Jan, the amount of rubbish that is said in this video is unbelievable. But nothing can beat what is said at the 6.31 minute. I still don't quite comprehend. There is a point where there is no audio... due to the intelligence of the camera person. I think we tried so hard to make Kimmy look like a fool that we ended up looking like fools as well. Then the battery dies.










Eri! You know how sometimes you claim I don't pay attention to what you are saying...well, looks like someone is more interested in taking photos! Cause clearly! I was listening intently. Photo quite funny.

It was Kimmy's birthday surprise picnic at Botanic Gardens, which I have to say is really nice. The usual happened. Surprise. Smiles. Cupcakes. Present. Photos. We hope you enjoyed it Kimmy! Now, it's time for some situational jokes. Most will not bother reading this and only few will appreciate.

Erika: Babe! Whats the sauce in this (sandwhich)?

Me: It's... butter...
_______________________________________________

Erika: Ya! If he want to come and go, I rather not have him.

Kim: Tell him to come... and go die...

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Kim: Yea there was a club there and the bouncer just let me in. I was 14.

Me: Maybe he thought you were a dwarf...

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Me: Oh man! I am soooo bitching!

Jannah: No you are not! You are just telling us a story.

Me: Yea a story.... with theories.

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Me: Yea, for most the first impression was "Plastics".

Jannah: YA! WHERE DO THEY GET OFF AH??!!

Me: YEA MAN! Where do they get off??!!... Orchard? Somerset??

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Me: Aiyo! Look at that small boy! So cute!

Jannah: YA!! He is digging in the bag for treasures/ treats!

Me: Ya! He is soooo cute!

Long pause...

Me: It's a girl la...

Yesterday was more eventful than we expected it to be.

Merry Christmas Everyone! I wish you peace and joy.

With lots of love,
Jules.

Oh Santa! Pretty please! Look at how pretty it is....
I've officially lost my writing juice. Juice??? See! Completely gone! I have several thoughts though.
Bubble Gum. Tulips. Hand cuffs. Clowns and Caramel Frappucino. Hmmmm...I'd kill for some Pecan Pie!
Oh! Facebook isn't all that fantastic. I do like how I can have a closet full of shoes though! I need to invite people so that I can get more closet space. You think Avi would be interested?

Have you ever noticed how the blue touches the white of the clouds? Or how the light hits the green of the leaves in the trees? But the way pink and orange stain the sunset,is a vision no one could paint.
Just a thought.
Happy Holidays!

I facebook-ed the rest. Yea....I did.

Beauty and the Beast is actually my favourite. But Eric is totally hot. Hate the name Eric though. So Gay. No offence, its just that he is not gay so it's a bit inappropriate. Personal opinion. Jannah! Remember we sang the entire song for Part of Your World, " Look at this stuff, isn't it neat. Wouldn't you think my collection's complete..."



Oh this one is the best! Haha Jan I know you will be singing to this one.

Boys Are...

Ignorant. Dense. Imbecilic. Misinformed. Moronic. Naive. Mindless. Shallow. Foolish. Dim. Futile.

That was fun! Before I begin, I would just like to say, Ren Ren I don't think of you this way okay! Haha. Oh and Hello!

The reason behind this post was the foolish behaviour of my friend's boyfriend. My friend who I will decline to mention and instead call her....Sophie, was going through a little problem. All she wanted to do was tell her, I'll be nice and say current love of her life, how she felt about this little tiff they had. The boy basically avoided the entire conversation which led to Sophie feeling like shit because of this built up anger.

Firstly, Boys, according to relationship savvy friends of mine, avoid topics which make them feel uncomfortable. Why? According to Me, because they are chickens who think about nothing but themselves and how they feel and run in the opposite direction when it comes to dealing with a females' emotions. Oh My G, to think we leave the safeguarding of our country in the hands of men who can't even handle a little bit of Estrogen. What more gunfire?

If you are not ready to hear what she has to say, tell her! I'll have you know that not all girls are sensitive and fragile. It's girls like that who give girls like Sophie and I a bad name. We can pretty much handle anything you throw at us. Like if you were banging another chick last night (a.k.a cheating on us) we'd actually want to know. In fact tell us if it was good or bad or how it could have been better. So we can ditch you and .....I shall not finish that sentence. Karma. Is. A. Bitch. Basically.

