beautiful beethoven

My thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved
I can live only wholly with you or not at all -
Be calm my life, my all.
Only by calm consideration of our existence can
we achieve our purpose to live together.
Oh continue to love me, never misjudge
the most faithful heart of your beloved.

Ever thine
Ever mine
Ever ours.

"you in my soul and system"

9/11-1/18-5/11-*6/9-4/12-*5/13

notice a pattern? lol
smh that i can say "lol"
about a situation like this.
but a bit comical no?

but, c'est "la fin"...pour maintenant.
je t'aime hier, ce matin, ce soir, maintenant, demain, et toujours


i will write more often, je promis
mais...la semaine dernière...ooof
it hasnt been my week, i have not
been in my right element...give me a few days!!!

its been 3days
and i dont even
know that
you still care.

sunday words

if you know me well enough, you know
i am far from religious
and far from a "christian"
not that my ways are sinful and
uncharacteristic of the religion's preaching,
i just have not come to terms with christianity
or religion for that matter, on my own


these past five days have been hell
to say the least, not only have i been dealing
with relationship issues, theres my mom, school,
friends, planes, etc all kinda shit has happened...

but its ironic that i find reassurance and solace
in the christian bible at a time like this

"love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. love never ends"
-corinthians 13:7+8

you

for the one who showed me how to love
for the one who opened my mind
touched my soul
and stole my heart

how can i pretend
like i go on everyday
with ease, when all i want
to say is...

i love you

for the one who is my other half
i should not feel like my love
MUST be silent, my heart still
and my emotions erased.

they still exist
and you are the only one i can
express them to

my midnight loving

i am conditioning myself to love from a distance

to love
with passion
loyalty
fervor
committment
angst
patience
excitement

to love fully
and freely
him, my only

to love from brown
little toes, to the top
of my black thick
natural
wavy bun

to love the memories
the moments
of every touch
hug kiss and stroke
to love the silence
the laughs the tears
and ear to ear smiles

to love you

to love from within
so that it pours out

and while i cant tell
you each

and
every

single


moment of the day,
every brand new morning

every scorching, few clouds
afternoons,
every frost chilly evening


that I Love You

know that i don't,
because i love you
more and more
each

and every
day.

so the love i have for you
yesterday is no longer the
same with each waking up
with each sun rise, that love
has magnified, growing strength
in its mere existence,
anticipating our reunion

tis true what
they say,

distance makes
the heart grow fonder


for one i was already fond of. whose love i already possessed and whose love i embraced and whose love i had captured, how can "this" grow fonder one may ask? and that answer lies within the heart itself.


je t'aime "bj"

my body, your body, the black body

i have been so fascinated and intrigued by the stigmas, connotations, and the labels surrounding the black body, in particular the black female body because i am just that, a black female.

saartjie bartman, now if you do not know who she is
please...inform yourself
but i am doing a project on the mystification of whole wheat bread, and the racial/ethnic metaphors that are attached to it...and it wouldnt be fair for me NOT to mention ms.bartman.
while researching this afternoon, i found this video with spoken word on youtube...take a look


it puts beyonce's rumpshaking, niki minaj's genitalia, and trina's "baddest bitch" mentality in a context black america is clearly not ready to handle face on. these women could use a thing or two from picking up a book, and probably would keep some clothes on and their dignity in tact.