soooo sleepy..

wasted my time watching arsenal play sheffield.. most brutal match.. literally.. sometimes i wonder, do i really support arsenal because they play pretty or because they are hte only team in the EPL that is actually playing football.. ok i give credit tt man u deserves to win the league because they are actually playing footie n can handle the aggressive nature of the game n even with a relatively star-less lineup, their consistency is sth arsenal can only dream of right now.. chelsea.. whats a team tts just abt their stars? stars tt arent shining so brightly might i add.. but the likes of drogba n terry and just unbeatable.. so wth was sheffield doing? granted the goal was an error on our part and good thinking by nade.. but heck the rest of the time it was rugby.. and the referee was so lenient.. i cud vomit blood.. or rather, our players would considering the amt of damage we received on our end. there has to be some serious reeducation of footie & I demand a red card for ugly brutal footie or refunds on good money paid to watch a terrible match.. heloo JOGA BONITO for goodness sakes..

hmms speaking of chelsea, i got jiahan chelsea calender for the secret santa.. i really thot he supported chelsea because he has their jersey! turns out he supports fulham.. :{ oh well but he says he still appreciates it cos he supports them when they're winning.. ironically for me, chelsea drew fulham yesterday.. ahhahahha.. my secret santa was daniel.. which was a bit anticlimatic because.. jon chen showed the present before he even called my name.. ok cos it wasnt wrapped ahha.. its a GUESS gift card.. and its literally a card.. haha.. very pretty.. and its a pretty cool gift actually.. more shopping here i come! hmm was too paiseh to ask whats the value of the gift card tho.. so what if i buy sth tts 100 bucks and only 5 bucks is sponsored? haha.. ill faint.

so slept abt 3hrs before going to masjid.. i know i shudnt be saying this kinda things but aiya.. its nice to see guys my age in baju kurung even the mats.. they look very adorable :) i shud spend more time at masjids then.. esp since they ought to be more alim haha.. hmm or mebbe its the lack of sleep tts playing with my imagination :) need. sleep. now.

feeling like a farking slave

post festive syndrome? heck.. didnt even have a festive period to begin with.. now im all grumpy and annoyed... and feel like just screaming vulgarities at the top of my lungs.. i loooove the weather! (not to drive in) but i love splish sploshing ard.. i love how cool it becomes and snuggling in front of the tv with a blankie.. but im just sooo frustrated tt ive had no fun fun this hols.. sigh. n to top it off, i feel like an insanely broke slave tomorrow.. all i want to do is just go to jons house tom and play intense amt of mahjong, laugh till i cry and just have some good fun.. instead of trudging away to the other end of the island.. :( responsibilities SUCK and ive abt had it with doing a balancing act at home.. im a slob, blob and whatever nots ending with obs.. rarr..

fereaking beautiful

when arsenal gets it right.. they GET IT! interestingly, watford who is the one playing the major aggressive football and busuk tactics are the ones getting their players injured and limping all over the field.. serves them right..
and walcott & baptista are the most brilliant super subs ever..
and the little celebration between all the players was so cute! persie was carrying walcott cos u know he's only 16 and prob damn light.. then fabregas came and patted walcott on the head.. so cute.. its a funky family of all shape and sizes.. with walcott looking like the tiny little brother n a family where they marry young: persie is married and fabregas is engaged wth!

**412 peeps i managed to rummage some videos from days yonder :)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=L8_AU3hGCZM
theres more where tt came from!

the only person you can depend on..

every family has their problems they say. i dont like the tension and fear. i hate that when you grow up you realise that so many adults are actually not growned up at all. its all just maths. somehow, i am suddenly conscious of how i have become who i am and my principles. dont u ever wonder, if you grew up in a whole other environment, would you be you? or there really is no you because you're subjected to yr environment. I hate the fact that i know that if i had been brought up in a propaganda-filled world & hating others because they are different, I would be just like any of them. I wouldn't think what I'm doing is wrong because... there is no me. its all of what ive been conditioned to think.

maybe its just all the alias addiction that ive been thinking all this kinda nonsense but well as for new years resolutions.. i think i finally set myself one after years of laughing them off.. im ready to get to the next stage in life.

& i hope arsenal is too :) and that the 6-2 thrashing sends a clear and loud msg to all other clubs.. BEWAREEE! we'reee baccckkkkkK!!

today was supposed to be a whole expedition to the east..
starting off with a bang greeting mi amigoes 'fresh' from Argentina..
damn i miss u guys..
*note: you're officially faster than their postal service
hurry up catch up on yr jetlag so we can meet!