Girls are not mind readers. If you have something to say. Say it. You have a mouth, how about using it? Be honest. Thats all a girl asks for. The truth, even if it is going to hurt, is another thing they would like to have straight up. Gosh Jules. One more thing! Learn from Dan Humphrey of Gossip Girl. Keeping the fact that you still like the girl is not the way to go. How is she supposed to know if you don't tell her! The fear of being rejected is a lame ass excuse. What happened to chivalry? I guess its dead along with dinosaurs. I realise this post sounds very angst-y , but how many girls disagree? And the lack of sleep since Friday, ZoukOut was awesome, contributes to the attitude.

P.S: Yes Jannah. Always.

Being the dumbass that I am, I accidentally deleted some of the photos. So Vietnam is a really nice place. I just loved walking around, but it was soooooo damn noisy.90% of the entire nation travelled on Vespas. They would blow their horns to vent their anger. Which was practically every minute of every day. The driver who took us to the airport was traveling on this absolutely- no- traffic street, and he horned...twice. At what? No clue. Pedestrians do not have the right of way at zebra crossings, so cross at own risk. Nearly got knocked down actually, its amazing I sit here...blogging. I skipped out on a tour to study OB. My sister found that amusing and took that photo to rub it in my face. Shopping is not as good as Thailand of course. The cafes are way better than Starbucks or Coffee Bean. Their Christmas decorations are better than ours by a mile, or maybe 10. But I am glad to be back in the quiet hustle and bustle of our country.

It's December and I have no idea where the year went.

Back:) Hello Lovely Singapore. I've missed you so. Goodnight.

I am off to Vietnam tomorrow. My dad and a long story. Will be back in time for the mid semester tests of course. Let's see... what else happened this week? Oh Ally came back! And here I am leaving the country. Sorry Alison! Oh! Beks I wanted to show you the speech I did for my P.S class right but... I shy. You will get all teary eyed on me. And I think it would make Corinne very jealous. Sorry Gan, I was just thinking of Bekies' death for some reason. The two of you better keep the house safe! NO PARTIES UNDERSTAND! And that bottle of Mango Vodka better be there when I get back. Okay, XOXO to everyone else. Tara!

P.S: It is a yes on the breast feeding, with implants. Thanks Rach.

Romance is Dead.

I AM NOT AN ANTI-ROMANTIC! Of course every girl loves a little romance! It's just completely unexpected from a guy at this day and age. I mean proposing to a girl by saying "Eh wanna buy HDB flat together not?" is how they do it in this god forsaken country. So honestly you can't expect much. But, when a guy does go out of his way to impress a girl it is notably recognized. Because it is not common, you've won her heart instantly. But don't do it just cause "You'd like to tap that!". I think effort should become habit. That is pretty profound shit Jules. Not bad. *Snaps for self*. Don't you roll your eyes at me, my very human, Non-Plastic friends! Moving on! I realised, there are sooooooo many gorgeous, independent, intelligent girls out there but shit ass guys who think they are the bomb and who allow their egos to inflate until they become completely blinded. If you're wondering whether you are one of them, then you are probably guilty.

Anyway, I read Twilight, didn't like it. Yea the romance between the human and blood sucker, was sweet but predictable. So, not a fan. But thanks Kimmy for widening the number of books I've read. Harry is still number 1. The book got me thinking that fairy tales are designed to mock you. They get you young into believing that true love exists. They set little girls up into thinking that a handsome prince is going to come sweep her off her feet. Expectations lead to disappointment. Think about that the next time you feel like Cinderella. But okay, if you do find a guy who is hopelessly romantic then Yay for you! Just don't kiss and tell cause, he might not be yours much longer. Ooooh, is that a threat? You know how some blogs have mood settings? I think it is soooooo lame! Like, Mood: Happy :) . Like I care?? Or Mood: Sad :( , aaaww, am I supposed to comfort you? I mean shouldn't your post say it all? Okay personal opinion. I am entitled to one. I'll play along though.

Mood: Bitchy. Bye :)

OH OH OH! Would someone be so kind to tell me if you can breast feed after you get implants? No! I am not thinking of enhancing myself, just curious.

My Mother

Is the most annoying person on earth! Do you know what she said to me on thursday! I was wearing this off shoulder cropped top, with a white spaghetti and shorts. So I am rushing out the door right, and she is like

Most annoying person on earth: I don't like today's outfit. YOU LOOK LIKE A SLUT.

What the F right! She was just being...annoying. If you know my mom, She was being her lovable self. She then went on to say that the outfit looks like I am active. Active. Like I condone the possibility of contracting a sexually transmitted disease. Anything remotely suggestive, gets her going. Like she hates how I pair shorts with heels. Oh and! She says the most randomest things. Like when I get soooooo annoyed with her I would call her "Mother", and this is what she would say.

