Transitions

"Summer" is coming to an end.  Not the actual equinox, but that lovely transition of no school to going back to school!  Today was the last day of non-routine for the year.  Tomorrow my sweet and crazy kiddos start school!  Tessa will be in fourth grade and I can't believe how old she is getting!  She is so responsible and kind.  She is always ready to step in and help me any way she can.  She is on top of any situation she is in and is aware of what is going on around her.  She keeps me in line when it comes to organizing and keeping things clean and tidy.  She is a fabulous reader and loves to read at her own will.  We started reading Anne of Green Gables a couple of days ago together and I am loving and look forward to the time of reading with her every night!  She is growing into a wonderful and kind young lady and I couldn't be happier with who she is becoming!

Hudson is starting second grade!  He is excited for recess, friends, school lunch and math.  Tomorrow in not only his first day of a new grade, but its also his birthday!  My almost seven year old.  I think back to this day seven years ago when I started going into labor with him and how much life has changed since then.  It was so much more simpler then.  Life is good now and I hope that Mr. Hudson really does well this year, especially socially.  I pray that he finds some good friends this year.  He is still extremely challenging, but I am more and more hopeful that he is going to great things in this life.  He has such a kind and tender heart and he can be quite witty at times!  Lately, he LOVES taking things apart and loves batteries.  He loves taking batteries in and out of toys.  For his birthday Adrienne and Lowell gave him a remote control car and a big pack of batteries and he was just excited about the batteries as he was about the car!

Felicity is going into Kindergarten.  I can hardly believe she is old enough to go to school.  She is still such a little squirt to me!  But I am so excited for her and am really happy that I still get half the day with her at home before she has to go to school all day.  She is nervous to go tomorrow, but I know she is going to love it!  Earlier today I was listening to the soundtrack from the movie, The Help and she came into the kitchen to where I was.  She looked like she was about to cry.  I asked her what was wrong and she told me that the song was making her sad.  I asked her why it was making her sad and she said that it made her think about someone dying.  It was so sweet and she was so honest and vulnerable about how she felt.  I think this experience really shows who she is.  She is so aware of whats going on around her and picks up on the smallest details.  She is so sweet and tender and wants  everyone to be happy.  Lately in her prayers at night, she has been praying for me and thanking Heavenly Father for how hard I work.  It means the world to me that she said that and she thinks of it all on her own which makes me overjoyed!  I am so thankful for her in my life.  I learn a lot from that little girl:)

And let's not forget my sweet little Thatcher.  Although he isn't going to school, I can't believe that he isn't little babe anymore.  He is my big one year old!  I can't believe that I won't ever be doing the baby thing anymore.  Part of me is sad that I won't experience any of wonderful baby moments, but most of me is thankful and excited for the new phase of life that I'm coming into to.  I am so thankful and blessed for the four children God has blessed me with.  Mr. Thatcher is so fun these days.  He is standing on his own and has taken three and four steps!  The words he is saying (in order) are: Uh-oh, this, that, and thank you.  Yes, he says thank you.  Today, he said it so clearly, it was shocking that something so little could say it so well!  He still loves his snuggy and really only wants his binky when he goes to bed.  He still takes way too short of naps, but he loves when I read to him; which none of my other kids were interested in books until much older than he is.  I am so excited to spend more one on one time with him when the kids are in school and I love that he is mine!!!  And those brown eyes are killer and I'm sure he'll get away with a lot with those deep dark delicious chocolate colored orbs looking at me!

I am off to bed. Ready for a fresh new day.  Ready for kids to have balance and for me as well.  Its going to be a great day and I'm excited for Hudson's birthday too.  I am so blessed and thankful for the life Heavenly Father has blessed me with.  He is gracious and so merciful and I thank Him daily for the bounty I have.

February, March, April, and now it's May?

Sister Celebration is almost here!!!  And I couldn't be more happy about it!  My sister, mom and all her sisters are going to a vacation home in Lake Tahoe this week!  I will be gone for five days and I'm only taking Thatcher.  I could not be more thrilled for the break and the chance to renew and learn a little more about who just Nicole is, and not just me as "mom".  It will be so nice to be with my family.  We all bring our sewing machines and spend the whole time crafting and creating!  I can't wait to work on some long awaited projects and get into a good sewing groove.  

I ran 12 miles yesterday, which was a huge deal for me!  I haven't ran that distance in a few years and it really felt so good.  I ran with a friend through some beautiful roads.  I think the thing I enjoy most about running, besides how good I feel after, is being able to appreciate the beauty around me, in slow motion.  When I drive, I can't get the same experience, so it's so nice to run!  My half marathon is on the 21st of this month, so I'm getting excited for it!  

