the past no present

the beanie that has long been put away

the once-favourite jumper that has been left behind in perth.....

the hair that i've decided not to do it again.

it jus looks too weird with rebonded frindge.

my still fav jacket that is growing a smell in the cupboard now.
it can never be cold enuff in singapore to wear that.

i din't do this. someone else did it for me.

the fat me that i've decided to put away PERMANENTLY.. hopefully.

the drunk everyone.
in the empty street of cold perth

hurray to working~~!!

today. is the most noting to do day ever in my 1 yr 14 days of work life.

i've never been like this before.

raining.. everyday aso rain.

my school

that is really my school. my uni. this part of the building is called Winthrop Hall. there's a duck pond in front of it. which obviously, can't be seen.

i've graduated from it for year. more than a year to be exact.

i've got my certificate, degree like almost a year ago aso. someting i realise today.

I DON'T HAVE MY TRANSCRIPT!!!

yes. i only realise it now. coz i need it to register for my cpa. i used to be an intern in my present company, so i tink they din't ask me for my transcript.

hence, sadly, only 1 year later did i realise I DON'T HAVE MY TRANSCRIPT!!

i need it soon. REAL SOON. coz the closing date is 15 jan, if not i've gotta pay 100 AUD more. and aussie is so slowwww. it'll prob take them like a month to post my transcript over.

horrible day

i had a traumatizing day

It has been a long while since such a senior impact on me. probably kinda woke me up. jus strong feelings of him that was placed into a conversation that make me have the

'wah-i-feel-like a idiot' feeling.

it wasn't anyting bad. jus probably he expressed it very strongly that shook me up, plus my 'not-so-intelligent' answer. he's probably categorised me under,

*senior points finger at me,'there, the one lor, the stupid one'

to all the seniors, i noe you're paid like 4 digits more than me, can u puny pls be gentle with me.

to all the juniors that are lower rank than me, U DIEEEE, nex time when i get promoted in hopefully 6 months time *cross fingers*

u see, we live in a vicious world. hence, there's this ting call THE VICIOUS CYCLE!

half a bucket of this half a bucket of other

summary of wat happened over the past week

my leave was finally over.

you noe the hooha about Tampines, The Premiere, where ppl queued over night. i actually got a queue number, 20, to be exact. and i din't even queue over night for it. hahahaa. coz my senior got for me the queue number in 15 minutes coz he lives opposite. but i dint get to use it in the end. sobs. kinda wasted. its jus not the right time.

i'm now on this japanese company for a puny week. before i left, there was this scene, this japanese boss was trying to tell this cantonese auntie, not to clean the table now coz he's expecting this client.

passer-by me, became the translator. the japanese told me in broken english to tell the auntie. i tot i've achieved enuff cantonese standard with all those hong kong serial.

BUT I WAS WRONG!!

i can't even tell the auntie a simple sentence,'auntie, can you not clean it now, coz he's expecting a client.'

ended up, i was trying to tell auntie in a mix of, canto, chinese, hokkien, and japanese.

i really dunno wat i'm toking in the end.

actually. i can't speak cantonese, not even half a bucket that i tot i could!!!!

blogger's siao leow. i can't post any of the pictures. sads. [see. on the left, i tried]

today is the last day. tml is THE DAY.

no feelings. i don't even feel its the day tml.

i don't actually feel like going tml, but if i don't go, i'll majiam waste my 1 week leave of trying to study. so i shall jus go and take it like a erm.. revision paper.

its disgusting. i'm going for an exam that i noe i'll fail. nevermind, wats failure, jus take it nex yr lor, not asif its the end of the world. crazy.

i tink jus 1 more yr for me shld be alright, i can't do last minute studying. it has always been other ppl copying my tutorials during uni days, constant studying is my way. but i can't do it now since i'm working.

i don't even get time off unless i take leave. like now.

the good?

AUDITORS ARE GETTING A PAY RAISE!!! muahrhahahahaha

nope. its till July for promotion. its jus a industry wide pay adjustment i suppose. coz everyone else is aso raising.

they finally realise we're paying 'dust'.

