This time tomorrow where will we be
On a spaceship somewhere sailing across an empty sea
This time tomorrow what will we know
Well we still be here watching an in-flight movie show
I'll leave the sun behind me and watch the clouds as they sadly pass me by
Seven miles below me I can see the world and it ain't so big at all
This time tomorrow what will we see
Field full of houses, endless rows of crowded streets
I don't know where I'm going, I don't want to see
I feel the world below me looking up at me
Leave the sun behind me, and watch the clouds as they sadly pass me by
And I'm in perpetual motion and the world below doesn't matter much to me
This time tomorrow where will we be
On a spaceship somewhere sailing across any empty sea
This time tomorrow, this time tomorrow

This Time Tomorrow, The Kinks

on the last day of 2007, it seemed fitting that i should post something on this space that at last count, has somehow been witness to almost 5 years of my existence. thats practically an eternity if you ask me, where to find such utter love and devotion these days =P

muahaha.

but this year i would like to say that i am so damn grateful for all the people who matter. (you lot all know who you are lor hohoho as if i need to say =P)

happy 2008 everybody!

i have lots of things to say. which i want to record down here so that i wont ever forget owing to the fact that i have the memory space of a teeny-tiny goldfish. muahaha.

this year i got my very own 2am christmas day violin concerto. MUAHAHA yes i rock. ok fine its not even my talent but who cares its for me so same thing. =P (ok even though i sniggered alot i was absolutely floored. really. i would have wept buckets but i am very macho k. but YOU are seriously the best, thank you.)

ya la i know i look very eeyer and obiang in the picture but not the point k! there werent more flattering photos. pfft.

but! who cares i get new solos on demand whenever i want. hohohohoho as if.

anyways! in other news, sydney was absolutely lovely. (omg the beautiful people. faint faint.) the dreaded day of reckoning didnt turn out to be quite so dreadful. christmas was fantabulous. clubbing during christmas season is god-awful. (short people just get slapped around by the taller smelly ones hohoho) oh and i love everybody. (yes the festive season turns me into a sappy sentimental git. im worse than an old granny yay)

and in more unrelated news. ive been hooked on murakami. i am going to slowly but surely build my collection, even if it means chomping on processed pulp for the next few months.

"No even i know better than that. Im looking for selfishness. Perfect selfishness. Like, say i tell you i want to eat strawberry shortbread. And you stop everything you're doing and run out and buy it for me. And you come back, out of breath and get down on your knees and hold this strawberry shortbread out to me. And i say i dont want it anymore and throw it out of the window. That's what im looking for."

"I'm not sure that has anything to do with love," i said with some amazement.

"It does, " she said. "You just dont know it. There are times in a girl's life when things like that are incredibly important."

"Things like throwing strawberry shortbread out of the window?"

"Exactly. And when i do it, i want the man to apologise and say to me. 'Now i see, Midori. What a fool i've been! i should have known that you would lose your desire for strawberry shortbread. I have all the intelligence and sensitivity of a piece of donkey shit. To make it up to you, i'll go out and buy you something else. What would you like? Chocolate mousse? Cheesecake?'"

"So then what?"

"So then i'd give him all the love he deserves for what he's done."

"sounds crazy to me."

"Well to me that's what love is. Love begins from somthing tiny or silly. From something like that, or it doesnt begin at all."

Norwegian Wood, Haruki Murakami

good stuff should be shared i always say.

here's to many more tomorrows of merry x'mas-es!

ok time for another nap. bye y'all. =)

my immune system is a lousy piece of shit.

zouk tonight kinda felt sorta like a blast from the past... in a good way of course. =)

i am sitting here eating peanuts at 5am because ritchell made my eyes open big big. (for reasons that shall remain undisclosed)

hot yoga earlier today. considered signing up for membership at pure but at 155 bucks per month, i figure i will probably end up starving and skinny (harhar as if) cos thats like half my allowance and thus i will have no monehhh left to eat except to buy bananas or more peanuts. =P

ok thats all i wanted to say. (besides the fact that zoukout was fun and that the killers' album is da best) ok im going back to watching beverly hills 90210!! (yes so old school hor?) their fugly clothes make my mother look so damn hip. -_-"

Uninvited, the thought of you stayed too late in my head,
so I went to bed, dreaming you hard, hard, woke with your name,
like tears, soft, salt, on my lips, the sound of its bright syllables
like a charm, like a spell.

