The Christmas Box

I had read this book years ago when I was in High School. I remember being fond of it then, and being very touched by it. Well to my surprise, my loving, and giving sister sent me an unexpected package in the mail, inside was The Christmas Box on tape. I had read it, and even have a copy of it sitting on my book shelf, but since it was on tape I threw it into the car last night as something to listen to while out and about. I put it in this morning, and I was hooked. I came home and couldn't wait to continue it when I had to leave again. I didn't want it to end. I drove home slower, and thought about going out for a drive, but needing to get the kids down for a nap, I came home and just sat in my car, out in the garage crying as I listened to it's conclusion. I had forgotten so much of it, and as I listened to this sweet, tender story, I was reminded of its message, and had a much better perspective of it now as a crazy mother of four, than I ever did as a know-it-all teenager.

I have been unexplainably grumpy lately, and no fun for my children what so ever. I've been feeling bad that I haven't made this holiday season more "magical" for them, but soon forget this guilt as I'm rushing them off to bed, getting after them for not listening, and looking forward to a moment of peace and quiet. As I listened to this sweet story I was reminded of how I felt when I became a mother for the first time. The love you have for your child is so intense, and it overwhelmed me that John (being my first born) and all of my other children would never truely know how deep, and heart felt my love for them really was. My dad always said that he wishes I knew how much he loved me, but not being much for sentiment I said yep and carried on. When I experienced that kind of love for the first time with John's birth I gained a whole new perspective on not only the love of a parent, but also of Heavenly Father's love for me. That was the message, that the first gift of Christmas is the love of a parent for a child. I know my children will someday get to experience this kind of love, but it won't be until they themselves are parents, and from now until then our relationship will always be changing. It's amazing and sometimes disheartening how quick you let the small things, and the things of no consequence let you forget this feeling (not that it ever goes away). However, as I sat out in the car, being touched by this Christmas message I thought of Heavenly Father's love for me and how often I forget it, but how I could feel it now, and also of the love I feel so deeply for my children, but which I don't express enough. I wanted nothing more than to pull each one of my children in close to me, and express my love for each one of them. I feel so great, and finally it feels like Christmas!

Family Night & The Christmas Holidays

The scrooge seems to make "her" appearance on Monday nights. Keith loved when I got after the kids, and then seconds later made them smile for the camera. We do have fun, and have enjoyed family nights with the holidays. Last week we finally decorated the tree. I have decided to carry on the tradition that I had growing up of picking out a new ornament for the tree. It's suppose to represent something that has happened, or something that we enjoy. I don't have the prettiest tree, and to be honest I'm not sure my kids find the same fun and enjoyment out of it that I did growing up, but we'll probably continue to do it. John chose the Nintendo Controller because it made sounds. I kept trying to persuade him to choose something else, but he kept telling me that this is something he likes to do (fine, whatever...). Sam chose Lightening McQueen and Sally because he really does love anything to do with the movie. Eva chose (well because she doesn't really care yet, I've been collecting the Fairy Messenge collection for her. It's just so cute!!)... And finally for Joshua, we just chose Snoopy, because...no reason, he's just a classic, and cute!

It seems like for us this year was not as momentous as last year. Last years ornaments were one of a house representing our first home. John's was a school bus for his first year of school. Sam's was a cute one that said Middle Child...Mom's Favorite. Mostly because he was the middle child, and seemed to fit every description of a middle child that I had heard. Eva had one of a little girl holding a baby, representing the year she became the big sister, and finally one for Joshua... his first Christmas. Being born on Christmas Eve made his the most memorable. Now that I spend some time reflecting, I do enjoy pulling out the ornaments each year and telling the kids why we chose the ones we did, and what they mean, or who gave them to us. After the tree we made the classic Christmas chain to help us count down. We did it in three colors. John gets to tear off the reds ones, Sam the green, and Eva the white. The kids love it, and do not let a night go by without taking one off.

