Week 16

Month: 3(end) or 4 (beginning)
Weight Gain: 7 lbs

Journal Highlights:

December 8th:
Anyone here like prune juice? I tried mixing it with other juices and it is disgusting. My grandma and I have found a new topic though...;)

December 10th:
Cry myself to sleep headaches. I wasn't expecting that! But every pain is a reminder of my body working hard to grow your eyelashes. I can't wait to see those eyelashes blink at me and know that all of this was worth it because it gives me you.

December 12th:
Nausea is finally subsiding and I feel so good lately. We have started moving to my parent's basement because as great as the Bungalow is, I really need a bathroom a little closer and a little warmer. I think I will drink more water for you knowing that the pot is only feet away.

December 14th:
Kick! Now I know for sure- I've been feeling them lately a little but today I knew for sure! That was you! Jay says you must have made friends with Jackie Chan in the pre-existence. I wonder if you are going to be a really active baby running and jumping off of the furniture.

December 24th:
I am starting to show for reals now. Did I mention that I love food now? That could have something to do with gaining a lot of weight in a short amount of time (what is it now? 6 or 7 pounds?...)! I'm not complaining though, I want you healthy and I am so excited that my belly is starting to poke out. It's funny though cause I can suck it in and I look the same as I did when I was just 9 weeks with you but then I poke it out so I look really BIG. It's so much fun for your daddy and I to finally see that you are growing.

Week 13

Month: 3
Weight Gain: 3 lbs

Journal Highlights:

November 15th:
My birthday. I got to hear the most precious little heartbeat. The doctor didn't have me scheduled for a few more days but the only thing I wanted on my day was to hear you. And they let me have my wish! Alive and well with a heartbeat of 162. It was the most amazing experience of my life and I felt so much love for you in that moment. I felt like I was on Oprah and she had just given me my life-long wish. Have you ever seen someone's reaction when they win a million dollars? That was mine. Pure bliss. It was the sweetest experience and I will remember it forever.

November 17th:
Still feeling yucky. I have some good days, a lot of rough ones. Mom has been so awesome for feeding us! Thanks momma!

November 22nd:
Thanksgiving. We went shotgun shooting with the Weights and Whites and Jay and I and you were such a good team (although grandma didn't approve of you and me being involved). It was so much fun though and we did good!

Later in the day we drove down south for a get together with Jay's side of the family. Everyone was pregnant! I was so jealous of their bellies. One of the women was 37 weeks, almost there and her belly was so big. The next one was 21 weeks, and you could see her belly for sure- so cute. Then there was one more who was going to have a baby 2 days before your due date so she was 13 weeks also! And she even had a belly! Where is mine?!!! I just have to be patient and wait till you show yourself a little more- I wonder how long this will take. Maybe if I eat a lot of Thanksgiving dinner you will "show".

Week 9

Month: 2
Weight: 117


Journal Highlights:

October 2nd: Nausea. Food is disgusting. Throwing up sometimes, not always but always feel like I must.

October 21st: Acid reflex, big time dragon in my throat with fire!

October 22nd: I got food poisoning. I threw up all night and finally asked Jay for a blessing. After that I was able to take a bath and suck on a fruit popsicle and started to feel better. So thankful I didn't have to go to the ER.

October 24th: I felt something different- couldn't be? I thought I felt a goldfish do a summersault in my belly. Could have just been gas...excited to think that could be my first "flutter".

Oct. 27th: Still can't stand food- smells especially but I am always starving. Mom stepped in and was my angel; she started making dinners for me. I don't know what I would have done without her. I think because of her I survived the next few weeks.

Goodbye Bungalow

With a baby on the way we decided to say goodbye to our beloved Bungalow.


We fit EVERYthing in that closet- I should have taken a better picture of the inside- lots of storage. I'm pretty sure it took us 2 whole days just to move our stuff out of there.


The fridge fit nicely in the corner and then the white cabinet we used for dry goods like cereal and snacks.


This was the random awkward shelf on the wall that was directly across from the couch which made the 10 feet width of the bungalow room feel like a 2 foot passageway you had to hold your breath and squeeze through.


Instead of getting new bedding I spruced it up a little with Ross specials. I love my pillows and woven blanket.


That wood fireplace kept us toasty warm these past few months.


I should have gotten a better picture of the dresser but we bought that at DI- real wood and dove tailed drawers with a mirror attached. We got that baby for $70 and that is where I got ready in the morning.


This is the couch we scored at a yard sale. I love our couch it's so comfy and the color so warm.


Later I got nice grey cubes to fit perfectly in the three spaces on "the bench".

We did good on the tile huh? So Pretty.


Well, that was it. That was the Bungalow. We lived there.

Boy or Girl?

I am having my first ultrasound next month where I will most likely see what gender my baby is. In the meantime however, I researched very scientific ways of predicting what colors I will be decorating with:


1. Carrying Position. If you are carrying high, you are having a girl. If the bump is low, it is a boy.

-Me: Low. Boy.



2. Ring test. Using a string, hand your wedding ring over your belly. If it swings back and forth, expect a girl; swinging in a circle promises a boy. The opposite is true (back and forth means a boy) if you hold a necklace over your hand.

-Me: Sometimes circle but usually ending up in a straight line on my hand. Boy.



3. Acne. If hormones cause you to break out a bunch it's a girl. If you are glowing and never thought your skin looked better it's a boy.

-Me: First trimester I broke out a bunch. Now I look awesome with a few breakouts...So tie on this one.



4. Cravings. If you are craving more sweet things, it's a girl. If it's more salty/sour/spicy it's a boy.

-Me: Definitely sour and salty!!! All the time. Boy.



5. Moodiness. If you are extra moody, it's a girl. If you are happy and content, boy.

-Me: It really hasn't been that bad- Jay says PMS was way worse. Guess another point for a Boy.



6. Chinese Gender Chart. You enter your birth date and your baby's due date and it just predicts what the gender is.

-Me: It said Boy.



