.Thursday, August 13, 2009 ' 10:05 AM Y
I remember I thought about this the other day while I was on a long bus ride home. Something about songs and how it reminds you of someone. Surely out of the circle of friends one has, each friend has an altogether different song that you are reminded of them, right? No two person can really share the same song; or maybe that's in my case. Happy songs, sad songs all gel together to make you remember a person and I wonder does the genre strikes any resemblance to the person itself? Say, if a particular someone is a sad person, is he/she always represented by sad/hopeless songs?As for me, what kind of songs do I remind others of? It's interesting to think but I haven't really got my own answer because I think I aint like them when music keeps them company.
I think about the days and times that we had together with everybody else in the picture where we used to have so much fun playing catching doing nothing and being all over the place and it didn't bother me until it struck me hard that things are not the same now and we are starting to drift even further so how am I going to be alright? Work gets tougher days gets harder and the tears are all coagulating in my throat I think about things we share and will be sharing day and night I just can't wait for the day when everything going be the same.
Every now and then, the words that you once spoke flash through my mind. Everything seems so clear and real as though you're beside me. It just scary at times.
You told me that I didn't need to have many friends to be happy I just needed a few who knew me exactly and would always be there to spend time with me. I didn't need to bother about how others feel and just care about myself most of the time instead of worrying about almost everything. And as long as I know we have the best friends together and with all of them and a few others in our lives we're content.
I haven step into the oh-so-boring school but fun-filled class for whole of this week. My eyes got so bad that i had difficulties opening them which makes me irritated and somehow blind and felt useless about. I need Teddy to guide me around as if i'm some kid.Having to wake up at odd timing to drip eyedrop, fan my poor eyes so just i could sleep comfortable. Thanks plenty! I'm home most of the time and i'm sure you guys who knows me well will think i'm mad! i hardly spent my time at home but i actually did it not for almost whole of this week. It actually felt nice and i didnt have to spend money. =D
alrite, time for bed!
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
.Friday, July 24, 2009 ' 9:45 AM Y
RAWR! This week has been an energy draining as well as squeezing of liters of brain juice out. H&w ut was kinda out of topic, it's more like in primary school that we learnt health education. I wonder if my answers will lead me to even a grade C. I dont know what they are exactly asking for. For example: list 3 personal hygiene to be carry out in a camp at east coast park.
Was going through econs 6p on wed night when i realise i dont understand a single thing at all. I bet i forget everything i learnt that very day. I need to even go to the extent of re-dl the ppt we submit. But still, i couldnt really recall what i learnt. How terrible is that! Decided to skip school on thursday morning, a very last minute decision. Studied while waiting for D to arrive. Left to Imm for dinner and back again when i had a 2hrs nap instead of 30mins. Continue to study and left for bugis at only 8pm.
Lesson was enough to kill because we are tasked to organise an event. I have yet to continue with the ppt slide i left off earlier. Not to even say that, i haven had my shower since i got home at 1130pm. Feeling way happy that i finally can have more news songs the worst came, i couldnt find my thumbdrive! i'm feeling extremely upset now, not even B&J ice-cream nor shopping gona help. I just want my thumdrive back badly. Many will think you can just get a new one but sadly, i've got tons of document store in it.
I pray this weekend gona be a good one which i get to rest, meet up with bestie and get more things done. My time management seems so horrible right now! oh yeah, finally i get to see the little boy and his momsy. The little boy is so damn cute! hope to meet up with them again sometime soon, i miss my primary school days having them around. As of now i just need time to tick at its own pace, let me spend the most time out of every weekend and have every single motivation to study for the upcoming ut 3 and hopefully pass my tp in few weeks time.
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
.Tuesday, July 14, 2009 ' 9:38 AM Y
I had a long day and it sorta didnt ended well but at least i manage to speak up and i see a need to. I'm sorry, i hope you understand. I'm not like her and i wont wanna a single day in my life to be like that cause it's disgusting ttm! I hope everything gona be how it used to. I've so much to say to you! As i type this, tears kept flowing.
I wanna say i'm sorry. it takes 2 hands to clap.Situations which i never experience before. Our own B&J world when nothing seems to matter. We talk about anything and everything, fooling around.
Sometimes, i wish i can be a man.So i can hide away my tears, being strong.
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
.Thursday, July 9, 2009 ' 7:57 AM Y
my english has deproved by alot, time to read more books and type and speak in proper sentence. i wonder how people can be an angel but yet the next moment, you see an devil in them. Whenever i think it brings along disappointment and at times hatred. If things were to remain, will it be happening like how it is today when everything seems to be in a mess and no one is trying to make the first move in clearing it and still pretending everything alright.Those times spent together indeed are the most memorable one when everyone seems to be so carefree, nothing seems to matter.Whenever i'm down, the people that i hang out with are always the best companion.They can cheer me up easily and took my sadness away but it doesnt seems to be happening rite now. Has it been part of growing up that we contact lesser when all of us has a new bunch of newly made friends.