Falling in love
is glamorous hell; the crouched, parched heart
like a tiger ready to kill; a flame’s fierce licks under the skin.
Into my life, larger than life, beautiful, you strolled in.
I hid in my ordinary days, in the long grass of routine,
in my camouflage rooms. You sprawled in my gaze,
staring back from anyone’s face, from the shape of a cloud,
from the pining, earth-struck moon which gapes at me

and I open the bedroom door. The curtains stir. There you are
on the bed, like a gift, like a touchable dream.

Carol Ann Duffy, you

LAST PAPER OF THE SEM!

WHOOOHOOOOOO.

5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm
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5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm
5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm5pm.

er ok im being moronic. yay!

done.

my reason for running? cos everyone seems to have one.

er cos i am mad. (i actually considered writing that on the bib. muhaha)

stanchart half-marathon was frikin painful.

thanks to my roomie 2.0 for sticking it through with me the whole time (and for putting up with my complaints of 'FUCK WHY IS IT LIKE NEVER-FRIKIN-ENDING!!!!')

er i do get quite horrid when im tired. haha. ask her for proof. whatever would i do without her.

oh and i think i must have played that awful Haddaway song 'What is love' on my ipod like 50 million times in an attempt to send myself into a trance so that i wouldnt randomly try to maim the people around me from my rage. (thank god for repeat mode.hoho)

that said, it was nice to finish this with her considering we started out this year with trainin for 5k at surf&sweat.

next year maybe can try 42. (ugh who am i kidding. but then my gf says i have a mind made of plasticine. easily malleable. all you have to do is lure me with promises of glory. oh and a cheesy inspirational slogan or two. hohoho)

speaking of which, thank you gf, xinrong, mel and sarah for coming down to support! love y'all muchly =)

ok i have jelly legs now. yeah i know so loser right.

i must study. ive almost forgotten i still have exams! damn.

i just bought a piece of my childhood.

hurrah for obscure online bookshops.. this was damn cheap compared to the 2nd hand copies on amazon.

AND! the version i bought is a 1967 one. goody. (again i say pfffft to updated cultural references)

whats wrong with me these days.. my enid blyton mania must be a sub-conscious manifestation of some kind.

hohoho.

and they've promised delivery within 5 - 28 days! i hope its closer to 5 tho.

yayyy. ok study. =)

i had been worrying about my exams.

and then i just read all the news reports on the dragonboat tragedy.

and everything was suddenly really put into perspective.

may god help their families find peace.

nostalgic.

these books were such a huge part of my childhood.

then again, my childhood was characterized largely by enid blyton.

pity i gave all my books away.

the new versions are terribly inauthentic considering the change of names and all. (today's cultural relevances my foot)

AND dont even get me started on the new illustrations. (they suck ass)

granted i know that the whole idea of nostalgia is connected to an unrealistic ideal blablabla but ive come to find that to this day there aint nothing that does it for me the way an enid blyton does.

er that said i swear i didnt nick my little sister's copies. hohoho.

so very very blessed. =)

fuck all my fuckin essays are already (!!) ready to be collected. (clearly these people do not make weekend plans)

omfg. i dont know why im freakin out this sem.

SIGH.

cybercrime is sucky. cybercrime test even more sucky. kim doesnt know anything. is 5 hours to time of test. kim dont even understand lecture notes. kim is grateful to wikipedia. wikipedia is the absolute bestest. coz wikipedia gives answers to kim that lecture notes dont. like the meaning of ciphers. and algorithms. and hash functions. and ssl.

but kim is still going to fail anyways. and is still wasting time typing out this blog post. kthxbye.

