We can't afford to fuck up now!

But when do we ever do things that we're supposed to?

I need to stop writing on tables and skin and walls and just stick to paper and books.

You can't hurt me with the things that you do,
I'll pick up dandelions and I'll give them to you.

Goodbye waves and Driveways

www.banksy.co.uk

My new role model.
This guy is a genius.

*

My birthday's coming soon.
I still don't know what I want.
Help me out?

*

The Ryder Cup is on teevee in my house almost 24/7.
I think Sergio Garcia is kickass.

Touchdown Turnaround

I sensed a division amongst the ranks today at my grandmother's house.
I could tell because of all the screaming.

No duh, I am such a genius.

But anyway, it's weird to see them fighting because they usually are so bonded over the critisizing of us kids or where to eat lunch or whatever.
It's pretty annoying.
But it's quite sad now that they made each other cry.

Cousin X was giggling behind his magazine.
I nudged him with my toe.
Not funny lah you.
He giggled somemore and made a face.

*
I poked you.
pokepokepokepokepokepoke
And then I laughed.
Because I am amused by weird things.
And because you are cute when you pout.
(:

*

I'd like to say we're okay.
But are we?

What do we have if we don't have each other?

I make mixtapes everytime I'm upset.
So I can be found at the computer burning ceedees whenever anything screws up.

And here I am just adding another to the stack.

Reinventing your exit

Now come one, come all
To this tragic affair
Wipe off that make up
What's in is despair
So throw on the black dress
Mix in with the lot
You might wake up and notice
You’re someone you're not

-The End, My Chemical Romance
*

If you'll be my star, I'll be your sky.

IF YOU LIKE TO TALK FOR HOURS, JUST GO AHEAD NOW! (:
*

I studied today!
Somebody give that girl a prize!

You give me something to sleep to

*One noteworthy thing: I cut my hair.

The tractor, lorry and leech went out with the Dancing Llama on saturday!

Darooo: Did you see that show? Like...small man or something.
Clara: Little man you mean.

We rushed around to places, were lazy and took a cab and..."danced".
We screamed about stupid things and came up with theories from what kind of coffee we drink.
And then we spent ages figuring out how to split the bill for dinner.

Ohhhhh, we had fun (:

*

Tommorrow is B35t135' birthday!
OOOOOH.
LEGO BAG!

It's my birthday in exactly 2 weeks.

Whispers hello, I miss you quite terribly

We were so busy being bored of the mediocrity that is life.
And then we get hit in the face by this.
I'm worried that this time we won't just scrape by, and get to sit and laugh about it later, like "Oh shit, that was close."
Please prove me wrong.

Are you even listening?

Or maybe we ARE all alone after all.

*
A random thought.
I have this sudden weird urge to wear heels.
Must be that article in National Geographic that I read.
Shoes are sexy.
But damn it, it's not like I need any more height.
*
Another random thought.
It's 19 days to my birthday.

Red light, can't stop, so I spin the wheel

I think I have been living in a happy bubble.
My happy bubble now has a big hole in it.

Give me some gum or a plaster or something.
Quick.


So what have we learnt today Taina!

*I need to show care and concern for people.
Yeah, I do feel for people when they tell me about the crappy stuff that's happening to them.
And I really want to help, but I don't know how.
And I kinda figured that words wouldn't really help any.
And if I go like "How are you doing? Are you okay?"
They'll be all " No duh, Taina. I feel like shit."
But I guess it matters. Nobody knows if you care unless you SHOW them that you do.
I think I'm a bit dense. *slaps forehead*
Really.

*I need to talk.
About things that actually matter.
Not about random shit that people don't really want to hear when stuff is serious.

*I now know that I appear to be devoid of normal human emotions.
It's weird.
Like if I get hurt, I don't expect anyone to care and be all "Are you okay?!"
But they do.
So I guess I need to do the same for other people.

