Intro to Art History Papers

Honestly, out of the thirty students in my class five of them wrote on Monet's Waterlilies. From 30,000 B.C. to 2012, five of them wrote on the same cliché series?!?!?! I should have prefaced the assignment by saying, "aaaaand no one can do Impressionism, even though I know your parents had some book on Monet and that is the only art you were exposed to or remember."

Lacanian and Freudian perversion

Reading too much psychoanalytic theory makes me suicidal and self-loathing. Am I the one who cannot have a normal relationship of love, platonic, or otherwise? Or is it our boyfriends, Lacan and Freud? In order for me to not want to die, I will just stop thinking about it.

Dear Students,

Someone needs to teach you proper email etiquette and consideration. Stop being wanks.

With frustration,
Your abused TA/professor.

Funny From Riley

"so my companion's nerd friend was driving with his friends, including elder dorny, in his van while eating a subway 1 dollar wrap. to get his money's worth, he got every condiment. it was a really wide wrap. He starts to choke big time, and his eyes bug out, and he start's swerving, and his face turns purple, and his vains swell up. he starts punching his own chest. finally after 30 seconds of choking, he spits out what was stuck and swallows the rest. after finally calming down and getting back with it he quietly and calmly states in a plugged nose nerd voice "uha, i was chokin for a second there." and that was all."

also this happened.

Boys. Girls.

Girl complains about her problems with her roommate. Boy says nice and encouraging things to girl about her roommate. Girl complains about how tired and stressed out she is. Boy says nice and encouraging things to girl about her stress and fatigue. Boy tries to relate to girl about the roommate situation with his own experience. Girl tells him he is a horrible person. Boy talks about his work. Girl talks about how disgusting he is. Boy talks about himself. Girl talks about how he is disappointing to her.

Non-dating, non-married, platonic couple sitting with me at a table in the library. Why is he putting up with such abuse? Why is she so horrible to him? He's just trying to flirt and be nice and she is such a pissy pants.

Braque

thanks dude.

Me oh Mustachehat

Love/Hate Themes

Barack Obama Sr.

Who knew he was a stud?

for a monday night

I had the most beautiful dream about honey bees.

201 Midterm II

"On his breastplate is all sorts of propaganda!"
"the re-retrieval of the Roman article" (the return of the Roman standard)
"decerative"
"contropossesses" (contrapposto)
"speach"
"Cupid, son of Venice" (who doesn't know how to spell Venus?)
"a hugh gold statue" (huge)
"This becoming very influential is sculptor."
"Bob and Georgeinos" (architects of the Parthenon. ha.)
":) oops ~ shoulda studied it more"
"porticoves"
 "The Greeks may has built this..."
"...trinkits such as the Minora."
"Shows the Romans capturing a Jewish god i.e. menorah." (SO EMBARRASSING! Jewish history is our history, dude. Learn it.)

and this little gem. too bad this student didn't study.

Productivity

This is me on a daily basis.

Voltron dans les Coquelicots

ahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahaha

a real friday night

Todd and I went to sushi in SLC last night with my lovely B Dahlin and her date, Ryan Beck. It was absolutely delicious and they were great company. Afterwards, we went to see Verdi's Il Trovatore at the Capitol Theater all dressed up, held hands and had a loverly time. I feel like city lights are magical and I am so excited to move somewhere for our next adventure together.

Logic and reason

Todd after breakfast: ...but I don't want to go to school.
Me: Todd, it's only for one hour.
Todd: Yeah, but you have two boobs.

Death and Faccia-book

So I am contemplating our generation's death and facebook's (as well as other virtual media's) strange role after someone has passed away. How strange it must be for people to have a loved one, a friend, or an acquaintance die. They aren't alive. Their facebook is still visible. Their facebook shows (thanks to instagram and digital imaging) thousands of images of them - they are not that image, but tiny pixels of color on a virtual web of information that make your brain feel like it is looking at that person. And even if it were that person, they are dead. You cannot talk to them, smell them, see them, feel them...but you can still look at their facebook like it was any other day. You can track some of the last moments of their life (i.e. where they "checked in," what they ate if put in their status, who they were with, etc). A boy I went to middle school with died a while ago and so many of his "friends" commented on his wall about how much he would be missed. I suppose I fail to embrace facebook as a viable means of true communication and I definitely don't feel it an appropriate place to say your goodbyes.