On another point of view, at least things are changing. I get to see the changes in people, the environment and all. Sometime I'm exhausted from thinking about them and even the work that are not done and has to be done, from the long night which I found myself staying up unconsciously for. So much discontent so I want to be happier to be around people, around things that are worthy for.
YEAH! Tomorrow's Friday. There's 2 ways to how I look at it coming - brain juicing sports management ut which i have to sit for. The previous one was badly done! Gona enjoy my night by visiting smu night bazzar if possible either before or after i head to dempsey for dinner. I cant wait for lessons to end tomorrow! =D =D Weekends are line up with activity. Momsy wont be in town on Sun!
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
.Tuesday, June 16, 2009 ' 6:54 AM Y
disappointment fills moi night, i dun rmb feeling this way for mths. The feeling is even more horrible when yew cant seems to get even a simple job done as close to perfection. I need to brush up moi skills on editing foto, layout and the list just goes on. Sumtym, i wish i've 48hrs a day so i get moi things done on tym, meetin up wit ppl. Sumtym, i wish i've got ample energy so i can enjoy moi day without feeling tired. Maybe it's moi who sucks badly in tym managing as well.
I've got 3 uts tis week and it's making moi go insane! I dun rmb studyin for O's tis hard all I did was to lay moi books open and start dreaming and gossip abt pppl and then hop over to macs to have fries wit mayo and garlic chilli and go library early in e morn to reserve seats but we end up laughing over silly things and havin FUN. And now I study alone and all e fun and friends are missing. Cruel cruel cruel! We're meant to lose them in e event of growing process.
Tym will be tym dey can't be returned dey'll remind yew of how young yew were tat yew've wasted ur youth but had the best time of ur life. I just want to finish studying for them and get editin of fotos done up so I can lie in bed and feel weak and hav D msging moi and that makes moi happy and disregard all the stuff tat made moi sad.
And when I knw tat I'm falling, dere'll be ur hands stretched to catch moi.
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
.Sunday, June 14, 2009 ' 7:47 AM Y
The weekend I had was short but i got to spend with frens and D. We spent most of the tym tgt, if nt asleep then awake. y'dae was e first tym i ever felt so sad wen i didnt manage to get e pair of flats frm club marc. i went ard sourcing literally every single outlet but still disappointment set in. BOO! But the laughter we had was hell crazy and some bitching session wit bff. I rmb moiself laughin every few mins tis morn which woke Oscar up cox of the conversation in between or simple action which made moi laugh lyk i nvr laugh before in moi whole life. I ate B&J lyk finally aft i duno how long in e wee hours and i ate lyk 1/4 of e tub. Sorry guys!
I went frm bishan-vivo-clarkquay-bugis-town and e moment i came home zoom to bed aft doing all e necessary stuff and am finally blinded by wat amount of effort tat shld be put in is actually enuff to call it a day for studying, I nvr knew nvr understood and nvr had tat sense of accomplishment. it goes back to where moi choices shld lay and how unconvinced I still am wit whatever I'm doin now thou I'm not really complaining, but it's hard to see where moi future lies, whether tis is even an option, then tis growing up phase shld bring me thru it.
Anyway, working in westmall was insane! But still i get to see familiar faces and some short chats wit ppl whom i haben met for sumtym.School's starting tml but decided to skip it. Meeting Bff for lunch tml at Bugis! Nxt week gona passby fast i hope with 3uts to sit for, killer!
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
.Thursday, May 28, 2009 ' 10:24 AM Y
Sumtym i wonder, am i supposed to sacrifice moi personal happiness all e tym? Jus to make those ard moi happy? Will it eventually becum exhausting? Feeling a sense of fatigue, both mentally and physically. Sumtym i wan to just lay on e bed and shut off frm e world. Perhaps by doing tis, then i'd be slightly happier?Moi life could probably not sux anymore right now. For some reason, i'm really looking forward to it. Life is busy. Life is a constant race.
it's been a long tym since i felt tis way and tis morn was horrible wen i actually cried.thoughts run thru moi mind and flash back of some incidents. it got moi realli affected and it seems tat everything is in a repeat mode which i'm so afraid of. Sumtym it realli is killin e inside of moi, e guilt which doesnt seems to go away.
anyway, happy birthday bestie! thanks for acc moi for dinner by walkin frm toh guan all e way to jurong town council. haha! enjoy ya special day yo and stop telling ppl i treat yew to mac for b'dae. wat an ass uh! for gawd sake, stop laughin at moi scream moi lungs out jus nw. Erase it off frm ya mind. greatly appreciate.
' sumwhere over the rainbow♥