Then on to tonight. Keith is out of town, the crying, the kids fighting, and the feeling like I was about to burst almost called our family night to a halt. We sat down, turned off all the lights, except for the Christmas tree, and we read from the scriptures of Mary and Joseph going to Bethlehem, and of baby Jesus laying in a manger. It's amazing what the scriptures can do for your spirit! Josh and Eva were still crying, and Sam and John were not really paying attention, but I became calm. It made everything a little bit better. John finally gave his attention when my voice cracked as I was reading. It was so nice to stop and read about the Savior, and to remember that this is what it's all about. I told the kids of my love for him, and also for his mother. It was one of those brief moments that the Spirit was able to get in. After the lesson the kids were anxious to move onto the night's activity...decorating our gingerbread house. John and Sam worked on the house. Eva had a cookie, but just worked on eating the frosting. Sam kept getting after her not to eat the glue. For a kid who only eats the frosting off of donuts, cakes, and cookies I was amazed that he never clued in to how yummy this "glue" really was.

My Little Helpers

I've got such great helpers for children. I hear John the other day say "OH NO!", when I ask "What?" his only response is "I promise I put them away". So I hurry and get in the kitchen to find Sam and Joshua sitting on the floor eating donuts. Sam, looking guilty, said "I just wanted to share". Joshua was covered in chocolate, and what you can't see in the picture are the smashed donuts and chocolate frosting spread all over the floor leading to the box of donuts that had all the frosting licked off.

Then the other day I was getting ready and heard Josh in his bed crying, but then he stopped, so I assumed he must have fallen back to sleep. I finished getting ready, and then went to clean up the house when I see Eva sitting on the floor in the boys room. I go in and find why Josh had quit crying. Eva decided to empty the bookcase into his bed. What a good sitter? He was happy, and she was very proud of herself for helping.

I like the fact that in their view they are helping, and sharing. In a way it's nice seeing the things that I keep trying to teach them be expressed, even if it's not necessarily the way I imagine.

Thanksgiving

What a wonderful thanksgiving! We were fortunate enough to have Keith's parents, and sister, Samantha fly out to be with us. Including Michelle and her family who live close by, we had 13 of us. It was fun, and made the work of preparing the meal worth every minute. Keith's family is so great, and I'm very grateful for all they do to support us, and show us their love. I feel blessed, not only this time of year, but always to be apart of such a wonderful family!

Although it's a week past, I'd still like to take some time to list only some of the things I am grateful for. First, my family. Keith is an amazing father, and wonderful husband. As much teasing I may endure from him, he brings a lot of laughter to our home. He helps out so much, and does so without being asked. I really do appreciate him, and our children adore him. They are very lucky. My children bring me so much joy. All I ever wanted for myself was to be a mom. They are truly a blessing. I love them so much!! I am grateful for both the family I was born into, and for the family I married into. I love them, and like I said before, feel very fortunate to be able to have such wonderful people by my side for eternity. Friends, come next. Friends have more meaning to me now, than they ever did growing up. I feel so blessed by the people who have come into my life. As I look back, to each time of my life, to the different places we've lived, I can identify someone who has very much been an answer to my prayers. Friends have become our family while we are away from home. I value each of my friends so much, I wish I could identify each one of you out loud, but I hope I've been able to communicate to you over the years how grateful I am for you!!!! And last, but certainly not least, I am grateful to have a testimony of this wonderful gospel, and of our Savior! As I look at my life and see different paths I could have taken, I am grateful for the knowledge, and the testimony I had, to make the choices I did. I love my life, and can't say there's anything I would change.

Tagged

I have been blog tagged by Michelle, so the deal is that I need to list 6 facts or hobbies or habits that I have that hopefully I have not spoken about previously in my posts. I'm sure most of you think I'm a bit odd anyway, this will confirm all suspicions.