Come join audit!! its loads of fun!!!

er hem. of coz, in the expense of:

- time = youth

(on a average weekday, you spend around 16 hours at work, on a not so normal weekday, probably u'll spend 3-4 hours at home? but its kinda fun. hahaahaha)

ok. no more. hahahahaaha

AUDIT!!!!

tie ear ring

i'm so dead tired. had to force myself to wake up at10am.

its been too long since i last studied for an exam. and the fact that this is for interest sake. there is not push factor for me to study, and i'm doing it at a snail's place.

may i fail with flying colours. *yawnz*

how power am i

i woke up at 10am. the time now is 12:50. and i'm still not hungry!!!!

every morning when i wake up for work at 730am, i'll be starving. hope i'll gain someting from this leave. even if i don't pass, i'll lose some weight!!!

may i fail with flying colours!

may i fail with flying colours!

today. on leave for 1 week. to study for my going-to-fail japanese paper.

its like a normal currie hall exam week. jus that the place is different.
everyting else stays

the notes
the time
the laptop beside

i'm not so sleepy thou. and i've got a tv now. but no 12pm meals waitin for me. i'm not hungry now, but waitin for my stomach to complain so that i can pull myself out of the room to get lunch or breakfast, or watever. i'm jus too lazy. lazy lazy lazy. to go anywhere.

may i make the most out of this week. and fail with flying colours!

y can't there be 2 of me?

bday flowers

dnd time!~

my day~

the day that comes once a year.

Equinox
wat exactly are we paying for.
no. not the food.
its the window picture that you look out

as usual,
after appitizers
afer main dish, then did we manage only to take a picture of the dessert. haaha

the only couple pic we took. din't wanna look so sua ku. haha
ok. its suppose to be the flowers picture. but something happen as usual. not able to post. damn.
company dnd tonight! more pictures then!

mmm.. tasty shoes...

Its been a long while since I last did something like that.hahha
Time: 8:34pm. tuesday night.
Location: some chocolate building in shenton/raffles
Its gonna be a long long nite…

Favourite colours: nice pink. Not shocking pink.
Favourite food: depends. Noting in particular.
Favourite movies: changes as well. Probably 'walk the line' for now.
Favourite sport: not doing any
Favourite days of the week: saturday! coz no work and tml is not monday!
Favourite ice-cream: strawberry, raspberry, melon, etc etc. anyting sweet. Not chocolate.
Favourite TV shows: friends
Current mood: working at 8:39pm. How good can it be.
Current taste: mint
Current clothes: working clothes
Current desktop: lousy company hewlett that hangs
Current thoughts: go home before 12.
First best friend: can't remember
First crush: tink it was this primary school guy call benjamin (tats y my brother's name after him) or was it guoxing, dunno which one first.
First movie: beauty and the beast or home alone, whichever's older
First lie: too long
Music: chinese
Last cigarette: never had my first
Last drink: Life 100% pure distilled drinking water
Last car ride: gopal
Last crush: skip. Dunno how to classify.
Last phone call: joanne.
Last CD played: jay's
Have you ever dated one of your best friends: gopal!
Have you ever broken the law: littering?
Have you ever been arrested: nope
Have you ever skinny dipped: never categorised under skinny
Have you ever kissed someone you don't know: nope
Have you ever loved and lost somebody: nope. All still alive.
Single, taken or crushing? taken
Are you happy with your life now? Satisfied.
When you meet the right person, do you fall in love with him/her fast? Yes.
Have you ever had your heart broken? Yes.
Would you take someone back if he/she cheats on you? Yes.
Have you ever talked about marriage with another before? Yes.
Do you want children? Maybe. They're kinda irritating.
How many? 1
Would you ever consider adoption? Probably not.
If someone likes you right now, what do you think is the best way to let you know his/her feelings? Tell him.
What is the furtherest thing you and your ex did? Erm. Noting. Hahha. Next.
Do you believe in love at first sight? Not really.
You believe you can change someone? Don't tink so.
Have you ever wished that you could have someone but you messed it up? Maybe.
Are you missing someone now? No.

miscellenous thoughts

Irritating Girls

i watch movies almost every week. today was the worst ever.

10th november 2006, cinema 4, 9:15pm, cineleisure, seat 7 and 8 D. Material Girls.

the noisest pair of girls i've ever heard! throughout the entire movie, there weren't any 5 minutes that they weren't talking! and given that they were sshh-ed twice, they were still thick skin enuff to continue toking! not singaporeans. some thai or vietnamese. obviously its not in their culture to shut up in movies.

anyway, maybe its because of them, its not a very nice show. this is definately a better, funnier, conny-er no brainer show.

