection for tawdry gossip. Our celebrities are our Royal Family, so we have to project onto their lives. It sucks, but it's the sort of thing that's always going to happen, I'm afraid, so don't get used to the idea that gossip will somehow go downhill without the airy heiress to keep your tv screen full.

Politics: A Meta-Blog

Hey out there in BloggerLand, how are things?

I tried to not let the blog get into too much political talk - there's so much out there already - but I couldn't help myself.

SO, in the grand spirit of forgiveness, give me a little, please? It just comes out sometimes, without warning, and I am just a conduit for what spews forth. I'm sorry. That's just me.

I at least try to find things that are interesting and haven't been plastered everywhere already, but I'm going to put a little effort into blogging about something else for a change in the future, unless I feel like talking Politics, that is.

Because I do like things other than the big P word. Movies, books, my two puppy dawgs, etc.

So, I guess this blog isn't about anything really but my own self-indulgence, a meta-blog, if you will. I'll be blogging some mo' later. I have something to say about Welfare Reform. Surprisingly enough, I'm for Welfare Reform.

John McCain - Back by Popular Demand

I guess my biggest problem with John McCain has more to do with my own political development than anything else. He's changing his alliances to become a solid candidate, and I guess I've never witnessed someone change so much - and yet, not so much - before my very eyes.

I think John McCain's a good person, but I'm beginning to question whether or not he'll be a good candidate. But, then again, I'm not a conservative, so I don't know that I'm the best barometer when it comes to this stuff. Maybe Mccain's a helluva candidate.

For further reading, vist therealmccain.com

Done!

I'll post something longer later, but I just wanted to say that I'm done with the first draft of my second book! Hurray! God, I could run laps around my house right now, if I weren't sick and it weren't raining.

Why I Could Not Live in Walla Walla, Washington

Fiwa, you may be able to shed some light on this subject that I cannot, because it has to do with inclimate weather. Does it rain a lot in Washington?

See, right now in Athens, GA, it's raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock, and I am about to lose my mind. It's been pouring all day, and I feel the onset of flu-like symptoms coming on.

Which, I might add, do not make me the happiest of campters. But, I suppose if I get a free day from work out of it, then it is worth it, but otherwise it'll just suck to work in crappy weather with a crappy cold. It's not like I haven't done it before.

Other than that, work sucks and I don't want to do anything fun because of the weather, so I will do what I did yesterday, which is invest a lot of time reading. I can't eve go jogging and it's killing me, so bear with me through all of this.

Luckily for you all, I don't even feel like talking about Politics today, although I am curious about the Columbine bomb threat that went down today. That happened EIGHT years ago (which speaks more to my age than anything else). Is every event that happens there newsworthy?

I dunno. Maybe I'm cynical and think that they should leave that poor damn place alone for once. Otherwise, the mouth breathers similar to the ones who committed the atrocity in 1999 will continue to spark controversy.