#1 - I've got a weird obsession with numbers, I always have. When I was younger my family (who on the majority, also has a liking for numbers) and I would play this game Krypto. You lay five numbers down, and put one in the middle. You can add, subtract, multiply, and divide the five numbers to get to the one in the middle wins the hand. I love this game, but I got carried away with it. It got to the point that whenever I saw a group of numbers (addresses, license plates, phone numbers...) I was trying to work any combination of them to get to one of the others. I haven't played this game in quite a while, mostly because it's hard to find anyone who likes math like I do. However, I have seen some of these skills start to bud in John. I see the way his mind works, and I get excited for my game buddy in the making. My obsession with numbers is also expressed when I stop for gas and I make every effort to land on the whole dollar. If not, then at least an even, round number. I use to be really quick, and could do practically any math problem in my head, but now I find myself pulling out a calculator just to balance the checkbook (I blame it on my kids).

#2 - My other obsession - game shows. I'm going to make of list of things to do before I die, being on a game show is one of them. Not because I'm brilliant, and have a head full of knowledge, that's the farthest thing from the truth. I just enjoy them. My favorite is "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire". It's on from 10:00-11:00 each morning. I'm usually trying to get Joshua to sleep sometime during that time, so I'll flip it on. If I don't have anything I'm trying to get done, then I'll turn it on, but I usually try not to because I totally get sucked in. The other day I recorded two of the shows because I wanted to see how the contestants who were on previously ended up doing. When Keith saw this he said he was embarrassed for me. I also like Jeopardy, and even admittedly recorded some of the shows as well when Ken Jennings was on (I'm sure any of you fellow game show geeks will now who he is). The other show I would love to do, but find the reality of ever doing is Amazing Race. I love that show, and wish I had the drive, and the personality to do something like that.

#3 - I've been lucky enough to live in a few places. I grew up in Utah, then moved out to Indiana for Keith to go to Business School. From there we moved to Charlottesville, VA. I loved it there, and was so wishing that we would end up back there. Keith didn't like the work for GE there, so he opted not to. After Virginia it was up to Albany, New York. Actually a town North of there, called Clifton Park. We moved there the week between Christmas and New Years. It was so cold, but it was fun to live there. We were able to go to Boston a few times, to NYC, Vermont (Joseph Smith's birthplace), Palmyra, and all the little towns in between. Then finally here to Louisville, KY. It's been fun, and a really nice place to raise a family.

#4 - My hobbies are like fads. None of them really stick around too long, but eventually they make their return. I consider some of my hobbies to be scrap booking, cooking, sewing, making family home evening kits, and now "blogging".

#5 - I was fourteen years old when I started working for this family owned restaurant in Utah called "The Italian Village". I was trying to earn money for a school trip to France. I started out as a Bus Girl clearing tables, and then to Hostess, and then Waitress. I worked there for nine years, right up until the night before I went into labor with John, and then again briefly when I was pregnant with Sam. I also worked at United Health Care as a claims processor for about nine months while I was in college.

#6 - I'm a total night owl. It's a learned behavior. It use to be a joke that a light was always on at my house growing up. I seem to work best from the hours of 10:00-2:00. However, I do believe in the concept of "beauty sleep". I'm not getting my sleep, and hence do not look so beautiful most days. I roll out of bed. Once I'm up, I'm up for good, but I usually am not up early enough to really do anything with myself. I'm trying to change this though. It should be embarrassing enough for just me that I'll let myself walk out the door looking like I do sometimes, but I'm realizing that soon enough my kids will be to the age where they'll be embarrassed to be with me if I continue like I do. That, and I probably should grow up one of these days and have more control over my house. I think the mature, responsible behavior would be to actually get up before my kids, get ready, and then get them up for the day, but we all know...I'm far from mature and responsible.

Alright, there we have it. Thanks Michelle for giving me the opportunity to admit my quirks. I now tag (and will try to avoid tagging any of my friends that have been previously tagged)...Amy, Jill C., Noelle, and Rosy. Good luck, and I look forward to reading yours.

