May 2012

Whew, life has been so hectic lately.  May was a long month and after a couple of birthdays (Guy and me, plus more); two extended weekend trips; one move (we're renting the cutest house and got out of a crappy condo); week-long visit from Guy's family; a 10K race, and more . . . I'm just glad to be settling into a new home and trying to get back to 'normal'.

'Normal' seems far away still, though.  Nothing is cheeky or cheery here.  Guy's been gone all of June to sit by his dad's bedside in Indiana during his losing fight with lung-cancer.  He's hanging in there, but getting weaker and weaker each day.  Its been really tough knowing how much he must be suffering and watching Guy in agony, knowing I'm helpless (and far away) in the situation.  And, selfishly - I miss him and I wish he were home with me to settle into our new home since it's lonely without him; but, he's where he needs to be right now.

Hope you're all doing well!  Happy Summer . . . do you have any exciting plans?

And, our month in photos . . .

[Guy's family in Frisco, CO]

[cousins.  what happens when you leave your phone unattended]

[my birthday in Rocky Mtn National Park]

[Guy's mom panning for gold]

 [Guy mowing the grass]

[hoover dam]

[cocktails at the Cosmopolitan in Vegas]

[Vegas at night]

[BolderBoulder]

Sound and Soul

I've been floundering a bit lately... my life has hit a really great, wonderful, "comfortable" pattern.  But, the comfort has come with a bit of complacency.  I'm very happy, so I'm not sure where to turn, what to look for, or how to find the passion again that lights my soul.  I think a part of it is that I'm no longer working on any major goal and hence, my personal growth isn't striving for an obvious outcome.   Lucky as I am to be content, I've been spending time looking for something "more" that I know is out there (or within me).

While this isn't necessary the "more" -- I did stumble upon the is really, super-awesome, fantastic, fun-loving Van Sessions by Nikki Bluhm and the Gramblers.  It was the first time in a long time that a new music discovery brought joy to my soul.  I spent yesterday afternoon listening to them all.  And, while I don't have a favorite, per se, I do recommend you watch a few and discover Nikki's voice and the band's wonderful sound yourself (start with the Hall and Oats song complete with kazoo, Whitney Houston song, Islands in the Sun, and Don't Worry Be Happy).  And, what an awesome concept - the van - at first I thought they weren't going anywhere, but I think each song is actually recorded as they're driving, it must be a long road since I didn't notice them stop for any lights or stop signs or make any obvious turns (much like my own life!!).  Wish I knew where they were going!?  And, I'm hopeful to find a new place for me to go so I can experience additional growth.

Another new year

its a little bit late for a Happy New Year post, but I'm just trying to get updated with blogging and am astounded that its already Feb 2012. I hope to blog more now because i finally found a way to work on the blog without having to log-out of my google account. I had been looking for awhile for a way to switch it over from my old hotmail-blogger account to my gmail/google account without having to change the url. Whew, that was a feat. I'd been really annoyed for a long time that I'd have to log-out of gmail in order to log-in to my blogger account and that I couldn't associate the two together. I still wasn't able to "merge" accounts, but I can administer the blog now from both accounts so I'm happy for now.

its a bit surreal that everything is merging with google (i.e. blogger, and now picnik, an online picture editor where I originally made my blog header), which I feel is encompassing our lives, and not just online (although I did switch to the chrome browser yesterday and its so fast compared firefox). Guy started working for google full-time in January and he couldn't be happier. I'm not sure exactly what all he does; he's pretty tight-lipped about all the confidential projects that keeps him busy. What I do know is that he works as a software engineer in a group that deals with the backend for "google docs".

At home, our landlords decided to try and sell the condo we're living in, so we found a new apartment that we can move into in July. If they sell it sooner I guess we'd consider moving sooner (our lease ends August 2). We'd both really be happier buying something nicer and bigger, but Boulder property prices are insane.