[Flushed Away poster pic that did not load after 2 failed attempts]

Premonition

there were obviously many thick skin ppl in singapore. which reminds me. that i used to post one that said Europe has ban and made it illegal for fakos that bring through their customs. obviously they either werent stringent enuff in this or wat. coz there're still ppl around doing it! Premonition: Newspaper headlines.

'Scholarship receiver, caught in London customs for bringing fake wallet.'

haha.

Facial

Ever wonder what can facial do to you? Please read this week’s issue of straits times’ URBAN. Ppl with big eyes, double eye lids, slim face, pretty features, I’m talking bout Fiona Xie. Who can really object to the fact that she’s ugly? Why is she doing facial with what she’s born with??!!?? Nope. I’ve never wonder why. And many other pretty ppl who obviously does regular facial.

*Amazed*

Women actually are willing to spend money to make themselves prettier when they’re already born pretty. Not to talk about ugly ones. I don’t actually mind being a combi of both,

Women who are willing to spend the money to make themselves prettier when I’m not born pretty.

And its not like its very expensive, if someone like me from such a less than average family can afford it, I don’t see why ‘ppl from above average family’ can’t. But also, they’re ppl with ‘self proclaimed inborn pretty features’ that doesn’t require such superficial additions.

TV Presenter

Yesterday night, I was watching 康熙来了, it's the episode interviewing a very famous tv presenter in Taiwan. And she was actually talking about this listener who called in a radio program that she was hosting, saying how bad she was and how much he hated her program.

She then replied, ‘Do you still have your fingers?’ or isit ‘Are your fingers still working?’
(can’t really remember wat she say, i’m not a recorder. But that's the gist of it.)

Listener replied, ‘yes’

Then she say, ‘Why are you still listening? Then switch channel.’

And she cuts the listener off.

Hahaa. Think you can find this episode in youtube. Youtube has everything. The presenter then added, it is this kinda of ppl, who will listen to your program faithfully, and will never switch channel although they hate you. Hahahaa. I tink I can so understand that. I suppose it's the same world wide. In Taiwan, in Singapore etc.

*Teh dengggggg*

wohooo. a birthday gift from josephine to josephine~!

*drum rolls*
Damier Azur!!!
it wasn't worth buyin a bigger one for this range. coz the strap and the handles will turn dark, and it'll be a huge contrast to the light body. so i got myself the puny one.
its irriatating when the LV ppl are hard at work, coming out with new range so fast. and emailing me!!!

today, during my japanese class break, i went to the receptionist.

me: so when does the application for the JLPT 2 class starts?
(fyi: i'm currently taking JLPT 2 and the exams' in 1 month's time)

recep: it's already started. classes are starting in Jan, saturday's class is already full.

me: can you please put me in the sunday class for next yr.

recep in a very puzzled look: aren't you currently taking it now?

me: yes. but i tink i'll need it nex yr again.

hahahaah. i'm so prepared for nex yr. its gonna be the same sensei too! he's quite good. jus that i'm lousy. haha. who cares. for the record.

- i got a lousy 227 for my PLSE, which ended me up in my 6th choice of school
- i failed my A levels GP
- i took my basic theory 3 times
- i took my practical 3 times
- i'm on the way to failing my first time of JLPT

so? wtf with good grades? life's not about good grades, how many ppl are there who're from better schools but is also drawing the same pay, doing the same kind of shit. i'm so proud of my failures above. ok. not SO proud. but at least i've got my driving license. i'm still working in a reputable company ultimately.

so what if my bf got retained in secondary school normal stream, retained in poly, what is he now? com' on, get a life. there's definately more failures to come, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. never heard? dumb ass.

my life is not about how much money i can bring into my grave when i die. its not about how mnay A stars i got in my entire life. i noe yours definately is.

i've gota strong hindge that i'm gonna get another mail tml. hahaha. you noe how some ppl jus love reading my blog. then i'll have more to blog about too!

mMMMmmMMmmmmm.......

