sometimes i wonder,
am i really such a lousy daughter.

as much as i want to please everyone else,
why do they only see the side they want to see?
& never the effort i'd tried to put in.

perhaps i'm the stubborn one,
being too bothered over nothing.
but the 'nothings' definitely mean sth to me.

*sigh*
i don't know what's with my (bad) mentality,
but i'm really too tired to try anymore.
so i'll just listen to whatever they say,
& YES I WILL DO IT.

but please don't come back shooting at me,
when i used to do A & now B then u want A again.
or even worse, a C.

(or perhaps, i seriously need a personality-wash)

i just realised.

how come i never blog abt my new *pink hp!!! (*SE w595 pink edition)

omg!!!

lol~

when i'm so so so so so happy when i bought it. (my super belated *xmas present from dar*)

my favourite hp so far. ^^ i'll really really really cherish it!

*ber & *steffie said i upgrade le lor. (not in a gd way though) & only *jasmeany didn't have the usual reaction i get from pple when i showed her my phone. =pPpPppPp

anyways...

chang chang! =))



<3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3! <3!<3!

*qian commented that my blog entries are "alternating, happy then sad".

yes, we had been 'quarreling' almost every other day. over minute yet 'quarrelsome' stuff.

oh well.

i shall jus blog abt happy things ^^.

friday night had *steamboat dinner with *guides. it was a nice & auspicious gathering becos our tables were in a '8' shape & initially we had 8 pple lol~ but i think there's super ALOT of msg in the soup. omg. lucky i didn't eat from the *麻辣 side! if not, i think i'll really fall sick!

@ night went dar*'s house to open my presents. haa! actually it's nth much also la but i did a *crossword for him* to fill in. he did it within *10mins wor! not bad la huh! =pPpPpP -muacks- 算你*了！

[& by friday night, we alr let each other know where we*'ll be going on *v-day le. lol~]

sat!

my *dad insisted that i HAD TO THROW ALL MY DRIED FLOWERS AWAY!!!! *sobs* he said they were v unhygenic & attract alot insects!!! *sob sob* so i had NO CHOICE but to throw them all away. =((~ he said: "旧的不去，新的不来。" [but dar* didn't buy me flowers this v-day, cos i told him* not to. the next day my *dad asked me: "wah no new flowers ah?" i shoot back at him =X]

oh well. so i took a photo of b4 throwing them away. i'd counted. 10 bouquets in 20 months. ^^



met dar* in town in the afternoon for his* special treat from me! ^^ the *massage was okay lah. & i think the price's kinda reasonable for 2 treatments. but the place was quite disappointing. i expected it to look much prettier.. lol! (but we didn't get to see the whole place also)

we slacked our evening away becos our *dinner's reservation was @ 9.30pm. the place was so ulu! & dar* keep rushing me to get ready! *rar! but we didn't get lost so i didn't lose my temper. lol~

*wild rocket's a small restuarant under *hang-out hotel. we arrived on time? but still had to wait a little while for our table. we had a *7-course meal & my fav was no doubt the *dessert! *deconstructed oreo cheesecake! kekeke! & they had a complimentary rose for me. ^^

& he* (finally & willingly) took some photos wif me! *yay! =))



&& oh! my *v-day present! he* made a small bouquet of *blue & red roses for me. =)) *11 stalks mean一心一意哦！(>.<)



thank you dumby*. =))

love ya*x3!!!
-muacks-

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活
不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

眼泪
她为你流过
也为自己掉过
对於你们的爱她总是抱着坚强的笑容
错过那些时间谢谢她的守候是时候
紧紧牵她的手带她到你的城堡里

最近还好吗
想念的心开不了口
枯想着你有没有好好过
担心着你每天生活

你好吗最近如何
照顾身体工作加油
我一个人也会勇敢好好过
不让你担心多一秒

想念着
每天每秒我们故事
每天每秒说好的事
两个人一起散步
是最浪漫的事

你是我的天使
给我力量能够坚持

那些关心问候

翅膀一样的双手

是我最幸福的所有

心里面有你建的角落
脆弱时我能够躲一躲

你爱我 像翅膀一样温柔的手
要抱着你不要再错过

你的爱是最蓝那片天空

cuz baby girl I’m coming back home

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活
不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