SIGH.

slowly but surely i have finished grey's season 3.

alot of self control k took me one mth plus. last time i finished 30 episodes in a week leh. (called eat, sleep and breathe greys)

so consider this time round not bad already. haha.

as usual this season was absolutely brilliant and i shed bucket-loads of tears.

the soundtrack is so hauntingly beautiful ive been downloading the music like a fiend.

next on my to-do list: nip/tuck season 4!

im the biggest loser in the world cos ive just spent the past half hour searching on youtube for videos of william scorpion and his cronies. -_-"

dont judge me im a closet cheenapok.

i want to go dragonflyyyyyyy!

ohmigawd public holidays are bad for one's academic health.

i spent the day drifting in and out of sleep, whilst making a few half-hearted attempts to read the text for my stupid ass-say.

which explains the current predicament i find myself in.

erm staring at a balnk computer screen. at 4am in the morning. (technically i could be asleep right now had i utilized my time today. pooi)

haha oh and this blog post is testament to my still- empty head.

oh and its going to rain. how niceee. =)

i have a love-hate relationship with year4.

sometimes it makes me want to puke blood all over the floor or something.

but then there are those other times, that id just read something and feel like the luckiest person in the world to be doing what i do. id not trade it for anything else. ever.

i feel like olivia and lit is my shitty-ass rollo. hohoho i apologise please indulge my geek moments. kinda like having tourettes.

yeah yeah even if it means id be living out of a frikin box once i graduate.

damn i hope cartons make good living spaces. =P

weekend of filming the commericals for tRATgedy was hilarious.

i heart my groupmates.

ugh in the meantime, here comes WALLY WEEEK. =/

so yesterday morning, having gone the previous night with a meagre 30 minutes of shut-eye (as usual a result of my severe procrastination thereby leading to the dreaded last-minute-struggle-to-complete-essay-and-not-kill-self syndrome)...

... i woke up thinking i was a bird.

and wondering why i didnt have any feathers.

rightttttt.

i must be damn tired. plus shitloads of deadlines coming up. looks like this weekend's gonna be lost to filming for the shakespeare commerical.

rewrite your rodent tragedies we say.

wait for it people.

right im off for a run (lest i become the flesh coloured heap at stanchart. see previous previous post)

bye y'all. =)

i totally understand why cute chinese studies guy is well, cute.

cuz he bears a striking resemblance to nip/tuck's christian troy!!

hohoho i always knew i existed within a celluloid reality.

exciting news today. invitation by mom's friend could possibly result in extended stay with their family in london next may! (LUMPS! ARE YOU GETTING THIS! 1 MTH OF POSSIBLY SEEING MY FACE! MUAHAHA)

crossing fingers, toes and whatever else that it all works out cos right now plans are far too premature.

oh and facebook is the evillest thing in the world. but oh-so-fun!

ok off to work. =)

"There comes a sharp break of separation. You feel at first it's not to be borne, but you bear it, you grow accustomed...longing sinks down and is silted over...you never uncover it again in its first unearthly freshness...that's what happened."

Rosamond Lehmann's The Weather in the Streets

ok lets not be beguiled by the cheerful grins.

those self-same grins do little justice to the hour or so of pain and utter suffering. (ok fine i exaggerate but it really felt like that k!)

haha what have i learnt?

that i wont survive stanchart half-marathon if i dont train for it. (yes that flesh-coloured heap by the roadside thats being trampled on would probably be me.. watch for it people)

anyways st james lats night absolutely, totally, utterly KICKED ASS.

whoooohooooooo! and dragonfly was the funnest! (i know theres no such word but who cares it gets my point across)

i was screaming along to the cheenapok rock even though i totally had zero idea when it came to the lyrics.

walao not cool at all but so damn fun. not to mention the utterly fabulous company! =)

love you guys la. seriously. pics as soon as i get a hold of 'em from den-c the genius.

do pardon the slight melodramatic angle.

but i am not at all feeling like myself these days.

im tired. and sometimes so wound up it feels abit like im going mad.

rarr i started this post with the intention to the blog and now i dont feel like it anymore.

ok whatever im just going to watch tv.

because i feel quite sickened after reading recent debates.