Facebook and the internet have changed our society - the way we think, what we do, how we show ourselves to the world, and absolutely how we spend our time. Let's go back to the golden age of the 1990s where internet was slow and only our dad's offices had computers I can't help thinking of Midnight in Paris and my European Primitivism seminar..."let's go back to a simpler age where we weren't so corrupt, yada yada."
I just want someone to delete my facebook when I die. My children or husband should save all of the pictures and then delete it. Sidenote: I was planning on deleting facebook when I got married, when I had kids, when I graduated from college (since it began as a college forum). Facebook has changed Facebook itself. It feels so strange to see the facebook of someone who has died. This is a completely new problem that I didn't even know I had.

It's sunny, Todd's awesome, I love some people

so everything is fine. Thank you Stevie and Uchtdorf.

Some gems from grading.

I am sure that I did not teach some of these things to my students.


"Bizintin (he means Byzantine) as visible by the over stylization of the sheeps coats which are layeral."
"A bird like man sporting a large penis."
"anonomis"
"perpeses" (perpeses is like porpoises and is almost as good as that kid who wrote bowels instead of bowls)  
"We can approximately date because the build-up builds up at a specific rate." (who is teaching these kids, seriously?)
"Signature to the Atruskans the temple shown has one set of stairs that leads to the padio."
"kroisos sculplor" (kouros sculpture, i'm sure)
"formittable" (trés formidable!)
"...showing the vains....to creat a likness of aperson."

Teenage Metro British Pop

I have heard of One Direction before, I'm sure, but I didn't know what they sang or what they looked like until today. I have one question: Who dresses these little boys? (because shoot)  

Party on, Garth.

The workload of graduate school (along with teaching and being a TA) has made me a sedentary homebody. I have been indoors, mainly in my bedroom at my desk, for the past two days straight. Yesterday I went to my office on campus for some hours, but luckily graduate parking lots require less walking than others so do not fear, I did not over exert my weak-a$$ body and I did not socialize more than was necessary. My thighs and arms have never been so loosey goosey, and my skin never so pale.

My Weekend via tumblr.

This

I love Lamp.

I love Todd. He sure knows how to brighten my day. He informed me that I should watch baby videos on Youtube to cheer up.
I'm all about you, you're all about me, we're all about each other.

September 14/15

Last night I made these cookies http://www.ambitiouskitchen.com/2012/09/nutella-stuffed-brown-butter-sea-salt-chocolate-chip-cookies-my-favorite-cookie-ever/ (I don't know how to do fancy links in words things) to take to the movies with Todd. We were supposed to see Sabrina, the old one, but it was sold out. We came home and played Super Smash Bros. After a while I asked if Todd wanted to go out to do something else. We decided to go camping. We took the benches out of our van and made a bed and took food and water and Todd's laptop for watching BBC Sherlock. 

We drove up Squaw Peak trail on a "dirt road" that was really a rock/pothole road. It was out in the boonies and it is necessary to drive super slowly. We had a good four hour sleep, awoke at six am so we could hike what was supposed to be one hour to the top of Provo Peak to see the sunrise. Long story short, it took three hours to get to the top = not enough food or water, we missed the sunrise, it was incredibly steep and full of rock-slide slate-type rocks (so I complained a lot like a good wife), two hours to get down, and a flat tire on the way home on the rock road. Niiiiiiice.

 

At least fall in Utah is wowzer gorgeous. 

tonight

I had dinner at Old Towne Grill in Provo tonight. It's the Madison bar/restaurant. I ate with Madison (Nibley). She is so easy to talk to and so fabulous and beautiful and grown up. We ate outside in the warm air and talked for hours. I needed it.
The Madison sauce is delicious.

Oriental

Sometimes I hate myself for liking Gérôme. He sucks me right into his white, Westernized, romantic and imaginary Orient.

Le Retour a La Raison

Teaching

I just love making my students laugh. I hope they like Art History.

Art History Comprehensive Exam

I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED! Last Friday I took the most difficult-to-study-for test ever. I felt so sick and scared as I was studying, I cried for a day, I had trouble sleeping a couple nights before, but when I took the test I felt really good and today I found out I passed!!!!