AND mi ordenador portabil is finally fixed! muy feliz. no more motorcycle sounds, no more viruses, n its finally PORTABLE again.. mwahha.. i lived with a non portable laptop for like 2 mths.. madness..

fabregas clone - the stars are getting younger & younger

this is FREAKY but pretty cool too.. was checking out the other coup from barca - Fran Merida.. playing for the reserves team against spurs.. with the blurry video, he was a splitting image of fabregas.. plus he is wearing the no. 4 jersey.. not to mention he wears a 'diamond' earring (when he's not playing) but his talent is pretty amazing.. the free kick he took, excellent.. and it seems he left a really good impression & impact.. I'm kinda worried tho that if Arsenal plays merida n fabregas tog.. itll be pretty to watch but defence will be SHIT! we need to buy a gilberto clone then since who else will wanna do the dirty work of a pseudo full back? wenger n his scouts seem to be really good at finding clones.. theres a persie clone coming up.. walcotts the henry clone (just see his amazing goals agst Germany in the U21) clichy's the cole clone.. oh wait.. the other brazillian youth midfielder will be the gilberto clone.. sigh! but itll be pretty awesome to watch all tt pretty football.. speaking of which i was totally screaming 'what a damn pretty goal!' at gudjohnson's goal agst Cup America.. it was so chioo from the pass to the final strike.. even more than a sweet fabregas pass.. n tt says alot..

oh and i found another vid on youtube tt interviewed fab, merida & torres in spanish.. n some pple tried translating it.. could pick out some of the words, but the person translating what torres said was obviously joking!
torres says : "fran, cesc, help me! have a word with mr wenger, persuade him i must play for arsenal, i couldnt bare having to play for man utd or chelski, i hate my atletico madrid kit also!" spastic!! haha but with my limited spanish knowledge i cud only understand bits n pieces of what fran was saying and zilch of what torres n fab was saying esp since they go at like 100words per min. mas despacio por favor!

fereaking backache..
had a mudbath today.. weee... an unintended one tho.. stupid kallang had to rain intermittently leaving us with a perfectly muddy field where pple slipped backflipped and splattered mud everywhere.. well mud is good for the complexion no? haha

why do the gd stuff come when i leave? itll be pretty fun to take part in certain stuff but i guess im always a silly girl who never makes the best of the opportunities she is presented with. when will i ever learn to carpe diem?

i only carpe diemed to watch eragon just now.. its like the shortest epic ever.. with kinda lame lines and i was forever 'whats wrong with the guy n the girl.. he doesnt even know anything abt her and he's going all the wya to save her and trust her and everything.. stupid idiot' n the eric bana of the movie had to die.. n the dragon was not fierce enough.. the liv tyler of the movie looked like a dragon ahahha.. well i was warned that the movie was like Lord of the Rings. a very short LOTR with not as much depth.. n i was wondering if eragorn is the same dude from peter pan..

hmms.. jealousy is interesting.. i love how its so intense n bordering towards hatred.. the passion tt somehow consumes u... is actually quite motivating..

victory cud have be SUHHHH-WEEEETT
stress wasmounting mannn.. n flamini scored.. then they didnt mark their men as hard as thye shud have but also cos tt annoying robben was running the flanks haggard.. last 15mins left esp after essien scored, u cud get a heartattack after every minute.. but gilberto was wonderful... being the perfect captain and defended so hard.. hardlygive him any credit.. so kudos to him

my nails hurt...

for some reason, even tho someone hit me in the stomach with a bat (lightly), got hit by balls at every part of my body, its my nails that hurt.. yes the fingernails. catching kennards mother fast balls was pretty fun but when i missed once n ricochet off to my right hand, it stung like shit.. but must act cool hahaa.. but now, the ends of my nails are the ones still feeling the after effects.. why my dear meddie frens? why??

in happier news, i found someones blog who uploaded some of the pgl songs!! ive been playing the songs over n over till the rhythm is ingrained in my brainn.. lalala
Pernahkah kalian dengar
Satu nama yang besar
Simpang lima melayu laksamana
Melaka yang paling handal
DIALAH TUAH!....

suatu hari nanti suram kan menjadi cerah
langit kan terbentang menyambut hari yang gemilang
suatu hari nanti majapahit akan kembali
suatu hari nani doa pasti dimakbulkan
impian jadi nyata bukan impi dan angan-angan...........

Langit malam tidak mampu
Terang bulan yang berseri-seri
Ku bersaksi pertemuan ini indah melampaui bidadari
Di sini resah jiwaku tenggelam
Terluah jatuh disambut bayu malam

today..
marks the 2nd meaning of freedom
mixed feelings but renewed hope
dont have to report to anyone else but myself
wont disappoint anyone else but me
but there are things ive set out to prove
which i have not fulfilled
but i swear.. i will.