Hudson and Tessa are doing soccer for the first time this spring and they are both hooked!  I asked Tessa if she wanted to do dance or soccer and she said soccer!  It's so fun watching them grow and learn and discover what they are each interested in and learn more about their personalities!  And I got the opportunity to sing in church last Sunday and it was a wonderful experience!  I was a part of a choir my senior year in high school that traveled to many different church houses to do concerts and events.  And singing last Sunday reminded me of those days.  After I sat down from singing, my mom leans over to me and said that she felt daddy and my brother said that he felt him as well!  It was truly a wonderful experience!  I love feeling him close by.

Okay, so I love so many things about Logan and living in Cache Valley.  But after this winter and dealing with the snow, I have decided that I REALLY dislike the snow and winter!  I tried really hard to have a good attitude, but I am over it!  I swear I am going to move somewhere else during the winter…I am so wimpy!  With that said, I am overjoyed for spring time and planting and growing things!  I am in full force with gardening and landscaping our yard.  We bought an apple tree and hope to buy another one soon.  We are going to be getting raspberries soon too.  And I planted white and red grapes yesterday.  I have started our vegetable garden and have built four garden boxes!  I am in heaven growing things and can't wait to do more!  I want to eventually get rid of most of our grass and grow food instead and have areas to relax and be with family as well.  Like a fire pit and outdoor table for meals.  I just love being outside!

I just remembered something fun we did last month!  We took a trip to California! It was so nice to see family and friends and the OCEAN!!!  I miss the ocean so much, so it was heavenly going back!  I really miss California, but I know we are supposed to be here:)  It was a lovely visit.

Funny church story that happened today:  So my duty at church right now is over the kids ages 3-11 years old.  There are about 70 kids.  There is a president and two councilors and I am one of the councilors.  We rotate every Sunday with conducting the meeting, teaching, and just overseeing and helping with whatever the needs are.  Well, I went to church today thinking that it was my week to conduct, but after to talking to the councilor (as the meeting was about to start) I quickly realized that I had been looking at the wrong date on the schedule and that it was really my week to teach!!  Needless to say I didn't have anything prepared to teach!  Panic!!!!  Thankfully, we are given a yearly outline broken down weekly for the lessons, so I said a quick prayer asking God to guide me to know what to say to the kids and I quickly read the lesson and ten minutes later, I was teaching!  It was a crazy experience, but it was also really neat because I really felt like God answered my prayer immediately and I was blessed to know what to say!  I was grateful for the experience and can't believe I messed up like that! I'm such a silly billy….

dayz

There is so much going in my life and yet I can't really tell you what the main points are.  There are so many little tasks to do each day and yet I want to just get those things done and move on to things I want/love to do.  Finding balance right now feels like an insurmountable task to accomplish.  I feel overwhelmed with all of my responsibilities.  I want to not only be a great mother, wife, homemaker, finance guru, teacher, friend, etc, but I also want to BE Nicole.  Just Nicole, sometimes.  Who is she? Without all of the other titles and the things that comes with those titles.  I want to be strong in her to.  I feel that is imperative for me to be her, so that I CAN be balanced and strong in all of my other roles.  So many things/little people tugging on me constantly.  There is too much "perfection" in the world.  What the world portrays as "real".  Pinterest, social media, magazines, tv, and so many other endless things that are really just ceveats to stay away from.  I want my inner self to be content with my body, my living space and what I do and how I flow from moment to moment.  I want to be at peace no matter the storms that may be around me.  I want to be joyful and happy so that my kids can emulate those positive attributes.  Answers I've been getting from prayers are: stop wanting so many things and be content with what you have.  Be less critical of your kids and just love them unconditionally. At one point, I was praying what I could do to help our family financially, what I could do to bring in some income…and the answer I got was nothing; that I wasn't supposed to do that right now, that my job was to just be a mom and work on those important things inside the home.  I admit I was a little frustrated by this answer, but I know that Heavenly Father sees the bigger picture and knows me and my littles better than I do.  I need to trust the answers that He has given me and be okay with that.  So for now, I will continue to push forward, searching for ways to be ME, and to do the best what the stewardship the Lord has blessed me with.

My favorite saying these days that grounds me….I believe it is an apache prayer…

May the sun bring you new energy by day.

May the moon softly restore you by night.

May the rain wash away your worries.

May you walk gently through the world and know

it's beauty all the days of your life.

Cali to Utah...

These photos of our first few months after we moved to Utah.  This snow photo is one of the first real times the kids got to play in the snow and oh were they SO happy and excited!

