Anna and Ella: They are already talking up a storm

My wife and I were last in Fenelon Falls visiting our twin grand-daughters in September, to celebrate their first birthday and the fact they were already taller than me.

Now they are almost 14 months old and, in my opinion, absolutely rule the roost.

Their mom and dad, who we also visit with, even though the girls get all of the attention, will be free to have a lengthy conversation with us in about 19 years time. I'll be 80 years old and likely shuffling around the house in red long johns and bunny slippers.

Don't laugh.

I already have the slippers.

While carrying Ella around her parents' kitchen this afternoon she spoke to me.

She said, "Ma."

"Hey, close enough," I said.

Ella's mother told me that she was saying 'Max.' Her cousin Max's picture was on the fridge.

Brilliant kid, I thought.

I don't think I said my first words until I was almost 2 years old.

At age 3 I said my first full sentence.

I said, "Dad, can we change the channel, please? Red Skelton is on another station."

No one was as impressed as I was today when Ella spoke to me.

***

How old were you were you first watched Red?

.

My C. St. routine has been turned upside down: Help

Can anyone tell me why Corrie St. is on at 6:30 p.m. instead of 7:00 on CBC TV?

Fine, fine. I need to get a life, I admit.


["Caught in the act. But I didn't catch it!"]

But, at least the one I have is fairly well organized and keeps me off the streets at night. My mother, bless her soul, would be very pleased.

But, our hockey game went a bit long tonight for a couple of reasons, and had I remembered that C. St. was on early I’d have hurried a bit more in the dressing room after the game.

Stink. What happened in the first 15 minutes?

.

Real Time: The TV show 24 isn’t as exciting as this Part 2

Jack Bauer... move over. Nothing’s more exciting than real life.

Friend Don and I met for coffee recently.

I said, “Good to see you. Where’s the barn board you promised? Hurry.”

The heck with a long greeting, eh? I couldn’t wait to see the sample he brought from a landfill site (affectionately known as the dump) near his hometown.

He reached under the table and pulled out a 16 inch long piece from an 18 inch wide plank.


I knew it was a century old, at least, because of the square head nails snagged in his shirt.

“When can we go for more?” I said.


“Ummm, Wednesday morning at ni...”

“Brilliant. Drink your coffee.”

***

You ask, why get excited about century-old barn board?

Let me count the ways! Stay tuned.

.

Real Time: The TV show 24 isn’t as exciting as this

So, if you have a workshop, sweat about where to get good materials for a low price, make brilliant looking birdhouses (among other amazing things), sell a few items on the side, don’t declare the income because you’re retired and are somewhat opposed to working for the man, like getting your hands dirty, and your feet... then this story is for you.

My friend Don sent me an email recently and said the following:

Subject: barn board

Gord:

I knew the title would get your attention. I managed to make it to the dump yesterday near closing time. There was a pile of barn board that I think would be great for birdhouses. I took one sample so if you would like to see it, I could bring it in tomorrow.

Don


["The last of my lumber": photo GAH]

Oh boy, he got my attention.

I wrote back:

Don:

Let’s meet tomorrow. I'll buy coffee at The Black Walnut - about 9:15?

I am completely out of barn board at this time, and can use it immediately.

Gord

Can you not feel the excitement?

All of this happened in real time.

Stay tuned.

.

My Point of View: Elizabeth May, Green Party, should play ‘Let’s Make a Deal’

She’s now going to be seen on TV during the Leader’s debate thanks to a variety of factors including the following:

A loud hue and cry (“Unfair! Unfair!”) was heard across the land on May’s behalf


Prime Minister Harper and NDP leader Jack Layton folded up like cheap tents, as they should - because they’re cheap tents

The media consortium in charge of debates woke up to reality

And now, Elizabeth should wake up to reality as well, realize she has a snowball’s chance of even forming a recognizable opposition party in the next 80 years and that the environment can’t wait that long just to hear her party’s voice in the Commons.


She should advance her environmental agenda by partnering with the Liberals.

[Layton should do the same but he sees himself atop the Big House.]


By creating links with the one major party that actually cares about the state of our air, land and water she would do more for the environment than almost any other person in Canada.

On TV, or with a few seats in the Commons - not so much, if anything.

.

It Strikes Me Funny: There’s more skin on TV than ice bergs

One reason entertainment gets more coverage than the environment is because there’s more skin showing on TV than say... on the rapidly disappearing Arctic ice shelves.

An article entitled ‘Lots of skin on the tube’ declared today:

‘It’s the boob tube’s bustiest time of year.”

And it’s right.

Put skin in the Arctic and busts turn blue. Ratings plummet. Easy as that.


And how can the environment compete with ‘the fantastic 5’ TV shows?

Corner Gas - Everyone has gas. We can relate.

Heroes - Everyone wants super powers. Come on, admit it. Need milk and eggs. Zip. I’m back. Next?

The Office - The characters crack wise at work. Who doesn’t want to do that?

The Tudors - Money. Sex. Power. Sex. I’m there.

Desperate Housewives - Money. Sex. Power. Sex. I’m exhausted. But who wouldn’t want that life?

Well, maybe not me.

At my age I get tired just looking for the remote.

And I should spend more time on fundamentals than fun - at least half the time right?

Especially if the fundamentals are disappearing.

.

The Top Ten TV shows in Canada: Numbers 1 - 5 [incl. deep analysis]

For your viewing pleasure here are half of the Top 10 television programs in Canada for the week of Feb. 18 - 24, with viewer numbers and my personal commentary at no extra charge.

1 "Academy Awards" (CTV, Sunday) - 4,424,000

Since there are only 33,390,141 of us and less than 12 per cent of mature adults can stay up past 11 o’clock without nodding off I’d say we definitely love movies and stars and carpets and fashions and long, long TV shows about all those things.


2 "Academy Awards Pre-Show" (CTV, Sunday) - 2,778,000

We even love the TV show that comes on an hour before the TV show about movies and stars and carpets and fashions. Though it’s not as interesting the numbers are still pretty high because it’s on earlier and we’re not nodding off yet.

3 "American Idol" (CTV, Wednesday) - 2,512,000

Canadians love to watch the little guy go for the glory or reach for the stars, though we all know there’s a better chance he’ll embarrass himself miserably in front of, in this particular case, over two and a half million others.

4 "American Idol" (CTV, Tuesday) - 2,236,000

A lot of us also want to do the same thing one night earlier.

5 "Survivor: Micronesia" (Global, Thursday) - 1,978,000

This show was popular because a lot of Canadians like medical shows. The title sounded like someone lived through a tiny case of amnesia. I'm pretty sure Macronesia would have fared better.

Please see The Top Ten TV shows in Canada: Numbers 6 - 10 with more deep analysis at Four Mugs and a Crock.

The above information was found at The Canadian Press site. (Feb 29, 2008)