Friday, September 07, 2012
idk why...these days i've been feeling so uneasy....idk why...rawr maybe cos i miss bf too much...rawr...seems like when he's busy he kinda dun really bother about me..and i dun like it but then again, can't blame him..hes a chiongster mugger...argh...gt to get used to him being busy when im free...duno y our timings always dun match. every time im free, he's busy...o wells..arghhh...emozzzzz =(
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
It has been exactly 1 mth since i posted. loosing the feel to post, but...i guess i just need somewhere to let it out. rawr. during this 1 mth, lots of news came to me. good and bad..i kinda lost my motivation to work and study for some reason. i tot after my results come out favourable, i would be more motivated, but, sadly, thats not the case. maybe its cos of the changes i need to adapt to in the future thats hindering me. it may nt exactly be a bad thing, but im just resistant to changes. haiz..idk..i need to get my act tgt again, but i just have no motivation. seeing bf try so hard, i also knw i have to try hard, but, why is it so difficultt!?!? y is it so difficult to get it back again? =( am i really suited for this job? is this really for me? y am i nt performing well enough? rawr
haiz..outside of work...some things have been bugging me, but i knw those things can't be rushed. sometimes i wish the ppl arnd me will understand also. i really don't need extra pressure on this la..haiz..i gt to stop emoing and be happy...if nt life will be dreadful...
haiz...somehow...this dosen't feel right? the feeling is different...why?!?
haiz..outside of work...some things have been bugging me, but i knw those things can't be rushed. sometimes i wish the ppl arnd me will understand also. i really don't need extra pressure on this la..haiz..i gt to stop emoing and be happy...if nt life will be dreadful...
haiz...somehow...this dosen't feel right? the feeling is different...why?!?
Saturday, July 28, 2012
its been a long time since i spent a whole saturday at home...lonely i guess..but managed to do abit of revision. rawr...miss my bf so much! rawr...
mixed feelings abt some stuffs lately... dilemma...hard decisions to make...and horrible after taste from that particular event...haiz...its been almost a week and the thought of it still feels so horrible...haiz o wells..guess its sth i have to deal with on my own cos no one else can help me...i just hope i can erase that horrible memory..or rather, rewind time, so that i could change my actions then that wouldn't have happened and i won't be feeling the after effect. o wells...
but, whatever it is, i'm really thankful the wonderful friends who have been there for me to listen to me complain and give me advise. thanks alot
mixed feelings abt some stuffs lately... dilemma...hard decisions to make...and horrible after taste from that particular event...haiz...its been almost a week and the thought of it still feels so horrible...haiz o wells..guess its sth i have to deal with on my own cos no one else can help me...i just hope i can erase that horrible memory..or rather, rewind time, so that i could change my actions then that wouldn't have happened and i won't be feeling the after effect. o wells...
but, whatever it is, i'm really thankful the wonderful friends who have been there for me to listen to me complain and give me advise. thanks alot
Friday, July 06, 2012
its been a long time since i posted...but who cares right? not like anyone reads this space anymore..haha
work has been torturous...its becoming more and more dreadful....everyday im just waiting to get off work..rawr...idk...all my motivation is gone...i can feel it..i can feel that my work quality is decreasing and boss is more and more disappointed with me...idk..not being able to perform well at work sucks...rawr...so disappointed with myself...i feel like giving up..idkk..the string is snapping..haiz..its supposed to be off peak but..stress wise...its more than peak..arghh...shld i just leave? =(
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
rawr....when im busy i wanna play..
when im free..i still wanna play..
i wanna go out..
i wanna hang out..
i just wanna chill and have fun..
bleahh but..i guess..some things..once lost, can't be gotten back =(
o wells..pretty envious of ppl who have so many close friends to hang out with all the time, while i have almost none...o wells...whatever happened to bffs? its all a big fat lie lor i think...haiz..o wells..the difference between a full time student and working full time..o wells..i guess one will not understand this pain unless one goes through it..bleah..
alright..tats all for now..the web is getting boring..my hp has no msg from bf...o wells..he's out having fun again so no need care bout me...o wells...bleahhh =/
Thursday, June 14, 2012
wheee exams are over!! hahaha it didn't have a good aftertaste, but....o wells...its time to have fun this weekend before i start work again!! hahahaha wheeeee can't wait to hang out and have fun with bf tmr!! hehe :D
but the bad thing is...im back to work on mondayy and lessons are starting the first week of julyy..goshh so fast!!! bleah..o wells..hope everything will be fine when i go back to work....rawrr...
hope i can sleep tonight..rawrr....2 consecutive nights of insomia is crazy..i almost fell asleep during exam...gosh...
o wells..its over!! hahahaha :p just hope i can at least pass both these papers!!
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Haizz...when this convo comes out..the topic is changed so quickly..4 yrs n counting..yes I miss my piano..haizz when will I stop feeling emo about it?? Sucks!! I miss staying in hougang...I miss the friends n ppl there...I miss gg to nativity...bleaahhh o wells 4 yrs flew by.. I thought I'm ok with it alr..but no!! I miss being able to meet my friends in juz 10min or so..like how bf can now..I miss duets with Maureen ...I wanna play piano again...haizz will I get the chance to start it again soon?? :(