7. Side you rest on. If you are more comfortable on the right side then it's a girl. Left means a boy.

-Me: Boy. I have been preferring my left side more than usual and the right side kind of bothers me actually.



8. Dad's weight gain. If daddy gains sympathy weight it's a girl.

-Me: Jay hasn't gained an ounce. Boy.



9. Morning Sickness. If you had a lot of morning sickness that seemed to last throughout the day and past the 1st trimester it's a girl. Smooth sailing means boy.

-Me: Girl. Maybe a few points for this one. It was rough. Does that mean if I am having a boy that a girl will be even worse...yikes.



10. Protein. When a pregnant woman craves cheese and meat count on a boy.

-Me: Okay then, boy. I eat so much cheese......



11. Hair. If your hair has begun growing on your legs like crazy it's probably a boy.

-Me: Point for Girl! Nothing has changed in this department.



12. Headaches. If you have had an increase in headaches, you might be carrying a boy.

-Me: Yep. Boy. My headaches were a little on the dramatic side- very painful headaches.



13. Graceful vs. Clumsy. What do you think? Graceful is going to be a girl and clumsy will be a boy.

-Me: I haven't necessarily been clumsy but I get scared I will fall more easily and worry about it more....tie?



14. Dreams. If you dream the sex of your baby, you are carrying the opposite.

-Me: hmm.. I dreamed of a little girl with brown curly hair and green/blue eyes. Does this mean it will be a boy with blond hair and brown eyes? Point for Boy then.



15. Names. When thinking of names, the names that fit the gender of your baby will stand out more or you will be able to agree upon the name of the correct gender.

-Me: Interesting. I had the PERFECT little girl name and it just hasn't felt right...when I finally thought of a boy name it feels like that will be a name I use...weird. Point for Boy again.



16. Heart Rate. If the heart rate is 150 or below, it's a boy. A higher rate will indicate a girl.

-Me: 150 on the dot the 2nd time I heard the heart beat. The first time was much higher- 162 or something like that.



17. Movement. If your baby is more active, it's a boy.

-Me: This baby is a mover. Even when we went to the doctor and we listened for the heart rate it was moving all over the place making it hard to hear the little heart! Boy.



18. Cold Feet. Colder feet will indicate a boy.

-Me: I've just been colder all over. I guess that counts as my feet. Okay, point for Boy.


Okay, the Grand Total:

Boy: 16
Girl: 4


According to this it is looking like it's going to be a boy.

What do you think?
Do you think these wive's tales hold any truth?
Let the voting begin! I'd love to hear any guesses!

Karate!

Okay, that was not gas.

That was my baby.
With a head-butt or
some kung-fu action.


I have been feeling little movements, or so I thought- but how do you know for sure if it's the baby or if it's just some gas or your body doing weird things like it does nowadays.


Well, today was the day I knew.
I knew it was my baby.

Coolest feeling in the whole entire world.
Who thought pregnancy could be this sweet?

POP!

It is official.

Usually I wake up and look skinny.
Plus, I've been feeling a whole lot better than the first 3 months. I've been feeling great (except for the occasional headaches and heartburn).
But really, some days it's almost easy to forget that I'm even pregnant.

Then, when I role out of bed and see my little blub it just looks like I'm a little chubby, not pregnant. I go, "Huh, I wonder when I will start showing..."
Well...hold on, let me be completely honest: I've seen glimpses. Like at the end of the day, when I've had a nice big dinner it looks bigger and I can stick it out if I slouch.

But today. Oh man. Today- I got out of bed and what did I see? My stomach popping!!!! TotALLY sticking out, I mean wow. Really, like it just happened literally overnight. In the morning it was sticking out!

So I'm pregnant and I look it! I am so excited, I just have been waiting for this day and its here!!! Just had to document this momentous occasion.
Baby bump pics coming soon.

Thankful- *mushy alert*-

In the spirit of Thanksgiving I must say that I am so grateful to have the most wonderful, sincere, patient man I could ever imagine loving me.

He is my best friend and the other day we were laughing and joking and he turned to me and said the cutest thing ever. He said, "Aubrey, you are my best friend. In fact, I would ask you to be my best man!" I'm guessing that is a guy way of saying I love you. Because after he said that and after I thought how cute it was, I started thinking about how that would in no way have been possible...for obvious reasons.

-I don't know how I ever got so lucky to have such a great shoulder to cry on and arms to hold me and smile to brighten my day.
-He kills all the scary spiders I find.
-When I get angry he is able to laugh and make it all not a big deal anymore.
-When I have a hard day, he asks if he can give me a massage and the stress just melts away.
-When I am too sick or tired to make dinner, he doesn't complain, he just jumps right in and helps me out.
-He helps with the dishes (ha Les, it's been a year and he still helps with them!)
-He says I'm beautiful without makeup on and says I love you every day, maybe a few times everyday and gives me kisses when he leaves for school.
-He encourages me to do what I love. He is always striving to do better and he makes me want to be a better person too.

And then we just have so much fun!!! We are playful and laugh together and find humor in things that are just plain dumb. We have tickle fights and do silly voices and sing really loud together. I could have never imagined to have such joy in my life and he brings so much to it.

I see him forever.

I love you Jay! Always!
Thank you for everything you do and everything you are!
You are the best.

I Hearbeat my Birthday

This birthday was the best birthday I have ever had, other than the number- 23! whoa. I remember moving to provo, being 15ish and having young women leaders that were 23 and I oh boy I thought they were old;)

I just feel oldish now, that's okay, I'll get over it.

Let me tell you why Novemeber 15th, 2011 will go down in history as one of my all time favorite birthdays. Can you guess? If you have talked to my mom, you already know. (Or if you have looked at her status on facebook). Or Maybe you are just a great detective and from my previous posts or from the items I have been collecting on Pinterest and already figured it out.

So my present, the best present anyone could ask for on their birthday....


I got to hear the best thing in the
whole
entire
world...








............................................................A precious little heartbeat <3 <3 <3.

Grandma Saves the Day!