*I need to come up with proper responses.
I do hear what people are saying.
But sometimes I get all, uh shit. What do I say now? Crappp, I must answer, quick.
So I come up with something weird like "I feel like eating bagels." or ...whatever.
Which is SO not the correct thing to say.

THINK. What would a normal person do?
And work from there.

*

I'm sorry I'm a bit neh.
NEHNEH AND LOUSY.

I'm going to try to do something about it, promise.

I'm here, I'm now, I'm ready

I felt for sure last night
That once we said goodbye
No one else will know these lonely dreams
No one else will know that part of me
*

"It's sandy." she complained, mulitiple times.
The b35t135 rolled their eyes.
"For god's sake, Clara, it's all your fault cause you cut your bloody jeans into the ugly shorts that they are."

And so the four of them had their retarded picnic on the breakwater.

ONE honey glazed chicken, ONE big bottle of Apple juice, ONE fried fish thing, ONE jar of peanut butter and chocolate swirly thing [the chocolate part is EW], 300g of picnic ham, ONE loaf of bread, ONE chocolate cake.

I reached into my bag and emerged with a fistful of plastic cutlery which Eva grabbed from Carrefour.
[ "Let's go, the woman EYY!-ed me!" ]

Egan apparently was the only one skilled at peeling the chicken.
We are a hopeless bunch of people.
I didn't dare touch the chicken after I nearly consumed what Egan informed me was the butt.
THE BUTT!

Roxygirl was super screamy yesterday.
I demonstrated how loud she can scream when you poke her.
[It's very loud]

It rained.
I guess the one thing we can be grateful about the IMF is that they had big huge tents built outside the Esplanade.
For god knows what reason.

Va and Ra were screaming that it was hot.
But then it was cold.
I swear I thought the whole tent was going to blow off.

The security guard hates us ):

*

We were discussing in the library why Roxygirl felt the need to give Photo-smiles sometimes in pictures.

I'm glad I can say that I almost always give real smiles, if the picture requires it.

Just think of something funny that the person you're taking the picture with did with you!

I looked eeyer yesterday ):

Clara's photo-smile on display!

*

All the shops were closing. And I felt like saying, screw the whole idea of going home.

I had twenty bucks. That could probably last me...3/4 of a day? Haha.

But I stayed quiet and you waited for the bus with me.

And I got on number 14 which brought me back.

*
It was my turn to decide
I knew this was our time
No one else will have me like you do
No one else will have me, only you

Gifts and Curses

Enneagram Type Four is called the Individualist.

The desire to create and seek meaning is emphasized in the Individualist. They are emotionally driven, passionate people, who want to be recognized as special and distinguished from others. They are, at their best, compassionate, empathetic, and refined. This often leads them to artistic endeavors of various sorts, or alternatively, to relationships that would bring them intense feelings whether sublime or despairing. On the flipside, their emotional turbulances and excess fantasizing can cause difficulties with living in the moment, rather than in the past or in the future, chronic dissatisfaction and depression, and conflicts with others.

[This isn't very good is it?]

Type 4w5 :brings profound creativity and insights of the intrapsychic sort. Their emotions are more under-the-surface than 4w3's, and more private modes of communication (such as writing) are preferred.


They fear ordinariness.

Johnny Depp, Kurt Cobain, Bob Dylan.
Amazing.

-2.14 am

Times square can't shine as bright as you

It's kinda scary because the lyrics for
WELCOME TO THE BLACK PARADE
kinda fit

Gaffar: OH YEAH. STEVE IRWIN DIED. LIKE,TODAY!
Everyone: Oh my god. Are you serious?
Gaffar: Yep. Killed by a sting ray or something.
Everyone: *serious expressions* Oh....That is so sad.
Egan: Crikey mate.

I am lousy because I laughed like mad then.
Because I mean, think about it.
It is pretty hilarious.

Poor Steve ):

Carry on
We'll carry on
Though your dead and gone
believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're broken
and defeated
You're weary widow marches on
*

Okay. So math is not really my thing.

