His journey ended but will always be in my memory

My Dad passed away on Boxing Day morning.  He had been ill since Oct 2011.  Managed to discharge him home for 9 days after more than 2 months of stay at the hospital.  I took time off work to help the maid to care for him at home.  And I am glad that I did so.  However it was also very painful to see him suffer.  He was sent back to the hospital after having persistent fever.  And he left us on Boxing Day morning in his sleep but none of us was at his bedside when he passed on.  He was already gone when the nurses check on him.  We did not have a chance to say bye to him but I guess he also don't want to bother us. 

It has been a week since the funeral but I am still having difficulties coping.   I will just tear when I think abt him and I really can't sleep at night.  I am not sure how I am going to manage from now on.  But I will always remember him...

The next phase in life....

This week has been a long and draining week.  Emotions have been up and down.  Got the shock of my life to recieve news that Dad got admitted to hospital for another stroke.  Yah this is the 2nd time and I must say he is very lucky that he survived this time. 

He was still able to talk to us when he was first admitted.   But condition got worst after that. He is very sleepy most of the time. Currently on NGT and can't talk.  Good thing is that he can still follow instructions and power is still consider good. 

My MSW training has helped for me to prepare what is ahead and also knowing the true reality which can be very bitter at times.  I remember how the Dr show us the scans and trying to emphasize to us on the seriousness of the situation.  And the first thing in my mind is that, if the 3rd one comes along it will be the end of story.

Anyway it is painful to see him in his current condition but I also know that is something that I have to learn to cope with. The ironic part is that back at work, this is supposed to be my area of speciality. I have to see patients with the same conditions and support their families instead.  But maybe after his episode I may be really able to empthaise with them totally. 

Today went to maid agency to employ a maid.  All the things I tell people on a daily basis is happening to me.  Ok, I am not an advocate for getting maids but thanks to nature of my job, maid agencies should give us comission for giving them business.  Anyway the process is tedious and the "heng suay" part that I tell people everyday may happen to me.  Interview 2 persons over the phone.  One ask me if I have a helper at home to help to do household chores!!!  FYI, she is supposed to be the maid but she is asking for another maid!   We manage to get another one instead who sounded ok over the phone.  Minimum she sounds willing to learn.  Now is pending me to do the online test thing which the website is down! 

For once, I really understand how my patients' families feel having to go through all these.  Is going to be a long journey and let's hope that everything go as per plan.  I am really entering into the next phase in life when it is my turn to take care of my parents.   And I truly hope that when I grow up, I will not be a grumpy, difficult old auntie - which I think I will be one :)

一公升的眼泪

Reading this book now <<一公升的眼泪>> aka 1 Litre of Tears.  Got the translated copy from kinokuniya last weekend after watching the drama online.  Something to inspire and remind us that not matter how sucky life is, we need to face it head strong and move on. 

1st post for 2011

1st post of the year and it is already March 2011!!!  Wonder what I have been doing for the past few months?  I really wonder? 

Well, Chinese New Year was spent rotting at home.  Went back to work feeling depressed cos I could not comprehen why I need to work.  Best is that my dear boss told me that I should not "live day by day" on the first day I returned to work.  Note: that is after 2 weeks of leave! 

Yah so not to live day by day and must have a vision and mission of what I want to do in life.   Seriously, I do not aspire to stay in office forever.   But I cannot not live day by day cos I am already half dead living day by day.  Hiazzz... past few Sat have been burnt all thanks to JCIA. 

Only good thing is that manage to spend some time stoning with part of the Blacklisters last week.  And I need to thank the school holidays for that.  If not I am sure they are also half dead.

Achievements for the past few months?  Nothing significant other than I manage to get the Singapore Flyer pass.  Finally got onto Singapore Flyer!  But according to my sister, nobody in the family is excited expect me :(

And the most is that last week went to St James Powerstation for Social Worker's Day.  Yah, everything just flew past and is over liao. Hopefully before I know it, my worklist will also just disappear in a flash!  Yah, I am dreaming. 

The season of joy & eating...