幸福
少了你在身边
不会完整人潮中朝你走来那张可爱微笑的脸孔
这份爱不是悸动
守护一辈子的感动这段路踏着幸福的每一步一起牵着手

心疼你会睡不好
总是缩在床的一角
我要回来给你依靠
哄你看你笑着睡着

照片里你的微笑
我们甜蜜得打闹
好希望微风把思念
代替我亲吻你嘴角

想念着
每天每秒我们故事
每天每秒说好的事
约定好去看的风景
爱谱成了诗

你就是我的天使
给我力量能够坚持

阳光灿烂午後

我又在街上走

你的影子不再寂寞

想到你的身边到不了
像个路人般看热闹

经过那个属於我们的转角
走过两个人曾经逛的街

那些店
还有熟悉的画面

oh baby girl I’m coming back home

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活
不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

没有办法想像
那画面一个孤独的背影走在
小公园一颗心
需要暖 一双手
需要牵故事要有美好结局
需要两双手来写永远
不是只出现在童话里的梦在身边
眼泪加了蜜糖甜这句点
要完美画在无名指上承诺的开始
恋人们要一起珍藏

today is a happy day. =))

met *bestie for lunch after school. think we had the most inexpensive meal tgt after so many many years. haa! had *korean food @ *taka's basement & *orange julius drinks that were so so cold!

afterwhich we went shopping!!! when there're only the 2 of us, crazy things DO happen. haa! i love my *bestie anyways!! =)) & she got her late bday treat, 1st present (a super bling bag) & 2 other bags she bought on her own. keke! i bagged home a bag & a wallet. & now i look @ my bag, i don't think it's really that nice afterall. damnn!! i shld had bought the other 1!! =((~ oh well.

***

& sth that touched me @ abt 7.45pm today. =))

[quotes]

you dear dear hubby will alway be here :D

陪你笑，陪你哭， 陪你骂
永远都不会放开你的
要走就走一生一世
陪你一起手牵手走过这一切

:D <3 u oh!!! :D

[un-quotes]

at times i really wonder what will happen to me if i ain't got you* in my life. i'm too easily swayed by others' emotions... like the bad things are actually happening to me instead of them.

i'm sorry for all the bad tempers & words that had sparkled off the 2 'fights'. hmm.. maybe i shld be more fearful of what i fear of, so that (hopefully) things won't happen again. i don't really know for myself either. maybe past experience havn't really taught me well enough. but.. i'll try to figure it out, on the way, to prevent ridiculous things from happening again.

*sigh*

seems like the bad days are here to stay..
for a v, very long time.

& the best way of defence i knew was: avoidance.
yet nth seems to be of any control.

perhaps i just have to get used to the fact that change is really the only constant these days.

today will most probably be the only day for me to be in school @ 9am. (for this sem)

met up wif *dr florence ling in her office. i was so damn unprepared. i couldn't come up with any dependent & independent variables, becos i don't even know what she's asking for. *sigh* felt so lousy. she even helped me to re-write my whole proposal. !!! & after which, she still asked me to re-consider whether or not i'll take her as my supervisor becos she'll be demanding. of cos i wouldn't reject, especially after she had helped me so much & straighten out my thoughts into a feasible *dissertation proposal.

but anyways. it was also then i'd realised something-else. i really don't know what's wif all the affinity. -shrugs- oh well. like *val said, maybe *toot* could have been my long lost best friend. hahaha! =X i really wonder how long will that last though.

so my *dissertation proposal's finally down. that's like the 1st small step of the long journey. hope it'll be smooth sailing bah. [& yes in a v long time, someone had commented that my english's lousy. with 1 grammatical error. oh well. but then again i knew i was total crap during the meeting. so... HAI~]

***

on a happier note, i won $$ on friday night/sat morning!!! whee!! *ban luck is my game! keke! ^^. *mj lost abit but overall still win~~ yaayyy!!

& during *friday lunchtime, dar* was talking abt... *me. *us. idk. had the urge to cry but didn't in the end. i don't really rem much of it now, but... yeah. it kinded ended the bad period.

last sat was dar*'s turn to *bai nian @ my place. it feels totally WEIRD for dar* to be @ my place. so not used to it. & my *mom stayed him* for dinner. omg. okay maybe it sounded no big deal but it's really a big deal in my family. even my *sister was ever so nice to him. & dar* actually HAD sufficient decent conversation wif my family. -woah- i wasn't over-whelmed wif feelings, but yes, thanks for trying. =))

it was never easy to maintain a r/s, especially both our longest one. but thanks for all the patience & giving in. you* know i need plenty of that. =pPpppPp *lovee*.

***

kays. shld get some academic work done. i'm off!