Randomness.

My posts are getting further and further between, aren't they? Well, I think that can be a good thing. That means that there isn't much drama in our lives and I just don't have much to say, right? We are just plugging along every day, doing the best we can with what we've got. This is what I can come up with for a blog:

--School gets out June, 8th. I am quite nervous about what we are going to do until June 29th when we fly out to Utah. I am slowly making a list of things to keep us busy and hopefully out of trouble until then. CAN'T WAIT FOR UTAH!!! Mountains/camping/pine trees/cool weather HERE WE COME!!

--We sold our car to raise funds to buy a house here. FL has some crazy rules with home buying, so it is probably a ways out, but there are some rockin' deals here that are just too hard to pass up. Plus, Ben's employee is our landlord which has been just fine temporarily, but that dynamic just isn't going to work forever. Meanwhile, I am glad we live basically next door to the grocery store and I enjoy walking. So, it hasn't been to dramatic so far to be without a car.

--I was so excited that my SIL who lives here in FL (Gainesville, to be exact) had a baby girl last week. I was priveleged to be the first family member to hold her! I haven't been the first in our family to do anything for such a long time since we have lived so far away for so long. SM LOVED that baby so so much! She followed Auntie Becca around to keep an eye on little Naomi--it was really cute. The boys came in, took a look at the baby and were good. It was so fun to hold a teeny tiny little baby. It is crazy how fast they grow up.

--We have been so lucky to live in a ward with a ton of youth. Every Saturday for the last month we have had an Eagle Scout project to help with. It is such a good experience for DB to go to these! We have lanscaped the church building, made cards for the Ronald McDonald house, painted benches at the high school, and cleaned the church building! I don't get much "Saturday" work done because we are out on Saturdays (we reward ourselves for our service by going somewhere fun afterward....like Kung Fu Panda 2 yesterday...) but it is worth it.

--DB has been working hard at school and scouts and we hope to pass off a lot of scouting stuff this summer with Grandpa Kidd in his "man cavern!" He has made a couple good friends in scouts and has learned a lot. He was disappointed that there hasn't been a scout camp out yet, but Ben took him and JT on the father and sons campout where they were able to shoot a real gun, use a bow and arrow and go on a canoe ride! There is a huge LDS Cattle ranch about an hour and a half from us that has a camping area that was very nice. They had a great time apparently because they came home FILTHY!!

--one last thing.....While the boys were camping, SM and I did what all girls do when the boys go away--we went shopping. More specifically, SHOE shopping! Let me tell you, it is quite different going shopping with her than with the boys! It was SO MUCH FUN!! She pretty much tried on every shoe in her size (don't we all) and modeled them for a bit, and eventually settled on the "most girly pair of shoes" Ben has ever seen. They were tennis shoes with pink flowers and sparkly laces. We also got some pink sandals for church. It was hard for both of us to narrow it down to only two pairs of shoes!

We are gearing up for a fun summer with (hopefully) lots to do and learn. We really like living here and are quickly becoming Floridians! (Below 70 is a bit chilly for us already....) Feel free to laugh at us when we are in UT.

Mother's Day

As I tucked DB in to bed last night, he asked if I could stay and talk with him for a minute. We were talking about random things and then he asked what he was supposed to do for me on Mother's Day. This prompted me to tell him abuot my very first Mother's Day. His birthday.

I was scared to death. Special circumstances aside, I assume it is that way for many, if not all, mommies to be. So much responsibility, so much worry, guilt, pressure....just so much. I had a 3 month boot camp on mommy-hood. We had around the clock training by a specialized nursing staff. Training on HOW to do everything from changing diapers to feeding to changing dressings/tubing, bathing around the equipment, massage (only for him, unfortunately...) and many other things.

That training didn't take away any of the worry/guilt/pressure but it DID make me more confident in taking care of him when we made it home. And we DID make it home. We survived. I am still learning a lot about that experience. We are actually still in a mommy-hood boot camp. Every day, I learn new things about how to take care of my little munchkins. Each one is different and each one has taught me something new. I don't think that the worry/guilt/pressure will ever go away (anyone? anyone? have you managed to snuff that stuff out??) but as I work through it every day, we all get closer to "making it home."

Just as when we were in the hospital, our whole goal now is to Make It HOME. It isn't easy, and there are setbacks which sometimes seem devastating. There are daily achievements that seem so insignificant but can carry a lot of weight if appreciated appropriately. Being a mom is the most rewarding/aggravating/inspiring/ soul crushing/amazing job there is. C.S. Lewis said "The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only - and that is to support the ultimate career." I have chosen the ultimate career. It didn't choose me. Somewhere inside of me, I knew that I could do this, and I hang on to that knowledge every day (usually right before I want to wring some necks!)

I am so grateful to all the mommies I have had in my life. My Mom, Mom-in-Law, Grandma P, Grammy and even friends and relatives that have inspried me to be better. It is interesting that as we all just go along doing our best, we have the capacity to inspire others without even knowing it! How grateful I am to each of you for just doing your best. That is all we can do and that is all that God has asked us to do. While I have been a bit nervous to go to church today to hear about amazing moms and all they accomplished/are accomplishing, I promise myself that I will be proud of what I am accomplishing too. My children are healthy, happy and have little budding testimonies. They love each other and they love me. They are respectful and kind, patient and forgiving, funny, smart, thoughtful, and charming, although MAYBE not all in the same breath! They ARE still kids after all!!

I am an imperfect mom, but I am the perfect imperfect mom for my kids, and they are the perfect imperfect kids for me and we are all working on making it home together.