Probably due to the twenty-something prayers I said while studying.

tard carmarn

i just adore my husband. he is so funny. he is so cute. he is hilarious in the kind of way that is our sense of humor and the more i laugh the more he laughs and then the more we cry-laugh. he is up-beat. he is thoughtful and gentle and always so excited to see me. he smiles so humongously it is contagious even if i'm in a sorry-for-myself mood. he sings me to sleep when i need him to. he does anything i want/wish/ask...which is perhaps him being the best ever, but i think partially because we love most of the same things. like one night i called him and told him i wanted to go see this band some night and he should get work off and he does and we go and date and it's delightful. he kisses the best kisses. when i'm going about my business in my bedroom he will lift me up and throw me onto the bed (i have come to know that relaxing my body before i hit the bed makes the whiplash hurt less). most of our dates are on a whim and sudden. i love being in the same room as him. he will stay up with me all night to help me finish a paper or prepare for a presentation. he will do anything to help me calm down. when we were first married (and i was a crazy person on crazy pills) and we would fight (because i was a crazy person on crazy pills) i would try to leave the house, but he would hold me and make me talk about my issues and feelings (crazy person/pills), which means that he taught me how to discuss my life rather than holding it in and feeling bad for myself. this is why we're best friends. i tell him everything i think about everything. he's so supportive of my life and my goals and my passions and dreams. i think that they're more like our goals and passions now. every paper he's written since we've been married have been about art history...so we've amalgamated. this is too long now, but he is just the best so i wanted to talk about it.

VS

Retail retail retail. What to do with you. J'adore faire du shopping, but working retail is (as James Swensen would say) another animal completely. These are some things I will not miss about working at Victoria's Secret (only one S. She only has one secret. I hate it when people call it Victoria's Secrets.)

1. Caring about stupid things (like whether someone did or did not complete the Beauty Replenishing Template, leaving marketing out in places where it does not belong, or left too many air bubbles in the window vinyl cling that is crooked)

2. The music that plays (i love the Beach House, Metric and Beegees, but I cannot take anymore Alanis, Chris Brown, Nicki Minaj or Owl City)

3. People who steal (i'm not stupid. i know when you're stealing. i know you're re-selling it. i know that you do it for a living. you're despicable.) 

4. People who return bras (the wire is sticking out because you've worn it every day for a year and wash it in the machine, not because it is defective. it's dirty and gross and i don't want to touch it)

5. People who come in right when we close

6. Needy customers who come in for friendship rather than to shop (i'm sorry, i don't have 2 hours twice a week for you to tell me how much you miss your husband who died 10 years ago.)

7. Minimum-ish wage for maximum effort/stress 

8. Working on Sundays

Reasons I did not quit and will stay on their payroll until I graduate this April

1. Free bras

2. Discount

3. I love the girls I work with

4. Shopping in the backroom

5. Working at Christmastime. It's the most fun.

stardust

I've been listening to Ziggy Stardust (The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars) for the past few days.

an infant really

So I went to the gym. I did weights for half an hour, ran for an hour and fifteen minutes, stretched and rode my bike home. I felt strong and good like I do after I exercise. As I was riding to the stop light on Riverside and State I wanted to get up onto the sidewalk so I could push the button for the crosswalk. I saw the dip of a driveway in the curb and though I noticed it was an inch or two higher than any smooth dip transition I knew it would be fine because on my bike I am always going up and off curbs. I don't know whether it was because I was on Todd's bike and I'm not used to it, if his tires were too full to have any give, or if I just went too parallel to the sidewalk but the bike, in slow motion, toppled over sideways. I heard myself say quietly, "sh*t! ow!" I felt and saw and heard everything in slow motion. I knew I was going to fall. I felt myself falling. I felt my body scrape and slide against the gritty pavement. I sat there in shock for a moment. I felt myself get short of breath. I looked at my hands, bloody and full of tiny pieces of gravel. I knew every car that went by looked at me sitting partially on the sideways bike and the ground. I don't know if it was the surprise and I just felt like an idiot, or if it was because I was genuinely hurt, but I cried nearly all the way home. I really wish Todd was home to take the rocks out of and clean my hands and to feel bad for me. I can't really bare to wash them very well because they're uncomfortable.
This is the second thing that makes me feel just like a helpless, crying child who really wants a mother (or a Todd).
The first one is throwing up from the stomach flu.