As I flipped the french toast, I knew something wasn't right. Why is it so warm in here?

"I think I'll sit down a minute" I murmured.

Grandma was busy cutting some vegetables for her lunch. Funny that our meals finally matched up today- Jay and my breakfast and her lunch. We stayed out late for the third weekend in a row so we slept in on our Saturday.

"Are you feeling ok?" Grandma looked over, a worried expression crossing her brow.

"I think so, I just feel a little light-headed."

No big deal, just sit down and I'll feel better. Oh wait, I need to get that french toast off the pan on the stove top or it's going to burn. I feel so hot. Maybe I should wait till I feel better.

......

The next thing I remember is my grandma's face above me, blurry and I can barely hear her- you know just like in the movies- she's asking me if I'm okay. She says some more things and tells me to stay there.

I am on the ground, I see that. I'm by the stove and the sink. How did I get there? Why am I on the floor? I don't remember coming over here at all.

Jay's there and I'm finally starting to understand what must have happened, it was all so surreal. I'd never fainted before, I had no idea it would be like that.

We laugh and joke about it a little and tell our different accounts of the event.

My grandma, eyes wide, says, "You started wobbling and you went limp started falling and luckily I was there to catch you and make sure your head didn't hit the stove- you were falling towards the stove- and then I lowered you to the floor as far as I could and you fell a little bit of the way!"

Yes, thank goodness! Can you believe that? I just didn't think it would actually happen- but now I know some symptoms that I will not ignore if I ever encounter these in the future:
1. Feeling light-headed
2. Feeling really warm all of a sudden
3. Sound starting to be muffled

Kind of cool that I fainted for my first time right? I don't know why I think that's cool except for the fact that nobody got hurt and it wasn't something that's happened before or something that you even see everyday, let alone experience. Except now I'm paranoid about doing things like taking a shower now...

So have you ever fainted before? What was it like? Similar to my experience, like the movies? What happened? I'm really curious now.

Pioneers must have been really cold

I know you hear stories all the time of the pioneer's trials and hardships.
I guess it just hasn't become real to me until recently as the cold weather has begun to roll in and Jay and I chop firewood to keep us warm at night.

Even the trek didn't make me really sit and think about what it really must have been like for them.

Well, the Bungalow, as you know, isn't fully equipped with today's wonderful conveniences that we like to call necessities- like a bathroom and heater for example. So at 3 o'clock in the morning when you gotta go, it isn't just roll out of bed, stumble to the bathroom 5 feet away.

We are talking get up in the freezing cold (we've gotten better about making good hot fires that last all night so that part isn't so bad) finding some clothes to put on and a coat and shoes and walking outside, crossing the yard to the door to the main house.

Oh wait, how could you forget the key to the house! You knew it was locked and this has happened before; oh yah it's three in the morning and you aren't thinking straight- go back to the Bungalow, grab house key and cross the yard in the freezing cold again. By this time you are pretty much awake and use the restroom and head back outside. Now, fully waking up like this with the freezing cold night chill, you crawl back into bed and you are wide awake.

So this doesn't happen every night but you get the idea. And it just makes me think how easy my life probably still is from the pioneers. I just can't even imagine.
What's going to happen when it snows!?!!! Anybody got any pioneer stories for inspiration? I could possibly be interested in them asap;)

Dedicated to that rusty old thing.

Honda's are the best right?
Well my little 90 honda has over 260,000 miles on it and everybody says they are the best so that's what we stuck with when we purchased our new and improved Honda Accord.

Our new car is....
Get this: 7 years newer than the last one!
Only has a little bit of chipped paint in a few select areas.
Smells funky....jay's been working on that...he bought 3 bottles of febreeze....it's better now.
It's the SPECIAL EDITION...whatever that means.
It has a spoiler.
Everything seems to be working awesome.
Only has 108,000 miles on it, plenty of life left.
We bought it off of ksl for 3k.
I think it's going to work well.

But...

Why do I skip over it and drive my old honda around still?
Why does it just feel good to drive it, even though I know what it looks like to everyone else?
Why does it just fit me so well? I'ts given me so much grief right? I just don't remember now. Was it all that painful?

It's so weird; I love that little rusty old car. It's been pretty good to me.
I'm going to miss you my honda.

Once Upon a Mental Breakdown

Yep, it's happened.

Did I mention that I signed up for Anatomy and Microbiology? And that I am planning on signing up for Accounting online so I can have all these classes done before February so I can make the deadline for applying for the nutrition program at BYU. These are the courses that must be done to apply for the program, and of course in my 4ish years of going to school have I taken any of them? Nope. So I gotta take them now. All at once.

That's not so much a problem but apparently anatomy is very, very difficult. And UVU makes it even more difficult. I was warned if I have to take anatomy do not take it from UVU.

Why, I scoffed. So it's hard, big deal. Of course it's hard- and you just have to study and work hard. Hard work never killed anybody.



Let me sum it up for you: 2nd quiz= Aubrey is a mental case.


Do other people cry when they take this class? Do I really have what it takes? What am I made of? (ha ha, no pun intended).

Update on the Bunglaow

The Bungalow is almost at a place where I might post before and after photos!!!

Here is what we have done so far:
1. scraped paint off floors
2. tiled floors
3. removed black mold baseboards
4. found and painted new baseboards (thanks to ksl.com I got a great deal!)
5. grouted floors
6. sealed grout in main room....twice.
7. moved furniture in
8. found non-existing space to put junk (ie. under bed, under dresser)
9. oh yah, found a great dresser from DI.
10. planned what to do with random awkward shelf on the wall
11. Found curtains (ksl...again, and clearance at wally world)

Still need to do before I will post pictures:
1. move kitchen junk that didn't fit in the Bungalow somewhere other than Grandma's living room
2. make random awkward shelf a bench
3. seal the grout in the closet
4. hang up revolving shoe organizer (My absolute favorite shoe thing I've had in my whole life btw!!!! totally recommend)
5. find out what to do about ugly side of free bookshelf I found on ksl.com
6. Fix cute outside light I damaged unwrapping :(
7. Hang up shelf organizers that go on the wall in the closet


Okay so I could keep going on all the little projects I want to do but I won't because you probably won't understand until you see before and after pictures anyway.