thANK u to these 2 bedok-central-aunties for coming to the airport with me and accompanying me thru pples bday cakes which arent even their frens bday.. and dinner-ing while having to wait for me send off argentina-bound pple.. had tonnes of using-starbucks-stuff and non-halal-softtoy fun.. (& photowhoring with my camera phone when im not looking:)

anyhow, as those pple have a 24 hr flight, i had my own 'overseas' trip of my own.. the difference however was, by the time i slept that night, drove to JB and then to Geylang and then back home, they probably still havent reached Argentina hahha.. all in search for tt elusive PGL the musical soundtrack.. WHICH I STILL CANNOT FIND DAMMIT.. apparently new stock is only coming at the end of next week.. so ill contend with whatever songs i have now.. my sis n i were going crazy reciting all the cheesy lines.. n eating the world's biggest non-ice-kachang ice kachang.. just look at it! tts when we were half way thru with it.. the only thing true to its name was the ice.. it was at some hotel where we felt paiseh just coming in for a drink, so decided we shud order ice kachang.. little did we know it wud take super long cos there was a whole crater of brick ice in the bowl, topped with chendol, atapchee, pineapple, corn, grass jelly, icrecream with choc and strawberry syrup.. the madness of it all.. well thats how a RM11 ice kachang looks like folks.. needless to say.. we were dying trying to finish it esp since we had a RM60 sushi lunch only like 3hrs before tt.. and so we didnt..haha

OOOOOH MY GOODNESS.. while i was trying to get info on internships for Islamic banking under HSBC, i found this....

Internship Programme
We also offer a London-based internship programme to provide talented students with the opportunity to gain valuable experience and develop practical commercial skills in a fast-paced business environment before deciding which career path best suits them. During the structured ten weeks, you'll complete a comprehensive induction programme, be fully integrated into a core business area and make a valuable contribution to real transactions. There will also be a busy calendar of business briefings, workshops and social events.

I WANT THISSS!!! i want this soooooooooo baddddddddddddddddd
but they only offer to 3rd n 4th year students.. dammit!!
mebbe i can take it IMMEDIATELY after exchange in 2008 so i can stay in europe for 6-7mths! omgosh..
omgoshhhhh I SWEAR I WILL WORK MY ASS OFF TO GET THIS!
and the most annoying thing.. i DONT KNOW what is the requirements cos the link doesnt work!! ahhhH!!!!!

and then mebbe i can do this when i graduate!!
Graduate Programme
The HSBC Amanah Graduate Programme is a two-year analyst program designed to induct talented young graduates to HSBC Amanah through a nine-week training programme and three six-month rotations in different HSBC offices.
Since the central functions of HSBC Amanah are based in London, New York and Dubai, you may find yourself in any one of these cities depending on the business team you work with.
Unlike most business areas in HSBC Group, this programme gives you the opportunity to work closely with a variety of different businesses while remaining within the HSBC Amanah family. Alternatively, your rotations can be structured to split time
between a particular HSBC Amanah business and related businesses in HSBC Group.

woooots suddenly i have an aim in life...

It might be argued that a genetically enhanced athlete, like a drug-enhanced athlete, would have

an unfair advantage over his unenhanced competitors. But the fairness argument against

enhancement has a fatal flaw: it has always been the case that some athletes are better endowed

genetically than others, and yet we do not consider this to undermine the fairness of competitive

sports. From the standpoint of fairness, enhanced genetic differences would be no worse than

natural ones, assuming they were safe and made available to all. If genetic enhancement in sports

is morally objectionable, it must be for reasons other than fairness.
The
deeper danger is that they represent a kind of hyperagency—a Promethean aspiration to remake
nature, including human nature, to serve our purposes and satisfy our desires. The problem is not
the drift to mechanism but the drive to mastery. And what the drive to mastery misses and may
even destroy is an appreciation of the gifted character of human powers and achievements.
To acknowledge the giftedness of life is to recognize that our talents and powers are not wholly
our own doing, despite the effort we expend to develop and to exercise them. It is also to
recognize that not everything in the world is open to whatever use we may desire or devise.
Appreciating the gifted quality of life constrains the Promethean project and conduces to a certain
humility. It is in part a religious sensibility.
It is commonly said that genetic enhancements undermine our humanity by threatening our
capacity to act freely, to succeed by our own efforts, and to consider ourselves responsible—
worthy of praise or blame—for the things we do and for the way we are.

weeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

apparently there are gilmore girls fans who are complaining about the current season... but u know what! i STILL love it.. altho some parts are kinda predictable and cheesy... im not entirely hating the new writer but its his first season.. give him a break! and im totally feeling the lorelai-christopher combination.. i want them to MAKE IT WORKKK! cos luke is off being so loser-ish these days! totally hating the april thingy.. and lorelai n chris are perfect in their banter.. was laughing so much at how lorelai was criticizing chris for his 'man date' attire. how his jeans and shirt were too tight.. damnn.. n chris is cuter than luke dammit! n id rather chris' ignorance to the world than luke's insecurities.. im on TEAM CHRIS! and TEAM MCDREAMY and TEAM SUMMER and TEAM NATHAN while we're at it.. (fyi thats greys S3, oc S4 and one tree hill S2 respectively)

on the twc front
sarah: whoaa good luck!
jayne: yes.. the text is as as dry as an old biscuit and as repetitive as a casette player. and im going to misss youu!!! who else will buy me sunflowers and kinder bueno eggs and yelp at mcdreamy with?