e

It became instantly lonely when Megan moved to Arizona.
I remember when Janna moved after a winter semester. We watched It's a Wonderful Life and I hugged her goodbye and cried while Todd drove us home.
Megan has been a presence in my life, consistently nearby for ten years. I feel like I always take my closest friends for granted. When I moved from Bremerton I went to visit Jill and McKinsie nearly every month. Now that we all have jobs and school and are barely scraping by I feel like I can only count on seeing my best friends once a year.
Megan, I miss you. When all I want to do is cancel going to the gym, eat ice cream, paint my finger nails and watch the O.C. I can't call you anymore. You've only been gone a few days and you don't know how many times I have taken my phone from my purse to text you to see if we could do something.
Todd is so busy with work and classes and I had never realized until you were gone. He is gone most of the time too. I sit in my house feeling awkward and not knowing what to do. I have plenty of homework and housework to keep me busy, but that is not fun, nor a top priority. I've already painted my nails, embroidered several onesies, vacuumed, grocery shopped.
I went to call my mom because I like to talk to her when I'm sad, but she is in Australia for weeks.
I don't make plans with the people who do live here because I feel like I should be doing homework...blah blah blah complainy life. end.

When I learn about Edie Sedgwick (Warhol's "Factory Girl") she reminds me of Daisy from the Great Gatsby. 

Both beautiful blondes wanted so passionately by men. Both women always so cheerful, charming, feigning happiness they enchant everyone they come across. Both seemingly deep and exciting when really, truly sad and hollow and confused and scared.

I guess Edie reminds me, too, of Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany's. 

Carmans Carmans and Carmans

So, my boyfriend/husband/loveofmylife Todd Benjamin Carman is one of fourteen children. His parents are in their 60s and are very soft spoken, but kind and loving and fun-loving people. Each Carman child is so different from the rest while having many things in common. I've learned that Todd is probably the craziest/goofiest of the bunch. They are all funny, smart, so welcoming, open and easy to talk to.
We're in Colorado for the week for Todd's older sister, Cristi's, wedding. It's an entire week where nearly all of the siblings have come and we've rented cabins together. Todd and I are sharing with Andy and Brittany and their three beautiful little girls, Debbi, Danielle, and Evan. The other siblings and parents are nearby. We've played games, talked, had a picnic, a hike, a bridal shower, swimming in mountain springs and creeks in the hot sun. I just have fallen more in love with the Carmans. I just adore and admire them. At the shower today I felt so at ease with all of the Carman girls and their in-laws. I don't worry about what they think of me or about what I'm going to say to make conversation. They're just wonderful people who make me feel loved and welcome.
I am so in love with my nieces and nephews. My heart melts when they call me "Auntie Hillary" (or "Auntie Hallowy"). Each and every Carman with children is such a wonderful parent; patient, interested, and loving.
The first time I met Todd's parents, in 2006 when we first began dating, I felt incredibly uncomfortable and felt they didn't like me because they didn't really talk to me. Tonight they both came and sat by me and we talked for at least an hour. I admire them for they way they have raised fourteen incredible children who love their family and care so much for one another. I feel a part of the family. I love to spend time with them and talk to them and get to know them better. I'm proud to be a Carman. I'm happy to have a giant family and feel so much love. I can't wait for my children to feel so much love from so many incredible aunts and uncles and cousins and grandparents.

beechboyz

I once had a dream so I packed up and split for the city.

wyoming/idaho

Annie is Chase's girlfriend. She is living at my parents' house and working at the jewelry store with me for the summer. I adore her. I am so glad I've been able to get to know her by myself when we're alone and the store is slow. She's funny and sweet and kind and beautiful and a lot like Chase. Last night she and I drove to her home/g-ma's home in Swan Valley. The house has a big green lawn, a great big vegetable garden, raspberries, and a chicken coop. Annie, a few of her cousins and I rode horses up the butte beside the house.

The weather was cold, the clouds were dark with bright patches of the sunset in the sky peeked through. It was incredible. It didn't rain until we got to the top and could see the Snake River reflect the sunlight. My horse was gorgeous, red, tall and easy to control. The view was breathtaking with the bright bright sun setting behind the mountains juxtaposed with the dark wispy rain clouds.

I've never loved Idaho so much.

non-current boyfriends.

