Not a lot

Not a lot to say

Not a lot going on

Smidget has been home from school for two days with a fever and cough. I'm not sure what she's got, but seems to be improving. Back to school tomorrow, I suppose!

We finally gave Queenie the boot from the crib. She thought it was great fun for the first two nights, after which she was begging to go back. D dismantled it and stashed the pieces in his closet. Take that, whiny two-year old. The battle has been won and she is snoozing peacefully in her BED at this very moment.

Chatterbox has been zipping through the Harry Potter books. She is only 7, so I wasn't planning on letting her read past #3, but she begged me ... and how can one deny a child who is begging to read a monster-sized book? I acquiesced. She finished it last night and couldn't fall asleep, she was so upset about the (spoiler alert) death of Cedric. She wanted me to look up who dies in #5 to see if she would actually proceed with it. Ah, the sadness.

My tummy has popped and I broke into my maternity clothes this week. I will be 20 weeks on Tuesday--we will find out what we are having on April 13 (I'm waiting for my parents to get here for the big reveal).

Got our carpets all cleaned yesterday and now I'm trying to get furniture put back. It feels great to have "new" carpet again. Mmmm .... feels like spring.

In which my blog title is finally explained

I've been meaning to post an explanation to my blog title since I hatched it ... which has been a few years now, so you see how important that has been to me. :) Now is as good a time as any, I suppose.

The literary allusion comes from one of my favorite poems by Byron, second line of the second stanza--this poem captures a woman who, to me, sounds perfect. It is a woman I aspire to be . . .

Of course, like anyone, I recognize that I am a lifetime away from the "perfection" I hope to attain, which is why I focused on the grace being impaired -- not there yet, basically. I don't know if this will make sense to anyone else, which is probably why I have taken so long to attempt to explain it. Poetry and our personal interpretation thereof is so relative to our experiences. Well, you can try if you like! :)

Here's the dashing? Lord Byron ...

And here's the poem...

She Walks In Beauty

She walks in Beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes:
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which Heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o’er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!

by Lord Byron (January 22, 1788 – April 19, 1824)
can be found in The 100 Best Poems of All Time
image – makelessnoise

Random thoughts

*So I was wrong about the rain ... it's been raining on and off (mostly ON) since I last posted. Sunday and Monday included some serious downpours, causing some hydroplaning while driving to swimming lessons... that was an adventure! But I am still enjoying it for the most part. For one thing, everything is so green!

*The day I told my kids about the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, they wanted to DO something immediately. Chatterbox really wanted to pack up all of her stuffed animals to send, but I told her that might not be the most helpful course of action at this point. They settled on creating "art" to sell for 25 cents apiece and got busy peddling their wares. Thanks to all who supported them! They made $4, which I told them I would match, for a total of $8. On Sunday they each added their $4 to their tithing envelopes, marked "Japan" in the humanitarian box, and turned it in. So proud. :)

*Easter is coming up. I have been nibbling, euphemism for steadily inhaling, Easter candy for a couple of weeks now and I still have a few weeks to go. My favorites are #1 Reese's eggs or mini Reese's cups (not discriminating where Reese's are concerned), #2 Cadbury cream eggs (I do not accept dissenting votes where these are concerned. My husband falls in the nay-saying category for this candy) #3 MY NEW FAVORITE! Nerds jelly-beans. I am generally a chocoholic and leave plain, boring candy for the crazies. But these babies are just the right amount of sour and sweet, candy and chewy ... I feel I may need to stock up before I can't find them anymore.

*I was starting that last Easter thought with the purpose of saying I am planning on cutting the candy way down in the Easter baskets (since we will have consumed so much pre-Easter) and instead ordered some hardcover books to add to our library. I chose Paul Zelinsky's Hansel and Gretel and Trina Hyman's Little Red Riding Hood. These stories are not sugar-coated fairy tales, but are true to the originals. Most importantly for me, the illustrations are truly art. I can't wait for them to come. (We already have Zelinsky's Rapunzel and Rumpelstiltsken and love them!)

*My "baby", Queenie, is so clingy these days. It's like she can tell an intrudere is fast approaching. Several times a day, particularly at times she has to be separated from me (like when Daddy is holding her so I can make dinner, or when I leave her with a sitter while I go to the doctor) she nervously asks, "Are you my mommy?" I always laugh a little, and tell her, "Yes, I am your mommy. I am always your mommy. That will never change." Smidget has started to tell her the same thing.

*I guess we will be finding out the gender of the coming baby in the next week. I've always been chomping at the bit to find out, but this time I feel hesitant. I can't explain it ... I think I will be thrilled either way. But my identity at this point is as a mother of girls. I really want another one. I guess that's weird--everyone keeps saying "Oh, are you hoping for a boy?" and the honest truth is kind of the opposite. I keep reminding myself that it would be wonderful to have a boy ... but gosh, these girls and their relationship with each other ... our whole family dynamic, really ... I just love it. My friends with boys all tell me how cool their relationship is with their boys and how they want that for me. The more girls I've had, the more I have realized how different they are from each other, and I don't know if so much depends on gender as we really label it. I have different relationships with each of my girls, some better, some more strained. I'm not worried, because I know I will be happy either way. But I will definitely have to do some emotional adjusting to make room for a boy! (Not to mention all of the clothes, decor, etc.)

