the nicky quan

Have you ever wondered why guys get into fights more often than girls? While it may be true that levels of testerone lead to increased agression, but more so that we think we have the ability to win fights when necessary. I openly blame movie producers and their warped sense of reality in fight scenes. Their ability to cast a veil and delude us of how incapable we really are.

Anyway, I'm not the nicest guy around and certainly not the least violent, so I've had my fair share of fights, but NOTHING comes close to this one. It wasnt even FIGHTING to begin with. It was just, well. boys being boys.

Anyway, nicky hit my fists VERY SOFTLY, as I was attempting to punch that gay, and I suddenly felt pain. Initially I thought it was just normal impact pain, however after sitting down at starbucks for a while, the pain didn't go away and my hand looked weird. So begins another one of my awesome nights.

The pain wasn't going away, and by now my friends concurred that something was terribly wrong with my hand shape. I tried to bend the thumb back inwards but it simply wouldn't go back in, and I couldn't really move my thumb properly. Eventually took a cab down to see a doctor.

The doctor took a look and confirmed it was a dislocation and asked me to go to a hospital for x-ray. I thought it was a simple "snap-it-back-in" as in the movies, so I asked that he try without the x-ray. Pain ensued. Take my advice if you ever find your body parts out of shape. Ask for a freaking jab.

He succeded, in causing me pain, thereafter refering me to the A&E with a much redder thumb and nothing fixed. So off it was to NUH A&E where I must highlight the quality of healthcare in Singapore public hospitals.

I arrived to the A&E to see one of my boxing coaches bleeding all over. Apparently he had a bike accident nearby. Long-story short, after an hour, the queue didnt move AT ALL, and I was still the 14th person to see the doctor. So I went to ask the nurse, who gave me typical "dont-know" answer. Apparently, you have to wait about FOUR FREAKING HOURS in an accident and EMERGENCY.

"Oh you have heart attack? Sorry, the queue is long, can your heart stop beating for an hour?"


Four hours in this kind of pain is a clear no. So I called up a few other hospitals (yes, with my OTHER hand) and decided to go to Gleneagles, where it was TEN minutes. So the doctor at Gleneagles did an x-ray and decided to give me a jab for the pain.

me:"Nurse, so where the injection? wrist or arm?"
nurse:"NONONO, THIS ONE CAN ONLY BE DONE IN THE ASS"

FML #1.
Injection Count: 1

The jab wasnt really useful as I still could move around after that. The feeling is as if you're a little inebritated. So the doctor came and started to crack my thumb back. Since the jab was weak, I felt all of the pain. ALL OF IT.

doc:"I don't dare to do it any further, I'm calling the specialist"

FML #2.

Specialist arrives in 30 minutes or so, and examines my hand. Then proceeds to give me TWO injections on my right hand.

Injection Count: 3

After 10 minutes or so, I totally couldnt feel my right hand. It was as if I was holding someone else's hand when I felt my fingers. So he began to crack away at my thumb, while looking at me and smiling. After a minute, he stopped and looked at me. This was when he gave me anonther smile and I knew it was over.

FML #3

An hour later, I was on the operating table, worried sick because of movies like AWAKE. For the uninitated, its a movie about people not being given enough anasthesia or some other reason, stay awake during surgery and enjoying every last cut. I requested for the doctor to administer extra, but was of course denied. He did however, stab me with 2 more injections in my left hand.


Injection Count: 5

It was like an instant flash, and I awoke to see my hand bandaged and feeling groggy. Like a smash-cut in film. According to the doctor I've been given another jab while asleep in my right armpit.

Injection Count: 6


My mum told me she was worried sick. Apparently what was estimated to be a 1 hour surgery became 3 hours due to complications. Now instead of a simple dislocation I had a 6 week healing time and a wire stuck in my hand.

The following pictures were taken by my awesome specialist during surgery. I will advise you NOT to look unless you are looking for help with your diet.




The x-ray of my thumb


A surgery was needed to remove the small ball (a bone) that got lodged in my thumb socket, preventing the surgeons from pushing the bone back in.



Z marks the spot



Cutting it open

The fork-like thing u see is called a "cat's claw" and the while thing is not my bone, but my tendon.


The second-cut

Apparently they couldn't reach the socket, so they had to make another cut. Yes, thats my bone.