I had a dream right before I woke up about some ex boyfriends. Jon LF was standing between two vending machines looking away from me and looking the saddest ever and crying a little while Jason Sutton was taking me for a carriage ride around the high school he never graduated from because he was still getting held back.
I guess that's how I sort of remember both of them. One sad. One stupid.

sometimes

i feel like my parents like the other girls that live at my house more than they like me.

Internship Journal i keep for myself (unedited)

April 23rd, 2012

I came to the museum in the morning and the sun was just over the mountains. the museum is set into the hillside up above the highway and above town and set across from the elk refuge. the museum’s exterior looks like it is made of indigenous rocks and fits/matches the landscape in which it is set. everything is quiet, you can’t hear people or cars. The view is beautiful with the bright sun and the yellow grass and the winding stream/river that has perfectly rounded bows as it flows through the elk refuge. Bronwyn Minton, the Assistant Curator of Art, introduced me to everyone we could find. Everyone is so friendly and kind.

My desk is in the library with Bronwyn. The library has this gorgeous wood, wooden cabinets and shelves, a large beautiful wooden table, and dimly lit lights. It feels like someone should be sitting in the leather chairs smoking a cigar. I love it in here.

I worked most of the day with Ron Gessler, the Chief Preparator, as we took down text panels from one gallery, then later more text panels and the actual artworks from another gallery (Kuhn?). It was amazing to handle the actual paintings and sculptures, although it made me the most nervous I’ve ever been. I spent a lot of time in storage watching/helping replace the paintings (Ron calls it “playing tetris”), returning the sculptures (also tetris, or rubiks cube), learning about how he cares for the art, his priorities, how to handle it, etc etc

At the end of the day Ron and I were given sheets of paper with a layout of the new exhibit of Carl Rungius’s art. Each page had a wall (north, south, east, etc) with works and their layout. Ron and I unloaded the artwork from storage and placed each piece in its respective order and corresponding wall. The curator and assistant curator then came in and fixed what didn’t work. They moved so many pieces, cut pieces, and changed their organization a bit. The idea was to have several of Rungius’s oil sketches that correspond to the larger finished canvas. It is really beautiful. One of the paintings I recognize because I grew up with a print in my house.  

201 Finals (first half).

when asked to identify the Mosque of Sultan Selim he wrote, "The Mosque of Satan Sanim." close enough.
when asked to identify the artist (answer Cimabue) people wrote, "Claucious?" "Cladine," "Lorenzo" and "Dupont." None of those names have ever been said in class.
Did you guys know that the "Quu'ran" is written in "Sunscript?" Hahahahahaha. Sunscript sounds like how unicorns would write. Also, it's in Arabic, not Sanskrit, you idiot.

Some other good ones:
"Adornation"
"concidered"
"The page from the Qur'an comes from the Islamic time, where people were not emphasize." (yeah...English is your first language and the Islamic time is still the time)
"portraing"
"the Islams"
"refering"
"This piece makes god more tangable." (this is so irreverent. Capital G God is SO not tangy.)
"Both these two pieces are from different periods. they spent a lot of time on there caligraphy." (clearly more time than you spend on your English/spelling.)
"Piza Cathedral" (hahaha. Pizza is just like Pisa.)
"Guccio" instead of Giotto

fashion and fashion

Today I've been writing a paper since 8:30 am. I took a break for dinner at 7pm and wrote a couple more pages lazily. Anyways, the point I wanted to make was that whilst reading/writing I found this photograph of Lisa Fonssagrives (thought to be the first supermodel, married fashion photographer Irving Penn, etc, etc)...


...doesn't she look just like Giselle?
The answer is yes, she does. It's strange.

ducks and swords

Todd and I were walking on campus to our car this afternoon, just walking like normal, talking, etc., when Todd looks past me and says, "look." I look to my left and search for what he wanted me to look at. I saw a duck on the grass. (it looked like this)


I said, "What? The duck?" Todd looks at me like I'm stupid and waits for me to realize what he was talking about. I look a little to the right of the duck and see this. Then Todd says in his most sarcastic voice, "yeah...the duck!"

Riley's Letter

I got 2 letters in the mail this week from my favorite little Riley! He's on a Spanish-speaking mission in Texas and these are some of the funny things he says to me.

"A kid who was investigating with a fellow missionary when praying at the end of the lesson said, 'Dear Josef Smif, is da book of Ja Normans twue (tawoo)?'"

