i just gave the cold shoulder,
or rather i just ignored.
what have i become?
i really really dont want to be like that,
but i just couldnt control.
its like, i find it harder and harder to break the ice.
i always depends on them to talk to me first,
never the other way round.
the more you shut yourself in,
the more difficult it gets to come out.
oh my goodness,
what have i become?
POSTED BY kAi ON Monday, September 17, 2012 @ 11:30 PM
my eyes are so swollen..
they are being swollen for so often lately,
till a point im too tired to cry, too sick of crying..
to fight against something injustice,
i need a heart made of metal..
dont push me away, please.
i have never thought of anything like that.
its so mentally grueling.
POSTED BY kAi ON Saturday, September 15, 2012 @ 8:45 PM
別忘了答應自己要做的事情；別忘了答應自己要去的地方。無論有多難、有多遠。
Dont forget what you have promised yourself you want to do; dont forget where you have promised yourself you want to go. No matter how difficult or how far they are.
:)
POSTED BY kAi ON Friday, September 14, 2012 @ 12:32 AM
it really doesn't feel good to be questioned and doubted upon EVERY single time when im out.
things like " u sure u are going to school?" ‘你真的是去学校吗？’ made me feel accused. and i seriously hate the feeling of being accused since young.
something really bad is creeping on me. i feel myself losing the motivation to mug or even look for a job or whats not.
and it makes me even more not motivated when im really stuck at my research. stuck as in really stuck. there isnt any info on what i want to find. nothing. nothing at all. i feel so helpless. really helpless.
fyp is such a lonely journey. dont really feel like asking for my prof for help because i feel like im not doing anything. even the topic is given by him, and now if i still go to him for help on research, i feel like im so useless.
oh man.
have never felt this bad about school work before.
im stress. but not stress. more like stress till i dont want to do anything about it.
stuck in a rut.
i hope everything will be ok.POSTED BY kAi ON Thursday, September 13, 2012 @ 11:56 PM
Happy 20th Monthsary! (heart)
it has been 20 months already.
really looking forward to the 24th month!
our 2nd year! ^^
Thankyou for always tolerating me, for being my wall of support and for being my safety net.
i love you.POSTED BY kAi ON Tuesday, September 11, 2012 @ 9:39 PM
