i guess the boyfriend was right. some things, we don't have to plan so far ahead.
i've been trying to spend more time at home, meet up with all my friends as much as i could also. i've always thought it'd be good to spend more time with them since i was gonna be moving to hk in the near future.
i guess nothing ever comes as planned. Boss was quite right when he said
-Change is the only constant-
i've heard it many times before. never has it been so applicable in my life. you'll never know whether things will work out. its still good to have a plan. but i guess a Plan B is just as important.
should spend some time alone thinking about that Plan B soon.
called the boyfriend in the evening. found that he was studying. so i said, oh then call me when u're heading home!" so he says "OK!"
so i've been waiting the whole night for him to call. 10pm. 11pm. 12am. 1am. i guess he's not calling tonight then. =/
sometimes i wanna get mad at him. then i realise i dont have a reason to because i'm not exactly the best of all girlfriends. i'm almost never there for him. i cant. i can only make him wait for me.
so what can i do. just suck it up and be understanding. as much as i can take.
I had lunch with two colleagues from my section yesterday and boy did they enlighten me. Well maybe I've been living in my own world all these time. I feel like I've just stepped out of the boundaries of my high-walled cubicle and entered reality.
In just one day. The impressions you had of a place could change. In just an hour. It could thwart your plans for the week. In just a single mutter. It could change your relationship with another.
I'm thinking what I saw and heard yesterday might only be the tip of the iceberg. Sigh, don't like the tension. Don't like the awkward silences. A lack of trust, communication and understanding. Too many assumptions. Too many differences. Too little time for explanations.
oh what to do..
Going to see my babies at the SPCA. It shall be a happy daaay :)
work has not been going well.
i still cant get things gg without a glitch. i spent loads of time staring at the screen trying to figure out why the cant work. error messages dont work anymore cuz its not coding problems but still a matter of concept problems. cant come up with better ideas for assignments. used to be able to do well in school cuz everything can be found on the internet or in the textbooks and now i'm just left with my brain. which i would say is almost equivalent to nothing compared to other ppl there.
its funny how huimin was trying to comfort me yesterday. i was telling her i still cant get the hang of things. And she went " its like that one! just a matter of getting used to it. Give yourself one month!"
VERY coincidentally.. yesterday marked one month already!! i told her and i think she got stumped for a moment. haha and she "huh-ed" me..lol. hilarious.
I'm so glad i got off work early yesterday to meet my friends. they make me very happy. =))
My boyfriend has the habit of saying " i-dont-know-i-dont-know" repeatedly right in the midst of me talking when i'm either saying something he doesnt agree with or when i'm talking about sthing he doesnt know for more than 5 minutes. i find that HIGHLY annoying cuz its like he doesnt wanna hear me speak and therefore he cuts me off with a train of "idontknows" right until i stop speaking. **** if you dont know, LISTEN. or at least pretend to??
some of his friends are slowly taking my place of accompanying him to places.. i used to go church with him and when i wasnt there he'd used to say he didnt wanna go church alone without me. Now he's got friends to go with him. And even when i'm there, he doesnt need me anymore.
i rmbr there was a time he asked me to go to IKEA with him. That was during the winter of 2007. Now he's got friends to accompany him there. =/
Its a bad feeling not to be able to be there for my boyfriend. Listening about him talk about the places he's been without me.. I wonder if we'll both be able to take not having each other in our own lives.. how long before it gets too long..
and to think i chose for all of this to happen. if it gets too long, it'll be my fault. so who am i to complain.