Coming in stores tml~

Damier Azur!

the shit dropping job

they're gonna have a wage adjustment (obviously upwards). when are we having our turn...
isn't it suppose to be the same across? you know, when they say there's no push factor to leave, doesn't really mean there's no pull factor.

lets forget about bonding sessions for a strong sense of belonging.
forget bout the tree top walks.
forget bout the drinking party sessions.

this is really not working quite well in view of historical trends. focus on the pull factor. look on the oni reason why ppl are leaving:
- for more money, ppl are doing less shit, plus better welfare.

apart all the whining. i'm still here. haha. moulding my own shit. not really enjoying it, but haven got enuff to suffocate me, jus breathing in the stench currently. but i sort of enjoy the process of trying to catch less shit. in addition, also enjoying the process of hiding from my secretary, she's been chasing me like police and thief for the unit fund that has been long over due for 4 months? hahaha.

above all the whines. this is a good show to catch!

i've actually drafted long ago. post that are continue episodes of the poem 'We Understand' aka WTF. but there've been no mood to continue doing it. maybe i'll jus be too lazy to do it, maybe i'll jus do it tml. but i'm from no top schools like raffles. can't really do out a poem overnight. with the standard of my neighbourhood school, i'll probably need a year.

why did i include the paragraph above. jus in case the commentator for my blog is getting bored of keep reading my blog and getting disappointed.

happy anniversary again~

its anniversary time again!

the only occassion of the year are birthdays for us. hence, no presents. when we meant no presents, it actually mean, ' it'll be nice if ya can get me a card'.

haha. but i din't get him anything nor a card. coz was kinda busy.

apart from that, we went for a anniversary dinner~!

that was the oni do-able thing. at chijmes, this brazilian restaurant inside. was yummysssss. not too bad i suppose. meaty meal.

our present to each other was: to give each other a meal treat. hahaha

means we're splitting the bill, coz its our occassion. it was a agreed upon decision.

no, he did not walk half way and turn back to ask me to pay him my share.

my giant card. its those real big kind.

inside, was another card.
i got him something like that before. either for vday, or his bday, or the previous anniversaries.
and i really like such 'story' kind, colourful cards!

why am i still in audit

good things bout audit:
- don't have to reach work on time every morning
- lunch starts at 11:30am, and ends at 2pm
- offpeak, long lunch, long tea breaks everyday
- 2 months of leave all at a go

bad things bout audit:
- meetings only start after 5:30pm
- half of the year you get to go home oni after 12am
- you get older faster than what your age says
- you can't plan your weekends too early
- you hardly get cute guy clients. they're either aunties, or aunties-to-be. out of my almost 1 year, i've oni seen 1 cute one out of so many
- your manager expects you to be awake and efficient with the minimum amount of sleep

things that are questionable:
- why do they like to plan meetings after office hours!!??!!

bed time. it's been a while since i came back at wee hours. li-ren's gone shanghai for course. but good thing is he'll be back soons. yips!

From: fiona zhang [mailto:horizon_gal@hotmail.com]
Sent: Friday, 13 October 2006 10:24 PM
To: Xie, Josephine
Subject:

shouldn't have bothered myself with any replies just now. my apologies.

yes you are bothered. emailing 4 times a week. how not bothered can that be?

my horrible face

jus caught The Departed. Its exactly the same as Infernal Affairs. Exact down to some lines even!

the following that i'm gonna blog about, is not anything to do with The Departed.

jus to prove that this is not the first time i'm talking about this:

9/02/2006: Inner beauty is not in the trend
10/11/2005: Ugly women?

jus came back from kose facial. the beautician always remind me, stil lotsa dead skin = rough face. nah. i'm alright with that. as long as it 'looks' not so bad.

i've got pores the size of toothpicks.
small eyes.
single eyelids.
ugly nose.
ugly lips.
sparse eyebrows.
fat cheeks.

i'm born with all of the above. and yes i'm not born pretty for obvious reasons. i don't get to choose my features.

clinique, bobbi brown, fancl, kose, chanel, all the shopping centres with the 1st floors filled with beauty and cosmetic counters. they're striving for obvious reasons.

Lets take the obvious M.A.C. they're opening and expanding, real fast in Singapore. Considering they're not leaving the industry any time soon, we can safely presume they're not losing money and ppl are still buying.

