I birthed my son and the next 12
months of my life I was playing catch-up. I was like a runner in a relay race
and I just. Couldn’t. Quite. Get that baton.
My hand was outstretched, it was
within my reach…And then the baby woke up four times during the night and I was
half a lap behind.
I caught up again. Almost there…And
then the baby started teething and needed to be held all day. Every day. For a
week. And then I was another lap behind.
And then that precious, chubby little
cherub turned one. And a switched flipped. And he slept. He slept all night.
And he slept well for naps. AND I COULD BREATHE AGAIN! Hallelujah! Praise to
the universe!
That said…
I now have a toddler instead of a
baby. And my life is regaining structure. I’d love, love, love for
blogging/journaling to reenter my life in some sort of a permanent way. It’s
therapeutic for me. It’s record keeping, memory keeping and life-sharing
because I just don’t have the time, patience or discipline to sit down
old-school and write it in a spiral notebook anymore.
So I’m picking up! Every Monday
morning I work. From an actual office, in real clothes. And I take showers beforehand!
The goal is to spend a small portion of that in-my-cubicle, baby-less time to
write a blog post (even if it’s super short!).
So. Monday morning. Here we go!
Jack is active. He keeps me busy. And
tired. All the time. And I love it. I love him. He runs and laughs and cries
and crawls up the stairs and falls and scrapes his knees and gives hugs and
kisses. He is my life and my all and God has gifted me BEYOND MEASURE and
beyond what I deserve with this little ball of energy and curiosity and
nighttime cuddles.
I work one morning a week at my
pre-baby job. A truncated version of what I used to do; H.R. at a small Civil Engineering
office. I could do it form home…probably. But mama needs to take a step back
every now and again. Amiright?
I’m traveling a lot these days. My
parents are in Idaho and we take jaunts as often as we can to see them. My mom
is struggling. Her memory is quickly fading. Quickly. It’s been happening for
years, but in the last several months it’s deteriorated further. My sister,
brother-in-law and their three kids resigned from Wycliffe and moved from New
Guinea to Idaho to be with my parents. So I try to take Jack out to see them as
often as possible; because a) I want to give my mom as much time with him as
possible before she loses more, and b) because growing up a missionary kid,
it’s more than important - it’s VITAL - that Jack be well traveled and know
what it means to see other places and be familiar with something outside of his
local comfort zone. I don’t want it to be anything magnificent or
out-of-the-ordinary for him to jump on a plane. I want it to be normal, craved,
loved.
I’m a stay at home. I wish I had more
to talk about than my kid. But really…that’s all I do. I don’t really have time
to watch the news, form opinions (or even think about) current events, or talk
about things that don’t involve naps, poop or the best kinds of baby sunscreen.
I wish I was more interesting. But in
five years, I’m guessing I’ll be able to look back on this non-interesting mom
blog and smile with delight, re-living my completely non-interesting life about
non-interesting things and be totally enthralled in my completely interesting
first few years as a mommy.
…And I feel like I’ll end up
unapologetically posting pictures of my kid…So…I unapologize for that…
