Just Like Tides

Today.

It was WONDERFUL!!! :')

You know, i initially thought that it would be a dreadful day... because it's a day of getting to know and meeting a lot of new people. And i would feel so scared again. Because i thought i might not be able to fit in.

Haha, but don't worry. God says. Just be yourself.

And i was.

The fear was forgotten throughout the whole day. I never thought about it at all. Praise God! It's wonderful.

I absorbed so much during the polyserve event today. Some PEP (Prayer, Evangelism, Partnership) event held at Emmanuel House in Aljunied.

I'm reminded that i needed to discipline myself. You know how i always don't manage to read the bible consistently everyday? Or how i fall asleep halfway while lying down on the bed to pray?

Haha, i found a workable solution at the event today! I've decided to read the bible after i bathe every night. Because that's when i would feel freshened up. And i would kneel down beside my bed to pray before i sleep everynight, instead of lying down.... and being lazy.

It's time to discipline myself! Follow it, Dorcas!

Haha, i really wanted to read the book that i borrowed from the library before i sleep today... but i guess i'll exchange it for the bible instead. I will read the bible tonight. :')

I pray that i'm able to get the notion of HAVING to, to NEEDING to, to WANTING to read the bible and do my QT (quiet time) everyday consistently.

After the event, my NP group and i went to have dinner together as this coffee shop! Hahaha, there are all sorts of people in my group. They were really entertaining. Everyone is so different from each other. So unique. They each have their flaws and strengths.

Had a good time eating and laughing with them! Robin was so... urgh!!

Kept making fun of my name... with the brand "Dockers". It's okay, God bless Robin!

Hahaha, then there were these two sweet girls called "Tongxin" and "Ruixin". The group lied to me! I thought they were really sisters! Ohhh mannn wateva~ hahaha. They didn't even look one bit alike in the first place.

Went off to meet the CF-ers (Christian Fellowship people) at Simei after that. Haha, Gloria was there too!! ^^v I missed her, my goody friend...

I had sucha great time with them watching movies like "Sound of Music" and "Coraline" at Joyce's house. I have never felt so warm with them before. :')

Praise God again!

They were watching "Shrek" when i had to leave. It was about 11+p.m by then. Our friend, E, sent Gloria and i back home in his black Hyundai Getz. He's wonderful. He has such a unique testimony. I'm Wow-ed by him. Talking to him while he sent me back home in his car at the end of the day was great.

His testimony: Drug trafficker. 8 years in prison. Studying first year in poly now at 32 years old.

He's quiet... but that's why i'm comfortable with him. He isn't a Christian yet... there are some things that he isn't able to surrender to God.

I wanna thank Joyce for the wonderful host that she was today! She's a dear...

I thank Gloria for being there too. If it weren't for her, i wouldn't even be there... :")

Blogged @ 2:07 AM

It would just be pictures tonight. :")

Sorry bout the bad quality photos. Haha, maybe when i have money to get a good camera! hahaha... that'd prolly be like... many years down the road considering the fact that i'm not really good at controlling my own expenses. ^__^;;

And my mama doesn't see the point in getting a camera now so... i'll just have to make do.

Oh, and pictures tell tales... dya know?

Goodnight everyone...

Blogged @ 1:40 AM

Goodmorning/goodevening everyone! ^^v

I know i have been blogging quite a bit lately... But it's just a sudden surge of passion to blog about my day! ... And the things that i learnt during the day.

I believe that there's something to learn in every little thing that happens.

What do you learn when you lose your patience easily with the people around you? Your family, friends or even to strangers. You learn that you have much more to work on your tolerance level. You learn that you lose patience easily sometimes because you care about yourself more than the people around you.

What do you learn when you see nobody helping a blind or lame man up the bus? You learn that you should be more vigilant and prepared to provide help when necessary. If no one will do it, you should.

So what do you learn when you see SOMEONE helping a blind or lame man up the bus? Hahah, you learn that there is still hope in Singapore!

Actually Singapore isn't that bad... because more often than not, i always see people giving way to the elderly in public transport and all... And i like seeing such stuff.

Okay! Yesterday! My god brother Wilbur visited me suddenly on a very, very short notice. Just called me up and asked "Hey dor, are you free now?"

And i said yes (i was still in night time clothes), but only til evening time. And he came!

Hahaha. But it's been a long time since i last saw him... months ago, i suppose? Been so busy... It's already September.