absolutely JEALOUS of the pple on their way to argentina tomorrow.. *cries* im definitely gonna try to kill n impersonate one of them tom just before they leave hahah.. the attraction of half price zara and watching the last match of Boca Juniors is making me drool as if im sleeping on a water bed.. JEALOUSSS... u all know what to do arhhh.. expecting sth from each and every one of u.. n alvin promised me lionel messi! too bad they arent going to london or spain instead to bring me someone else haha

has forgotten how a laptop should sound...

silent..
i tell u how paiseh it is to have yr laptop revving like some kinda motorbike in the middle of a quiet room.. ive even not switched on my lappie for fear tt it wud incur the stares of many. ill switch my fan.. someday.. haha.. but im in the midst of getting all my serials.. so cannot.. haha

the best part about finals is... its FINAL u dont have to give another notice of what u did wrong or why the question is like thatt.. because u never have to think about that subject againn! unless of cos ure gonna need it for future mods like AFA and AMA.. then tt really sucks.. cos if uve screwed up yr basics.. so much ground to cover later! i really do appreciate the complexities of accounting but its crazeee.. maybe if u give me a whole day to do any of the supposed 3 hr accountancy papers, i might be able to do themright.. i really do enjoy the challenge of a tough module and the satisfaction tt it brings rather than mind numbing bullshit yr way thru mods but tt is if u dont have the stress of a GPA looming over you... pple only like what they are good at.. and thats because u dont give pple the chance to do badly at things they might like.

n one more rant about exams.. term 1 papers are much harder than term 2 papers.. because.. the profs have summer to come up with new and evil questions to kill u. and in term 2, they just kinda manipulate n repeat the evil qns but the students wud have already attempted the super evil one from previous termwhich makes term 2 papers much less evil.. well, tts my theory at least. whatever it is, ive practically screwed EVERYSINGLE final paper ive sat for in my uni life.. this is a mighty bad bad trend.. lets see if twc shall prove me right once again.. ONE MORE PAPER TO FREEDOM! and i mean freedom in more ways than one.

wants more stuff to get addicted to..

the addiction has already reached the limits of the telecast in the US so the hands get very itchy while waiting between weeks! n itchy for the pgl cd.. ive practically memorised every word of the songs tt i have of it now.. rarh... haha no one will figure its exam season here. n just realised QM is 70 mcqs worth.. kaoz.. can go crazy lah.. and need to create a cheatsheet for twc when i havent even done the readings.. dieeee! cant wait for sat! cant waittttt for dec hols!!

im on a pgl hangover.. i even found afdlin shauki's blog surfing ard for pgl stuff..
im DYINNGG to get my hands on the cd! damnn.. i cant wait till next sunday which hopefully ill go to jb to get my good dose of pgl cd, vcds and sushi haha. cant wait!

tomorrow doesnt exist.
ok it does.. but the ultimatum shant..
cos i know i know my things..
and i know that if i believe in myself and think things out systematically, i can do it
and even if not, i have plans
i have great fun plans
and i intend to live my life for once..

Unlike me - Kate Havnevik
There are no guarantees in life
Not for the present, Nor for the future.
All I know is That I'm here;
Don't know for how long.
I love the way
You live so intensely
Enjoy every minute of life
With space to swing
Your arms around
Laughing loudly
Unlike me Unlike me
Do you think I'm strange?
Unlike you
Unlike you I am not pretending

weeeeee... on a puteri gunung ledang high!

i guess you can count today as my break from studying cos PGL seemed to take the whole day! Watched the Matinee show today and i loved it overall! :) the plot was a bit thin.. especially for chapter 2 but i guess they were trying to fit it all in..

i loved loved looooooved the transition changes and set.. ok tts not the main thing pple will normally love but i do.. it was absolutely seamless. kudos to the set designer. esp the part when the curtains fell to become the sea.. like the pic of the boat above.. n i thought the opening was pretty cool, when they introduced the many layers to the set.

i love watching the expressions of the people apart from who is talking. anddd i do love the music.. altho the main theme is stuck in my head.. ANDDD even though it was a matinee and an extra one (which thank god wasnt played by the understudies) we got to see celebrities! like afdlin shaukI!! who is soo cute and round! sharon ismail, rilla melati, glenda chong ANDD khairudin sahrom! who is super tall and distinct.. u cud pick him out of a crowd easily! i guess my first class tickets was worth it! esp since the view was really pretty good.. guess it was fate tt we didnt watch the night timings cos then we wud have missed out on seeing them hahaha.. which is half the fun! ok not half.. quarter.. altho we didnt get to see hans issaac who DID say he wud catch it here AND who IS in sg right now :) weee... im how in touch with melayu now haha. ya right.. altho when i cudnt hear what they were saying, had to refer to the subtitles haha.. which was sometimes actually not a true representation of what they said, but its normal i guess that translations cant capture the real essence.. oh i was laughing when they counted in javanese cos being half javanese and all, tts about as much javanese words i know! lol.. siji loroh telur papat! n goblok! haha