More blood

Testing to see if all works well

Oh did I tell you the best part? The $10,000 bill.

FML #4

30 minutes.

my longest dry spell. ever.

So happens I half an hour ago, I was on the computer when *poof*, everything stopped working. Not like in a PC hang-and-restart kind of way, but like a blackout. Maybe most people wont notice a blackout but my study is noisy as hell, so when the power goes off i'd know.

Anyway, flashing back, I recall a notice from HDB about a scheduled power cut off for maintenance, and realised I was going to be off for an hour. Nothing worked - fan, air-con, PC, tv.. nothing worked. Going out of the house would mean coming back roasted in the weather, and if the power was cut there was probably going to be no lift. It's like entertainment died. We are so fragile in this world of cement and stone.

It's not easy. Sitting still is hot, moving around makes it warmer. You cant open your freezer for ice or there goes your week's groceries. Maybe some slow breathing will help? Tried. Gets warmer. Slow-cooker anyone?

It was pretty much a challenge. 15 minutes into a power blackout and I was ready to give up. I did the most sensible thing - I used my laptop.

Minutes later, the power kicks in. 2:00PM.

longest.thirty.minutes.ever.

Just too good?

Hmm, I've been thinking for a while.. but could it be because I'm just.. too.. good?

The Chef

After having a Jamie Oliver moment; I decided it would be a good idea to cook dinner.


And so I got a few recipes with decently easy-to-find sounding names. Next off its to NTUC to buy. I mean after all they're supposed to have everything there right?

It was only the beginning of more nonsense to come when I couldn't find the leeks and decided to ask if spring onions were the same as leeks. Apparently NTUC didnt sell leeks, so I had to make do BAH.

Then they didnt sell lemons too, WTF.

After clocking in a 83 dollar bill for dinner, I decided I will apply to be DBS's CFO, my strongest merits being able to save costs.

Next it was on to cooking the dinner. While the instructions seem fairly simple to follow, they are actually submitted by a heartless person with lie after lie. Clearly stated on the instructions were to allow the soup to cook for 20 minutes.

I left it for 20 minutes, and when I opened I saw only potatoes and carrots, but no soup. It was then clear to me that the wok was absorbing water and my potatoes were chao-tared. Next to make the Hollandise sauce.

Instructions were to stir butter into the yolk syrup while heating it over a saucepan of water. More lies ensued when I realised my concoction was turning into scrambled eggs.

Dinner was served with half-cooked salmon on bottled thousand-island sauce. The only thing I couldn't destroy was the salad, which was.. well, impossible to overcook since no cooking was necessary.



Another excellent dinner by Chef HL.



Where's next on the menu?

A Fear Long Forgotten

I've never really been claustrophobic, hence it never really occurred to me why my nightmares usually involved elevators. It may be strange that I've decided to divulge part of this weakness of mine, but it's really more to convince myself of the vindication.

Most of the time, lift buttons fail to respond. They would either malfunction, jam, accelerate upwards at an unfathomable speed, or simply: free-fall. In a good number of times; a supernatural flavour would be fused in. My block elevator stopping randomly thanks to kids enjoying block-catching didn't really help.

Just this morning; the lift button of the last floor refuses to light; stopping in every other floor. (It was one of those older lifts which didnt have buttons for every floor) Timothy manages to sneak his way in as we're going up the lift. (If you're very confused right now; yes I'm describing the figments of my nightmare) Next; we discover this spirit thats following us up every level. Stopping on the second last floor the lift doors open to reveal the spirit trying to rip a key apart from its keychain, saying out loud that "the keychain can help destroy a part of his soul". I grabbed him and dragged him along with us.

We bolted for the stairs, when we met one of the residents in the block. Asking her for a receipt (I know right?! WTF) I burned it and pressed it against the spirit's face. Apparently this is SUPPOSED to kill it. Next, the resident offers us a vacant unit beside hers; but we refuse and head up to the last floor.

Minutes later; a few other friends joined us and we're watching this... weird soccer game, where they're like 4 teams playing at once. The full-length windows on the left allowed me to see what was in the other unit below... Dogs.