Wake me up, when September ends~~~

Okokay back to topic! So he came and we practiced a little on the guitar together. He played mostly and i tried to sing. He was trying to practice this song called "Still" before he left for cell group later on. Wilbur was the guitarist cuz Gregory got enlisted into the army on that very same day.

He went off to meet his girlfriend at woodlands. I prepared myself to meet Gloria at Novena, where her workplace is. Had dinner at Han's. Jackson and Eileen met us while we were eating. And then off we went to the taxi stand! Where Gloria's father will be fetching us from in his white erm... Honda? MPV? Or is it SPV? Hahahaha, oh man... Cars. CMI!

Prawning was such an experience! I tried to learn the tactic of prawning today! haha, kudos to Uncle John (Gloria's dad) for teaching! :} It was a nice time... really relaxing. The people there were Jackson, Eileen, Gloria, Uncle John, Ah Hiock, Uncle John's friend, Dennis (came later on) and me!

Caught three prawns... hahaha, i didn't know the prawns were that big! I thought it's those kind of... small prawns that we eat over the dinner table. But when i saw someone catch a prawn, it was huge! I thought it was a baby lobster!

Apparently Uncle John said it was. Ehh??? I'm so confused now. So are they a different breed of prawns of lobsters?? I think it's the former.

Ah Hiock is so cute... haha, he's like a fish monger. He's 12 this year. Totally fearless of the prawns' pincers. Singlet top. 3/4 pants. Like fishmonger not???

Eileen was pretty quiet today. But it's nice seeing Jackson and Eileen together and all. Gloria keeps making fun of them... haha, J and E will get married if he's outta the army and she's still with him. And if everything else permits.

BBQ-ed the prawns after the catch. It was already like about 1a.m by then? I kinda sprained by ankle. I don't know how, don't know when. Weird!

So by the time the prawns were BBQed orange, it was about 1.30-1.45a.m. They were oishi!! Sugoi! @.@;;; And the ingredients were just prawns and salt! The flesh was nice. Especially when it's so big too >_>

You can just like, put the whole meat into your mouth and chew! Yum~

By the time i got home, it was like... 2.15a.m...

My parents have been understanding. Usually they get kinda worried if their daughter stays out too late... :')

I thank everyone for today and i thank God for everyone! :}

Was supposed to have worship practice with my CG in church today... but apparently there has been a mix up and our time to lead isn't this week. Haha... So it was called off. My family will be going to sit on the Singapore Flyer today! Hmm... afternoon time isn't really the best time to take it i think. But oh well! :'D

I told my mom about prawning this morning. After it all, she said "Okay lor, let's go prawning again today."

"What? Serious?"

O.O

Blogged @ 11:55 AM

I had a nightmare yesterday night...

Can't really recall what it was about now but i was running a lot. Running away from some evil thing... and it possessed my family members or something. URgg i can't remember. And i don't really wish to. ^^;;

Hehe. I woke up to a bright morning! .... With thunder! @.@ The sky still looks beautiful though... it's mostly white clouds... a bit grayish... but more towards the white~

Hahahaha it was so funny and i know that i'm so evil in saying this but... i was just lying on my bed after waking up from my nightmare when the thunder boomed and i heard a few kids around my block scream! They screamed so funny that i was so amused! I wonder if i used to scream in such a high pitch voice before. Hehe.

Yeah so... twas a weird concoction of feelings... i was scared and amused at the same time; scared because of my nightmare, amused because of the kids' screaming.

So i was just lying there on my bed... and then...

BOOOOOMMMMM!!

This time, the thunder was so much more loud and intimidating! And it came without warning man!!! No lightning to warn you! It was so loud and sharp. I jumped. And i wondered at the same time why the kids didn't scream their funny scream this time since it was so much more scary? Maybe they were petrified because of the previous thunder and this thunder roll further petrified them.

I pulled the blanket up to my chin and curled up my body into a ball so that my blanket covered my feet. Scary... Hey, i just had a nightmare leh.. T~T

I looked outta the window up at the sky without my spectacles. The vision was very blur because i'm literally half blind without vision aid. It was so bright! What's sucha loud thunder doing on sucha bright morning?

So my mind began to wonder...

Did the gas tank explode? Thus the loud boom...

Did a car explode?

Something collided?

UFOs in the sky?

Rapture???

Then i heard the faint sound of rain... it was drizzling. Haha, okay... well, i guess it's just thunder afterall...

