THE COMPLEX & TERRIFYING REALITY OF STAR WARS FANDOM

Andry Summers wrote a hilarious article on Star Wars, Fans and that love/hate relationship we all know far too well.

"There is a diabolical twist to Star Wars fandom, you see, that defies comprehension, and yet is the life-blood of all Star Wars fans. It is this: Star Wars fans hate Star Wars. If you run into somebody who tells you they thought the franchise was quite enjoyable, and they very-much liked the originals as well as the prequels, and even own everything on DVD, and a few of the books, these imposters are not Star Wars Fans. The primary fulcrum for the Star Wars fan’s hate is George Lucas, creator of Star Wars. Unlike Trekkies/Trekkers who adore Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry, Star Wars fans hate the father of their obsession......"

Continue reading HERE, it's quite funny!

CHRIS FARLEY REINCARNATED

(source)

ALIEN TATTOO OF THE DAY

OCTOLOVIN'

I love Octopus imagery... weird, huh?
Anyway, this is "TENTACLES" by JEREMY FORSON
You can buy a print for $30 here.

2ND INT'L TRANSFORMERS TRAILER

Prepare to cream your pants. And crank up that audio!

ALIENS DROPSHIP PINS

"We're in the pipe, five by five!"

Check out these lapel pins sporting images found on the side of Ferro's DROPSHIP in ALIENS! They're £13.00, so if anyone in the UK would like to buy me one HERE.

Ya know, I ask everyone to buy me stuff all the time and very rarely do you... although some of you have, and you're the ones I truly love. Now you know the key to Jimmy's heart - geeky gifts!

STAN LEE'S COMIC MOVIE RULES

Click HERE to read
STAN LEE'S 10 RULES FOR COMIC MOVIES!

HARRYHAUSEN TURNS 87

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
RAY HARRYHAUSEN
GOD AMONG US MORTALS!!

--
TRIBUTE:

SOME EARLIER WORK INCLUDED:

THE COMPLETE SKELETON FIGHT:

--

Go rent
Clash of the Titans, Jason & the Argonauts,
and The Golden Voyage of Sinbad!
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Which reminds me, I really really want those awesome
CLASH OF THE TITANS figures they recently made!!Buy me all 3 HERE!

THIS MAN, THIS MONSTER

And now, a scene from the 1994 Roger Corman FANTASTIC FOUR movie, that never saw the light of day, but thanks to bootleg copies at comic conventions, has survived:
*AUDIO IS A MUST!

"WTF?!!!" Click here.

STAR WARS TOTEM MURAL

Check out this STAR WARS TOTEM MURAL a dude painted yesterday over on Melrose.

Click HERE for some more pics and info (like address)... plus a time-lapse video of the process.





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*thanks, threelegdog!

AWESOME WEDDING

*Click on image to enlarge - seriously, check it out*

Fellow JimSmasher Jason The Destructor just sent me these pics from his sister's wedding. Sadly, they did not wear the masks during the ceremony. Nonetheless, awesome pics, dude! Thanks for sharing!

STAR WARS TATTOOS

Stealing yet another one of my ideas (kidding), you can now buy a book that spotlights STAR WARS TATTOOS. The hardcover book is 208 pages long, full-color with over 400 photos. The photos apparently "tell the story" of 45 different collectors and artists from around the Globe. The book will run ya $50 USD and you can buy one HERE or in person at the San Diego Comic Con this year. Man, I need to start turning JimSmash into a book.....

VADER FLOWER GIRL

Weird (and awesome) on so many levels.

MEL BROOKS TURNS 81

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
YOU HILARIOUS DIRTY OLD MAN!

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Go rent
Young Frankenstein, Blazing Saddles,
History of the World Pt 1 and The Producers (original)
TODAY!

JETPACK T-SHIRT MAY OR MAY NOT ALLOW YOU TO FLY

Nice.

