Is This All?

Sometimes the desires in your heart are greater than what you can seem to physically attain. Sometimes getting from A to B is harder than it sounds because after you take one step towards B you lose confidence or wonder why you are doing what you are doing.
Wandering aimlessly in your mind never being able to settle can cause us to lose heart or to even wonder if we are obeying what God has called us to do. Others come alongside you and say, "what you are doing has worth, you are doing excellent!" Their words are heard but sometimes you still feel like something is missing.

This has been a struggle in my heart for some time now. We love our home, our job, and our friends, but I find myself asking, "is this all? I know that God has created me for more. Where am I falling short?" Being 37 years old, I don't feel old, but my life seems to be passing me by. Is it wrong to feel that there is more in life? I don't want the fancy car, the huge house, or vacations at 5 star hotels. I just want to live according to what God has called me to do. Maybe along the way of getting on God's course for your life you have to have some pit stops along the way.

Leaving Africa was hard. Coming back to America...harder. It has been almost 4 years now since we returned and the reverse culture shock has been more than we could have ever imagined. Those missionaries that preceded us told us of the struggles, but until you live them you can't understand. Fitting in can be hard. Finding your place. Feeling like you belong again. Fervently praying that your kids will adapt and not be too different to fit in. Many friends have reached out to us and walked with us through some trying times. Although they may not have always understood what we were saying or feeling they were there. Going from being a missionary in Africa to a school teacher can seem to some like a step down. To me, I see it the same, different people group, different culture.

I wonder how many people out of the 7 billion people on earth feel like they are missing something in life. I wonder how many people feel that they were created for more but can't get there. What would we be willing to surrender and risk in order to be obedient. I was reminded this morning in worship that are are called to obedience. We have jobs to make a living but we are to be obedient to the Lord because He will provide for us. The Lord gently whispered to me, "Joy, what if I called you back overseas?" The tears welled up in my eyes and I began to run through the logistics of school, college, packing, and if we ever did return. The thoughts were overwhelming then the word blared in my pounding head...FAITH. We are called. We are called to serve where He has planted us. Right now, it is Texas. Next year, it may be Texas or around the world. But today, I choose to look around to serve and love as Christ has loved me. Stop worrying about more. Stop worrying about being the best mom, teacher, father, coach...OBEY and do everything as if doing it for the Lord. Jesus commands us not to worry. So I choose to abide in peace and to cease striving after the wind.

The road is not easy. The world will tell you that you need another certification and another job and another promotion. What truly matters is Jesus. He created you for a purpose. Live that purpose and that charge with passion and with love.

"Let all that you do be done in love," 1 Corinthians 16:14

"Whatever  you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men..." 

Colossians 3:23

“Worthy are You, our Lord and our God, to receive glory and honor and power; for You created all things, and because of Your will they existed, and were created.”

Revelation 4:11

Justice

My students at the school have been diligently working on an essay about a time that they had to overcome a barrier in their lives. For some, it was quite simple to pinpoint that one time in their lives when they had to push through and overcome. For others, it was quite a struggle. The struggle to choose a specific time when they had to overcome. Another perspective of the fight was putting the deep groanings of their heart on paper and truly illustrate their desire to continue to overcome. The essay that pricked my heart came from a student that has overcome many obstacles, and yet he has challenged me. I pray that his words are an encouragement and a challenge to all who read it.

Justice

 Justice is punishing what is wrong and rewarding what is right.  In God's sight, justice is punishing sin and rewarding the righteous.

 When you have justice, you have something to fight for.  I started fighting for God when I came to the U.S. from Ethiopia, which is located in the horn of Africa.  While I was fighting for God, I faced many temptations.  I went through scary things:  visions, dreams, and I had tough choices between right and wrong.  The temptations I faced were jealousy, lying, stealing, and so much more.  The scary things (visions and dreams) are when I saw the devil in my dreams and visions that happened when I am about to fall asleep. The choices were even harder for me because whatever I thought was right turned out to be wrong.  When I was going through these hard times I prayed to God that He would help me out of these temptations, scary things, and tough choices.  

 Another thing that happens when you are fighting for God is that you will struggle with sin.  Sin is what God hates, but He already defeated sin.  When I sin I just ask God for forgiveness so I can start a new chapter.  Sometimes when I do something bad and I know I am in big trouble, I just feel like I am in some kind of darkness because I think about what my punishment is and what God would do to me.  Another thing is I'll start having a bad feeling about what I did and why I did it.  Darkness and bad feelings become a habit when I sin big against somebody.  The only thing I can ask God is that I'll get out of this mess that I made and that He will forgive me.  

 After God was helpful by helping me out of the mess I was in and forgave me, everything went easy for me because God was with me and He was being helpful.  Then I began to have joy because God was working through me and I felt His helpful hand on me.  Then, finally everything was peaceful because God made it and God had already won the battle and I don't have to worry about it.  

 In conclusion, a barrier that I face daily is being tempted to sin.  When you are fighting for God the devil tries hard to destroy you, but God is in charge of the devil.  Sin cannot stop me from fighting for God because God has already destroyed sin and God is powerful.  When you are fighting for God, He is helpful, strong, kind, graceful, and He gives you blessings and freedom.  

 Justice is punishing what is wrong and rewarding what is right.  In God's sight, justice is punishing sin and rewarding the righteous.  

*used by permission of the student author