Is Christmas time!!!  As usual we knock off slightly earlier than usual and celebrated Ms Wong's birthday.   Yah, her wish or is it our wish that we no need to celebrate with her next year.  Haha.. Obviously I said the wrong things and was quoted in her blog till GCC had to inform me that too ;P

I had fun at the celebration even though the journey to the resturant was long and tiring.  Our tour guide, Ms Minah, brought us on a hot and tiring route.  And it is quite embrassing for our Chinese colleague to ask why we go by that route.  Hahaa... Lesson learnt, never bring a forginer out, cos everytime something will go wrong.

By the time I ate this, it was abt 3.30pm.  And we left office at 2pm.  Luckily food is great and this thing is huge!!!

Luckily Sabrina love the food :)

Bimbo loves to bitch ;)

Somehow we got Ms Wong the same cake as last year.  Seems like the annual event to eat this cake.

Happy Birthday!!!

Went home after the late lunch for our very own Christmas party! Enya checking out the food. 

Sis got this nice fruit cake from her hotel

As usual the most happy person is this lady with all the presents :)

We gals got new shades from my brother-in-law :)

The Bimbo finally got married....

2 weeks ago, my bimbotic friend finally got married.  She is the first bimbo friend that I got to know.  Is a surprise that we can be more than colleague.   First impression of her is a CMI girl who twirl her hair during a meeting when whole world was waiting for her response to boss' question.  And best boss was fuming mad then.  Haha.....  She got a bitchy look lah.  So if you only look at her, you may not want to talk to her. 

I can't remember how the 2 of us got along so well.  I guess she surprise me that other than having bitchy and bimbotic look, she also got the brains.  She is the "potatoes" while I am the "sweet potates".   But somehow we can still relate to each other despite the language barrier.  And thanks to her, I am trying very hard to prevent my dear niece to become another "potatoes". 

The 5 years of working together has made us into "friends" (and not just colleague ;P).  Is through work that we got to know each other more.  But I must say my bimbo friend, is more than just a hardworking worker, she is also a filial daughter.  The past few months she also shown me that she is a wonderful partner whom stood by her now husband through the tough time.   So my dear friend, wishing you and Jeff a very blissful marriage.  And may you fulfil your wish to be a Tai Tai soon :)

Ok, now is time for the highlights of the 2 days weddings.  It was like a departmental outing for us till my boss sort of mistaken herself as the mother of the bride.  Hahaa...

The church

 With Tai Tai, Lover and Hilli

With the birde & groom

Dinner at Fullerton Hotel - With Shook Yee and Tai Tai
Thanks to Shook Yee, I got to ride in a BMW again :)  

Queen of Bs looking glam & Minah looking forward to the food :P

A nice shot by someone's atas camera

Time is flying......

Long time never blog and end of the year is coming!!! What have I been doing???  Past few months have been eventful - drama happening at work to at home.  But am glad that things are all settle in a way.

Grandma fell and was warded a few mths ago.  Was grateful for my dear kawans who were the MSW IC.  Of course their attempt to prevent my identity from being exposed is greatly appreciated.  Haha.. now thinking back I find it funny especially when I have to own up and justify to my own boss why my Grandma can't be discharge despite the bed crunch :P  It is definately not fun sorting out your own social issues.  But somehow I manage to do it, am proud of myself.  Only thing that I dread now is CNY.   Another opportunity to see how people wayang...

Got to deal with a few shit cases for the past few months.   All the atas people till I wonder why I am so suay since I am not doing private wards.  Concluded that my life sucks.  Being label as unhelpful MSW is so common these days till I gave up arguing with these people. Can call me whatever you want.  Haha.. I only cannot be "Promising Social Worker" only ;)

Yah, went to Istana that day for the annual President Tea.  This year Promising Social Worker is our dear FRIEND!!!  Hehee... note I am calling him friend now cos he is flying high.  I am hoping that he will head hunt me which he has ignored my request despite me telling him.

Photo with the President since he invites us for tea :)  

I also sort of reflected a bit about why he is Promising and why I am not. Concluded that I must be grateful that boss never sack me since all I do is to tell her that I will die whenever she ask me to study or do something out of the normal duties. Haha... Yah so Promising SW deserve what he gets lah :)

I know I am blessed with a bunch of great colleagues (whom I call them my friends ;P), blacklisters and of course my family.  These are people that keeps me going when life get a little bit tough.  Thanks to them I am still going strong.   I love you guys and thank you for being such great pals!!!  My year end wish is for everyone to be happy and healthy.  May all our life get a little better in the new year :)