bigotry is seriously the crime here. for proof, see: http://www.keep377a.com

ugrh. i am annoyed by the comments no end.

anyhoo..

one of the reasons why my memories of nus will always be perfect.

ok this was wayyyy back in yr1 and i couldnt find a picture with everyone in it so pipi and ys will have to be like an imagined presence in the photo. hurhur.

im feeling pretty nostalgic right now.

much much much love to the girls & boys. =)

wong kar wai's chungking express is lovely. so much resonance in its dialogue.

after all who hasnt ever had to cope with loss in some form?

its amazing how palpable the anguish is. how achingly real.

absolutely brilliant stuff. dont believe me go read this! =)

Cop 223: Somehow everything comes with an expiry date. Swordfish expires. Meat sauce expires. Even cling-film expires. Is there anything in the world which doesn't?

[223 gives a can of pineapple to a passing street person. The street person looks at the can and throws it on the ground]

Street person: It's expired. Don't want it.

Cop 223: you sure?

and i particularly fell in love with this one... (ok fine maybe it was more like with tony leung lor. but who cares his eyes are like omg. hohoho he's cop 663)

Cop 663: Would you let a person on board with a boarding pass like this? It's dated today, but it got blurred in the rain. I don't know where it's taking me. Do you?

Faye: No idea, but I'll give you another.

Cop 663: Great.

Faye: Where do you want to go?

Cop 663: Wherever you want to take me.

sighhhhh. so schweeeeeet la. (ok fine you all may puke blood now if you want)

anyways i had a good week. and the icing to top off the cake was a call from a dear friend whom ive not heard from in a while.

to that dear friend (please lor, as if you didnt know im talkin abt you haha): thanks for calling to remind me that physical distance does nothing to a solid friendship. love youuu =)

people get your minds out of the gutter its not what you think.

hohoho.

anyways my mother loves me she bought me a (get this) banana guard to keep my very nutritious snacks safe. =P

ive only just found out today that such a thing actually does exist.

and im feeling rather touched actually. im such an underserving git of a child.

warm fuzzzyyyy.

ok and grey's is in my hands. byebye academic productivity! who says people learn from their mistakes eh? clearly im not one of those.

p/s: thanks babes for a really fun nightttt. mambo on wed! woooooot! love y'all muchly. =)

and so daniel met gracie on his birthday.

i do think they've quite taken to each other. =P

i'll have an order of 'let-me-just-die-now-please' and a side dish of 'i-hate-essays-they mar-my-otherwise-perfect-existence', thanks very much.

yummmmmm. =/

i say there is nothing more intoxicating than the smell of nice new books.

added to my collection today. and now i feel pretty damn good.

from the letters of abelard & heloise. bonjour tristesse. The eaten heart. giovanni's room.

just because these new penguin editions are oh so yummy.

so self-indulgent can.

as if got time to read them like that.

sigh.

wherever did my holidays go! =/

damnyou.

bone-tired. cui.

the days keep melting into weeks, the weeks into months.

time works faster than i can keep up.

looking forward to the week's break. just so i can catch my breath.

it maddens me no end that even in my sleep i can find neither solace nor reprieve.

ive always wanted one of those v cool pics of myself taken by one of those photogs with the professional-looking long lense cameras.

you know, the kind with like crystal clear water droplets accessorized with look of total concentrated determination.

erm which might explain my constantly furrowed brows in the presence of any photog.

this photo however, was NOT and i repeat NOT the intended effect.

lizard found this, much to my chagrin of course.

the first ever proper photo ive found of myself playing polo,

and the only expression that comes to mind when i look at it is GAHHHHHHHHHH.

ive always thought i looked cooler than that lor.

clearly self-delusion is one of my stronger suits. =/

i think zac efron is really v cute. when i watched hairspray, i think i nosebleed until im surprised i just didnt fall down from severe anaemia.

i also suspect that this dates back to my childhood love affair with my beloved and ONLY Ken doll. erm if you all must know, i think zac efron looks just like my old Ken doll (erm very creatively named ken and came with his very own tube of hair gel. so cool right.)