"This hispanic guy said to elder Rodriguiez 'Que Dios le benediga, foo!' (God bless you, foo)"

"We had this guy we were teaching who didn't learn our names, but when at church he said he was studying with el guero y el otro gero chaparrito (the white guy and the other short white guy)."

cute boys

Sometimes Todd just talks to make noise, but sometimes it turns out so cute.
"Hillary, I am the way that I am...because I was born in love with you. So...we can have babies and live forever and go to Never Never Land. Togetherland."

Healthy Snacks

Cheetos* and pizza* and white chocolate* are my favorite foods.














*foods that make me feel sick after i eat them

mmmmm grading midterms (part one million)...

"You can find simmilarities between them when you can also find differences."
"...because of the softness of his demenior."
"He has his brestplate on. a brestplate is for war, he is ready for war."
"...they are rulers, so they do want to be seemed as great."
"[I liked] Sophia. Because of how well she is represented and the desire to make it a work that stand out and represents her." (talking about the Byzantine church, Hagia Sophia. Hagia Sophia means "Holy Wisdom" and is not even a little bit like a person)
"The Greeks no longer had the yearning to show their abilities to rationalized."
"Alexander has only ahed" (they meant "a head")
"His hair is wild and supposed to look like a main"
"portraite"
"Both are very simbolic."
"wihile"
"greate"
"stapel"
"He has a calm face and not many expressions." (yeah...he only has one expression...he's a statue...)
"heroicness"
"presense"
"He stretchies out his hand..."
"He is seen waving lleading the people iw his hand" (these tests are hand-written. not typed.)
"drappery"
"starring off"
"The drapery is textualized"
"The look on afterlife at this time was exciting."
"A man and women are laying down with one another." (womAn. Just one.)
"deiry"...or "cleiry" (either way i can't tell what it means.)
"deemons"
"singlely"
"Domanice" (domanice? you mean dominance. you're dumb.)
nearly every student uses "there" when they mean "their" (go back to 3rd grade)
"They more so seek for comfort."
"solice"
"exitement"
"They had weapons for protection and vases with wine for fun."
"worcs"
"The way it shows it power is..."
"The earth had a positive vision of the afterlife." (the earth did? or everyone on the earth did? either way...wrong.)
"formerly" (meant to write "formally")
"narative"
"The Etruscans were a jumpy people who invested effert & resources into the commemeoration of the dead."(spelling. also, jumpy?)
"...one of the panel..."
"sacrophagus"
"pleniful"
"It tells a duel story." (I wish it did! Dual isn't nearly as funny.)
"Another way bothe erras showed there power..." (mmm, combining "both" and "the" sure saves time.)
"acrctictoral" (aaaaahahahahaha. just soooouunnd it out.)
"One of the simmilarities is MATH. Yes, I said it! Math makes these spectacular!" (no need to get cheesy now.)
"beauity"
"Panthenon" (it is a cross between Parthenon and Pantheon in hopes one of them is correct and I mark them right.)





Someone said the "Collosium" is in Greece. If there is one piece of architecture anyone knows it is that the Colosseum is in Rome! RIGHT?!?!?! Hasn't anyone seen Lizzy McGuire? Or Olsen Twin movies? Or Carmen San Diego? The Bourne Identity? Postcards? Photographs? Parents who teach things?

Blood Letting

So I went to donate blood today and this lovely silly guy named Jonathan did my physical, drew my blood, etc.
Jonathan said, "This is a difficult question...what is your gender?"
I looked at him for at least 7 seconds, then laughed and said, "Female..."
I told him that that is probably an offensive question for people who look ambiguous. He said some people do get offended and won't answer him, but will say, "What do you think I am?" to which he simply replies, "It doesn't matter what I think, I need to hear you say it."
Aaaannyway, I have changed my last name since the last time I donated blood and I told Jonathan it was due to a sex change.
Also, did you know that you can legally change your date of birth? Neat, huh? I would do it if I were born on leap year/day.
I took cookies and a peanut butter chocolate bar. Best blood donation snack of my life.

a letter from Riley

"So the new elder in the ward, elder Barker told me about this one time in the mtc when everyone was in line for the showers, and this guy bolts out of his shower as he is struggling to cover himself with his towel, and he's just gone in a second. Elder Barker goes into his shower because he was next in line, and the shower was still running, and there was a turd on the floor."

I'm really worried.

