The older my daughter gets the harder the conversations become. I told everyone who's said anything that nine really does feel like my little girl is no longer a little girl. Eight felt like she was growing up too fast but from nine on out every conversation becomes increasingly serious in nature.
There are things every kid should learn growing up and Michael and I decided those things would be learned at home first before they were brought up in a real world situation. I want my children to have knowledge of how this world they are growing up into works and I think it is safest if that is learned from the words of my husband and myself. I feel it important that things like sex, adoption, boyfriends, friends, homosexuality, pornography, abuse, mental illness, politics, etc. not be taboo subjects that are never spoken of. It is very important to me that if my children have questions on these issues they know that our door is ALWAYS open and nothing they want to discuss with us is off limits or inappropriate.
This has been a true learning curve as of late. We have had situations arise, as every parent of a preteen experiences, where some of these subjects need to be discussed. The gut reaction of most parents when they hear of these subjects is pure fear. We fear for what our child may know, or what they may not know. We fear because we know the consequences of the paths they choose before they do. We fear because we are scared for them to grow up and have to become adults in this crazy world we live in. I am so eternally grateful for the promptings of the spirit. Michael and I work very hard not to let our fears or anger over run our reactions. The only way, in my opinion, to have the "hard" conversations is through the spirit. Although the conversations are hard, they are also necessary. They become simple when done through the guidance of the spirit.
I always fear that what I am saying or doing in one of the delicate conversations will have a negative lasting affect but I know that as I let the spirit guide my words and thoughts my child will hear what the Lord intends for her to hear, when He intends her to hear it. I just have to have enough Faith to let it happen and not let the fear of my child growing up rule my actions. I read a quote a while back that has stuck with me and helped me not to fear so much for the choices my children will make. I don't remember it exactly but it was something like...Someday our perfect babies will just grow up to be normal people. It helped me put into perspective that my children will make mistakes, they will have hard times, they will feel the Devil work against them and that they will grow up to be like me. Just a person. My only hope is to arm them with enough information, strength, and faith to face whatever challenges lay before them. "If God brings you to it, He'll bring you through it."
