Spotify Playlist: He Wasn't Meant To Stay

 All of us at some point in our lives crossed paths with someone and felt something special; we felt so connected with this person that we thought they were “The One”. Unfortunately, things didn’t work out. And every time you think of him, you believe he was the one that got away. The connection was earth-shattering that shook your whole world and made you believe that you could never find another person like him.

If you can’t stop thinking about the one that got away, you’re not alone. I have also spent a lot of sleepless nights thinking of that person, wishing that I could go back in time and do things differently, hoping the stars would align and we could have been together.

But one day I came to the realization that there is no such thing as the one who got away, because the truth is he didn’t get away, he just wasn’t meant to stay. 

It’s really hard trying to move on from what feels like an unfinished relationship. We sometimes torture ourselves fantasizing how things could have been. And we can’t get over the fact that something so magical banished right before our eyes.

We waste so much time trying to find factors why everything ended because we don’t want to face the fact that it was not meant to be. We blame timing, circumstances, and ourselves. We are filled with maybes. Maybe things were moving too fast. Maybe he had too much going on in his life. Maybe he just wasn’t in the right place to be in a relationship. Maybe we will meet again in the future, and maybe then we will be right for each other. Or maybe I did something that made him leave. You have so many doubts, and you can’t stop yourself from thinking about him. You wonder what could have happened if the stars were aligned in the right place. Or the circumstances were right. And now, you find yourself heartbroken, feeling lost and confused, and all you can think about is on what should have been.

I’ve heard so many times that sometimes timing or the circumstances are not right, and that could keep you from being together. And quite frankly, I don’t believe that. I’ve been in situations when I didn’t think I was ready for a relationship, but when I met someone who I thought was special, I changed my mind quickly. It didn’t matter how messy or busy my life was at the moment, I made time and space for this person to fit into my life.

You see, people put the effort into people they truly want. A love that is meant to last doesn’t go away. The right man for you won’t push away when things get too serious. The right man won’t see your mistakes or flaws are deal-breakers. The right man will make himself be ready to be in a relationship, even if he wasn’t looking for one at the time. When a man sees that you’re everything he has ever wanted, he’ll stick with you. No one or anything will push him away.

Believe me when I say there is no such thing as the one who got away. You just met someone you deeply connected with and it didn’t work out at the end.

Wondering what could have been will only keep you living in the past. Believing that you can never find better love, will only keep you from finding the kind love that truly suits you—a love that stays. Let go of the past. Thinking about the past is not healthy. Holding on to someone who already let you go is not healthy.

Let him go. Stop playing scenarios in your head on how things should have panned out. Don’t waste your time and tears on someone who abandoned you when your feelings got stronger. Open your eyes and face the reality. Yes, you met someone special, and this person made you feel magic. You loved this person and wanted him to take a permanent place in your life, but he had an expiration date. He wasn’t meant to stay; perhaps he only came into your life to make you believe in magic again, to make you see that you are capable of opening your heart, and to teach you a lesson about love.

And remember, he is the one who got away because the right one is on his way.

Don’t Search For Love—It Will Find You

We all desire the euphoric feeling that comes from being connected to that special someone through a unique bond. So many people spend endless amounts of hours on dating websites trying to find their forever person. Many see love as a quest, as something you have to hunt down or it will run away from you.

We as humans crave control; we want things to work a certain way and at our own time. We often try to control every aspect of our lives, but love is not something that can be controlled. When someone is chasing you, either physically or figuratively, your automatic response is to run the opposite direction. The same scenario happens when it comes to love; the harder you try, the more evasive love is

When you look too hard, you run the risk of settling for anything. When you want love so desperately, you think you see the love in people too quickly, and that only places you in toxic relationships.

The truth is that real love must come naturally. You can’t hunt it down. You can’t plan it or analyze it. You can’t force it and you can’t buy it. You can’t make a heart feel something it doesn’t. Love shouldn’t have to be proven or won, it is a mutual attraction that organically grows with time. Love is not something you can’t simply make happen.

Although it is a very beautiful feeling to share love with another person, please don’t forget that your main source of love comes from within. The love you need radiates from inside of you, and eventually, you will find someone with whom you can share it with.

