its been a week since that awful day =(

i have many randoms thots in my mind now, so pardon my disorientation..

been to ntu and sim open hse le.. didnt realli like the latter=X its like when i step inside there, i didnt feel like staying long.. and there wasnt a sense of belonging.. i guess sim will be the last thing on my mind.. shall apply for ntu and nus first.. cos sim's application is damn ex, like 100 bucks i think.. and if i heng heng get into ntu or nus, i have to withdraw from sim and cant take back that money.. so i dowan to risk the $$.. since sim got another intake in bout sept or wat.. i shall wait till sept den apply if i realli cant get in local uni.. and i seriously hope this will nv happen..

and i've been getting advices from colleagues and frens and i'm getting abit lost and confused.. my colleagues got some come from ntu, nus and sim.. and one from sim even got a doctorate now.. aft hearing wat they say it seems like sim is nt that bad.. but the sch fees can kill.. i dowan my mama to end up selling hse to pay for my sch fees.. haha ok nt that serious la.. but i am afraid the high sch fees will take a toll on my parents=/ somemore every year have to pay 1000bucks for exams.. and heard weilin say that zhiyi's cousin study in sim and her sch fees is bout 10k per year! *faints* ok la mayb can get loan or wat from bank, but this kind of loan surely alot of conditions de=/ have to check out their interest plans first..

and YES! aft discussing with mum, i've finally decided nt to retake! i'm nt going back to tpjc neither am i going to retake as private.. worst come to worst i will go sim lo.. and i might work part time to earn for my fees.. ohhh.. and i am glad that i sort of have a course that i am realli interested in.. i wan to take mathematical science in ntu! =D u gotta have passion in maths to take that course.. and i think i have la.. haha.. used to hate maths, but aft my sec sch maths teacher and mr ng's influence, i am starting to love maths.. wahaha.. other than that, i might consider HSS psychology in ntu le.. and mayb arts and social sci in nus.. ok mayb i think too much le.. scully all these course dowan me.. but no harm setting a goal and no harm trying to apply ma! thats wat baby has been telling me =) i will try my best to achieve wat i wan =)

my mood is feeling lighter now, er is lighter the right word? ha dun care la.. i am feeling less moody le =)

tml going nus open hse with baby and den evening going jiayi hse to celebrate her bday! woO! she planned a party at her hse and the theme is japanese.. i am excited =D