February is also a good time to check-in with new year's resolutions. i didn't really make these, because I don't believe in them. They're always too drastically and unrealistic, which can lead to failure. Instead, I made two January-resolutions, both which I accomplished. (Giving myself a pat on the back). I gave up lattes and sodas for the month because of both health and monetary reasons. The soda wasn't as hard as the lattes (but at a work potluck, I poured a glass of root beer and then had to give it to a co-worker when I realized it wasn't Feb yet). In December, I felt out-of-control with all the Starbucks and other coffee-shop holiday drinks that I needed to go through withdrawal. I think I'm addicted more to the sugar than the caffeine. Even though I've had a couple in the last 12 days, I'm trying to only have one once/week and just really savor each one as a treat.

Plus, we're trying to make larger lifestyle changes; ones that we've wanted to make for awhile, and ones which are realistic to be small-steps and habits-in-the-making. We started meal planning and its helped us make more efficient grocery trips with a focus on more cooking at home, with whole foods. We've been pretty successful at moving away from processed foods. Most of what we buy is perishable food ... so the hardest part has been making sure we eat doesn't end up rotten or in the trash. I found some great tips and a meal-planning document from this blog -- http://tradingpounds.com/ (one of Guy's really good friends is friends with this girl, and she has a great story!) Her "How to Lose" book has the meal planner and other good info.

And, I've finally become a morning-exerciser. It's been one of my lifelong goals to workout before getting ready for the day, but having the will-power to do it is a daily fight. I feel so proud on the days that I do go, and the more I go, the more I intend for it to be a habit. The gym is very close to our house to even going for 25-40 minutes early in the morning isn't that hard, can be quick, and is not the kill-me kind of workout that deters me from returning the next day.

More updates to come...

- the recovery of Guy's stolen car, and then selling the car

- Valentine's Day and our upcoming Estes Park trip

recovery

I had my surgery on Friday.  It's been two days and I'm feeling more normal now.  I half-way showered today and felt less like a bum because of it.

Having a huge gash in my neck isn't even something I worried about.  (Other thoughts occupied my pre-surgery anxious state -- like not waking up after surgery, waking-up during surgery, not being able to move my head, bleeding too much, blood clots, etc...) But, a Halloween-appropriate bandage across my neck?  Nada.  Until... we went out for lunch today.  I scurried and found a scarf to hide my gross neck.  There's just something about eating in public with an obvious blood-dried and crusty neck wound that I couldn't muster.

I must say, staying home and relaxing is a pretty good way to recover.  The best part: frequent naps and the wonderful people who help with my every need.  Today's outing for lunch was nice though to prevent me from going stir crazy.  I hope to be back to the normal routine soon.  Thanks for my mom who stayed with me for the weekend and to Guy who has been as wonderful as always.

Here's an unwanted post-op picture; you can tell, the nurse and I are not amused.

(But the wheelchair-recliner ride in the hospital was pretty awesome, especially when I was still woozy from the anesthesia).

Grrr...

Last week Guy's car was stolen.  Ugh!  We reported it, and it took some convincing for the policeman to believe us.  (Really, Boulder is pretty safe, except apparently our parking lot).  Sadly, we probably won't recover it and Guy's insurance claims were denied.

The rest of the story is that we used his trunk as a storage for our camping gear, his bike rack, his golf clubs, etc.  We went to the REI garage sale a couple weeks ago, and came back with shoes and more shoes (and other goodies).  Had we known our fate though, we could have stocked up on tents, sleeping pads, and sleeping bags.  Now, we're starting over with our stockpile (at retail prices, too).

garage sale galore

Goodbye Civic . . . we wish you'd come home!

SLC and Kristi/Josh visit

California

View from Hotel

 Malibu

 Farmer's Market

Garden at Getty Museum

SD

GR visit - July

View of GR

Wyoming Paintbrush (state flower)

Zach's birthday and Cars cake

Guy holding the pinata

drum circle

This was a performance during the conference I recently helped organize and run.  So touching, it was by far, my favorite part of the two-day event.