ALIEN TATTOO OF THE DAY

This is one of the better ALIEN Tattoos I've seen. That's not necessarily saying much, as most Alien tats I see suck. But this one is pretty cool. I'm thinking he used the McFarlane ALIENS figure as reference. Overall, its pretty neat, but I do miss the back spike... and the head is a bit too elongated. ;)

NANDO FIX ADS

ORIGINAL STAR WARS TOYS SECTION

Man, I wish I could time travel!!!
And yes, that's pretty much what I'd do first with a Time Machine.
Whuh?

QUICK QWIPS

* New Line Cinema appears to be in the lead to acquire to the rights to the CONAN franchise.

* They are making a TV Series that revolves around the BATES MOTEL from PSYCHO. Hollywood is truly being run by the most unimaginitive, talentless bafoons. sigh.

* It looks like LucasArts is making a LIGHTSABER game for the Wii. It's ok, I fell out of my chair, too.

* I think DIE HARD IV is doomed... it's opening this friday against Pixar's RATATOUILLE and then Michael Bay's TRANSFORMERS this coming TUESDAY. Plus it's the 4th outing AND they toned it down to a PG-13 rating.

* SAM RAIMI is talking SPIDERMAN 4 and 5... but only if Tobey and Kirsten return. Meh. Put GYLLENHAAL in there and lose Dunst.

* As I was walking back to my car from the grocery store this morning (quick coffee & supply run before work), the Rich Bitch next to me put her coffee on the back of my car as she loaded her groceries. WTF? I seriously hate those upper class, perscription med junkie, right-to-everything assholes that live in LA. I was going to take off, dumping her coffee everywhere, but she was too fast..... it would have been worth the coffee spill on my car. Sorry, had to bitch - it really bugged me.

SPICE MOMS REUNION

Because absolutely NO ONE demanded, asked, or secretly wished for it, THE SPICE GIRLS (now in their 30s) are back together for a Reunion. Is there a single member who's not an absolute mess right now? Didn't Eddie Murphy just get outed by a DNA test as being the father to Scary Chick's spawn?And who's the hot new Tranny member on the far left? Anyone else find themselves breathing out of their mouth (instead of nose) when looking at the middle member? Alright, that's all I got. It's not great, but it's all I have. Oh wait....
Here's a clip:

ELIZABETH: THE GOLDEN AGE

Here's the main trailer for ELIZABETH: THE GOLDEN AGE,
the sequel to 1998's ELIZABETH.


Rent the first one today - It's one of my favorites!

.......wait, "1998"? Almost 10 years ago?!! Good grief, how is it possible for Time to be moving this quickly?! I need to move out of the city, me thinks.

ZONGOLIAN TRAFALGARIANS

Info, if you dare!

WALLPAPER YOU DESIRE

BATTLESTAR GALACTICA FANS

Favorite Cylon Ev-er!

NIRVANA BABY WANTS TO BORROW YOUR CAR KEYS

Saw over at Jen's place, CASUAL SLACK, that the baby on the cover of NIRVANA'S "NEVERMIND" album is now turning 16!!! Wow, it's been that long? Suddenly my life flashed before me.... some sections were just black frames, others blurry....

Oh, and I'd like to give kudos to his parents for allowing him to look like a complete doofus on Global television. Remember kids, snuffin' ain't cool! Maybe he has the same parents as Audrey, The Lexus Brat?

Crap. I AM old.

LAME LAME LAME LAME . . .

So remember those recent posts about the upcoming new TRANSFORMERS cartoon on Cartoon Network... the one with the really shitty art design... well now info is coming out that the Autobots won't be battling the Decepticons often, but instead acting like superheroes against "evil humans".

BOB HIGGINS, Senior VP Programming & Development at Cartoon Network says, "We've used the basic Transformers and characters as a springboard, but then we're pretty much reimagining the whole thing. What we're doing with it is basically turning it into a superheroes story. We're really excited that we're able to take this decades-old property and hopefully turn it into something that kids haven't seen or expected from a Transformers series before."

(source)

RARRRGGGHHH!!!!
JIMSMASH!!!!

SUPER KIDS WANT INSURANCE

Check out these fun ads for Hospital Aleman's Children's Health Insurance Plan! whew, that was a mouthful. Notice the lack of the copyrighted emblems on Batman and Spiderman.