This little cutie loved playing with her baby dolls!  She is all happiness and delight.  

We have been in Utah for two and a half years now and I can't believe how fast time goes by.  All of my kiddos and especially Felicity have grown so much since then!  There was so much uncertainty during those first few months while we were living with my mom.  Jay had a job, but not a great one, we didn't know where we were going to live and life seemed so unsure in some ways.  In other ways, it was nice to be near my mom and my brother came home from his mission while we were living there which was so fun for me since I hadn't lived with him since he was ten years old! 

 Between then and now, so much has changed and we have been blessed beyond what I ever could have imagined!  We are now home owners to the best home ever, our kids can walk to and from school and play in the front yard and neighborhood for that matter without worry, they are involved in things like choir and soccer and dance (which have been near impossible in California where things are so much more expensive), we don't live anywhere near a freeway and there are mountains five minutes from our home.  We have family all around and we have a great ward too.  I feel the Lord pouring out His blessings upon our family daily and thank Him for the plan He has for my sweet family.

Thatcher 6 months new

Well, there you have it folks!  He keeps on growing and I keep telling him to stop and stay tiny!

6 month stats:

16 lbs.

40% weight

80% height

93% head

July 2013 Felicity turns 2!

 In the mist of packing and getting ready to uproot our lives from California and make the big change to move to Utah, we were able to have a fun evening to celebrate Felicity turning two!  We had grama and papa Hoxie over and Aunt Amanda!  I remember enjoying spending time as a family and making some of our final memories in our Canterbury home.  Felicity had fun opening presents and getting excited for her special day.  We will cherish our Hoxie family memories and living so close to them!

 I never get sick of looking at Felicity's sweet smile with all those curls around her face!

Today: Happy Valentine's Day!  It is also the Sabbath Day and I did sharing time for primary today.  My lesson went really well, which always makes me happy.  I even had the kids play with play dough and it went great!  I am excited to have our traditional surprise Valentine dinner as a family tonight.  I bought succulents for each of the kids for them to take care of and put them in their rooms and I think they are going to love them!  Side note: I have pink streaks in my hair and I LOVE it!  Happy in pink and festive for the day!  Hudson was so sweet and gave each person in the family a colored picture and a bag of Chex Muddy Buddies.  He worked on them for a long time and was so thoughtful.  He also gave Felicity a CTR necklace and Tessa a special rock that someone gave to him.  I didn't know about those things and it was so cute that he was so thoughtful.  Most of the time he is not like that, so it's wonderful to see this side of him!  Today at church Hudson made me a Valentine and it said:

I love you mom.  Can we snuggle together?  You are SO warm.

Love Hudson

When we got home from church, I was sitting in the living room talking to my brother on the phone and Hudson came in, grabbed a blanket and snuggled up on my lap.  It was heaven.  He stayed there for a good while and we watched the snow fall outside.  A short while later, we joined daddy and Felicity in my bed.  Hudson snuggled up next to me and wanted to hold my hand.  A few minutes later, I had dosed off and realized that Hudson too had fallen asleep and we were still holding hands.  These are the moments I cherish.  When we are still and I see a more tender side of Hudson.  He is always go, go, go and it means even more to me when he is actually still.  It was a beautiful Valentine's gift from him.  Definitely a much needed tender mercy from the Lord.

Side note:  Jace pulled a double shift on Saturday and I prayed and pleaded with the Lord that I would have the strength to make it through the weekend without needing to rest, knowing that Jay would need the rest more than I.  It was a little daunting to think about Friday night, about the weekend, but I am feeling the Savior helping me and strengthening and I am feelin' good!  It strengthens my testimony that the Lord is aware of our every need and wants the best for us and listens to our prayers. 

Wyoming

All photos: July 2013
I have wonderful memories as a kid of visiting "The Ranch".  We had so much fun wondering around the cabin and playing with cousins.  The past couple of years going with my own kids, its been a whole lot of fun all over again!  And with 4-wheelers in the mix, we can cover more ground and see more beauty!

Right behind the cabin there is a great hill that we like to climb.  From the top you can get an amazing 3D view of the ranch and endless land and beautiful skyline.  One of the things I love riding on the 4-wheelers is riding over tons and tons of sage.  It smells lovely and is so beautiful!

 Amazing views with amazing people!  I always have the most fun when my sister and her family come!

 Parker place is one of the destinations we like to visit for an afternoon picnic.  The old homes are so neat and have so much history.

 These two are so fun together!  Cousin Amy is SO good with my kiddos and they just love her!

 Target practicing on the back hill.  Left to right. Jay, Hudson, Jonathan, Geoff, Tessa, William, Erin, and Amy.