Let's make a run tonight.

J has been forcing me to grow up so much recently because I was graduating and I was so afraid to go to work. It caused so much pressure that I couldnt handle, broke down at home and couldnt control my emotions in school. He doesnt spoil me, he just want the best for me even if I was at the verge of my emotions.
Thank god I have friends who cares- Rebecca, Daniel, Jing, Min, Adriel, Junious (esp the period of going Tampines One & Century Square for assignments, taking 969 just to accompany me when you could have taken 168, queuing up for koi& trying to beat each other's high scores, those were the times man; ended my BSC well) I failllll, junior caring for senior hahaha.

So anyway, I was kinda going nuts that J decided to give me a break and brought me out for waffles and ice cream that I was craving for and followed by movie- 127 hours.

I made him wore hoodie again lol. The way I wanted him to dress& we both like each other's dressing that day. So that makes us happy kidz hehe

He's gotten chubbier, that makes me pinch his cheeks all the time

wah I wanna eat again

Thank you for believing in me and pushing me so hard so I can grow

Sent me home after that and we had a long and good ol talk about life, friends, us, family& everything, I love advises and heart-to-heart-talk like that.
You've always been my greatest pillar of support<3

Date / Time : Tuesday, February 22, 2011 / 9:00 PM

Count down to number of school days left: 3

There's so many assignments to do everyday. Im finally done with Market Research report, there's still final BSC report left and Im done!

Last Saturday where I met J to do some research.
It ended bad but it is all good now.

Hehe I bought him similar hoodie! And I like it so much

eh? I've no idea what he's doing

Baiii!!:D

It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.
“— Nicholas Sparks

(-via runawaytrain)

Why do I always run away from something I want? I never run towards it, I just run from it and I keep running til it’s not in reach. I’m scared. I’m scared of the future, what will happen, what will change. Instead of just going for it and getting what I want, I sit there and think of the negatives or what could go wrong. That’s what makes me run and until I stop doing that to myself I’ll just keep running.

I love you, and I love that you care about what we have together. I’m glad we’re not the kind of couple who takes each other for granted. And that has a lot to do with you. You compliment me, ask about what matters to me. You show me in so many little ways that you care.
I’m happy we’ve never gotten too busy to make time for “us.” We’ve had rough patches, but we’ve worked through them. We’ve had smooth stretches and enjoyed them. And we’ve never forgotten what brought us together in the first place ― a love that was meant to last.

(-via poeticheartache)

Date / Time : Monday, February 21, 2011 / 9:38 AM

I'll be graduating in 4 days time. How time flies, 3 years of poly has past. I've walked to a path whereby I have to decide which direction to head to. I wouldnt deny that Im lost and confused. Im scare to explore a new journey on my own, for I've been relying on people way too much. From my parents to J, I know I have to be independent, take my first step and prove to my parents that I can stand alone, that they can let go without worrying for me all the time. Im nowhere near succeeding as much as my brother. Its sad to say, for the past 19 years of my life I've not accomplish anything. How sad and pathetic I know. Laugh. I dont even know how to manage my finance that my boyfriend has to worry for me. Im being forced to do up my resume the weekend after I graduate, look for a job the following Monday. I dont even have the ability to plan out my life.

I.am.a.failure.ok.

I just need some time, some courage, confident and some encouragement.

No one is ever proud of me

Im forced to grow up, I have to, right after I graduate. I have to be strong to enter the work society alone, to face new challenges in life.

I've always been relying on people, way too much

Sometimes, no matter how long or how hard you’ve loved someone, they’ll never love you back. And it’s sad, but no matter how much it hurts, you have to move on and be okay with that.

(-via eletheowl)

How strange it is. We have these deep terrible lingering fears about ourselves and the people we love. Yet we walk around, talk to people, eat and drink. We manage to function. The feelings are deep and real. Shouldn’t they paralyze us? How is it we can survive them, at least for a little while? We drive a car, we teach a class. How is it no one sees how deeply afraid we were, last night, this morning? Is it something we all hide from each other, by mutual consent? Or do we share the same secret without knowing it? Wear the same disguise?
Don DeLillo

The secret isn’t to find someone you love spending time with - I love spending time with a lot of people. The secret isn’t to find someone that you find attractive - I find a lot of people attractive for many different reasons. The secret isn’t to find someone who is nice - there are tons of nice people in the world. The secret is to find someone who wants exactly what you want. Someone who is ready to give you all they’ve got, and in turn be ready to accept all the love you have to give. The world is filled with people in relationship teeter-totters of “loves you more” & “I have to act mean so they will like me back” or “I am just not ready”. Please do not waste any more of your precious time. You are an amazing creature. You deserve to be loved until your insides melt. Don’t give up on all the things you want. When you meet the right person you will have zero doubt in your mind. Zero.