THIS DAY IN STAR WARS HISTORY

JUNE 26, 1997 - George Lucas steps behind the Director's Camera for the first time since Star Wars and begins shooting STAR WARS: EPISODE 1: THE PHANTOM MENANCE. A great disturbance in the Force is felt, as if millions of future movie-goers suddenly cry out in terror and then suddenly silenced.

STUCKEY'S PECAN LOGS RULE ! ! !

I came home last night to find a package from my good friends Connie and Otter back east. Inside were some infamous PECAN LOGS from STUCKEY'S!!! If you know of them, then you know already they are a gift from the Pecan Gods. I haven't seen a Stuckey's in YEARS and cry yearly that I'm unable to satisfy my Stuckey's Pecan Log craving, knowing I may never be able to have one again ("Did they go out of business?"). Most Stuckey's may be gone now, but they're still in biz and have a WEBSITE! That's right, I can now order me some BOXES of these fuckers! YAY! Click HERE to buy some! I recommend the SMALL individual ones. YUM!!

ALIEN TATTOO OF THE DAY

Sometimes I truly scare myself. When I saw this Alien Tattoo, I immediately knew it was taken from the crappy AVP Alien figure from McFarlane Toys. Again, I commend the effort to get an Alien as a tattoo. But why choose such a shitty design?!

RICE BROTHERS DO STAR TREK

Twins John & Greg Rice, self made millionaires, wrote and performed several commercials for HULETT PEST CONTROL in Florida, of which they are partners. Here's one where they go all out and do STAR TREK:

You can see more HERE which include them dressing up as insects, horses, big-game hunters and Elvis. Sadly, John Rice died in 2003 at the age of 53. Read more about the brothers HERE and HERE.

INDY: THEN AND NOW

I posted the right pic the other day which is from the set of Indy IV, but saw this old pic from RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK this morning. And now I'm sharing with you guys.... Man, I love Raiders.... give it another viewing now!
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*Note: It is not called "Indiana Jones & The Raiders of the Lost Ark"... no no no, it's just fucking "RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK". sigh. Why must my life be tormented so?

AWESOME JAPANESE PACKAGING

*Click image to enlarge*
Which one is your favorite?

NEW KUBRICK ALIENS

Nice! I want this boxset something fierce!!
BUY

FANMADE POSTER: IRONFORMERS

STALLONE VS SCHWARZENEGGER

We've wanted to see it since we were 11.....

MY LITTLE PONY ALIEN

EXHIBIT A of why the idea of an Alien taking on physical attributes of its host is stupid and should be eliminated from existance:

THE MY LITTLE PONY ALIEN.

Cool custom, but this shows where you could take the Alien if you continue down that path. Please stop, Hollywood (and all those who think its a good idea) and return the Alien Mythos back to where it belongs; The Alien looks the same regardless of its host. Otherwise you get lame Alien incarnations like "Monkey Alien", "Llama Alien", "Potato Bug Alien", etc. Remember the 90s Kenner Aliens toy line? Two words: MANTIS ALIEN. *shudder*. The day you see an Alien on screen with wings will also coincide with the day Jim loses it all and the World ceases to be. Says so in the Bible. True Story.

SIGH

Here's another pic of the upcoming new TRANSFORMERS cartoon on Cartoon Network, showing more of the characters.

God hates me.

I'll hold off final judgement until I see it, but the concept design is really really shity and unfitting for the Transformers.

*Click the image to enlarge*

ATTAKUS VADER

The Attakus Vader is the coolest Vader statue I have ever seen. Nothing comes close! Besides being expensive, its also nearly impossible to find to buy even if you had the cash.

Well, I found one!
It's only $2200 USD.

So if everyone donates some money to Jimmy, I can buy it!

Click HERE to buy for me.
Otherwise email me and you can simply transfer some money to me via PayPal.

CYLON PURIFIER

Check out this water purifier!
It totally looks like a CYLON!
I WANT ONE!!!

THANKS, OTTER ! ! !

Check out this great pic Mrs Otter made for me!
YAY!!!