this will totally instill further interest in future shows.. like.. MY FAIR LADY!! in jan! loves it.. BUT one thing i figured is.. musicals.. are not serious.. because the kings of majapahit n melaka decided to do a little dance. at least the majapahit one did a warrior dance.. the melakan raja did a girly butt twitchy one!! which made me laugh through the ENTIRE time.. he even swung his long hair around.. wth hahaha.. anyhow.. the ending. not so good.. but ill give credit to them for producing sth pretty awesome.. where malays in the truckloads really came out to fill up FOUR full shows.. fabulous!
no complaining about not studying here! :D

ooh ooh forgot to add autograph session photos! :)

adipati-tuah-gustiputri

tuah has grey eyes... haha

An amusing read:
Fabregas - Walcott is one of the world's best youngsters
“He is the best player of that age playing in the Premiership,” said Fabregas, “Definitely. When he came to Arsenal you could see he has the quality. If I had to choose two players it would be him and Lionel Messi, because I saw what he could do at Barcelona. For me they are the two best players I have seen at 16 to17.
Of course it is only three years since a 16-year-old Fabregas first stole Highbury hearts with his precocious talent. Now a veteran of 120 games, the Spaniard is in prime position to judge the new kid on the block.
http://www.arsenal.com/article.asp?thisNav=News&article=430544&lid=NewsHeadline&Title=Fabregas+-+Walcott+is+one+of+the+world%27s+best+youngsters



its true... watching fabregas for just these couple of yrs make it feel like ive been watching him forever.. and i keep having to remind myself he's 10mths younger than me! impossible!

It turned out to be a good night after all












after trailing by one goal, with a wonder strike by emmanuel eboue and two fabulous assists by walcott, we redeemed ourselves.. as weiming puts it, everything happens after the 80th min. including the loss of man u to celtic :D anyhow, i think the white sweater fabregas is wearing is v pretty! will anyone buy it for me? :D and just a mini tribute to ljungberg who recently won swedish player of the year.. bravo to my gunners!

n think my corp is super dead considering i havent touched it today since i slept at 6am. help!

Itunes Oracle!

Q) How does the world see you?
A) Could not ask for more – Edwin Mccain

Q) Will I have a happy life?
A) Gadis Melayu – Mawi

Q) What do my friends really think of me?
A) Can I have it like that - Pharell

Q) Do people secretly lust after me?
A) hey jealousy – Gin Blossom

Q) How can I make myself happy?
A) Nobody knows it but me – Tony Rich Project (but i dunno also!!)

Q) What should I do with my life?
A) Mi reflejo - Xtina (been doing tt all my life)

Q) Will I ever have children?
A) Girls – Destiny Child (but I really want boys!)

Q) What is some good advice for me?
A) Semi Charmed life – Third Eye Blind

Q) How will I be remembered?
A) Para tu amor - Juanes

Q) What is my signature song?
A) Unlike me – Kate Havenvik

Q) What do I think my current theme song is?
A) Crazy Love – Jackson Browne

Q) What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
A) I’ll be – Edwin Mccain

Q) What song will play at my funeral?
A) Such Great Heights – The Postal Service

Q) What type of men/women do I like?
A) Dang Shineun… - Goong OST.. (erps Korean?)

Q) What is my day going to be like?
A) Crush – Jennifer Paige


I was gonna use the last question to determine if i should go out today.. and i was mortified to see the result.. cos i misread it as crash.. HMMM.. wouldnt want the 3rd last qn to happen too soon now..

an interesting package hung on the gate as i came home from supper..

not entirely rain-proof but it survived.

thank you jaynita and grasita :)

too many words to say..

but know tt ill be there for you too.

its the most awesomest thing ever!

ok i swear im not a pervert but when i was watching greys.. his sculpted body is really like those of the statues of the Greek Gods! u wud never think such a person exists.. but yes! people with super hot bods and faces so chiselled its as if u chiselled them yourselves with chisels (ok fine not yourselves but by professionals) exist.. wow...







& may i add.. alex karev is looking mighty alot like freddie ljungberg esp when bald which he is in season 3.. and it seems both are models for CK.. guess we know what kinda looks CK is channelling..

ok everyone who has gone to vivocity and come out of it telling me stories did not tell me this..