*If I could only pick one dvd for my kids to watch/me to listen to in the car while driving, it would be Phineas and Ferb, hands down. That show is HILARIOUS and becomes more so on frequent repetitions. D bought a shirt on clearance at the Disney store last night with Dr. Doofenshmirtz on it. It says, "Trust me, I'm a doctor." Especially funny since he is one. :)

I just figured out how to embed a youtube video for the sole purpose of sharing this little Phineas and Ferb treasure. :) Enjoy!

Ah, a rainy day

The way I feel about a rainy day is always changing and, I've discovered, is relative to the weather that precedes it. For instance, not too many weeks ago the rainy days were piling atop one another, one after another, seemingly endless. They were depressing me--and the end of them could not have come quickly enough.

But today, I woke to the patter of drops on my roof and after several days of sun and warmth (I think it may have reached the 80's yesterday?!), those drops seemed soothing and safe--like a blanket. The sky is grey and the drops fall steadily and softly. It looks like it will be wet all day.

But spring is here now, and this rainy day is just one amidst a week of sunshine and birds chirping and life coming back to the world. We'll book-end it with walks to the park and bike rides and exploring. I guess I can't be gloomy in March ... only in January and February.

PS I'm making progress on my water goal ... I hope to put it to bed TONIGHT! and move on to my next preparedness project. More to come.

Thinking of Japan

I'm sitting here at the computer after a long Sunday at church. I just finished reading and watching the updated news about Japan. And I'm crying.

It is devastating to watch footage of the ocean sucking away an entire city. It's heart-breaking to hear accounts of families who were separated in the disaster, of the 60 year old man who was rescued on his housetop but saw his wife washed away. It's wrenching to see people waiting in lines for a water bottle--to hear they are living in the wreckage of what was once a home. It's also overwhelming in so many ways. How do you help people who are suffering so deeply but who are so far across the world? Chatterbox wants to send her stuffed animals. Not so sure how to start on that one ...

I have no answers. Our friends from years ago in dental school are currently stationed in Japan where he is just finishing his pediatric dentistry work with the army. She wrote of their survival experience on her blog. She also writes of some of the things she wish she had and will add to her preparedness stash.

That's where my mind is going at the moment ... what am I lacking in my storage/preparedness? (LOTS -- SO MUCH!) How can I remedy that? I'm starting tomorrow.

I'm posting this week's goal here and now so I have some accountability: This week I am working on water. 1) Moving our 55 gallon barrel 2) Filling it 3) Locating the pump and hose and attaching it to the barrel 4) Refilling the water in our 5 smaller (7 gal) containers 5) Purchase 3 Costco cases of bottled water. 6) Locate our water purifier.

That will be a good start, and manageable, I suppose, though I REALLY want to go buy a year's supply of food tomorrow. ;) That is not in the budget.

How is your water stash? Am I forgetting something important where water is concerned? Is anybody there?

And on the lighter side

I want to be back in the blogosphere--but I am obviously struggling to find much worth writing about. This morning I thought I'd share one of those tiny motherhood victories--a great idea that is simple to execute but makes life a bit easier.

Every morning without fail, my 5 year old asks if she can play games on my phone. My 2 1/2 year old also loves to play with it, so there is often bickering. I am not in love with the idea of my little ones being so phone-involved, so I wanted to limit their exposure, but I really don't mind them having it sometimes. I also have the age-old problem of kid-associated clutter slowly overrunning my home.

The solution? Each time the kids ask to use my phone, my standard response is now "Sure, you can earn 10 minutes of play time for picking up 10 things." Sometimes this is enough to put them off entirely without my saying no. But more often, they zip away, clean for a few minutes and return, hand held out eagerly in anticipation of zombies. or angry birds. or cupcake decorating. or whatever. I set the timer on the phone and when it beeps they have the option of cleaning up 10 more things to earn 10 more minutes or just being finished. Almost always, the little ones contentedly yield up the phone and run off in search of new amusements.

This has taken the stress off of me because I never have to say no (not that I mind saying no, but I feel like I am saying it all day!) It puts all of the choices on them and they can take some responsibility. Plus, they are getting used to picking things up.

Another thing along these lines--most of you probably do this... For a long time I have done the "15-item pick up"--in the middle of the day when things are looking a little messy I pause whatever we are doing and say "Quick! 15 item pick up!" We all run around and pick up our 15 things and then we are done for awhile. I think this works really well because it keeps the job small and manageable for the little ones. They can count to 15 and it doesn't overwhelm them. Sometimes I get ambitious and try for 20, but I get so many complaints when I do that, I usually stick with 15 (10 if Smidget seems grouchy). And then I might do that every 30 minutes or so until the house is picked up enough that I can breathe easy.