Extract from Estee Lauder Company Financial Statements, in just a quarter(thats 3 months jus in case nobody knows), they are making a gross profit of $1,093USD Million.
Assuming there's 31 days every month, they're making $12USD million EVERYDAY.

thats how much ppl don't believe in cosmetics and facial.

facial features can jus be like that. but. accept it, they're part and parcel of women's life. try getting married without make up. take wedding pictures without make up.

eyeliners can make eyes look bigger.
mascars 'awakens' the eye as well.
dry lips? lip gloss.
uneven skin colours? foundation.

people used to ask me bout the products i used. not that i've got wonderful skin, my skin's kinda like shit. rough. pimples. open pores. but for some reason or another, ppl still ask bout the fancl products, wat they are for, etc etc. why not stick to house brands instead? since facial features are so important.
oh, i'm into kose now. but still not rich enuff to convert totally to them. so its fancl-kose in the mean time.

artists, models, actress all whom have big eyes, wonderful skin, pretty features. why do they need all the make up with those features?
lets jus start with ppl walking around in shenton. whats with their make up then?

yes yes, again, i admit, i'm the ugliest with the ugliest features, no amount of make up can hide my horrendous face. but i still like to put lehhh

again and again

again and again i told ppl not to read my blog if they don't like wat they see.

i blog about my LV bags, show off if you wanna call them.

i blog about the clothes i buy. yes, showing off again.

i blog about my taiwan trips, my bkk trip, my life in perth.

above all, its all a blog of how i waste money and how i ended up trying to find a rich bf from perth.

there's noting you can do to stop me from blogging. but you can jus don't read. tink even xiaxue say that so many times. don't read if you don't like. if you don't like, why are you still reading?

fingers got problem? or laptop spoil? will auto come to my blog page?

again and again i've also told you not to email me. i'm already ignoring your mails. ppl jus like to email me, teach me what to do with my future husband, acting like a phsychaitris (wrong spelling i noe), analysing how inferior i am. singapore has jus run out of ppl to award scholarships to.

you have a blog too. but i chose not to read it. whats so difficult bout that?

above is not a poem call 'again and again'.

i jus realise i made it seems like a poem. but its not! although the pattern is a bit the same, where the title is 'again and again' and every paragraphs starts with 'again and again'. but no lah. i'm very academically inferior. i'm not from any top schools or jc, no scholarships, no uk honours, sucky life, no good old daddy, no love from family, don't go home.

does this make you happy?

A poem from someone so constantly concern about me

everyone has a choice of not reading my blog. even if u set it as your homepage.

someone sent me a poem, from a smart scholarship receiver. to a fail A levels gp person like me.

probably i'll share with you.

From: fiona zhang [mailto:horizon_gal@hotmail.com]

Sent: Friday, 13 October 2006 4:34 AM

To: Xie, Josephine; brothertong@hotmail.com

Subject: We understand.

A poem for everyone...

We understand how those makeup and facials are important when you are born with just a less than average look. But maybe they don't make much difference when your facial features are just like that..you just learn to accept some are born prettier some are not.

We understand how terrible it must be to be born into a less than average family. Money is very important so you just grow up needing those material needs and also a rich guy.

We understand how inferior it must be be constantly compared to someone in all aspects of your life, including academically.

We understand how costly it must be to have a wedding at a luxury hotel and the need to trim the guest list. Maybe not everyone is interested in going. We also understand that with a groom looking like that, it's best to limit the guests. (maybe MY Bernard will scare off the guests! haha)

We understand how family is important to some while less important to others. Some just love going home to a family filled with love from a good old daddy while some others don't go home to one.

We all understand.

saturday of fog

today. we finally applied for the place that we wanted. but its like striking toto coz of the balloting thing. the showroom was DAMN LONG QUEUE. so many ppl there, but so little available. really need to go mosque, church and temple to pray. hais.

finally got it today!! although it's still 1 month away from my birthday. but still.

it come in not only a dustbag. but a pretty box!!!
me n my long awaited precious~~~~
update of the family...

the trip to...

Bintan~~!!!!!
the cast
not yet. oni reach bintan island.
this then is Nirwana~~
welcomed by a indo dance
they don't let us check in until 3pm. and we were there at 12pm.
the weather was horrible. horribly dark. and rainy.
finally sunday the sun is out~!!!! beach~
to be continued....

lazy

i feel like blogging. then i logged in. then i don't feel like blogging again. i logged out.

i logged in again coz i feel like blogging again. in the end i din't

now i've blogged. but this wasn't wat i wanna blog about.

i'm too lazy to blog wat i wanna blog about.

so i din't.

miscellaneous

my new bag from mango!!!

someting new each week keeps me going~~ bleah bleah~~ muahrhaha

we've got a new toy couple of weeks ago. this is free.

ohh.. this is free too.
erm.. i must say.. this is free too. they say it'll cost 100 plus to put 2 ugly eyes on the poor wall..
ok. above all the free tings. we had to pay for someting.
tv in the room~~!! *note the scv box too.. muahrhahahaa