life/live (sort of) updates

Oh gosh! I remember I used to update my blog like every other week. But seriously, with work, I’m too lazy to switch on my lappie once i reached home. Everyday, I'm facing the PC at work and I’m online makes the eyes tired to continue facing the lappie at home. So I guess with the free time in between work. I can make full use of the unwasted time to actually share my thoughts and updates in life.

Ok, first up! Updates! Updates! Updates!

I’ve worked for like 2 months already now. I’m waiting to be a confirmed staff after the probation. Hmm, another month to go. Moderate working environment, I guess. I’m not too choosy. When it comes to office politics, just gonna keep my mouth. Thank God, Charlyn is also working with me. Hee! At least I got member. =]

Oh, my maternal grandmother passed away a month ago. It was kinda shocking to see my grans go coz she was healthy after the op until the day when my mum’s sisters, the filial daughters decided to take her when she wasn’t fully recovered. (Anyways, that led to another story) Also, my Mak Long, eldest aunt, paternal side, lost her life to uterine cancer. =[

On a happier note, my dear BFF, Nur Suriani got engaged to her dark knight in shining armor, Mohd. Hee! Personally, yes, I was again shocked with the news. Things happen so fast and changes in a blink of an eye.  Oh! Another friend is planning to tie the knot too but not sure when. But I’m not too bothered by it because I have a somewhat-repulsion towards her. -.-“

As much as I’m happy for Sue and I attended her big day to celebrate her once in a lifetime day, I still don’t like people asking me these questions so here’s how I reply.

Q: So when’s your turn?
A: I don’t know.
Q: Aren’t you getting engaged?
A: No.
Q: WHY?!
A: Coz it’s a waste of money.

Then they start babbling all the traditions and saying that I should do at least a small one. Yada, yada, yada.. NO! As much as I want to since everyone is doing it and it looks fun, I SINCERELY DON’T FEEL THE NEED TO DO IT AND WASTE MY MONEY!
And when the time comes to get married, WHICH I HAVE MILES TO GO, then I will start thinking about it. Thanks to someone who wished me GOOD LUCK because Boyfie & I have many miles to go to the next step.

Hmm, what else? Oh yes, I’m graduating this Thursday, 27th May! Woohoo! The robe’s waiting for me to wear it. I really really hope to spend this joyous day with all my family members and also him. But my minah sister is working, and then the boyfie will need to rest after an operation. =[ Hope he get well soon. He’s removing his “button” from his back.

I guess that’s all for updates. It’s pretty much boring because I’m working full time now. But I spend loads of time outside especially with the ‘gang’. Yeah, Nana’s working too. Faizal got a new job. Boyfie pretty much stayed at the same place. =] SO! We’re all now working adults. (Yeah, we weren’t adults even when we were in school) -.-“ –inside joke.

p.s really pissed with some people.

lifetime commitment

Is there something wrong with the relationship?
I can’t seem to find any reason why you’re doing that.
I know you’ve assured me with what you said yesterday.
Is there anything you don’t like about the relationship?
We’ve been through this a lot of times.
I know I’ve promised to lose weight but you may think or see that I’m not doing nay effort.
But I am. I’m trying to cut down my food intake.
I know I did a lot of mistakes and bad decision for this relationship.
Have you gone bored with me?


Or maybe.

I should just stop thinking about it.
He said it was just for fun. No more to that.
I’m still the one he turns to everyday.
Hopefully, there’s no exchange of contacts or emails or whatever shit.
I know he’s not ready for a commitment. I can’t say I am.
Financially wise obviously not. So marriage now is definitely out of the question.
Mentally wise. I really don’t know. Yes, I want to be with him until the day I die.
But mentally ready for a lifetime commitment? Marriage with kids? I don’t think so.
I am committed to him but to take care of him and fulfill my duties as a wife and a mother. I don’t think I am capable of doing that. I can’t even support my parents yet, let alone myself.

I’m sure I can say for him also.
(to make myself feel better)

heading to a new journey tomorrow

woohoo! so this is how it feels to be carefree! free from obligation of studying. i've spent (23-6) 17 years of my life studying! and now i'm free!!! wooooohoooooooo!!!

---------------BUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

as of tomorrow, i'm a working adult. yes! monday morning take the crowded train to work and anticipate the weekend to come soon! the drama of working life is back but this time, its for real! the internship was temporary and there was A last day to look forward to. now? it's permanent! yes! in the words of Oppa, WELCOME TO THE WORKING HELL WORLD!

orh, astoundingly with the given negative, bad feedbacks and reviews of friends who did audit during their internship, i actually applied for the position of audit assistant just to try my luck. it was the only one audit position out of the hundreds that i applied. yes, the rest were all a/cs, admin, bank officer. i guess my luck was at the only special one and i got the audit post. lucky me huh?

even though with the negative reviews, i'm actually excited to start! haha.. of course, at the same time, i'm so f**king nervous that my clumsiness would affect my work. argh.. >_<

ouh, it was decided that i will start on Monday after my results for the last semester is reveal which is on 19 March! THIS FRIDAY!!!!!! but my future employer called in and told me to start TOMORROW!! but still my results will determine my permanent post with the firm. no, the firm will be kept confidential. i don't want you all to stalk me! hahahahaha!

scared la! nervous also have! how?? i very kancong spider!

so hopefully with this new job, i can officially support my dearest parents who have been working hard for so ever long. AND!! get some shoes, new clothes, hairstyle, make up kit, facial products and wat nots la. =)

what's keeping me awake. outrage, outburst!

ok, ranting time. some random tots why are there so many men cheating.