hurhur.

haiyah anyways im feeling v pffffft cos i came across a whole slew of M***ters blogs. (you can find just about anything on google these days and so im taking no chances and naming no [full] names)

am feeling particularly agitated after reading.

though i dunno why im being so incredibly bo liao given the amount of work that is hanging in a dark cloud above my head.

highlights of my upcoming week: presentation.test.essay.

and all due within a day of each other. enough to make you high leh. and not to mention the mounting pile of unread texts.

i should add a disclaimer to this post. please ignore incoherent ranting severely needed to maintain sanity.

in something else totally random and unrelated that i need to get off my chest because its also annoying me. i hate telling myself 'i told you so'. its so terribly consuming a struggle. not to mention shitty.

2 steps back. stupid git.

whatever laaaaaaa im gg to study.

good weekend. =)

i am so proud of my team. each and every one of them.

for not giving up when the going got the toughest.

lets make this coming weekend an even better one yeah?

hoot hoot!

and yayyyyy to another week of training! =)

ive been feeling terribly grumpy these days.

thus explaining this bout of not-so-niceness that ive been made victim of these past couple of weeks. sorry to those people who've had their heads snapped off. hur i promise im gonna be nicer! =)

argh fatigue. and trying not to think. important matches this weekend. focus focus.

oddly enough though, i received a coupla msgs last week. where once there might have been a tinge of what i can only describe as happy, it occured to me that what i felt that day was little more than indifference.

i dont forget. nor do i deny its existence.

i just choose not to remember.

i havent been blogging lately.

and the start of the school term definitely has not aided matters.

year4 is proving to be nothing short of painful.

like who has heard of homework in the first week right!

looks like i'll be bookworming it with my roomie 2.0 earlier than anticipated.

hurhur.

argh in a random note to self - must stop anyhow spending monehhh.

not say got alot lor.

almost ended up buying a super pretty, absolutely fabulous (i repeat: super pretty, absolutely fabulous) adidas jacket yst.

the only thing that stopped me was the fact that it cost about almost as much as liposuction for one thigh.

i am a freak. hur.

i was in my 20thc class the other day (ewwwwww) but i do like this very much. and everybody knows that when i like something, i do like to write it down:

' It is true that life is sometimes very swift and breathless, but not always. If we are to be truly alive there are large pauses in which we creep away into our caves of contemplation. And then it is, in the silence, that Memory mounts his throne amd judges all that is in our minds, appointing each his separate place, high or low, rejecting this, selecting that - putting this one to shine in the light and throwing that one into the darkness. '

i like how this gives me a reason to blame something else for my selective lapses in memory.

speaking of Mansfield, damn presentation on thurs. shit year4 is no fun. =/

ok im tired and i need to study. byebye y'all.

a renewed motivation.

i am inspired. and reminded of why i started playing in the very first place.

so here we go. =)

recently i've been having recurrent thoughts.

i cant quite put a finger on it.

its the longest ive ever gone without seeing, speaking or even having any semblance of contact.

it was good. because i thought i was finally rid of a familiarity to which i had become far too accustomed.

and yet somehow, for some reason i cannot fathom, this small part of me actually wonders how you're doing.

funny how old habits die hard. or maybe they just dont really die at all.

Queen croc is outta the office.

Hence i am free to do mindlessly random nonsense that will benefit my life in no way whatsoever.

and that, ladies and gentlemen (points to the left) is the current highlight of existence.

joyyyyy.

ever been so tired you feel you'd just conk out if you sat down for a moment?

today i fell alseep at the printers' whilst waiting for my stuff to be photocopied.

omg.

but no matter! for it is ALMOST fridayyyy!

and training camp awaits.

wooooooooot!