I guess it depends on how long everything takes me and if I get over this darn lung infection and have energy to move...oh yah and study.

Well, it's all coming along nicely and I can't wait until I'm all done!

Black Mold

I haven't been feeling well.

Well, let's say that again: every time I breathe in I feel like someone is stepping on my chest and smashing it in. This makes it difficult to breathe.

Could it be an upper respiratory infection? My head is killing me too- Jay didn't get any sleep last night because it hurt so bad and couldn't find a comfortable position and tossed and turned.

Apparently my little painter's mask didn't really do the trick. Note to self: next time I ever have to deal with black mold: invest in a heavy duty mask for ultimate protection.

I am starting to wonder if all of this is really worth it....

The Bungalow

Have I told you about where we are moving?

Where you ask? Oh, it's going to be somewhere nice and quiet and cozy, tucked away from the world.

My grandpa's old workshop.

Do workshops have running water typically? Do they have a bathroom? Nope.

No need to read it again...you read that correctly.

And it may surprise you to know we are not the first to attempt this feat.

This "room" is 10 by 20 feet. That's not very big. I bet IKEA could do something amazing with the space and I have spent hours looking through their catalog for inspiration.

There is a good sized closet in the back: about 5 by 10 feet. And my grandma would let us use the kitchen inside and one of the bathrooms in the main house.

First, my two cousins went to school and made the place more of a room by putting up sheet rock. Then one of those cousins got married and the happy newlyweds lived there for two years! My cousin's wife added some beauty to the place by adding baseboards and moldings.

And why are we willing to live here you might ask. Simple: money. Well, no money that is. Does that explain why I am willing to live like a pioneer? Rent free baby.

So this week I have been scraping the old paint off the cement floors(my grandma painted it when my cousin and his wife moved out) and it has been a good 4 day job. I really really wanted something other than cement as the floor and my grandma said she would buy the tile for us!!! To get one sqare foot takes about 10-15 minutes...yah it's hard work and I'm sore- good workout but I think the finished product will be worth it.

Well, prepping for the tile floor, I removed the baseboards and lo and behold.....

BLACK MOLD. DUN dun dun.

Yah, gross! And dangerous. I didn't know what to do. We figured out it was from the place flooding the week before from the irragation my grandmother gets to water her back lawn. Okay, so to stop it from growing it can't be fed (get wet again) so now we are watching the irragation very carefully. But now what to do with the black mold?

I called around to get an estimate on how much it would cost for a professional to get in there and remove it and the guy was very cryptic on the price but I finally wore him down so he told me that after all the air testing and special tools they use to make sure it is gone, that it would be somewhere in the ballpark of $1,000 for this small room. Wha-wha-WHAT?!!! That defeats the whole purpose of us living in this thing. No way. I kindly thanked him for his time and promptly began searching the internet for better, less expensive ways to be rid of the beast.

I came across a few articles on black mold and apparently clorox is a big no-no, for once the mold is dry it can become airborne and if the bleach were to cling to these little airborne particles, they could become even more toxic. After reading and reading I finally decided to go with a product that is non-toxic and very inexpensive: Vinegar. I equipped myself with vinegar and gloves and a painter's mask and got to work. It was slow and tedious and every time I wiped the wall, some would end up on the floor- so after the walls were clean I went back over the floors to make sure there were no traces left. After about 5 hours, the mold was gone. Phew.

This is some project, I tell you what. Stay posted for before and after photos of course;)

Meeting in the Middle

Jay and I are living under separate roofs in different cities.

No, we didn't have a fight... I just had to finish out my nanny job while Jay immediately began working in Provo (thanks to my cousin-in-law). It's great and everything, Jay working out there, especially because now that is where we plan on living and going to school and everything. He's living with my parents...while I'm living with his... ha ha.

First night was weird- the bed was big and empty so I piled my clean laundry on his side in hopes it would fill up space and not make the bed feel huge. I woke up with the clothes all on the floor, guess Jay was right about defending his side. Myth is now fact.

So Mandi is into theater and it's so fun because she will get us tickets when she is in a play so she is now in Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat at the Hale theater and gave us some free tickets to watch her.

It couldn't have come at a better time as it provided Jay and I an excuse to meet up in SLC and have a date. The play was amazing by the way, go see it! And Jay and I even splurged on a meal at Olive Garden (I seriously have forgotten how expensive it is to eat out!!!! I feel like some kind switch has gone off in my brain telling me how many hours I have to work to trade for one pasta meal and I can't switch it off anymore...it might be stuck that way now). Oh well, it tasted fantastic and I did enjoy it, so that's all that matters right?

It feels so weird to be dating your husband, not living under the same roof! I miss that goofy grin of his:( This week needs to hurry!!!

Me vs. Old Man

Finally the day was here.
I have been training (off and on) for a few months now and I knew I could run the distance of 3.2 miles. Well,kind of.

Flashback

I remember my weight training class in high school: my teacher telling me that if I couldn't run for 10 minutes straight I would lose participation points. I could see others doing it but I don't know if I just really wasn't active enough or if I just psyched myself out, but I couldn't run that 10 minutes that day.

The mile run? I came in last at 13 minutes, panting and feeling like I was going to die or throw up.

My sister, Cassy, would "run" with me but really it was about the calories for us: as long as your legs are going up in the air, distance didn't mean anything, as long as you were bouncing up and down, even in place, you were losing more calories than walking so that's what we would do.