Stop wasting all your energy looking for love. Instead, turn all your attention inward. When you shift your focus, you will learn that you don’t really need to be with anyone to be of worth to this world. You will learn that you on your own have so much to offer in this life. When you are completely confident and secure with yourself, love will find you.

The right person is going to walk into your life when you develop the confidence in yourself to face this world alone with optimism and enthusiasm.

The right person is going to walk into your life when you learn that you don’t need another person to make you happy; when you learn that real happiness is always something that is found within.

The right person is going to come into your life the moment that you’re truly ready for them. You might think you are ready now, but that could be far from the truth. You have to do inner work and let go of past emotional baggage so you can make room for the right person to come into your life. Love won’t come any moment sooner or later. It may seem like love will never arrive, but you just have to trust in the universe’s timing.

Even though none of us really know when love is going to walk through our door, the only thing we can do is prepare ourselves to receive it when it finally arrives.

Until then, go about your life; continue to grow and evolve. Know that you don’t have to look for love, but you can attract love by working on being your best and truest self.

One day, just when it seems like just another ordinary day, you will come across the person that you’ve been waiting for all along, and you will feel your heart flutter; it is just like that love will come to you like an unexpected rainstorm, and you’ll find yourself dancing in the rain.

When love finds you when you least expect it, it will be the most beautiful surprise.

Which was kind of what I was experienced... I did not expect I will fall for A until we have common interest / same music taste and on the next random note bam we are together! We did not do multiple dates, nor we have the most extravagant "will you be my girlfriend?" proposal. It was purely within, and all we had was trust and communication all these years and true companionship. He was my best friend.

Through the night

Heartbreaks are emotionally traumatic, and it could feel like the end of the world.

Normally, there are a lot of coping methods at your disposal after a breakup, but being heartbroken amid the COVID-19 pandemic makes a heartbreak that much harder, especially since it does feel like it is the end of the world. Due to social distancing, breaking up during quarantine opens up a whole new level of heartbreak because you are confined in the four walls of your house and you have a lot of time available to sit at home and wallow in your feelings.

Whether the breakup was a long time coming or unexpected, the heartbreak that follows brings a debilitating amount of pain. You will have moments of intense sadness, and there’s no distraction from it. However, there is a silver lining to breaking up during quarantine. Yes, you read that right. What a lot of people do after a breakup is try to meet someone new quickly. By rebounding, you’re just slapping a Band-Aid on an open wound. You are hurt and can’t date right now, but sitting with your pain and letting yourself grieve instead of rebounding will help you heal faster.

Mourning the loss of someone you love is part of the healing process. The moments of intense loneliness are unavoidable. On days when you miss your ex, just keep in mind that if they were supposed to be a part of your life, they would still be there. This pandemic put a lot of relationships to the test, and if your relationship failed, then the relationship was not meant to last anyway; the fact that it ended meant that is the way that it was supposed to be. These crazy times made relationships end that could have taken longer to end under normal circumstances.

This ending shattered your heart, but this breakup unfolded perfectly for you, because every completed relationship is a step closer to find the love that is worthy of you. The truth is that every partner that you have isn’t supposed to be the one; dating is an incremental process that we must go through to move closer towards our dream relationship.

Love is a series of journeys in which you don’t know the destination. You don’t know what turns you will have to take and you don’t have control over how every journey will end. Every relationship is a journey—some are shorter than others, some are bumpier, but every end will lead you to the relationship that will be the end of the road.

This pandemic made the world stop, and going through a heartbreak alone could feel unbearable, but instead of dwelling on the past, use all the free time to work on yourself. Use all your free time to remove all the negativity from your life and shape a new future for yourself. Use this time to heal and re-enter society with a new perspective.

Heartbreaks are painful, but they also help us grow and expand.

I know that you are in pain right now, but if you can survive a global pandemic, you can surely survive a heartbreak.

1. It gets better with time. Don’t expect this to happen overnight. It will most likely be slower than you have hoped for. But day by day, week by week, month by month, it gets better with time.
   