HELP A FELLOW JIMSMASHER OUT

The Star Treak Fan Fiction contest is nearing its end and fellow JimSmasher SCOTT KING needs our help to win some cool stuff!!! He's written 2 entries and needs some votes!

It'll only take you a minute to help, so if you please could, go here and sign up for the contest. You will then be sent an email. Click the link in your email to activate your membership. Login and after you do, go here (Temporal Convergance) and here (Quotient of Time). Scroll down to the bottom of the page and where you see “rate this story,” give both stories five stars. That's it - DONE. You've helped out a fellow JimSmasher! THANKS, EVERYONE!

And Scott says, "You don’t need to read my stories or comment or anything. I just need you to PLEASE vote and have anyone you know vote for me. The votes have to be made between now and Tuesday!"

DRAMATIC CHIPMUNK

I hesitated on posting this last week, now I wish I had.... now it's "old news". Oh well, enjoy!

It gets funnier the more you watch it.....
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*thanks, Dylan & Otter
**Ha, just saw that Andrew posted this last wednesday!

ACTOR HALL OF FAME: WILLIAM ATHERTON

JIMSMASH ACTOR HALL OF FAME

I hereby bestow upon WILLIAM ATHERTON, the crown and title of "GRAND DICKHEAD OF CINEMA!!" Atherton has a gift for portraying the absolute best dickhead in movies. With not 1, not 2, but 3 freaking stellar performances under his belt, the man is simply the absolute best DICKHEAD - the man you love to hate!!!

William Atherton was:

WALTER PECK (Ghostbusters)
RICHARD THORNBURG (Die Hard 1&2)
PROF. JEFF HATHAWAY(Real Genius)

3 Flick Famer!
--

"What are you looking at? You're laborers; you should be laboring.
That's what you get for not having an education."
--from Real Genius

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Trivia: He was born "William Atherton Knight".... in Ghostbusters, his character's name is "WILLIAM Peck"... in Real Genius, the main character is named "Chris KNIGHT". Think about THAT!

ANOTHER "KNOCKED UP" MARQUEE

PIRATES KNOCKED UP SHREK

RIPLEY'S HAIRCUT FOR ALIEN 3

They made such a big deal about her shaving her head for the role.
People are idiots.
Watch the "Director's Cut" - it's Awesome.

RANDOM FIND: KISS KNITT

*this post is dedicated to Woo and Dylan!

SO YOU'RE HOSTING AN EMBRYO

It can happen to anyone. One second, you're walking down an unpaved country road towards a mysterious light in the sky. The next, an insectoid alien ovidepositor is embracing your face in its iron grip, forcing its fleshy, pulsating delivery tube down your throat. If this scenario sounds familiar, Congratulations! You will be delighted to learn you've acquired three trendy new lifestyle accessories:

1) A conversation-starting living fashion accessory adorning your face, head, and neck;

2) A spellbinding story to tell your more open-minded friends;

3) An alien embryo gestating in your chest cavity.

To ensure a successful gestation period of the new special treasure you're bringing into the world, you're going to want to comply with the following guidelines... CLICK HERE.

(source)

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*THANKS, JEN!

HARRY POTTER 5 PICS - CRAPLOAD OF

KREACHER!! Awesome!

A whole crap load of pics from HARRY POTTER 5 HERE.

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE

As always, I'm skeptical about turning this awesome children's book into a live action full length movie. But can you blame me? Just look at Hollywood's track record so far. Cat in the Hat and Grinch should be enough. I hope they make it work.... anyway, here's a "first look" of the upcoming movie:

Is that Sweetums, screen right?!

AVP2 HYBRID BLASPHEMY

Behold the Alien/Predator Hybrid that will be the main baddy in AVP2. It looks very similar to Dave Dorman's painting from many years back.

I really don't have the energy to go into why I fucking hate this. But I WILL say: Aliens should look like the creature from ALIEN or ALIENS, regardless of it's host. That is fucking LAW. Anyway, this pic and movie makes me want to weep. Since Alien: Resurrection, FOX has been using my soul as a diarrhea dumping ground.

(source)