My Inspiration

Honestly, what inspired me to start running at all was Dean Karnazes book documenting his experience running 50 marathons..... in 50 days....in 50 different states. This crazy man talks about running like it really is:

"Running is not fun. It's too hard to be fun...
I'm not saying that running doesn't feel good. It does feel good, in the way that any form of hard work feels good to those who have a taste for it...
Running teaches you that there's a difference between working hard and feeling bad. Consumer culture tries to teach us otherwise. How many television commercials talk about 'making life easier'? If everything you knew about life came from TV, your goal would be to live the easiest, most comfortable and unchallenging life you possibley could. You would believe that the only good feelings are sensual pleasures such as the taste of a good soft drink and the fun of driving an expensive car and lying on the beach.

But it's just not true. Challenging and testing your mind and body, even to the point of exhaustion, failure, and breakdown, can feel as wonderful as anything else life has to offer. I suppose the enjoyment of hard work is more of an acquired taste than the taste for pleasure and fun, but once you've acquired it, you're blessed with more ways to feel good, and life is better. Harder and better."

My Goal

So I started small- there was no way I could immediately set the goal to do a marathon but I wanted this- I wanted a challenge for my body and my mind. I didn't know that it would test both so much. Just a whimpy 5k!!! But it wasn't just a 5k for me.

I noticed I was able to head out the door, knowing that I was working towards this 5 k, whereas if I was just running to "work-out" I know I wouldn't have been able to push myself out the door (especially at night after a long days worth of work).
But the fact of the matter is, I have no confidence in myself for running- 13 minute mile, give me a break!!! I couldn't run for 10 minutes? Seriously though, I didn't think of my goal as a race, just something that I wanted to see myself do.

Training

First day:
8 minutes walking, 2 minutes running- my lungs were on fire!

After that first day, it got better and better- to the point where I was consistantly doing 6 minutes running, 4 minutes walking.
That felt good- I pushed and felt like I was working and finally made it to about 3 miles in 45/50 minutes. But it wasn't about the time for me, I was doing the distance and it felt good.

Then after I had about a month or so of my training, I talked Jay into coming with me, silently gleeful about him being impressed about how in shape I was getting and that I could run ahead and come back for him panting-(He drives a truck all day long, I knew he couldn't be in that great of shape).

Jay's Pace

We laced up our tennis shoes and my heart sunk after the first few strides- he was ahead of me, no way I was going to keep up that pace. But I just knew that after 10 minutes or so of him running at that pace that he would get tired.
Nope.
I was chasing him!!! How could this be?!!! I was so angry, not that he was able to do that but that pretty much everything I had been working for for a month or so and felt so insignificant.

I got over that though and started training harder, trying to run faster, longer strides instead of my short bounce strides. My knee hurt, my hip hurt and my foot hurt all on one side of the body doing that. I just was not used to letting more than just my legs propel me forward- I had to use more of my body to do those long strides. Once and a while I ending up almost losing dinner, thinking I should have waited more than just 1/2 hour before running with Jay, to almost fainting and even to tears, fighting an inner battle that I just couldn't do it-thinking back to high school and how I just couldn't do it. Those thoughts are so powerful to the point where physically I just would literally feel like there was no hope.

The 5k came just in time I think. I was still doing 6 minutes running(long Jay strides) to walking 4 minutes to recover. I felt good about that and I knew as long as I completed the 5k I would feel good.

The Day Of

Well, that morning we got there and there were a ton of people, at least 50 of us. Looking around at all their faces and gear, knowing that these people were in shape and this was a race, I all of a sudden got scared. I was scared because I had told my neighbors I was training for this 5k and they were there! What if they laughed at me because I was super slow?

I frantically scanned the crowd for someone I knew I could beat, no matter what and there he was. Old, not really frail looking but definitely up there in his 50's, 60's with a nice big pot belly. Now, as long as I finished before him, I knew I would feel like I at least accomplished something. (The plan being my run 6, walk 4 deal).

I was so nervous about this, it was a race after all! My personal best being 45 minutes for about 3.2 miles which I felt was really good for me, but seeing these people, I knew I would probably have to push a little harder- maybe run 6, walk 3? That might be better!

With my heart pounding, but so ready, the race began. It was great seeing all the bobbing heads, knowing that other people do this and we were all doing it together today. I glanced at my watch and those 6 minutes went by way too fast, maybe I could at least run till the first mile marker- why wasn't anyone taking a break and walking? Didn't anyone lose their breath like I did? This is so embarrassing!!! What if I'm last? Oh well, I can't breath, so I took a walk break.


I made my walk breaks shorter though- I cut it down to 1 minute. That seemed to work fine until the 2nd mile marker. My breath would turn short and frantic and I would have to concentrate on making it slow and even and controlled. I took a little longer walk break, maybe 2 minutes and I could hear breathing behind me- coming up, closing in the distance. I reminded myself again that this was a challenge for me and it wasn't about beating anyone. So I concentrated on getting my break that I so desperately felt I needed when no other than- it couldn't be....

The old man.

The Last Stretch

WHAT?!!! How, no, this can't be- Okay I'm done with my break now. I pushed past him quite easily at a faster pace but could only keep it up for a little while. I couldn't run my full 6 minutes anymore so I was taking 15- 30 second recovery breaks just to get my breathing under control. And there was that breathing behind me again-no way!! How does he keep going? He's fat and old! I am young and I've been training! It's not fair. I just have to let him go in front of me- I shouldn't have singled him out- it's fine, next time I'll do better.

No, if I let him go, I know I will walk the rest of the way, feeling defeated.
So what did I do?

I pushed myself even harder than I thought was possible. Passing him, making sure I was a little ahead of him, knowing that I would have to walk a little to recover, knowing he would probably pass me, only for me to push again in front of him. No way am I letting him beat me! The goal was in sight and I could hear him breathing again- no way!!! But there was the finish line, just a couple hundred feet away.


Well, I must tell you my time was more than I ever hoped for that day because of that old man pushing me. My time was 34 minutes, 40 seconds. 34.40. Doesn't sound half bad does it? And I bet you are wondering if I beat that old man. Does it matter?



But yes.

Yes I did.

Nannying

Can I just start by giving all the mothers out there a round of applause?!!!