Update: Oh, did i mention? I'm going prawning later with Gloria and her Dad and her God bro Jackson! And his girlfriend! My first time!!! Ohmygoshohmygosh do prawns bite? hahahahaha kidding. :} Have a blessed day everyone!

Blogged @ 11:26 AM

Ahhh... the moon is so big and yellow tonight! I described it as "beautiful and mysterious"... Dennis said it had a little of that sinister feel. I rebutted him and said that it was just mysterious but i secretly agreed with him in my mind.

Haha, i spent my late morning (was still sleeping in the early morn :x) and afternoon at home doing my own stuff. Catching up with some friends on FB, read the newspapers, blogged, e-mailed. Time passes fast! And before i know it, i was making this last minute decision to meet up with Larissa A.K.A my wife A.K.A Pizza and Mr.Ng A.K.A Kaya... Phew! Tongue twister. Heheh... well, kinda.

Pizza hasn't really been feeling very happy recently. She has been sounding so dull over the phone that i kinda got worried for her. She has never sounded this way before. So i thought that it would be cool to ask Jason along! He's Pizza's god brother. And they were very close once... Not sure about now though. Haha, yeah... and in the end, Kaya didn't come, but Jason did!

Hahaha. Aiyah... Kaya's just getting old now. Doesn't even wanna get out of his comforty bed and catch up with us! Actually... i was pretty comfortable at home too. Almost didn't want to go out... wanted to just go to the library to borrow some books to read.

I figured that the holidays is a very good time to read up some books! Especially when you have nothing to do and don't want to waste time. Books are really inspirational. Haha, but of course, it also depends on what kind of books you have in your palms as well. :)

Anyway! Didn't want to force Kaya out with us, so the three of us had our own fun! Hahaha, Larissa and Jason just kept on talking man... both of them have so much opinion and it seemed like if they don't prove their point, they cannot sleep tonight or something. Hahahaha but they talked about interesting stuff. And i'm just more or less absorbing what they had to say about it all.

Talked about cars and the car parts, grinding in clubs... boy-girl relationships... universities... poly versus JC... checking out 30+ year old guys? Gosh. Jason. Hahahah!

Hahaha, so we just sat there at the Macdonalds at United Square and talked about anything under the sun. It's nice to catch up... talk about things that happened in secondary school... it's a really special bond that brings us together. As students from the same high school. :')

Jason's a really nice guy! Pizza said that he's a good friend that she doesn't want to lose. I'm so glad this outing cheered her up. She sounded so much better. Sighh... I'm just so glad! Haha, i thank God for friends.

Alright... time to get ready for bed... 2.27a.m now! Goodnight everyone, sweet dreams tonight~

Blogged @ 2:29 AM

Hello World!

I've changed the background for my blogskin because... T~T...

Because the user of that starfield background has been idle for 90 days... so the whole star background thingy is gone! I liked it so much! T~T I mean... it's... it's...

It's STARSSS...!! T___T ......

Anyway, with that aside, haha, the new background still isn't that bad i guess. It gives a different feel. A lighter feel... but it's pretty common... white swirls... shucks. It's okay. What matters more is the content of the blog posts, right? Not the background, right???

tee hee ^^v

It's been a wonderful day today. Went to church for this event. Telling us how we can evangelise through the internet! Haha, pretty interesting. So for the first time ever, i posted up a post on Facebook!

Saying "If men came from monkeys, then where do monkeys come from?" Haha, it's talking about evolution.

Some friends commented on it... Haha, and their responses were pretty funny.

So anyway, after church, Jere and i went to have dinner at this prata shop. Our church is at Little India so like... everywhere there are prata shops! hahaha, and it smells heavenly! Especially when you're hungry. >_>

Had a great time knowing more about him. I realised that... i really wanted to know what's happening in the lives of my friends around me... So that i can keep up with them. It's nice. :')

After which, i went home! Haha, then went out to run at night with Dennis, as promised. I would've stayed all the way for the event if not. Cuz it seemed fun and beneficial. :) The event shifted from our church to another location at Aljunied. Ends at 9p.m. Pretty late and far...

The run with Dennis was great nonetheless! His Nike thingy registered that we ran 6km... including about 1.6km of walking. Haha, 6KM?! I don't think so though... think there was something wrong with the Nike watch thingy. I don't know what you call that ^^:;

Went to Chongpang to drink Soya bean. and had you tiao... hahaha. So smart right! Eating such oily stuff after running! It was crazy.