2. Don’t contact them. Deep inside you know why. No contact is like the law of gravity when it comes to getting over somebody. Just don’t. You know why.
   
3. Unfriend, unfollow and block them on social media. This one is obvious.
   
4. Recover actively. When you get sick, do you just passively do the same thing as you were doing before you got sick? No, you take active rest, you go see a doctor, take medication to get better. Your recovery will be a lot faster if you build and stick to a productive schedule, set goals, workout and socialize. Be productive and implement structure in your life. It’s difficult to be motivated or inspired when your heart is wrenched. Build a schedule and follow it. Let it become a habit. Recover actively.
   
5. Look at the numbers. I know your breakup is an extremely personal experience to you but most relationships, even marriages, come to an end. It is extremely normal to fall in love, fall out of love, break up and get your heartbroken. How many of us are here today? How many more people will get their heartbroken this week? It happens to all of us and it’s an experience that most people go through in their lifetime. It’s not just you.
   
6. Miss her/him? Get used to it. The truth is that you’re going to miss them for a long time. You loved them and you shared your life with them. You are going to miss them and that is so perfectly okay. Even if the time passes, even if you have moved on, they are going to cross your mind every once in a while. Are you going to text them or cry about them every time? Missing them does not mean you want them back. Get used to missing them once in a while. And that’s okay.
   
7. Remember that this is your story. You are not some ex that got left behind. Your life is your story and you are the main character. Accept that the breakup is an end of a chapter, not the book. Carefully reflect on it and move on. Where they are, who they are with, what they do from now on, does not have a place in your book anymore. Your story continues. Live on.
   
8. Remember that life is short. Given that most people desire to find someone to fall in love with, start a family together and grow old with, we only have so much time to find that someone. The reality is that the breakup probably should remind you how difficult it is to find that person because your ex wasn’t it. Every day you spend in self-pity and grief is another day wasted to find your perfect lover who is waiting for you in the future. They won’t wait for you forever and life is short. When you are ready (emphasis on ‘when’), go out there and find them before it’s too late.
   
9. This is for her/him. You loved them, right? It’s over now. Probably for the best. Whatever the reason was, it was destined to end just like it was destined to happen in the first place. If the end was inevitable, aren’t you glad that you are the one bearing the pain? Let them walk away with a bit more ease. For me, I have loved her and I’m glad she didn’t have to go through what I went through. It is the last thing I can do for someone that I have once loved. Thinking this way gave me peace.
   
10. This experience will make you a stronger person and a better lover ultimately.

How Your Last Heartache Changed You (Based On Your Zodiac Sign)

Aries

Your last heartache made you more cynical.

Taurus

Your last heartache made you more insecure.

Gemini

Your last heartache made you more paranoid.

Cancer

Your last heartache made you more defensive.

Leo

Your last heartache made you more cautious.

Virgo

Your last heartache made you more vulnerable.

Libra

Your last heartache made you more timid.

Scorpio

Your last heartache made you more suspicious.

Sagittarius

Your last heartache made you more closed-off.

Capricorn

Your last heartache made you more selfish.

Aquarius

Your last heartache made you more sensitive.

Pisces

Your last heartache made you more protective.

-https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2020/02/how-your-last-heartache-changed-you-based-on-your-zodiac-sign/

How Each Zodiac Sign Screws Up Perfectly Good Relationships

Aries

You run away when things get uneasy.

Taurus

You hold onto grudges long past their expiration date.

Gemini

You keep secrets because you’re worried about letting someone see the real, unfiltered you.

Cancer

You coddle your partners and allow them to walk all over you instead of asking them to commit.

Leo

You act too demanding because you always want things your way.

Virgo

You use sarcasm as a shield and never talk about anything too deep.

Libra

You hide your feelings and wait for others to make the first move.

Scorpio

You prioritize work over your relationships, without a single exception.

Sagittarius

You keep trying to play the field when you should be committing.

Capricorn

You keep your heart locked away and never admit how you truly feel.

Aquarius

You start petty arguments because of your overthinking.

Pisces

You push other people away as soon as you get scared.

- https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2020/02/how-each-zodiac-sign-screws-up-perfectly-good-relationships/

Mood board

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