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Credits
©Glamouresque. |
Thursday, June 28, 2012
one of those random nights many many many many many thoughts my head weighing on heart where do i spill this heart? few few few few few few words oh words they aren't coming out of my mouth stand when trails arise love unceasingly, unconditionally, loyally, faithfully. behold.. the awkward moment when you judge yourself when you talk about not judging others. the awkward moment when people said you're weird thereafter said they're just kidding. the awkward moment when everything around you seems so right but feels so wrong. Living with mirrors inside, every tinge of imperfection and flaws kills me before they reaches your naked eyes. because i expect this much from myself, when i fall, the concrete floor breaks before i do. Today is beautiful. Sunday, June 3, 2012
This is me I look at my blog entries and i go ewww, what's all this self pity shit all about? when i looked in the mirror, i don't know who she is I go to work, eat, breathe and sleep. Everyday and night, i try to keep myself alive by not jumping off the ledge some nights, i cry myself to sleep because it pains me to live I don't know how long this is going to last, i don't know if God is still real but i choose to believe He is even though He remained silent. please know that if i ever leave, it's not what i expect life to be. i hope i'd be forgiven for being weak. i tried. believe me i have. If i hadn't i'd be a bloody irritating bitch calling all my friends to sob at. Although i wished i knew how to be one... but those words just went silent whenever my mouth wants to speak. looking for listening ear warm hugs non-judgemental hearts i'm sorry for being such a self pity bitch right here right now i don't like this side of me and i have been trying to look at the positive side for the longest time. it's just not working lately. |
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