18 more working days. =)

i had krispy kremes todayyyy! woooot! on the 7th day god also made donuts.

ok out of point but thankew xinrongggg! =)

anyways angkor-land peek-tures have been pretty long overdue.

but better late than never eh?

now altogether everybody, sayyy 'buddha'!! =P

walking across raffles place today.

i paused. looked down.

and realised the square on which i stood had the words 'Are You Happy?' stenciled on them.

coincidence? perhaps. =)

You wanna steal a piece of time
You can sing the melody to me
And I can write a couple of lines

dilbert may well be the best thing to happen to desk-bound disillusionists the world over.

hur!

well maybe since mindless time consuming online clicky clicky games.

now i must go back and try to figure out mudcraft.

sometimes i wonder if i am unduly harsh.

and because i dont have the answer to that, i continue to put it out of mind.

guess you just learn to deal.

argh anyway in other news,work is sucky.

strangely enough i cannot wait for aug to come and school to start.

for i am starting to believe that i will begin the desecnt into a microsoft-document churning office cronie. (i get dilbert, i really do!)

hur. =P

mambo was v fun but i do believe my age is showing. my sombering physical condition (also known as fatigue and achy feet) belie my apparent youthful demeanour.

tired. and sleep deprived.

ok work tmr. need sleep. byebye!

indeed the truth does set one free.

liberation. =)

still feels like a sucker punch to the gut.

kinda like being given all the pieces of a very broken pot and being told,

'now you put it back together'

heh and you really can get blindsided when you least expect it. (albeit not at 4pm on some idle tuesday yet somehow idle enough to compound the situation)

whatever. i am getting too tired to care.

and you should just walk away.

ok so here's one more for the road.

oh yeah cant wait for thursday! =)

thanks chin for the supply of art work which i am sure will be the receipient of some prestigious award for abstract art in the near future. =P

haha.

marketing paper stuff is killinggg me.

and you know your brain is giving out on you when you can deign to subject yourself to mindless quizzes that determine what kind of sandwich you are. =/

im ham in case anybody wants to know.

like how blah right.

i.cannot.focus.

veryveryvery tired.

here i shall put forth a disclaimer that the following words are slightly evil and if averse to such, please shield eyes.

and thus...

i swear i will forever be plagued by imbecilic (god is that a word!) behaviour! it cannot be so hard to exhibit behaviour that is becoming of a regular human being yes?

anyways lucky i have fawlty towers to brighten my existence. =)

Mrs Richards: And another thing: I asked for a room with a view.

Basil Fawlty: [aside to Manuel] Deaf, mad, *and* blind.

[to Mrs. Richards as he makes a show of inspecting the view]

Basil Fawlty: This is the view as far as I can remember... Yes... Yes, this is it.

Mrs. Richards: When I pay for a view, I expect to see something more interesting than that.

Basil Fawlty: That is Torquay, madam.

Mrs. Richards: Well, that's not good enough.

Basil Fawlty: Well, might I ask what you expected to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window? Sydney Opera House, perhaps? The hanging gardens of Babylon? Herds of wildebeest sweeping majestically...

Mrs. Richards: Don't be ridiculous. I expect to be able to see the sea.

Basil Fawlty: You CAN see the sea. It's over there between the land and the sky.

haha like how not to laugh right.

urgh no peace of mind. go away.

and forensic sci exam tmr (no work done god forbid!) is really not helping my mood.

i need 11am tmr to come. like now.

yet another brilliant (ahem!) piece of abstract art by daniel chin.

im practically building a collection here.

exams do cultivate the creative streak dont they? =P

first papers tmr. owwwww.

so tonight's msn conversation with chin started with this.

i'd say his state of mind about exams right now?

burn, baby burn!

hahahaha. and i echo the sentiment.

its 5am.

armed with crime and punishment, no woman no cry my soundtrack for tonight.

my thoughts reverberate. but thats all they do before settling back into the dust.

man i should really get some sleeeeep la.

But everything's gonna be alright.

scratch. and realise it's as raw as the day it was made.

and thats damn fucked up.

ok so 7 hours of war film have left my brain feeling a little bit fucked.

haaaaaa.

and so i will indulge in a 'steal some quiz off a friend's blog' moment.