Most annoying person on earth: Don't get vulgar with me!

As in Mother F*cker. I just can't help but vent my anger in any other way. She would call and message me ALL THE DAMN TIME! Like seriously! We stay in the same house right, being family and all, and she is DOWNSTAIRS and she would message me " What are you having for dinner?"..... So after months of enduring this range of nonsense I said, Ma! I don't like seeing your name on my phone! Cause seeing your name blinking as you are calling, gets my blood boiling. Haha! So I can't remember after how long, I messaged her and asked what was for dinner. She didn't reply. Then I said I am on the way home. She still didn't reply. So I asked why aren't you replying my messages! And she said

Most annoying person on earth: You said you don't like seeing me on your phone what! So I don't reply la!

OMG right! Okay I know what you are thinking.I don't appreciate my mom and shit like that. But sometimes her actions are downright stupid. Like I was going to Sentosa once. And this is what she told me.

Most annoying person on earth: Julianna, be careful okay. Please don't talk to strangers. I Love You.

WHAT AM I????? 5????? And! She made it sound like I was never coming back! My father is no better.

Man married to the most annoying person on earth: Cut your hair! I don't want to get a heart attack when I see you walking around in the dark.

I had absolutely no response to that. I love them both. But sometimes...emancipation doesn't seem like a bad idea.
Oh..Its that time again, the scent of Christmas morning, just around the corner :) XOXO.

I Know What 'Em Girls Like.

I've gathered this information through critical thinking and experience from real life situations by observing my fellow kind. They have been thoroughly justified and basically what I am saying is... I am so right about this. What's with the formal language Jules?

1. Attention: Whether good or bad. Girls lap it up! It can be quite annoying.

2. Charm. They know they have it and they will use it to their advantage. And the thing is, they enjoy using it. Girls are manipulative. Caution.

3.Gossip. Bitching may not be for all of them, but gossiping... there is nothing us girls do better. You'd be surprised as to how much they know. I surprise myself sometimes, but I am all for finding out the truth.

4. Flirt. Some more than others. But deep down they all want to.

5. Boys. Apparently.... and for some unfortunately. So much so they will go through such lengths to keep them close. So if a particular friend of yours is treating you exceptionally well. Then be warned, cause she doesn't want to just make you laugh anymore...she wants to turn you on.

All in all, girls are nothing but trouble. If you beg to differ, enlighten me please.

This song is bloody awesome. No seriously, its a total sing along song, so I was nice enough to provide you with part of the lyrics. I am making you listen to it by having it on auto play. Thanks Erika for refreshing my iPod! Someone understanding why hip hop rules the generation.



These days you barely even say my name
Like you don’t really feel the same
I’m wondering whats to blame
These nights, I fall asleep wondering where you are
It feels like we’re falling apart
And it’s totally breaking my heart

Cause if bein’ with you means being alone
And never knowing when you’re comin’ home
Then I guess I’m better off on my own

But I cant move on
Cause that means forgettin, forgettin, everything we had
Instead I keep running, keep running, I keep running back
Cause I keep forgettin, forgettin, you treat me so bad
So I keep on comin, keep comin, I keep comin back

On. Constant. Replay. Good. Bye.

The photos are beyond help. Anyway! To the Most Annoying Chindian I know, Amanda Foo. 20. My advice.. maybe you would like to start acting like a mature adult. And! Break up with a boy before he gives you a Coach bag! I mean if the guilt overwhelms you... I am right here. Your trusty... loyal... understanding... loving... this could take all day, so I will stop here. Love you Fool! Beks, Gan and Val, it already feels too long since we laughed like that! Oh...

I stepped on a snail...gross I know..

Me: GUYS I JUST STEPPED ON AN ORGASM!

Corinne: *blankstare* Orgasm Julie? Orgasm?

I meant to say organism. Just to clarify, cause a certain VJC student I told did not comprehend... Love you Prema.

Size. Does. Matter.

This is complete girl talk. So I suggest, Boys, (if there are any reading this),if you don't want to get your ego bruised, stop reading right here, right now. However, if you want to brave the truth. Then step into girl world.

Eri, Kim and I skipped out on Public Speaking lecture and this is what we publicly spoke about.

It all started with me telling Kim and Eri about how my friend, Monica, who is studying nursing, saw one, which was the size of a thumb. The initial reaction:

Vanessa: WHAT??!! THATS LIKE A FREAKING TIC TAC??