Our little Pilgrim

Sam's preschool put on a Thanksgiving Program and Lunch for all the parents. Sam was a pilgrim. He was right in the center of the group, and kept leaning forward to knock some of the "Indian" feathers off the little girls in front of him. He had a fun time, and it was so fun to see him. He has loved school, and especially loves his teacher Ms. Kelly. I have to say how thankful I am for her. She is so awesome, patient, and kind. We couldn't have asked for a better teacher. Sam has really thrived under her influence. He wants to make her proud and happy (and us too, but we're an afterthought). It was fun too, because Aunt Chellie was able to come and watch (however, she ended up watching my other munchkins more). The kids love her so much. We are very lucky to have her so close by. I was glad too to have her with me. The Pastor of the church where Sam has school sat at the table with us. Converstation eventually lead to where we were from. One lady at the table said she had always wanted to go to Utah, but that she has always been a huge fan of The Osmonds, in fact even considered becoming Mormon to meet them. The Pastor seemed to grimace. He said he had gone out to Utah to visit family who had moved there from Colorado, but who were not Mormon. I made the mistake of asking if they liked it (because I knew what the answer would be) - he said no. Converstation just went to a lull, and then a couple of minutes later he did list some of the beautiful attributes to the state. Anyway, it was a great event, and fun to see Sam have the spotlight for a change!

The Men of this House

Keith went out of town this week and he gave John his "You're the Man of the House" speech. So the other night after I got the boys to bed I hear John getting after Sam - "Sam - get in bed".."Sam, get in Bed!!"..."Sam, GET IN BED!!"..."I'm the man of the house and you need to listen to what I say". I went in to deal with the problem, and told John that I'll be the parent, and that Sam (who by the way was sitting on the floor reading books) was just fine. John broke down crying saying he was so confused, that Dad had told him that he was the man of the house, but that I told him not to act like a parent. I hugged him, and told him that I appreciate his effort, and that it's great having such a man in the house. A couple of days later in the car I hear this conversation:

• John: Sam, when Dad's gone I am the "Man of the House", but when I'm in school you get to be the "Man of the House".


• Sam: I'm not a man, I'm just Sam and I'm a boy.


• John: Just make sure you're always helping mom.

We park the car, Sam jumps out and yells "Woohoo Mom, I'm the Man of the House!". John, however, was quite the little man. I saw John this past week settle arguments over toys, hug Eva whenever she was sad, play with Joshua, and clean up without being nagged. The title of "Man of the House" seemed to bring out a mature, responsible side of John (some of you, I know, already have told me you think he's such a little man in a boy's body). It got me thinking about a few things. First, I'm glad that my boys have such an awesome example as Keith to know what being a "Man of the House" should be. Second, that John is such a good boy, and his heart is so tender, and so big. Third, how scary it would be if Sam really was the man of the house - YIKES! We have some work to do, before that title can be bestowed upon him.

So It Begins

Well after secretly (or so I thought) observing so many wonderful, and adorable blogs for so many of my talented friends, and family, I've started one of my own. Actually thanks to my loving sisters (in-laws), they started one for me. And a HUGE thanks to my friend Lacey who made it look so cute!! Now I just need to change my password so there are no more postings from my humorous sis-in-law claiming to be me. And no, to any who may have believed her, my birthday is not November 25, and I'm not turning 35. I'm going to try and hold onto my 20's for as long as I can (102 more days - who's counting). Anyway, I look forward to sharing this whole blogging world with many of you. Keith even said he'd share some of the fun of writing on the blog. I'm loving the idea of being able to count this as our family journal. It's so much more fun this way, anyway here we go...

Breaking and Entering

I warned Jen that if I didn't see any blogs on her site I would break in and create my own. Truly the temptation was great to write a blog as if from Jen's hand, I thought about going on and on about her fabulous sister in law (me), but I regret that even I have enough of a conscience to not forge her hand, besides with the whole Pottery Barn drama I didn't want to send her to the nut house. So because I am not under a pseudo name I suppose I can not be as free as I might otherwise. However, I am wracking my brain to think of something shocking to post that might spur Jen into writing her own rather than deal with the crap that I post for her. Oh, I know!!!! I should write something incorrect she hates things out of order!! This is perfect... don't forget Jen's birthday on November 25Th she likes tons of presents and phone calls you only turn 35 once. Hee Hee (I am laughing here at home. I think I am hilarious!)