Kara was placed back with her Mom on November 30th 2014. During that time she was still considered to be in the State's custody. They called it a trial home placement and it was scheduled to last for three months. If her Mom did all that was required of her, and if Kara did well then she would remain there permanently. During that time Dcfs had asked me to go to their house 2-3 times a week and help teach her Mom parenting skills and to help Kara with the transition. Since having my spiritual impression about this not being about me I have tried to completely put my own emotions aside and focus on being led by the spirit and being Christlike. I have grown to love and care for Kara's Mom even more and have tried to help her anyway I can. For the first few weeks I would just go to the house and then our families would get together on the weekend. In the middle of December we invited Kara's Mom, boyfriend, Kara and her baby sister over to our home for dinner. Jake and I prayerfully made the decision to allow them into our home. It wasn't easy. The professionals all advised us against it. Kara's Mom and boyfriend aren't always trustworthy so allowing them into our home was a little nerve wrecking. But we felt like it was the right thing to do at the time. I explained to Kara's mom that we will always consider Kara family and that means that we consider them family as well. The dinner went very well. Kara's Mom and boyfriend said it was one of the best meals they've ever eaten. The conversation flowed well. We made sugar cookies with the kids, went outside and saw the horses, the boys and Kara's mom's boyfriend rode the motorcycles around. They stayed for about 3 hours. Kara was so excited to come "home" after not being here for over two weeks. She excitedly showed her mom her room. "Kara's room, Kara's house, Kara's kitchen!" After that Sunday dinner Kara's mom offered to let us take Kara to some of our family Christmas parties. We ended up taking Kara to 3 Christmas parties the week before Christmas. We invited Kara's Mom and boyfriend to come with us to the big Weston family Christmas party at the church the Saturday after Christmas. The ended up deciding not to come saying that they were too tired. But they allowed Kara to come with us, they even brought her to our house!
I continued going up to their house twice a week. Kara's mom started asking me if I could just take Kara for a few hours instead of staying at the house during my visits. She was starting to see how much work it is taking care of two small children and looked forward to me giving her a reprieve. Eventually she started asking me to keep Kara for longer periods of time, occasionally overnight as well. The week that the home trial placement failed Kara's mom had asked me to keep Kara overnight after court on Monday. I brought her back to her Tuesday and was planning to come back on Thursday. Wednesday night I got a phone call from Kara's mom. She said that Kara had been crying for me all day and she asked me to come get her and keep her for the night. I immediately went and got her. I brought her back to her Mom late Thursday afternoon.
Friday, January 30th I got a phone call from the caseworker at about 4:45. She said that the home trial placement had failed and that she had Kara and was bringing her to me. She said that she needed to talk with both Jake and I when she got here. I was such a mix of emotions! I asked if Kara was ok and the caseworker assured me that she was. I hung up the phone and started balling! I quickly pulled it together, called Jake and told him what was going on, then started making arrangements for the boys. Ridge needed to go to a birthday party, Gunnar had basketball practice, and Dalton had his shooting test for hunter's safety. Thankfully we have awesome family and neighbors that stepped in to help get the boys everywhere they needed to go. The caseworker pulled in with Kara and I ran out to the jeep and helped get Kara out and just held her and snuggled her. She was so happy to be home! When Jake got home the caseworker explained why the home trial placement had failed and told us that the state was planning to go to trial and was asking for termination of her parents' parental rights. Before trial there would be a mediation where all the professionals would be there and basically talk with Kara's parents and see if they would be willing to relinquish rather than go all the way to trial. If they chose not to relinquish then Jake and I would be forced to take the stand and testify against them. It would be ugly and would ruin the great relationship we have built with them. It was also very uncertain which way the judge would rule. The caseworker explained that Kara's mom would be starting supervised visits at the office again that Tuesday and they would be held twice a week.
We began fervently praying that Kara's mom would do what was best for Kara and that she wouldn't take it all the way to trial and force us to testify. We prayed that what was best for Kara would happen. We fasted and went to the temple.
The pre-trial date was set for February 18th, with a mediation scheduled for February 13th, and the final trial date being set for February 23rd.
We went to mediation with a prayer in our hearts. Kara's Mom greeted me with a big hug like she usually does. She then sat with her therapist and had an intense conversation with her. The mediator invited Jake and I, Kara's mom, boyfriend, therapist, and boyfriend's friend to a conference room upstairs. The attorneys, caseworker, and guardian ad litem stayed downstairs in the lobby. Kara's dad had been transported in from the state prison and was in the courtroom with armed guards.
After about 45 minutes Kara's Mom had made her decision. She took me aside in the hall and told me that she had decided to sign over her parental rights and allow Jake and I to adopt Kara. She said that she knows in her heart that this is the right decision for Kara. She said that she feels that Jesus has helped her in making this decision. We hugged and cried for awhile. I told her how much I love and appreciate her and that I understand how hard this is for her. I told her that I will pray every day to raise Kara the way the Heavenly Father wants me to. She said that she had one request of me. She said that she wants Kara to do ballet. I said of course I would put her in ballet lessons.
The mediator told us that Kara's Dad had also chosen to sign over his parental rights as well. He said that he wanted to talk with Jake and I for a few minutes if that was ok with us. We said that it was and followed the mediator into the courtroom. As soon as I saw Kara's Dad I felt such compassion for him. He was in prison garb and his hands and ankles were cuffed and shackled. I wanted to shake his hand and let him know of our love and concern for him and to let him know that we don't judge him in anyway. When I realized that he couldn't shake my hand because he was handcuffed I squeezed his shoulder and asked how he was. The mediator reprimanded me and told me that I wasn't allowed to touch the prisoner. We sat across the table from him. He asked us what Kara's life would be like with us. He's been in and out of jail or prison most of the past 18 months and doesn't know us very well. We told him that we live in a great family oriented community. We told him that we have a lot of extended family that live close by and are a great support for us. We told him that Kara will go to wonderful schools. We told him how much we love Kara and will give her every opportunity in life she desires to have. He asked if we were LDS. I immediately said that we were. We were unsure of how his response would be to that. He said that he was glad and wanted her to be raised LDS.
Both Kara's parents signed a document stating that they were both going to voluntarily relinquish their parental rights at court on the 18th.
When we went to court the following Wednesday there was an issue with the prison transportation schedule and they were unable to transport Kara's dad until the following Monday, the 23rd. Kara's mom did still go ahead and permanently sign away her parental rights. It was very emotional. Even the judge got a little choked up.
On Monday February 23rd Kara's Dad signed his voluntary relinquishment agreement at court as well. We are now officially on the path to being able to adopt Kara! We will most likely be adopting her in August. She's been part of our family for the past eighteen months, we are so thrilled to finally be able to make it official!!! We recognize the Lord's hand in this and are so incredibly grateful for all the prayers and fasting on Kara's behalf.