Me: IS HE MARRIED?? OH WELL HE MUST BE DIVORCED BY NOW!

The man on the operating table was indeed married. His race? "Like a freaking tic tac".... Need I say more? Can I just say, unless the topic comes up, us girls, don't talk about it. We do not define a guy by how well endowed he is, unlike how a girl is defined by how big her jugs are. Guys rate Girls in their head (and I am sure out loud as well). Likewise. The first thing we notice is the general appearance. Among my group of friends there are labels. Like, grab-neck-and-just-want-to-make-out, or just-want-to-take-his-clothes-off and the very exceptional, Could-Cut-The-Sexual-Tension-With-A-Knife. Just to name a few, they aren't all that aggressive. "A lady in the streets, but a freak in the bed", thats what we all want to live by.

I realised, that if you want to keep the fact that you are vertically challenged a secret, GET RID OF THE SKINNY JEANS! They reveal more than you might ask for. Oh and if you think hiding behind that pair of bermudas is going to shield you from the critical eye. It doesn't. So what can you do if you lack in length? According to Erika, nothing. Personally...I don't know. Make up for it emotionally? Karma Sutra? Surgery(extreme much)? They (Her World Mag) say that when you are married, 4 times a week is the key to solidity in a marriage. HAHAHA. Solidity. Did you catch that? Anyway, I think if you can't say "Call me, So I can make it juicy for you" with any sense of truth in it, don't Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk. At least girls are willing to admit they have honey stars in comparison to water melons. It really is so much easier being a girl. You are either Perky or Full. If you are both? You are a goddess.

FYI, there is alot we can tell from a hug too. Ciao.

I got soul, but I am not a soldier. Its true.

So Halloween is coming up. I don't get what the big hype is. Its an American tradition, how bout keeping it that way Singapore? Don't be lame and go trick or treating around your neighbourhood. Halloween is way too cool for us-all-we-think-about-is-getting-into-NUS folk. Its like trying to make Hady Mirza work. He is singing a song for a TV channel.... He has obviously hit the big time.I foresee an MTV Music award coming his way. Anyway, I do like how giant packets of Reese go on sale during this time. The peanut butter filled chocolate cups. To die for. I have decided to give up chocolate. I've said this twice in 2 weeks. The fact that I have to say it again is obviously not a good sign. Its the addictive in the chocolate. Its hard to say "no" to. Its like Freddo just speaks to you. The green Cadbury frog. I mean who would have thought that a slimey amphibian would attract consumers. I think I am going to go on a shopping fast as well. Yea... who wants to put their money where their mouth is!

FYI. I am nice! And sometimes a little retarded. Okay understatement of the year. Almost all the time, quite retarded. I am NOT a Plastic! Just cause I have arched eyebrows and cute shoes does not make me a Mean Girl! Hahah. No I should be annoyed at this perception. I am. Annoyed. I speak for my peeps. Right! Eri, Jan and Kim. This thought came to mind, as I received new information on my gossip line. There is a traitor in your midst. Drama much, but hilarious. Oh I AM GOING TO SEE RIHANNA IN CONCERT!!!!!!!! Is that awesome or is that awesome??? Tara.

2 months until Kimmy's birthday. Till then it won't feel quite right. School is good cause my timetable is awesome. My phone is finally but painfully slowly breaking down on me. And I've never experienced silence that is so loud, because it is in the silence that speaks volumes.

Eri! Listen!
Madonna- Miles Away.

And I can end the planet in a Holocaust.

Alive and on top
My reach is global
My tower secure
My cause is noble
My power is pure.

Kim and Eri, for you. Because I know you want to sing along.

Spending the last few days of this pathetic excuse for a holiday has been pretty awesome actually. Went to Arena with Erika Liana, where I had a run in with one of the African American performers. Well, actually no. He was running out of the toilet and ran straight into my jaw, by accident.He hit me hard though. He was cute, I forgave quickly. Eri got quite a bit of attention that night. It's like they smelt your singlehood a mile away. Then it was high time we celebrated Jannah's 18th. We did it in true Gossip Girl style no less. Too long and not easy to explain. Hope you loved every bit of it Little J.

















Kimmy and Eri! Mission complete, job well done! Oh and Eri, I know I promised I would get Facebook, but I never specified when. Didn't Contract Law teach you anything love? Haha, You know I love you right.

The day a naked guy passed out behind a locked door. His story will never die. Too bad for him.