(p/s: this is in the bgr context, not the marriage kind of cheating. i know cheating is still cheating. if u wanna read, go ahead. if u think this is crap, WAT THE HELL R U DOING HERE?!)

its gonna be some random sentences that is playing in my mind right now.

most men talk to random girls behind their girfriends. its a fact, i asked most of them.

how come men likes to talk dirty with girls. it turns them on? crap. i think they're delusional.

like they say "actions speak louder than words". go figure.

men are just so full of lust and all they want is to satisfy it. if they can't get it, it hurts their ego. yup, all men.

girls show off their small tits to get/lure men. they take pictures of their small tits and broadcast on their profile page of a social networking site. to me, they're sluts. no wonder these men who sometimes i call them cee-koh-peks are interested in these sluts. seriously, cee-koh-peks date sluts for the fun of it just like how they use condoms. use and throw. oh i forgot, sluts have no pride.

one thing i dun understand about men, is that if they want to get to know, like literally, ALL the girls in this world. WHY THE FUCK YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND IN THE FIRST PLACE?

they say they love u, give the moon and stars and other what not shits and yet, simply loves to talk to other girls. so the girlfriend for what?

so if the excuse was like, "hmm, just a new friend to talk to." then the girlfriend is mute, deaf, dumb is it? she can't talk is it? and 'coincidentally' the girlfriend saw the conversation between the boyfriend and the new friend. very flirty and dirty conversations. is that kind of conversations are between a couple? pardon me for being sensitive here, but hell! its rather pointless for the relationship.

i bet the men must be thinking. "there must be a reason why the boyfriend is cheating. maybe there is something wrong with the current girlfriend". maybe, maybe not. if he cant take it, then leave her, why stick with her and let her bleed? maybe she has become uglier/fatter by the years they had been together. maybe he saw the real her, her attitude is so bad that he can't take it anymore. then an easy way out, LEAVE HER!! or if u really love her, sit and talk and discuss the issue, NOT CHEAT BEHIND HER BACK!

u know, man would never know how much a woman has cried for him. unlucky for some women, even when they mentioned it, the man can't be bothered to know how much the woman has cried for him.

but then again, on another note, women cheats too. damn. its true. this is reality, people! some women does it to get attention from other men since they couldn't get any from their bf. or for some, revenge towards the bf since the bf is also cheating. which of course, leads to a never ending problem. dumb asses!

ok, i feel much better letting it out but i'm still not sleepy. darn!

jeans for sale!

i was clearing my wardrobe and found extra jeans that i don't need. so i'm selling them for 20 bucks each. negotiable. both size 29. they're still new. and i haven't wear them before. ouh, Esprit jeans, btw!

both are boot-cut jeans but different colors/tones.

lighter tone jeans

front view

back view

floral designs

full front view

full back view

(focus on the jeans not anywhere else, i lazy to edit)

darker tone jeans

front view

back view

esprit logo

full fnt view

full back view

anyone interested, pls email me or for those who have my number, sms me!

=)

happiest girl tonight!

ok, this is very random but it really really made my day. Oppa and I have been arguing about acknowledging each other at FB. i still wonder why his status is single when he's with me. ok, that's beside the point. but anyway, with his wall post today shows that he's single BUT NOT AVAILABLE!!! yessssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he left a very very sweet wall post at FB! i love this kind of surprises. out of the blue. i know its very random but he's not the romantic sorta guy, if u know what i mean. i even made a print screen to tweet about it and now i'm blogging about it. sorry, its in malay. i'm lazy to translate but 'cinta' is love. so, obviously proclaiming his love to me. ^_^

hehehe.... i know la, i know la.. i'm so full of myself, wanna show off my boyfriend proclaiming his love whatnot but it's not as bad as some people who says "i love u, dear", "oooooooohhhh, my poor baby" or mushy whatnots every day and proclaiming in public, that is, FB. anyway, i'm still shocked that Oppa did this. really! now even got another people commenting. ok, i'm so happy.

as in the song of SNSD's OH

Oh Oh Oh o ppa reul saranghae (oh oh oh oppa, i love u)
Ah Ah Ah a manhi manhihae (ah ah ah a so much, so much)

flu bug

my flu bug is not going away. got it since i was having exams. the jelly is really irritating after i blew my nose. it stretches like cheese from a pizza. hehe.. i know disgusting.

i'm gonna diligently eat the medicine from now on.