I've been super busy for I have become a summer nanny. I love my physical therapy job but I wasn't getting very many hours so this was the solution. And it worked out because I can still work a little bit at Mountain Land and a little bit nanny because the parents have joint custody of the kids so it's every other week.

Let me tell you one thing: it is hard work. Holy Guacamole. This is mother training at 100% saturation. I won't bore you with the routine I've established or the chores I have them do...except for Jay's clever idea to call some of the chores "Ninja Missions". I used this to have them earn computer time. They looked at me kind of crazy but it got them to laugh and not groan about "chores" cause it sounded cool to do a ninja mission. Anyway, let me introduce you to:

Caleb- 14 years old. Likes playing on the computer a lot. He also enjoys a good book. Oh yah, and I bought some water balloons for them and he set up a booby trap which I stepped into and got soaking wet. Learned my lesson there.

Katie- 12 years. She is very much grown-up and wears make-up. She loves Justin Beiber too so we have fun blasting his music and having dance parties.

Abby- 10 years. Abby is the sweetest girl with down syndrome you will ever meet with bouts of stubbornness. She is like a 3 year old, with the added strength of an ox who also has a hard time speaking. She will mumble the words and make clicking sounds and such ending the sentence with, "Okay?!!!?"
The first few days I said "Okay" right back, ending up with her doing outrageous things like coloring on the wall and running into the street. I have learned to not agree with anything she says. I am learning some sign and doing better at interpreting what she is trying to communicate.

I have had some adventures with these kids and it has been really exhausting but fun so far. I cannot believe how hard it could really be to get kids active- it's so much easier to let them play computer or watch movies all day.

I'm sure there will be great stories to come...

Check it out!

You know that feeling that you finally got something that you always wanted?

You know, like a little kid on Christmas: that feeling of excitement and anticipation
that has built up for the past months as you waited to get your hands on that
one thing you have been dreaming about.

You want to jump and cry and leap and shout, "I FINALLY HAVE IT!!!"

I am a little kid on Christmas right now.

I bought my camera!

Bibbity Bobbity Boo

What do you do when summer hits and you're not in school?

Sit around, lay by the pool, read some books, go on trips! Well, that is usually what my summers look like but this summer I am going to work!
A lot.
I got a nanny job and I'm still going to work a little bit with Physical Therapy. Now for my down time, which I'm going to have so much of, I want to start learning how to refinish furniture.

I am going to record my projects from the summer. I have a lot I wish to accomplish and a lot to learn! I am so excited. If you are interested in following, the URL is tatteredcharm.blogspot.com (Cute name huh?)
Hopefully I can turn the tattered into charm...guess we'll find out.

I've collected a free bookshelf which needs some love, and I hopefully will have a vanity by tomorrow...cross your fingers for me...

Now I just need my magic wand- which will most likely take the form of a combination of: sander, primer and lots and lots of paint.

Crushed Headlight

I was furious when I got off from a long days work and discovered someone had run into my car, shattering the passenger headlight.

I thought, "Just because my car is in bad shape and old doesn't mean someone can just come and hit my car and it's fine! What the nerve! Obviously if I drive this piece of junk it means I can't afford a spiffy car- really?!!!"

I stood up to discard the shattered glass that had sprayed all over the asphalt and did a double take to my windshield. My anger fled and was replaced with shock to find a note there.

"I am so sorry I hit your car" with a listed name and number.

Relief and gratitude were my first two emotions and I called the girl up to arrange getting the light fixed. I profusely thanked her for her honesty. Her husband actually works as mechanic so I was able to bring the car to his shop to get it fixed up.

I was again impressed when he not only replaced the broken headlight, but took a little extra time to replace my grill, which had been broken previously, and my bumper, which had been holding on by a thread, and tighten the battery so it wouldn't jiggle around and become unhooked. He spent three hours fixing all of this stuff and apologized for his wife hitting the car.

Why was I so surprised that someone in the world is honest and goes above and beyond the call of duty? I am so so grateful and blessed and now know from experience that yes, there are still good people out in the world.

Cassy's Senior Picture Fiasco

I have always wanted to be a photographer.

Yes it has been my dream for quite some time now.

Yet my photography class was an utter disaster except for one picture of a swing from above which I risked my life to get by climbing up above the swing, teetering with one hand pointing and shooting and the other holding on for dear life at the top of the swing set.

I didn't even aim right- I just snapped the photo and climbed down, luckily unscathed.

My teacher thought it was the best picture ever and requested a copy for him to keep...looking back he probably used it and sold it!!! ah the nerve....ah well...

Anyway, so my mother wanted me to take my sister's senior pictures. First of all I am in the process of getting a camera (I put my couch up for sale on KSL- Jay offhandedly said that if I wanted to sale our couch to pay for my camera I could. Little did he know I would actually do it...the very next day.) So I borrowed my uncles Canon, which is a decent camera- I really do love it, but we only had 1/2 hour of daylight left.

We frantically tried to find cool places to photograph my sista's beauty, and get her changed in as many outfits as possible.
Most of the pictures turned out blurry but there were a few good ones-

She's so beautiful! Love ya Cass!

Want

Jay and I want to buy a house.
Like really really badly.

I mostly want it so I can have this:


I've had to learn to be patient.
Waiting is so hard!

Chicken

After returning late from class last night, the last thing I expected to be perched next to our front door was a chicken.
Yet, there he was. What the heck was it doing there?

And it left a nice little souvenir on the doorbell.
Couldn't it at least faced the other way?!
Gross.

Coloring Conference

I usually take notes, but I always get hung up if I missed something and I never look at them really again.

This idea was presented to the primary children to help them pay attention in conference: make a collage of key points you hear spoken. I decided to give it a try because I was in the coloring mood.



Best idea ever! I look at this poster and can think back on exactly what it was about those talks that I loved and touched me. And now we have this poster hanging on our fridge so we can look at it for a while and remember those beautiful words and the spirit with which they were spoken.

I also can't wait for conference to be printed so I can read all of these talks again!!!

