Lacking focus

With less than a month away from my big exam,
I'm without the doubt still feeling panicky (tired), worried (tired), and fearful (tired) of it.
I have been practicing hard everyday, even if it's just one song through, after work, between classes etc.

Hard work does bring some results. I can see, and i can hear myself being better each time. HOWEVER, i just can't seem to focus when I'm playing for my teacher. My mind tend to wander around, thus ending up with mistakes, silly ones.

I think i need to practice more in the mornings. I seem to play better at night after work. Maybe i need to practice with a 'just-up' brain to train myself since my exam is in the morning. GOSH.

I NEED TONICS! Maybe?

to blackmail bf...

HAHAHAHAHA!

feel so empty

empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty empty

Have you ever

Have you ever felt if your feelings are just not what you think they are?
Or have you ever felt that certain events happen for a cause or for a reason, to help you grow and make you a stronger person?

I'm glad for every bad and wrong thing that happened to me. Sure, there were bad moments but it's only life. What makes you stronger is how you move on from it, and continue with life, continuing to make the best out of it.





This is super random.....

WAKE UP CALL!

It's already 5th of May 2011!!
I have like 4 more weeks to June and that's if my exam is even in June.

Damnit! I'm such a lazy-ass and my whole life, i procastinate.
But i do really regret now! I wish i realized it earlier! Guess i shall have to buck up and practice hard for my coming recital exam.

Seems like there'll be more recitals coming up even. I'M SO FREAKING DEAD!
Shall stop all my meet-ups with my friends and just practice and practice everyday after work :(

Anyway i have already enjoyed myself in Phuket in mid-april....
I promised to work hard and i should really start now, however late it is.
I know i can do it and play well, i just have to get to doing it. *shitty feeling*

*****

Can't wait for my recital exam to end soon.
I thought of picking up dance again.
I used to learn ballet, but i stopped.
Used to do chinese dance, but that stopped too after Secondary school ended.

I feel like learning ballroom dancing! My auntie used to teach me when i was young.
Arts, dance and music has always always been my passion. I guess i was born artistic.
I can't study for nuts sake; forgetful.
I can only DO things. Sometimes God is fair. He gives some, and he takes some.


*****

I wanna dive again. I think i've forgotten all that i've learnt... I'm so dead, i need a refresher course haha!
It wasn't enough in that past 5 days in Phuket just April.
Why do i have goldfish memory?! :(

(Hate my mom's genes......)
Have not had enough of diving!! :(

*****

This post is just so random.
Have been shopping online ALOT no thanks to Sweetie Tan!
Sharing F21 purchases and letting me know about free shipping from ASOS.


But, but, i'm a stringent shopper! I only spent $39.45 from ASOS with 2 dresses! Of course i source and dig for the best and cheapest sale deal!

Imagine this! For just $12.55!!



The material used is definitely more than $12.55! But of course i've yet to receive it so just pray hard that the material is good.

The back of the tunic is so openly sexy too :D



$12.55 It's a STEAL!



Shirt dress with drape sleeves for $26.90



I would pay for unique-ness. Enough said!




And i would continue to blab random things but i'm just lazy, plain lazy....

*i promise not to buy anything from the stores......*