'feel like saying something? get it off your chest. say something to ten people, the most honest and heartfelt msg. do not leave a name, if it's meant to be, they will know its for them. partners not included.'

to you - my mountain that doesnt budge. haha you have no idea how much that has done for me. i am a better person for having you in my life, really. what amazes me about us, and still continues to do so, is the simplicity of it all. that all its about is just love. and that makes all the difference to me. thank you for never judging. you are irreplacable. =)

to you - who told me that its not as easy as i made it seem. and that it was ok that it wasnt. 'you think this is an essay deadline ah?' sound familiar? haha. i think if not for you always looking out for me, i would be nothing but a bundle of chaos. you keep me grounded. and you remind me of other things that are just as important.

to you - you are worth so much. i think you know that.

to you - dont grow up too fast k? you embody love without condition. my greatest fear (which is not so secret now) is that one day i'll come home and realise you dont think im so cool anymore. then how! =)

to you - im glad we stuck to working it out. we all make mistakes.we didnt give up. and i hope you might have forgiven me too.

to you - i think cj was great because of you. and no i am not being sappy on purpose. i am serious ok! i was looking at erm, neoprints the other day. such fond memories. the t19 xmas song. adventures of hams. my collection of rodenty material. it makes me happy that we see each other more now.

to you - who listened to me at all hours, despite your busy schedule with school and work. and for STILL listening to all my gripes. haha. you always make me laugh and suddenly everything is better.

to you - you wont see this and probably never will. you were perfect for awhile. but perfection is transient. i see, and i dont like what we've become. its a little bittersweet how different we are now.

ok im cheating abit on the next one by like naming more than just 2!

to you, you, you and you - for never having left. because of you, i am reminded that there are some people who are too special to let go of.

im done. and i have to get back to work.

spread the love people! =)

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

a rush of blood to the head.

and then,

nothing.

sourcing for internships just so your mother will not nag at you for the next three months is such a chore.

and!

it doesnt help that you start to feel the malaise associated with the 'omg i am gonna graduate soon and i still dunno what i wanna do with my life' syndrome.

lucky for me i have baz lurhmann.

'Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.'

- from everybody's free (to wear sunscreen)

there is hope yet for us mere mortals! =)

geeky lit moment!

'The hypothesis of God, for instance, gives an incomparably absolute opportunity to understand everything, and know absolutely nothing.'

Roadside Picnic, The Strugatsky Brothers

i think i tried to talk.

amidst the evasiveness, i think there was some understanding.

when i heard that, i could only respond with a, 'why realise this only now?'

would it be different if it was made known earlier?

i have no way of knowing this.

and perhaps i would rather not find out.

i can only negotiate with the speculations of what is and was.

and figure

hey wth, perhaps it happened when it wasnt supposed to.

too bad. shit happens.

the strangest thing was when you said,

'nothing's changed. the core of it is still there'

and all i did was laugh.

mirthless.devoid of any amusement.

because at that moment, i felt that you hadnt the faintest idea of what you were saying.

since i always credit my sources (i, non-plagiarist!)

http://www.bookblog.net/gender/genie.html

haha thanks xuan!! =)

its a pretty nifty test. determine ur gender just by looking at your writing!

if i understand what this test i saying,

my writing is masculine when im upset and feminine when im happy.

schizo!

go try it people. =)

"they were supposed to be the ones who would help us eighteen-year-olds to make the transition, who would guide us into adult life, into a world of work, of responsibilities, of civilized behaviour and progress - into the future. Quite often we ridiculed them and played tricks on them, but basically we believed in them. In our minds the idea of authority - which is what they represented- implied deeper insights and a more humane wisdom. But the first dead man we saw shattered this conviction. We were forced to recognize that our generation was more honourable than theirs; they only had the advantage of us in phrase-making and in cleverness. Our first experience of heavy artillery fire showed us our mistake, and the view of life that their teaching had given us fell to pieces under that bombardment."

Remarque's All Quiet on the Western Front

so we took a trip down to sentosa for surf and sweat last weekend.

what fun!

everything is less painful when you can do it w your team. (yes no joke, even 5 klik in gross heat - look not a cloud in the sky.)

haha ok this is one of those awwwww moments.

but i love you guys i really do. but you all knew that already wat. =P

that aside, school has yielded nothing surprising as yet.

i'll save the usual 'oh-god-im-at-least-50000-books-behind-everyone-else' spiel.

aiyah i am gg to go become a police officer la.

at least they give out nice testpad paper at career fairs. hur.

ok i need to read sherlock.

