The Backstage

You grow up, you learn that the world isn't as innocent as you think it is. Every move calculated whenever possible. The trials and tribulations that you observe in people around you, veiled in secrecy at times and yet ever so rarely, you see one's true emotions. It's all in their eyes. You hold back, uncertain if it is true and then it hits you like a tonne of bricks - the windows to one's soul does not lie. Glistening. Awaiting. Hope. Fear. Anger. All within. Their pupils dilate, the canopy rises and you are sucked into a once impenetrable fortress of one's inner spirit. A whirlwind of emotions flood back into you through that very split second you made eye contact. Vaguely you dig within searching and linking the vital ques that you've just witnessed within those windows. You found it, you reel in horror, dismay, pity, sadness and a sorrow that is shared only by the heartbroken and dismayed. And then it all goes back to normal where everyone plays their roll that they have to play in such a cruel world where the actors and actresses live out their life performing for everyone else to see. Melancholy fills the air as the mood swings from one pinicle to another. Everybody laughs, everybody is pleased. And the void to ones soul closes just like the curtains on one's stage. Look past the curtains you may not but yet as the winds and seasons change you would often get to see slithers of "inner souls" be they be brief or to truly wrap you with them and allow you into one's backstage. Nobody said that one's backstage would be neat. To be human is to have a backstage that isn't surgically neat. If one had such, one would be likened to artificial intelligence. Precise, unfeeling, cold. The more you go through life, the more props you accumulate. The less you organize, the more you lose your mind. Perhaps letting someone in isn't a bad thing afterall, to clean one's cobwebs and skeletons. To put in place active organizational systems so that one may see clearer. A path straight to the heart is what I lack. A path that I am finding ever so desperately. A journey to travel before I die. To travel the distance into the deepest back stage of one's heart and soul. To be lost within embracing arms. To watch the world from someone's backsage is what I truly wish for.