I was reminded of my nu er when he drove me to Chong Pang... we used to go there and eat during our secondary school days... :") haha, it was so fun. I wonder how she's doing now... with her boyfriend...

God has been revealing many things to me recently. Through books... through the things that happened. I learnt that i needed to work on controling my tongue... and my anger.

And all along, i've thought that i was good at holding it back. But God showed me my weakness. :")

On monday this week, i was late for my proj meeting so i had to take a cab. Alas, the cab was snatched by other people about 3 or 4 times! Gosh, i was so angry when it got snatched the first time by a plump lady that i let the F word slip outta my mouth without trying to hold it back.

I immediately apologised to God soon after! hahahaha. Then i waited for another cab. And i saw more people trying to snatch the cab! It was a guy this time. And so, i walked ahead of him. I was late! But somehow, he got the cab again. Aiya, i don't know how to explain it, and i can't be bothered to!

Anyway... i was already listening to Christian songs by then, because i was so infuriated. I cooled down... and i told myself that if i didn't get a cab by 10a.m, i would go home.

God just wanted to make me wait. He was training my patience. He let the cabs get snatched 2 more times. I felt so hopeless that i gave up. After waiting for more than half an hour for a cab... i mean, i might as well have taken a bus!

So i took out my phone and started to sms my group mate. Just then... God sent a cab over. And it was empty. It was driving slowly towards me... and i flagged it down.

The project meeting didn't commence though! Because Willie didn't come. Apparently it wasn't even confirmed, but my group mate assumed that it was... hahaha. But it's alright! It's just $14.20 for the cab fare... in exchange for the wonderful time spent catching up with my two girl group mates, Cindy and Yian ping... Totally worth it if you ask me! ^^v

I was so engrossed in catching up with them and asking them about their lives that my bad mood from the cab snatching experience disappeared. Can't even be seen by my friends!

Cindy even commented "Hey Dorcas you look so happy today!" Haha...

I want to encourage all those who had a bad day... Don't let it follow you for the rest of it. You gotta learn how to deal with it. Not run away from it. And to deal with it, really requires a lot of effort to pull yourself out of the pit that you've fallen into.

A great deal of self-control is needed to stop yourself from thinking and brooding over the bad stuff.

Talk to friends! Distract yourself from it. Read a book. Play games! Just don't play until pek chek... and feel even worst.

Which is better? Learning from a bad experience or brooding over it?

Keep trying... keep trying, Dorcas!!

:')

Simple things like getting so easily irritated by my brother shows how much i can hold my impatience and anger. It's time to work on it.

Holy Spirit, guide me!

Have a blessed day, friends! :)

Update: Thanks Jere for the dinner treat! =))

Blogged @ 2:04 PM

Sigh...~

You know what "down days" are? I don't really know how to describe them, but some words that come to mind are words like "quiet", "low self-esteem", "boring".

Sigh, and no matter how you try... you just can't feel any better.

It was a down day for me today. Negative thoughts kept hovering around my head, like irritating flies that just won't go away. No matter how randomly you sway your hands in hope to chase them away, it's all just in vain!

In view of this, i realise how important it is to equip myself with the sword to fight. It's a battle out there, the world's the destructive creature, and i'm the knight. No wait, knightress. Is there sucha word?? Okay whatever... you get the point!

When you feel down, i want to encourage you to keep looking up! Don't keep looking to your left or your right. Don't look back. Look up, to God.

When you feel so confused, don't know what to do... afraid to take the next step because you're not sure where it leads to, look up. What good does it do for you to look back and keep wondering about what went wrong? I tell you that when you're confused, you'll just keep looking and searching for the answer but you will never find anything that helps or makes you feel better.

Don't put yourselves in that kind of situation...

When you feel like you're left out sometimes, know that you have God. Honestly, i am feeling quite discouraged now because on certain occasions when i felt left out, i can't see God either. I can't feel Him. Then my negative self-esteem would over take me.

They call out to me, saying "You're no good. You're a bore and people don't want to talk to you! Just go home! Go back to where your comfort zone is. Don't even try. Why bother?"

Rebuke those lies from the Devil in Jesus' name.

I know that it is not true. And i like the challenge. I will keep trying and God will provide me the strength! He will make a way... :}}

Ohmygosh, Dory's phrase just came into my mind...

"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming~"

Haha, i thank God for my life. I shall make full use of it. In Jesus' name, amen!

^^v ..

Blogged @ 11:00 PM