Being Mischievous

April Fools Day oh glory glory!!!
The day that gives you a free pass to do something totally hilarious that could also be a little mean- but it's not mean because it's allowed on this blessed day.

We bought donuts
Took the filling out with straws
And filled them back up with...



I topped them with a bit of jam...



Aren't they deceiving? I put jam on top to make it look fruity and delicious.
I was so excited to get my brother-in-law, I was laughing hysterically just imagining his face when he thinks it's a jelly filled donut and ends up taking a big bite of ketchup!!! Jay warned me to play it cool or it wouldn't work.

So we invited Garrett over to play some Halo and I mentioned nonchalantly that there were some left over donuts from someone at work and that we had already eaten our fill. I held my breath as he walked by and said he would have some later. How was I supposed to do this! I was dying!!!

I left them on the table and waited patiently for him to walk over to get some- usually he will eat any kind of treat we offer him-so I thought he must know what was up.

Hoping to speed up the process I mentioned them again- of course discretely, "Jay we should just split one, these donuts are calling my name, but I've had so much I really shouldn't"...

Finally Garrett walks over and it takes all that I have not to just start laughing and not to watch too closely for his reaction. But he takes small bites. Darn, he knows!!! But he takes another bite and makes a weird face- then tastes the top part which of course is the yummy jam, then tries the other part again and makes another weird face. He realizes that it's ketchup and Jay and I bust up laughing!!!

Success! Totally got him!

Then for the other donut, we decided to leave it upstairs for my mother or father-in-law, but I knew that Nancy probably wouldn't eat it so we were hoping that Garr would.

I didn't get to see this one but apparently Garr thought that it was an april fool's joke from Garrett but Garrett reassured him it was from me and Jay. I suppose he was still distrusting Garrett (earlier that day he taped the sprayer on the sink) so he split the donut in half and ketchup fell out everywhere on the countertop.

I was not aware of the fact that Garr is color blind when this happened, but apparently the red of the ketchup looked like chocolate so he hurriedly took a huge bite to catch the "chocolate" before it fell all over the place.

That worked a lot better than I planned on.

I guess he ate a bowl of ice-cream to recover.

Next year, I think I'll tone it down a little bit and not get so carried away....

I'm naming my car M-Star, short for monster...

On our way back from Provo, the speedometer dropped to zero while we were on the freeway-
that's not good.

We pulled off to main street in Lehi, both looking at each other like, "Are we going to make it home?" We started losing juice big time- Jay had the pedal to the medal and we were going 5 mph!!! We had to pull off and take a look at the ol' engine.

Jay called up his brother, a mechanic, and he gave us a could-be diagnosis that the alternator was bad. (What in the heck is an alternator?...) The battery was completely drained- apparently the alternator is what helps keep the battery powered to power the whole car.

My dad came on down and gave our battery a jump so we could make it to Checker's. It was like taking our car to the doctor's. The worker had a cool stethoscope computer thingy-ma-jig and he attached it to the car somewhere and it told us that the alternator was in fact the problem.
Bought a new alternator.

To get back to my parent's place was a story in and of itself but I will just give you the main gist of it: We had to stop every two miles to charge the battery up to give it enough power to make it two more miles. Oh ya, and can I throw in the word "construction". You probably are imagining now a scenario very similar to the one we were in.

Made it to parent's place.
Started to rain.
Jay went to put the new alternator in the car in the rain.
Didn't have the right tools.
Went to neighbor's house.
Neighbor had tools.
Sun went down, it's dark now and wet.
Then neighbors Chance and Matt- coolest neighbors ever-
came and helped Jay in the rain and in the dark fix the car.

What great neighbors!!!

Made it back to go to work on Monday.

Learned a lot. Grateful.

Phew.

Festival of Colors

We were able to make it to the Holi, or Festival of Colors and it was so cool. Colors were flying everywhere in celebration of spring!!!



Surprise!!! Colors flying right in the FACE!!!



Bethany had way too much fun, she was getting everybody.





From head....



to.....


We were covered with colorful powder!!!

The coolest part was when they yell out "Hare Krishna!!!" Hare means energy and Krishna means beautiful/godlike. So when "Hare Krishna" is yelled, everyone throws their colors in the air at the same time and the color powder flies everywhere and looks absolutely awesome.

Forget You

I don't watch this show, but I looooove the music from it!
I have become obsessed with this song ever since I found it on youtube. I am pretty sure I have listened to it at least once a day for a month now.

The other day on the way to class Jay said he heard it on the radio and we started singing it and I decided we should see if the song was on and...it was on! And not only that, but the song was in the EXACT spot we were singing. It was truly a magical moment.

This is Glee's version of "Forget You" with Gwyneth Paltrow singing and it's amazing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1_B9FCZJMA

I can't NOT dance when I hear the song.

One Year Baby!

This last weekend was our first anniversary!

We made reservations for The Roof and got all shnazzed up and had a wonderful expensive meal.



I borrowed my cousin's huge beautiful prom dress and Jay wore a matching tie. What was funny was there was a high school prom going on so we totally blended in. Everyone thought we were in high school too. I chatted with some of the girls and complimented their beautiful dresses and they oooed and awed at mine (well Quincie's dress). It was funny to see surprised faces when I told them I was not at prom but that we were celebrating our first wedding anniversary.

I believe this will have to be a tradition, I had a blast getting all dolled up and wearing a huge gown. LOVED IT!




This year has been extraordinary.
Jay and I have learned a lot more than we every planned on learning in our first year of marriage. There have been some unexpected things and some heartbreak but hey we know we aren't perfect and that life is not perfect. We are discovering ways to communicate with each other and build a strong foundation for the rest of our lives. I believe in marriage so much and I know it is making both of us better people.

I'm so lucky to have met Jay. He is an amazing human being and I love him with all my heart and can't believe how much my love has grown over the year. I look back on our wedding day and go, "Wow, I can't believe I love you more than I did that day."
I know every year I will probably look back and say, "I thought that was love?" because I know every year our love will deepen and become more meaningful.