ITS BLOODY BASED ON GAUDI'S WORK!

since i cant find pics of vivocity.. lemme just say, it looks like parc guell (pic 1) and la padrera (pic 2)





and HMM the official site says NOTHING abt this.. mebbe they are awaiting for the official opening in dec. There's even a section dedicated to spain complete with gaudi souvenirs and FC Barcelona shop lol. ok fine after all tt criticism of how sg's oh so happening new concept is actually based on some other country which speaks volume of our creativity and bitching how wannabe europeans we are, i conceded when i saw Zara & Pull and Bear.. Pull and Bear is under the same holding company as Zara.. was surfing through all their brands sometime like last year n massimo dutti is one of them too.. can i just say i lurveee their shops? I finally got my wrap top tt ive seen a billion of everywhere else but cudnt find a decent one, since im super picky. ay.. it seems the whole world is enjoying spain and the spanish language when i was the one obsessed months ago.. dying to get to europe but prob wont be able to until this fad dies down.. i SWEAR im at the forefront of trends.. haha Sya can vouch for me tt ive been in love with longish wrap tops and spain since forever.. ok well since jc.. n looks whats in now! hmm wonder what ill predict soon!

im hopelessly addicted to..........
GREYS ANATOMY!!!!

shitlah! 2 quizzes to study for this week and what am i doing? i just watched 3 or 4 episodes in a roww... and the sucky part abt the episodes towards the end is.. IT HOOKS YOU! well at least i have a further 5 episodes!!! happiness.. but after tt, no moreee. HOW!??!?!! no more mcdreamyy! no more meredith!!!! ahhh!!!! why did i get hooked in the first place!??!?!

cant help but remember this song when i was typing the title...

Hopelessly devoted To You - Grease
Guess mine is not the first Heart broken
My eyes are not the first To cry
I'm not the first to know
There's just no gettin' over you
You know i'm just a fool Who's willing
To sit around And wait for you
But, baby, can't you see?
There's nothing else for me to do
I'm hopelessely devoted To you

But now There's nowhere to hide
Since you pushed my love aside
I'm out of my head
Hopelessly devoted To you
Hopelessyly devoted To you
Hopelessly devoted To you

My head is saying, Fool forget him
My heart is saying
Don't let go Hold on to the end,
And that's what i intednd to do
I'm hopelessly devoted to you

But now There's nowhere to hide
Since you pushed my love aside
I'm out of my head Hopelessly devoted To you
Hopelessly devoted To you
Hopelessly devoted To you

just been invaded by a billion pretty adorable kids..
ok fine.. more like 6? running ard the whole house curious through every door.. before i knew it, while i was in the kitchen fixing drinks, my 1m tall bear was hijacked by a kid shorter than the bear.. at least it remindedme that the bear is more than just for ornamental purposes and feels real good to hug.. which is pretty much what i need these days. just a good hug.. if i cant have some hot dashing guy holding me in his arms.. lol.. :)

with every weekend.. there is a pickmeup called arsenal..
and who are my favouritest central defenders?? kolo toure and william gallas!
they are both are so incredibly hilarious (in a goodway) and hardworking.. so much so they ended up on the score sheet today! not to mention flamini was the first scorer.. hahhaha and the interview with the both of them at the end of the match was how cute! toure scored first so gallas said he will score too and toure said he wanted to see him do it.. gallas is the leading goalscoring central defender! hahaha oh how they've bonded.. n the great family feeling u get from the team.. is the perfect solution to a case of mondayblues..

im ready to face the day!
rarr!

driving down the highway blasting the cd feels so good.
i wished i had an endless ocean drive with all the best songs to belt out along to..
so i can forget everything and everyone.......

i dont want to be unhappy n hurt over the stupidest things anymore..
but i really thought things would look up this time.
n i hoped n prayed this time all would go right
but no. lightning can strike twice.

weeeeeeeee boss sucks..
look at my 6.5 mods week haha

GUESS WHAT IM DOING AT 230PM 25TH NOV!?

I GOT TICKETS!!!!!!!!

happiness.. nothings gonna get me down todayyyy cos me have my PGL tix. my over n done with corp n MORE greys anatomy to watch after i leave skl at 10 tomorrow.. oh what bliss! persistence and determination are 2 things to learn today..

lemme just say that the sistics computer system SUCKS! i had to wait in line for 1 hour, noticeably the number of frustration-releasing smses were sent out exponentialyl as time went by. and i hate when they make orders of 2 diff shows at the same time.. bloody slow comp.. AND screw the stupid idiot who helped her fren jump queue.. i was about to yell at her face.. but ili has manners after all. held it in.. was sure of getting tickets after standing in line for damn long. AND THEN... drumrolls.. all tickets at 65 and 45 dollars are sold out.. wtf leh really wtf.. the news abt a new timesloT JUST came out tt day in the newspaper. so left with 95 dollar tickets.. risking daggers from the really long queue behind me, i had to call my sis and cousin to confirm buys. but eventually.. an hour worth of mindless, munching on my chocolate banana muffin standing ard resulted in tickets! ok i realise how drama im making out this whole thing but hell. theres something to look foward to before i meet with my fate called corp reporting.
speaking of which, was the class tt came after all that standing ard..

no more running away.

i really don't want to be sad

tapi sudah jadi seperti jatuh ditimpa tangga.
ingin membuktikan diri. tapi mungkin terlambat.

all i want is to get past this miserable season.
ive lost control over things.
this is my fate.