The dogs were... staring at something invisible, you could tell because of their eye movement, the way they paid attention and turned their heads to it. Of course this had chilling effects on my spine. It starts to get better as when I looked again, some of the dogs disappeared, then reappeared while others disappeared. Somehow I made a very wise comment that the "dog was a very unique breed, able to change colour size, and appearance at every look"

I never really understood why I was having these nightmares, and it wasn't particularly a bane. Of course I do get free parachuting trips when the nightmare decides to free-fall my lift. So happens I was (not dreaming) testing the endurance of my block's lift the other night on my way home. Doing synchronised jumps to achieve maximum momentum and finishing off with a finale of a deliberate impact jump. Nothing happened.

This made me recall of a time when I was.. trapped, in a lift. It wasn't even like my cousin and I were playing hopscotch in the lift. We just pressed the open button long enough to piss the lift off, before it decided to close the lift doors shut and render itself immobile. Naturally my aunt was panicking, but under the age of 10, I was outdoing her.

Postulations of the numerous probabilities began clouding my thoughts, none of which are very pleasurable. Included in the list are the cables holding the lift snapping; resulting in a free skydiving trip. Lift running out of air,etc.

Of course none of those happened, and the rescue workers came in about 40 minutes. The whole experience was, intriguing, as the lift had those glass panes to look into. So much so I was pretty sure my relatives enjoyed viewing us as preserved museum exhibits through a glass door.

Looking back, its been like.. 10 years? I guess child psychologists are right for once, horrid experiences while young can carry a rancor into adolescence.

Mehboo!

WOOO~

War Execution

Bodies littered across the fields as fires seemed to burn from the haystacks; A wooden cage housing people hiding for their lives, waiting for a chance of escape. Blue uniforms marching alongside their hell devices that cloud the air with the scent of death. It was a savagery of war.

From the sky, it remains of the village looked not different from the mayan ruins; scarce of water and life.

The door breaks open as they march in; verbally arresting me.

"Heil!"

Strangely, I forgot to finish with his name.

Like an arrest in the olden days; a decree was read and I knew it had arrived; The End. The commander lined up his men whom were seemingly new recruits; so young they approached the proximity of "cadets". One of them thrusted his bottle at me,

"Any water?"
"Does it look like we've any water left?"

The commander shouted for the cadets to arm themselves with a mixed array of rifles. Included in the arsenal were notable hunting rifles; M16s and other out-of-date machine guns. He then motioned for me to step ahead.

I wondered at this point if it was a worthy cause for death; pledging allegiance to one whom seemed so lost in his thirst for conquest that he is blind to the imminent defeat and suffering of his countrymen. What made things worse was dying by his men. Serving the country sometimes meant you had to go against it; Treason.

"Could you join in?"
"They look like they would miss"

Trying to guise it as an attempt of mockery; it was my fear for a tormented death. Getting the commander himself on the gun would be an insurance for a quick death.

"I would; but I have this back problem"

He sprung out a knife and looked as if he was offering it as a solution. It made me ponder for a second how death by a blade would be any different from a bullet for his back.

"Please..?"

He didnt seem to hear and continued to quieten the squad down; whom by now seemed to have raised their decibels like a group of unattended school children. It didnt seem to work. He picked up two guns with one hand and fired them towards the ceiling.

The earth came crumbling down on my face as I could almost taste the dirt. It was almost as if it was my last supper. It worked like a charm as they fell silent. Silence is a bullet; not golden.

It was the end of the road; I walked forward to meet D. I wanted so badly to profess in my last words the love for Germany. I looked them straight, quiet with pride. Deep down; it was more of fear.

"SET TO AUTO!"

Voiced the commander. The cadets seemed like a novice bunch; but they moved fast. I could barely make out what the commander was shouting before it hit me.

Shell after shell of bullets; knocking me backwards to the ground.

It hurt less than I had imagined, but the pain was still nothing like what I've experienced. It was like metal balls pressed hard against your chest and torso. Then the next wave of bullets came and I was knocked further back.

It hurt alot less this time; and I could hear no more. I didnt even feel the third wave.

Laying face down on the floor; I could feel the liquid flowing out from the pressure points left by the bullets. Like a movie; it faded to dark and I felt no more.

6.30 AM

It seemed so real, was this how death would feel?

Rebirth

Due to my incessant free time at IAP, I've found a grand opportunity to give my blog the revamp it very much deserves. (Haven even bothered to fix those music player thingys)

Press F5 now.

Viola~

**PS: I have an Easter Egg for you Brian (puppy too), F5 enough times to find it..**