And I know life will bring some craziness and stress and bills and whatever else but all I gotta say is I know we are in it together for the long haul so life,

Bring
It
On!!!

Surprising V-Day

Sweet does not always equal romance. Jay doesn't find value in buying me flowers when they just die a few days later. I look back and laugh that every time we went to a grocery store or stopped by anywhere where there were bouquets of flowers, I would stop and smell them, and Jay would just keep walking- didn't even notice me smelling them. I purposely would stand there longer than necessary and just sniff the flowers- like "hey, look, I'm smelling the flowers- they are so pretty- you should buy me some". It never worked. And the last thing a girl wants to do is say, "Hey, you should buy me some flowers dude." That would be romantic...

So Valentines Day comes along and I didn't really expect anything- and guess what Jay did? He totally surprised me. He told me to read some good Valentine's Day articles in the paper and opened it up to a page where I saw my name and a funny little poem to me about how our cars are junk but he has everything he wants because he has me. It was so Dorky! I loved it!

Then there on the kitchen table was a single red rose. Beautiful beautiful rose and a CD. He said he got me a flower because he knows I like flowers and got me a CD with the money he would have spent on a bouquet. And the CD was Rascal Flatts- my favorite!

And then- I know- there's more? Yes! Then he surprised me further by leaving me a little scavenger hunt around the house- you should have seen me- I was running to each of the places like a little kid on Christmas- so excited to see what was in each spot. Each spot had a piece of a puzzle piece with a pile of candy. When I put the puzzle together it said, "Jay and Aubrey Forever".

Sweetest thing ever.

ZUMBA

Where have you been all my life?

I have heard of it and seen it on the infomercials.
It looked fun.
It sounded fun.

Folks, when you do it,it's better than anything you have heard or seen. You are completely taken in. All of a sudden, all of your cares and worries go away and you are just moving to the music. You sweat like crazy, and probably look like a lunatic, but nobody cares. You just go for it and enjoy what you can do and man it FEELS GOOD!!!

It's like a huge smile for your entire body.
And as you keep going, that smile turns into a laugh.
Your body is laughing and your life is changed forever.

Ahhh, I love laughing.

Bread Maker

Now that I am all domestic and married and stuff, I constantly surprise myself when I get excited over things like...well...my bread maker.

I got this gift for Christmas from my dear, sweet, amazing, wonderful, handsome, thrifty husband. (He was reading over my shoulder, just had to throw all that good stuff in).

I was so excited to just throw ingredients in there and let it do it's thing. Then, Nancy explained some things to me: like how the order is important and level everything off PERFECTLY and don't let the yeast touch the salt or the liquid, etc. More work than I expected, but fairly simple still.

Today I tried out my first recipe: Honey Banana Whole Wheat Bread. So I did perfect measurements for everything (except I added like a drop or two of almond extract- I am in love with this stuff) and turned on the machine to the appropriate settings.

I waited and waited. NOTHING was happening.

Then after FOREVER, it finally made it's first turn and I could finally burst out and say that IT WORKS!!!

And the bread was yummy, especially with a peanut butter sandwhich! Yum.

Cauliflower Pizza

I know, that's what I thought! Gross, right?

This recipe substitutes cauliflower instead of the dough you would normally use for the crust.
I was feeling a little adventurous(or crazy) and decided to try something a little out of the ordinary for dinner tonight. I wanted pizza but I wanted something healthy too.

So I went ahead and did a little variation to a recipe I found for cauliflower pizza and figured that if you wanted to cut your calories in half while still getting a little pizza flavor, you could try it too.

INGREDIENTS
2 cups cauliflower, grated
1 cup light mozzarella cheese
2 eggs
pepperoni (I added this to make my pizza more authentic)

basil
oregano
parsley
fennel
garlic powder to taste

green and red pepper
1/2 cup onion
1 8 oz can tomato sauce (seasoned with Italian seasoning)

DIRECTIONS:
While cauliflower is steaming start chopping. Chop pepper, onion and tomato. Set aside. Let cauliflower cool down, then grate it up.

*The whole time I was thinking, "This cauliflower smells! I hate cauliflower, man this is going to totally taste like cow dung".

Combine grated cauliflower with 3/4 cup mozzarella cheese and eggs in a large bowl. Spray a regular cookie sheet with cooking spray before spreading the dough evenly. Sprinkle dough with fennel, oregano, parsley and basil. Add garlic powder.

Bake at 450 degrees F for 12-15 minutes. Remove the dough from the oven and spread tomato sauce across dough. Then sprinkle chopped pepper, onion as well as the pepperoni and remaining cheese on top. Return pizza to oven . Broil and leave in until cheese has melted and the crust is crispy (3-5 minutes).

REVIEWS:
Mind you it is different than pizza. If Jay were more of a tomato fan I would have skipped the sauce(it makes the crust a little too moist on top) and just put fresh sliced tomatoes on top.

Jay thought it was fine, not amazing. 3 stars. He will eat it once in a while.

Aubrey was surprised because I expected it to be disgusting honestly. It ended up reminding me of a pizza flavored omelet a little bit. I was very happy with the end result in the fact that it satisfied my craving for pizza but was healthy!

I am excited to try different variations and maybe add a little more to the dough to make it stick together a little better. We will see where the chef inside me takes us...

Why do bad cars happen to good people?

This question has crossed my mind more than a few times these past couple of weeks.

However, if my car had not broken down I would never have known about all the people who would lend a hand and help me out when I needed it.

The day after my car broke down I was supposed to start working at a new physical therapy clinic and I told my new boss, Kim, my situation and she offered to pick me up and drop me off. Ya, my boss did that.
Then, at this new workplace during lunch I didn't remember to bring a lunch so the receptionist insisted I take her car somewhere so I could grab something. I didn't even ask and I wasn't making a big deal about not eating- she just offered.

Then everyone was always like, "You don't have a car, let me get you some lunch!"

I don't know, I saw a lot of good in a lot of people, and it made me humble and accept help getting around. I had to and it's good for me.