"We know the Greeks as the culture of the invention of the mathematics." (don't you know anything about the mathematics?)
"...the context of pleasure not funerary."
"...by completely doing away with the clothes."
"...it evolved to not include the archaic smiles."
"...culture that focused on builting temples..."
"this culture was borrowed however especially...."
"The Greek world was heavily influncd by Egypt."
"contro-pusso" (this is getting inappropriate. also we're not to classical greek/contrapposto yet.)
"Egypt had the spinx, the mythological minotaur" (FAVORITE!)
"extragent architecture"
"incorperate"
"Another different they make are their permanance."
"Many of the works are created." (who taught this person sentences? all works are created!)

Grading Midterms Part II (I don't make these sentences up)

"People began to learn about knew things."
"In Paleolithic times man were at a hunter-gatherer stage."
"Agriculture became a staple of sustinance."
"Caves are a temperry shelter."
"A cave in France which has numerous animal imagery in it."
"The Paleolithic need to survival by hunting."
"Artwork was inconvenient."
"Paleolithic was a time of practicalness, nomadic and movement." (dear old Paleolithic was a time of nomadic!)

(these next five are from the same test)
"This people were very based on survival."
"They never did anything too perminent." (just a little permAnent)
"Stonehenge on the other hand, even though in the same time period." (hahaha. what?)
"They were focussed on staying in one place."
"They used this huge stones to build a calendar." (thems hurr stones'll done it)

"In slide one their are work was more on survival."
(this next one is a doozy)
"Paleolithic they started to only used symbolic magic so they could hunt and most of their peices were portable with the neolithic since they stayed in one place and started to have agriculture it gave them the opportunity to make their work bigger."
"Here neck is elogated" (he meant "her" and "elongated" i'm pretty sure)
"...focus on other things in there art...."
"Art and architecture in the Ancient Greek World were the to most influenced aspects from the World around them but were taken into acount that the facsinations of the cultures differed."
"The 'kouros' is nude. His body is chizeled." (ahahahaha)
"The body is free and away (the limps have room to move)." (i wish my limps could move)
"archetectual" ... "archatecture" (he tries a new spelling each time)
"pnedures" (no one knows...maybe pendentives?)
"intracete sculpture"
"...made the decorations there own."
"...depicting humale males in the nude..." (humale males?)
"As they traded with these countries they were influenced by their and resources as we can tell by the art."
"simetric"



the new generation = GOLD MINE!

Art History 201 midterms

"Both show power and strengthin asmall yet apparent way, they stylized beards."
"His knee muscles in particular in delineated."
"...by introducing diagonal lines and broken registars..."
"They are also showing size by being bigger than others." (haha. this one might be my favorite.)
"importancey"
"Both rulers are pertrayed with Good Strong Bodies"
"...their is no Angle to him..."
"In slide #4 the male has the drapped crown..." (wtf is the drapped crown?)
"...to show his power and authority in conquiring."
"Both ther illustrate leadership...He is not large or overfed..." (hahaha. good one.)
"Menenkaure to me earns my respect." (good to know, chum.)
"Slide 4 shows it through his pharaonic atire"
"...left foot foreward."
"hiarchy of scale"
"The statue will last for along time."
"The bodies are somewhat riggid."
"They both have a stylized beard to reshow that they have power."
"There is a great change in the dynamics of the two civilization."

Blood.

Paris is Burning

this is my friend, todd.

These are a few pictures of Toddmyfavorite.

One at our friend, Julia's, wedding.


One where he was with Riley in SLC running around being a kid.


And one with our little niece, Frankie. She is also called Franks and Beans or Frankenstein.


These are just because he is so cute.

