I have moved to WordPress at the same blogname. My lappy cannot load Blogger on IE and its super irritating me >:|

Labels: My Current Affairs

People say a dog is man's best friend.

When he suffered a serious seizure on Mon it was only then that I realised I've taken his companionship so much for granted. He has always been this fuss-free easy dog. He is not playful at all. He even freaks out when a toy makes a squeaky sound. He was easily contented,  all he needed was for us to be by his side even it means just letting him sit on my lap.

I feel guilty for neglecting him these last couple of years, only satisfying his basic needs but did not spend as much time as I should. Sometimes even getting frustrated with him for peeing all over the home. Lynda the dog whisperer said that Benjy loved us and said that he was well loved by us. That made me teared instantaneously cos I was overwhelmed by guilt. I could have loved him more but I didn't. He missed going to the park and wanted to spend quality time with us. Chari and I walked him along the last park he has been too before heading home. Lynda did say that he was ready to go if we're ready to let him go. He was holding on cos that was what we wished. Even till the end he was this lovable boy who thinks so much for us first even when he was suffering hell. Eventually we did tell him that he can go when he wants to, we do not want to see him suffer.

After we got home he needs to be on glucose jab every 2-hourly. He hardly rested through the night and was breathing very hard. Finally at almost 6am I had a gut feeling that my dear boy was leaving. I hesitated to give the jab as I really can feel that he's leaving. I hold onto his body and without struggle he breathed his last breath. I witnessed his body stopped moving (due to the heavy breathing earlier), and acknowledged that he has really left us. I never had such a telepathy moment before. The feeling was undesirable. I just knew he was going to move on. Seeing him go like that, I felt peaceful for a while.

People say when a belved pet dies, they go to a place called the Rainbow Bridge where they are restored to good health and can have fun until they meet their owners again. Then, they will cross the bridge together. I really dont know if I would ever see Benjy again but I really do hope that he will he happy where he is now, running happily in the meadows with no illness and pain.

Benjy, thanks for being part of our family for 16y3m. We love you ♥

Labels: Benjy, Family, My Current Affairs

爸爸走了。。就在我召集大家的祝福那天, 走了。

我和爸是在他搬进我们家后才开始较熟悉一点, 他在医院的时候再加情进些。他的离开, 大家坦然面对 但其实都无法接受。手术是那么直接的步骤, 手术后他也恢复得很好。。局势怎么忽然就这么逆转呢?

心里很多为什么。。。或许这就是命吧! 谁都无法改变的命运。

三个礼拜了。偶尔家里发生一些无法解释的事情, 我还真希望真的是爸。

希望他现在不需要有一大堆管子在身上, 自由轻松多了。

我真的想信人死后还是有灵魂的。

Labels: Family, My Current Affairs

I vividly remember this period last year was also exceptionally unhappy. Altho subject matters are different this year, the bad feelings started around the same time. I can't help but relate both together... Is it some sort of unpleasant aura that is lingering?

Fil was admitted to SGH on 06 Oct and was scheduled for an operation two weeks later on 23 Oct. Everything seems fine till then. Two weeks after op on 08 Nov, things took a turn for the worse. His vital signs started dropping and he was sent to SICU. It was a week long ordeal in there semi-unconscious, fighting infection from fluid collection in his lungs and abdomen cavity.. and was just transferred out to ICA this Monday. Everything was gradually improving until Friday when I next saw him. He was panting slightly but could respond and was alert. This evening when zw and I visited him he was on oxygen mask assisted breathing, can't talk nor respond and was breathing very hard.

Sis called ard midnight to inform that dad is going to transfer back to SICU tonight. When I saw her number reflected on my phone, my heart sank. This is the first time I have such feeling since dad's admission. I'm beginning to feel worried about his condition, all of us are.

The family issue last year was eventually resolved on a happy note so if my intuition about the "bad timing " is somehow relevant, please please please God, allow my dad's condition to conclude positively too.

Appreciate anyone and everyone who keeps him in your prayers.

Labels: Family, My Current Affairs, Random Thots

What started off as a spike from someone who looked down on my capability due to my lack of a uni degree evolved into a journey that I cannot and will not look back. I have a very strong character (you can say it's stubbornness) that once I set my mind on something I will make sure I do my best in it. And since I've decided to embark on this 18-month journey to, hopefully, a better future, there shall be no turning back. I'm all ready to face it!

Orientation was held over last weekend and coincidentally I sat beside my (Logistics) course mates during both sessions. Both ladies seem friendly. I'm pretty hopeful that I'll get to know new nice friends :)

First 2 modules - HRM and Economics will start in slightly more than 2 weeks' time. I'm eager yet nervous as the date creeps nearer. Right now I just need to concentrate on getting assignments for both modules done and handed up on first day of class. ♣

Labels: My Current Affairs, Studies

Xavier's lunar bday was right after his English bday on 02 oct. We joked about it saying he grew up 2 years overnight hahaha!

His bday this year was v simply spent. No cake no party no hassle. Brought him for KFC dinner followed by mac Donald ice-cream as per his request on 01 Oct.

We decided not to bring Xazz the next day, just to spend solo quality time w the boy. We end up prawning @ Khatib bottle tree park. Only caught 2 prawns in the 2.5 hours spent there, haha. Xavier was slightly disappointed but was happy about the time spent tog anyway. We let go the prawns before we wrapped up the evening to go pick Xazz.

Labels: Birthdays, Family, Xavier

Xavier went for his weekly swim lesson this morning. While he was doing competitive swimming w his class mates, I noticed he started lagging behind half a lap thru. At the end of the lap he sat at the side and started crying. That was what I could see from my distant view. Little did I know that this he was having acute chest pain. The coach soon brought him over and the lifeguard put on an oxygen mask for him hoping to relieve his discomfort. Coach said that Xavier could be suffering from a panic attack. I decided to bring him to the doc just to be safe.

The doctor at HealthCare assured that Xavier's condition seems more like an exertion than anything else but we went ahead with the heart rhythm test just to be on the safe side. One hour in the clinic later, doctor say his results were fine and there should be no further concerns unless his pain aggravates.

Thank God Xavier is fine.

Labels: Xavier