(-via poeticheartache)

Date / Time : Tuesday, February 15, 2011 / 12:17 PM

You don’t just love me on my good days. On my pretty days, when I have makeup on and my hair looks decent. When I’m cheerful and witty and affectionate and feeling well. You love me when no one else possibly could. You love me when I’m pale and hollow, when I haven’t laughed for days and I’ve worn the same pyjamas for a week. When I curl up in my little corner of the bed and try not to think about life. When I’m irritable and ugly and bitchy and I yell at you for stupid things. When my hair is greasy and I have bags under my eyes. Those are the times when with great patience and care, you brush my hair behind my ear, kiss my forehead, and tell me,’You’re beautiful and I love you.’ That’s how I know … that’s love.
“— Breanna

(-via eletheowl)

Valentine day was just another day. Not only did we do the usual stuffs like catching a movie (which made you half asleep & your rushed down to 7-11 to get me panadol cause I was running high fever in the middle of the movie), and had dinner at a place without aircon because it was too late and the mall had the air con switched it off. We quarreled on our cab home; the whole journey and I fell asleep while texting you. You were mad but when I texted you crying because I got scared coughing endlessly, I couldnt breath cause my mucus were blocking the path of air entrance, my tears were rolling down my cheeks cause I had the urge to vomit all the time while coughing and I was choking on my cough, you put down your ego and called me. When I was at fault and was in a terrible mess, you texted me ' I love you' and everything else.

All the time when you strive to give me your best- you want me to have what I want, you want me to dine at restaurants and cafes all the time, you never wanted money to be an obstacle in the relationship; when you feel happier buying me shopping loots than buying for yourself because my smile is so precious to you (& trained not to be overly materalistic), you pay for my medical bills and even asked if I have sufficient allowance cause you dont want me to starve and your favourite cheeks of mine to disappear. You dont mind me playing a bitch to the girl who fancy you in office. You planned my future with me because you want my first job to give me an experience and a reputable resume, its not the money that counts. You check my 20 over pages of report till 4am so I could get better grades. You update yourself with my twitter everyday so you know what I've been feeling, what I've been doing, what I've been thinking throughout the entire day while you are too busy for me.
No one could have love me any better. I love you boy

Date / Time : Wednesday, February 09, 2011 / 4:15 PM

How to Keep Your Girlfriend Happy

1) Maintain. If you did a bunch of cute things with her before, try & keep it up. You don’t have to go all out everyday for her, but don’t stop completely just because you got her already.

2) “Ladies first.” No. That rule doesn’t apply to communication. Don’t wait for her call, text, IM, why don’t you try talking to her first for a change ? It’s thoughtful & sweet if a guy can actually do that

3)Surprise her. You don’t have to drive an hour to her house at 3 a.m. to set off her name in fireworks in front of her window, but the little things are big things. A simple, good morning text, is more powerful than you think.

4) What insecurities ? For the love of God, all girls have insecurities. Please don’t point them out. For example, today I was looking at food & my boyfriend said “You eat a lot. You probably could beat me at a buffet.” WHAT. THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU SAY. Also, let her be herself. If she’s having a bad hair day, don’t make fun of her if it’s hurtful. Let her wear sweatpants & still feel pretty damn cute around you, even when she’s not looking her best.

5) Act the same around your friends. You’re not a real man if you completely blow off your girl in front of your homeboys. When you’re going to hang out with her & your friends you better not run off & leave her standing there to greet them like WUDDUPPP GUYSSS.. NO, you better at least walk with her & introduce her to them if you haven’t already. If you walk with her hand in hand, she’ll love it.

6) When she’s mad. Dude, you better try & get her back. Chase her, whatever it is, don’t let her walk away when she’s mad at you. It shows you don’t care enough to go after her. Don’t let her go.

7) One & Only. If your girl really doesn’t like one of your friends, trust, she has good reason to. Girls’ intuition -shrug- So don’t go hanging with your homegirl all the time if you know your girlfriend doesn’t like that bitch. She usually won’t hate for no reason. Respect her.

8) Trust. Honesty. If you lie to her, you’re going to have one hell of a time regaining that trust because she’ll start questioning everything you’ve said or done for her, no matter how small that lie was. Fess up or get lost.

9) Love her. That’s all

(- via rollingjade)

You had me. You had me and then you left. It has nothing to do with me, it’s all about you. And it’s always been about you: what you need and what you want. You know, it seems like you only want me when you can’t have me. You like the chase and that’s all. So you know what? You can have it.
“— The O.C.

Nobody should ever forget that: you don’t need anyone who doesn’t need you.

You should have a guy that makes you feel happier, not upset. I don’t think that’s too much to ask for.
“— Lauren Conrad

I don’t understand why so many people want to be perfect, including myself. You’re supposed to find someone who will and loves you for you are, and see you truly beautiful for yourself. But it’s so sad, we find ourselves wanting to be perfect and full in ways we can’t be because it’s so hard to find a person that loves you that way, wholeheartedly.

(-via eletheowl)