Like Magellan

Todd and I went to the library to study for tests and catch up on research...but what was much more fun was deciding where we were going to go to school and move to next! (I admit it's a little silly to not study for exams that you will need to do well on in order to get into said schools...but whatever)
I found a great list of schools across the United States that have PhD programs in Art History (because other than Todd and sunshine it is the best thing in life) while Todd made a list of all of his potential schools with Physician Assistant programs. We compiled our lists (consisting basically of the west and east coasts) and highlighted the ones that had both programs!
I could probably be happy anywhere. The Bay Area and San Fran sound good. I could do L.A. probably. Seattle, Portland...Rhode Island, there are a million in NYC. I decided if we went to Idaho (not ideal for living), my family in Wyoming and Todd's in Oregon, we would be right in the middle and traveling to visit would be pretty easy.
I am just so excited. Right now we're thinking about maybe possibly wanting to try for a wee one after I graduate with my Master's in April 2013, moving to a new city where Todd can start his PA program and I can move us in, decorate our little home, nest and relax, take a year or so off from school and if I want (/it will probably be necessary for me) to work I can try teaching Art History at some college until the little one is born.
I can go for walks exploring the city, paint the walls, paint furniture I find for free on craig's list, embroider little onsies, learn to crochet little booties, for once in my life I could actually prepare meals (and maybe be proud of them), our friends and family could come visit. We can find our favorite restaurants and walk around the alive city at night. I just love talking about the future with Todd and all of the exciting things we're going to do. We're going to make fun of how dumb/silly babies are, and teach them how to speak. We're going to explore together and it's going to be oh so fun.

say it to my FACE b*tches!

i get anxiety when confrontation is happening anywhere around me. sometimes our neighbors scream at each other and my heart races. sometimes i can tell todd is about to yell at strangers (when he gets road rage) and i panic and tell him to stop. today i posted how sad i was about the Dave Ackerman - What BYU Students Know About Black History Month or whatever it's called (it is really disappointing because he made it, because of the answers shown, and because now everyone will hate BYU/mormons more than they already do). aaaaanyways, i posted that on my facebook and one acquaintance/fb friend wrote how "it makes sense since the mormon church has considered black people equals for 34 years" and then one of my mom's friends/fb friend said something about "joseph smith helped black people...blah blah." the acquaintance and my mom's friend don't know each other. that little start of a fight/confrontation on my fb page gave me anxiety.
tonight heidi and i taught a 201 review session where the projector didn't work for the first 20 minutes and some 8 students sat on the floor because there were not enough desks. i received several emails (some to the professor and some to the TAs) only minutes and hours from this review session complaining about the room size that they couldn't see, about the images that didn't work until part way through, and how the review session was counter productive.
counter productive? really? i taught you absolutely nothing about what was going to be on your test? nothing about what to look for? i didn't give you all the answers on a silver platter, only without images? look it up on your own computer! look at them in the text book! why is it my fault the projector won't work? why didn't you sit at the front of the classroom so you could see?
i will book a larger room next time. i already came 30 minutes prior to make sure the computer worked and the projector was set up and it still took longer than that. i'm sorry.
i get defensive when i feel attacked. also it really bothers me that people say things via email, facebook, every other technology that they would never say to your face. why can't we all just be conscientious about everyone else's feelings?
the mean comments people write on youtube videos would make me cry/die and never show myself again if people wrote those things about me.
long enough post. needless to say i deleted my fb for now and i know only my friends read my blog and care about my feelings. unlike ungrateful ARTHC201 students.

waking up

This morning I woke up and was trying to quietly get out of bed so I didn't wake Todd. I was searching the bed and beside the bed for my cell phone and he stirred and asked what i was looking for. I said, "my phone," and Todd said in a sad and worried voice, "it ran away...it ran away to go to art school in New York. Where is he going to live? It's expensive to live in New York..."

nightmare

I had a dream that I went through my pregnancy, like I remember conceiving and then I was about 6 or 7 months along, and in my dream I actually felt how it would feel to sit down and not be able to lean forward because you have a baby/basketball on your lap. When I was only a couple months away from giving birth I realized that I had been taking birth control the entire pregnancy and we were going to have a still born. I couldn't stop crying.

bodyimage

me complaining about my body.

todd saying that me complaining about my body is like the iron chef thinking he's a crappy cook.

Todd (mostly sleeping and talking)

This is Todd after he's been asleep for a few hours when he stirs and wakes just a little.

Hillary nudges Todd a little because he is basically pushing her off the bed.

Todd: Then I'll move for a half dollar.

H: A half dollar?

T: Fifty cents. Fifty. 50 Cent is a rap artist.
(a few seconds later he sits up) What am I going to do with these orange peels? What am I sleeping on?!?!? It's HOT!

H: Todd, sweetie, lay down.

T: (Todd cradles Hillary's head and looks at her sincerely) Hill, would you still love me even if I wasn't a millionaire?

H: ...

T: I knew it! You're just in it for my millions!
...My millions of sexy!!!!