Now it's your turn ... what little tricks have you discovered to squeeze some extra help out of the kiddos?

Longest cold ever

I've had a miserable cold for almost 2 weeks now. I am starting to forget what life is like without constant sniffling, wheezes, and a nose raw from tissues. I thought I was mostly better and got up to run this morning. I only made it about 1/4 mile before stopping to hack up up some crud, wheeze a bunch, and send my friends on ahead while I walked - SLOWLY - home. It's hard to tell how much of my exhaustion is from being sick or from being pregnant. This pregnancy has, for the most part, been easier than my other 3 ... except for the tiredness. I thought it would go away during the second trimester, but for some reason (I'm hoping it's the cold) it has lingered on, leaving me feeling like a rotten mother and wife. I have an occasional great day (as I recorded in my last post) but so many, many more find me willing myself off the couch, or to do the dishes, or to pick up a bedroom. And thus my blog is tending to the dull, depressing and otherwise non-readable subject matter. I'll keep trying to think of something more interesting to write.

In the meantime, this is how life is at the moment, so I will just go ahead and record my sluggishness for posterity.

A perfect day

It seems like the best days of my routine life are the ones that start with 3 things--oh, and these are all accomplished before any kids wake up: first, dragging myself out of bed early to exercise; next, making time to read my scriptures or the Ensign; and last, getting showered and dressed. If the stars align and those 3 things happen, my day is sure to be awesome.

It happened yesterday. It was an uneventful, but somehow still a wonderful day. I got the house straightened and in order before 9:30; taught my preschool music class; delivered girl scout cookies; took Smidget to her swimming lesson; hit Costco and got an oil change all at once; fought and won the napping battle with Queenie; got dinner to a friend (it was mostly a la Costco, but sometimes you've got to pick your battles); helped the older girls make their leprechaun trap (oh the hilarity); made chocolate chip cookies; folded and put away the mountain of laundry in my bedroom; fed the family dinner (thank you Costco); had family home evening; and bought our tickets to Maui in June. And no TV for the kiddos all day. Whew!

Now it kind of sounds like I am tooting my own horn. I don't mean it that way. The fact is, days like these are about as rare as Halley's Comet (every 76 years or something?) It feels like that anyway. (And shouldn't they be celebrated?) For instance, today I woke up at 7:15 feeling my cold raging back--I can't seem to kick this thing!-- and decided then and there that I was NOT going to my 9:00 am class at the gym. Now it is almost noon, and my greatest accomplishment of the morning is the fact that I got Chatterbox to school on time. I am still bra-less, in my jammies, and am planning on counting this blog post as a "job" I accomplished. Sure, I've made a few beds, picked up a few scattered sundries, changed a poopy diaper ... I guess Queenie is dressed with her hair combed. I talked to my mom on the phone. (Do you feel the reaching?)

I wish I could feel like I squeezed the fullest out of each day. But I can't seem to muster the energy to do it very often. I'd love some advice from those of you who are getting it done more than 50% of the time. Because that is admirable! As for me, it's noon so I'd better pull it together enough to feed my little yahoos and take them to the park. I'll try to salvage what's left of the day. Hope it's going better at your house! Happy Tuesday.

Snow

Here is my life's chronology in terms of places I have lived:

Age birth-1 ... Salt Lake City, UT; dad in last year of med school at U of U
1-5 ... Iowa City, IA; dad in OB/GYN residency at the U of Iowa
5-24 ... Alpine, UT (Provo, UT; American Fork, UT); grew up, went to BYU, married, D went to BYU while I taught in American Fork for 2 more years
Age 24-28 ... San Francisco, CA; D in dental school at UCSF
Age 28-31 ... Ann Arbor, MI; D in Orthodontics residency at University of Michigan
Age 31-present ... Clovis, CA; here to stay!

I tell you this to establish the simple fact that I am no stranger to snow. I spent a collective 27 years of my life in climates that offered me a substantial winter. And you know what?

I. Don't. Miss. It.

Sorry, snow, I can absolutely do with you.

But the lack of it in our vicinity does lead my children to view it as magical ... indeed, almost mythical. In that sense, I'll admit that it is somewhat enchanting to view winter (and snow) through their eyes; for instance, when we go to Utah at Christmas time.

It's been a 70's week here. Sunny, bright and beautiful. We've been on bike rides, walks, and to the park. For a change, today we opted for an hour plus drive through twisty mountain roads, up and up and up in search of the mythical snow. And we found it! The kids enjoyed sledding (their first time, can you believe the neglect?!), snowball fights and general tromping through waist-high snow (knee-high for me). We stopped at D's parents' cabin afterwards to have a campfire and cook up some hot dogs and s'mores.

Another hour drive, fending off carsickness all the way, and we are home, cleaned up, and back in our snow-less home. It was a fun day, and I know I sound like a snow-Scrooge when I say this, but once a year sounds about right. I'll keep the flurries at arms length where they can remain magical and mystical--instead of cumbersome and tedious. I guess this means I am a true California girl.