The happier times in life












hokay.. packed packed tiring weekend. sat was spent a day entertaining me friends from all over.. Appreciate you guys coming down and dropping all work u had to come and eat up our food :) These are the times to relax and have funn! Look how we've grown from eh what bus goes to your house to eh what expressway can i take? (and eh how do i parallel park right hon :P) Ain is how garang with her super hot bike! from the rgs peeps to the rj classmates and the smoo-ers.. we shud always have more of these altho.. its damn frekaing tiring to cleanuP!

and then...

THE BAD DAYS..
when ure stuck in school from 11am to 11 freaking pm.. on a SUNDAY!!!! im really an anti sunday worker.. sundays are rest i am not leaving the house days.. and i can't stand projects that stay at a standstill for far too long.. alot of stuff can be done quickly and all u need is the focus.. im really not a fan of project meetings.. and more so of mugging.. wow smu culture sure is great.. i really dont care about how much other pple are mugging anymore. let me live my own happy life where smart studying shall prevail.

concussed

i really cant survive sleeping at 430am and then having skl for half of the next day. its all TWC's fault. after researching for how many days, i cudnt find anything good to write for indiv assignment. so i only started crapping sth out from 1am.. then i watched arsenal v moscow which was how exciting but damn annoying.. 23 freaking shots at goal.. i was screaming at the tv every other second.. which obviously slowed down my assignment writing process.. woke at 9am to finish it haha.. i hope i dont do too badly.. shucks.
then.. I reached home at 8pm and.. SLEPT ALL THE WAY till this morning.
i didnt even eat dinner :S woke up later thinking wow what a good nap i had.. until i saw it was 3am

Conclusion:
Ili needs sleep
lots of it.

sadness

puteri gunung ledang is SOLDOUT!! serves me right for taking a mth to actually go down to buy. sigh.. so nothing to lighten up the mood when im abt to cry of studying..

sooo.. to make me happier, i went down to zara (haha as if i need a reason to go to zara) and bought me sth.. almost got a dress.. but thot id be better off buying those types from flea markets.. :) urh i just need to start going to them tho hahhaa..

I don't know why i suddenly remembered these lyrics all of a sudden

I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble

even though i don't show it doesn't mean i don't long for it
we all hide what we really think and feel
we all try to detach ourselves from the hurt that we feel
well, i do at least.

i know why im dull
it takes too much effort to be happy and high all the time
its stupid to remain an angry little girl
its pointless to be depressed over long periods
theres nothing left to think and feel anymore

Selamat Hari Raya!

I think this is one of the few times i can say that without a shred of cynicism and sianness. The day started out slow but parts of it were pretty meaningful to me. Had some meaningful talks which were inspiring and useful to me. My most happening grandaunt who is prob like 70+ is taking classes 3 or 4 times a week.. and teaches Quran.. learns arab... theres so much more to life than what ive led myself to believe, than what ive let myself live with, and hold too importantly to.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
why must hte most hectic time of the term fall during hari raya!?!?
no time to blog.. must go spring clean.. must mug.. must do project!
so heres life in pictures..













btw pic no. 2 is for frigging TWC proj.. id never thot i use sin rule in real life haha

ILI IS TIRED AND ALVIN IS A SLAVEDRIVER!

ok.. its for the best interests of the project and im lucky enough if he doesnt bitch tt im doing such a pathetic job on the most important part of the project. corp reporting n marketing deadlines are beckoning.. proj grps seeing that im not doing anything.. but i really have no freaking time.. :( screw school.

when i didnt want to see the truth

when all i wanted was to run away

when i felt the school suddenly too busy and too choked up

i found a little pick-me-up

in a book called Life by Edward Monkton.

& another favorite

woots

i have officially conquered 5 chapters of marketing! fabulous! i thought it was going to take the wholee day and eat up into my champs league match at 12 but woohoo i even have 30mins to spare before the most dreadful class of all.. CORP REPORTING!wah super packed week shucks

Today
330-645: Corp Reporting
700-730: Iftar
730-930: TWC Meeting
random mug-kerting
1200-230: Champs League Match

Wed
830-930: Marketing quiz
330-530: Marketing meeting
230-500am: Chelsea v Barcelona

n tt doesnt count qm test on friday morning and the wth business casual sports awards on friday night AFTER softball training.

a good dose of greys anatomy

sigh.
its not a good sign when the first day after term break u get a headache n just want to run away from it all.
gd thing my dramas provide the best way to clear the head.
why cant it be my happiness?
sigh.

some people get all the luck.

n ordinary humans like me. get nothing. are nothing.

wah so penat
an eventful day. with lots of acckk what u mean pple dunno theres marketing meeting?, garrrhhh i hate twc moments.. weee i miss training moments and omg making kuih raya in the middle of the night takes foreverrrrr moments.. :)

but as the last batch of biscuits bake in the oven, yes at 130am im grateful for what i have. :) all i wish for is the sweet moments to last longer..