'my mind,' he said, 'rebels at stagnation. Give me problems, give me work, give me the most abstruse cryptogram, or the most intricate analysis, and i am in my own proper atmosphere. I can dispense then with artificial stimulants. But i abhor the dull routine of existence. I crave for mental exaltation. That is why i have chosen my own profession, or rather created it, for i am the only one in the world.'

haiyah i missed the hospital todayyy!

and i was like anticipating this the whole week la!

hur so cheena-pok right. (but who cares. i like jerry and fei xiang)

cheena-pok enough to own the entire meteor garden on vcd! (erm pirated no less but still!)

but then i had hoped it would be a somewhat cheena version of grey's.

i miss grey's.

sucky limewire is so problematic nowadays.

urgh.

anyways!

surf n sweat tmr!!

im quite psyched up.

although at this time tmr i will probably look at this post again and snort in disgust. (eh 5 klik is no fun lor)

haha ok early start tmr. bed! =)

my father is more stubborn than my warts lor.

weird analogy aside,

it merely means that he wont budge.

and given that we are both damn stubborn individuals (which is weird cos i am the taurus and i have dibs on being stubborn. serious! the stars say so.)

the problem i see, is that we like dunno how to talk it out.

aiyoh damn dysfunctional laaaaaa. =/

i am convinced that any individual who has been plagued with spam mail (erm i think just about everybody la) can relate to this:

Dear friends

I'd like to extend my heartfelt appreciation to all ofyou who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed andhealthy.

Extra thanks to whoever sent me the email about rat crap in the glue on envelopes - because I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.

Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

Because of your genuine concern, I no longer drink Coca Cola because I know it can remove toilet stains, which is not exactly an appealing characteristic.

I no longer check the coin return on public phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a wild boar on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping centres because someone might drug me with a cologne sample and rob me.

I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer worry about my soul because at last count, I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. (snigger snigger)

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl on the internet who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).

I no longer have any money at all in fact - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special on-line email program.

Yes, I want to thank you all so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favour!

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diahorrea will land on your head at 5:00PM (EST) this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my ex-next door neighbour's step-mother-in-law's second husband's third cousin's beautician's gay son.

sounds a little all too familiar yeah? =)

having posted this on my blog, may that pigeon not shit on my head AND i get like 7 years (at least!) of happiness bestowed from above. =P

polo.kallang.school.mambo.cjc.theflu.

the week in short. a nice kick-off to the term.

'cept for the bit about the flu of course. bah humbug.

anyways hor, why is mtv not sending me that eagerly anticipated email?!!!

doesnt entering 50 times eliminate all other possibility of someone else winning the muse concert tickets?

unless of course someone beat my record 50 with 100 or something. (to which i curse them to an eternity of never winning anymore mtv contests. poooi.)

hur.

no fear there is always tmr.

highlight of my day:

i found the elusive men's pocky at the shell station! oh pure and utter elation!

ok my life has really become boringggg when i start getting batty about biscuits. hur.

that said, its nice when the heaviness is shed and there exists the realisation that its all been left behind.

somehow it just doesnt matter so much anymore. =)

blood diamond was a.m.a.z.i.n.g

ive never been a dicaprio fan but he truly outdid himself this time.

fwahhhhhh.

when 2007 rolled around, i put everything that wasnt so nice into a little bag and threw it away.

metaphorically, of course. hur.

and thus the year begins on a good note.

was looking at the new year's post i made last year and it evoked what i can only classify as a sense of the bittersweet.

haha. ah but there is no place for melancholia on this blog!

none i say!

and so!

my new year's resolution yet again?

(and i anticipate a 'now where have i heard this before?!' from the canoe polo folks when they read this)

abs by christmas!!! =)

oh and one last thing..

for my mostest (haha yes you know im talking about you la), i love you mostest! hughughug.