But taking pictures on the table is.

Welcome to The Black Parade

Eva : WE ARE BESTIES! B35 ... ah,whatever.

WE ARE B 3 5 AH WHATEVER! :D

EVA L = EXCELLENT/EROTIC LORRY
[ Clara: Who said you were excellent! SHOULD BE EROTIC]
TAINA T = TINY/THUNDERING TRACTOR
[Clara: Thundering makes you sound fat]
CLARA L = CARNIVOROUS LEECH
RENNY I = RIGHTEOUS IGUANA
BEAT W = BEAUTIFUL WALRUS
SHIANG NEE = SENSIBLE NAKED-MOLERAT

Beatbeat couldn't come to Renren's yesterday ):
The REST of us were very very naughty kids...
HAHAHA.
Goodness.

And then we made fun future plans.
How we would rent a house together and we'll always be forgetting to pay bills, and how that would cause our electricity to be cut off, and we'll end up sitting in the dark.
And how we'll always be like SHIT.WHO USED THE LAST TOILET PAPER ROLL or WHO ATE THE LAST EGG.
Stuff like that.
GOD. I love these people.

*



God, I miss the old My Chem.
But still, I'm looking forward to The Black Parade.

THIS IS A RANT. WHOO HOO

Curiousity killed the cat?
How about... curiousity made kittens.
*
Eva was like, hey, it's that girl.
GOSH, that girl is pathetic, is she not?
*

I HAVE A STAR SO YOU CAN'T BRING ME DOWN.

"DAT SINGER CANT SING AT ALL!!!!!
walau
i was like complaining the whole songs she sang lar...even the powerpuff girls song oso cnt sing
wad de hell lorr"

How about we have a lousy sound system?
And how about singing is the only thing I feel I am capable of doing sometimes, and doing well?
I know I can sing, so shut up.

Oh, and do us a favour and go improve your english.

But for every bad comment, there are ten good ones.
Thank you everyone (:

*
AND FOR THE 1287572516th time, I AM NOT TRYING TO LOOK LIKE PAUL TWOHILL.
HE IS NICE AND ALL, BUT I AM A GIRL.
WHO GOES BY THE NAME OF TAINA TERAVAINEN.
I AM NOT HIM, I AM NOT RELATED TO HIM, I AM NOT TRYING TO EMULATE HIM.
SO DON'T act like you know me, and say "eeyer, that girl ishh shoo poserr ones. Try shoo hard to look lyk paul. PAULL ROXXZZ MANZZ."

It's called CLOTHES, I wear what I want, the way I want.
I ALWAYS HAVE DRESSED LIKE THIS.
And my hair has looked like this BEFORE TWOHILL.
Okay?
Go read my back entries, there are probably pictures when I first cut my hair.

MY GOD.
I AM THIS CLOSE TO RUNNING AROUND THE HOUSE, SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS.

I think I will cut my hair this week.
Because I am this close to crying.
If anyone makes another comment, if anyone on the road stares and points again, I think I will snap.
But the problem is I want to grow it long.
So I think I will.
I just have to tolerate you people a tiny bit longer.

*

I had fun talking to Andre, CARA and Elton Loh last night!

Let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings!

CYANIDE! At Teachers' Day Performance


When I met Eva this morning,she looked like...
A beatle.
You know, like the band.
eee, I know.

Abby gave us both RED ROSES WITH THE OUTERMOST PETALS DYED BLACK. Sooooo preeeeetty.
!!!
Sadly it fell apart by 11.
Beauty is shortlived.

I said pretty please. And they said okay. So I got a gold star that followed me around all day long. I asked mommy CAN I KEEP IT? CAN I CAN I? She said yes, but only if I'm responsible for the happiness of my star.

My nehneh girl.

NEE + RENREN SHOOO COOLX WORHHZZ!

Eva didn't understand that she only had to cover her mouth. She said she wanted to hide.

*

I said the world could be burning til there's nothing but dark blue