el-bulli: food to diee for

first heard about the restaurant in one of anthony bourdain's food reviews on Discovery Travel & Living. This place in Barcelona is really one of a kind. They close for half a year to come up with new recipes. Each meal has about 30 courses with some courses only being a mouthful but still a sinful mouthful. They are made with special techniques and the presentation is just fabulous. Of course it must mean it comes with a price. gosh.. i MUST find a sugar daddy when im in barcelona :D ok tt sounded wrong..

sigh.

maybe its just the way ive been brought up but i hate being anywhere other than home when i break fast. i hate how things have changed. how nek is no longer with us and how we made her happy when we bought her favourite food. i hate how other responsibilities take precedence over Ramadhan and Syawal. i hate change. don't tell me to grow up and accept it. I wont. give me back my happiness.

just found my favourite song from back in kindergarten. just goes to show ive been a rocker fan forever..

Untuk Mu Ibu -Exist
Oh! Ibu
Kau disiram bayu pagi
Kehilangan terasa kini
Dan kesepian
Dan aku
Bagai purnama gerhana
Di ibarat lautan kering
Tiada tempat ku layarkan
Hasratku ini
Masih belum sempat
Kubuktikannya kepadamu
Ibu tersayang
Kucurahkan rasa hati
Ku tatapi potret mu berulang kali
Kurenungkan kalimah yang diberi

Tuhan Yang Esa
Ampuni dosa ibu
Tempatkan mereka
Di antara kekasih kekasihMu

Oh! Ibu
Kau kasih sejati
Kutaburkan doa
Untukmu ibu

Ampunilah dosaku
Sejak ku dilahirkan
Hingga akhir hayatmu
Saat ini
Kuteruskan hidup
Tanpa bersamamu ibu

wtf arsenal stop buying midfielders!!!

i swearr.. wenger ONLY buys midfielders.. as if hleb, fabregas, rosicky, baptista, gilberto isnt enough.. he now just bought another brazillian youth, a dutch youth, wassit a spanish youth too? and are reportedly interested in ribery. n apparently the brazillian is another gilberto, the dutch is another persie and the spanish is another fabregas.. whats he trying to do!!???! its like clichy being the cole clone.. i can understand if mebbe there is an injury or someone is underperforming, the same tactic can be used cos uve technically got twice the manpower but a single minded tactic seems too narrow doesnt it? and i cant imagine managing how you're going to introduce so many youths into the team. even walcott isnt a main team fixture yet.

if only i had more of an interest in my studies as i do in sports. fell asleep reading marketing.. so i totally missed out on americas next top model.. woke up promptly as the show ended.. wanted to kick myself.. so substituted it with 2 episodes of greys anatomy.. meredith is how cool.. and the soundtrack too.

broke.. no more shopping for the rest of the year.. sobs..
stupid battery. stupid textbook.

de ja vu!

how do u say tt in espanol? Cos this is the 2nd time miss amalsarah n i wore our espana shirts on the same day w/o planning.. Viva la espana chicas! :)

and it just so happens there is a Discover Europe fair going on in school today.. ah so paiseh go to the Spain booth lol. Alvin ended up chatting with the person at the booth cos my spanish is muy mal in comparison to his haha.

we did it!

SMU SOFTBALL'S FIRST EXCO!

after a year of hard sweat and lots of shit admin, we pulled it off.. we officially have softball in smu! Here's to many years of great fun, tight friendships and sweet success!!

a series of unfortunately silly incidents

started out with my battery.. my sadsad battery
then today got back my marketing quiz.. 12.5 over 15.. ooh not bad.. then glances at answers on the screen.. how come he has 20 answers? oh F*** i left out the last 5 qns!??!?! i remembered thinking tt i had to answer the qns on the paper itself. so smarrrtttt.. gosh i hope its a plus 5 marks instead of a minus 1.25

garh! all my subjects overlap this sem! brainstormed FOREVER last night and this morning for marketing and twc lessons.. n im seeing econs everywhere! and met both profs today to consult their opinion regarding our product and i totally mixed up what they both said! one is supposed to be to market a new product and the other is to make use of current technology onto new applications. so begins the frightening onslaught of project meetings and deadlines

just 1 more lesson left this week before midterm break starts.. semi scared for this sem to end because I don't ever want to have to deviate from Plan A. Plan A.v2 is my saving grace but it depends on the flexibility of this everyday becoming more beaurocratic system. Plan B has more flexibility and less stress i suppose but no never... cannott! i shall not let it lead me to Plan B.

Well, lets take a break and read an ode to summer & the bottom is what i call fake service in sg

OFIM!

heh stole that off emily's blog... doesnt take much to figure what tt is.. esp if i tell u the opp is tgif
OFIM indeedy. took 1 hr to get out of bed and decide whether to go to skl or not
mac u owe me one battery -glares-

shites.. i think im on break mentality a week too early.
been slacking nonstop even till mums bugging me.. but i hate that theres nothing truly substantial to study.. why does it seem everyone else has their head stuck in books? maybe you have to find your own material to study? sigh nooo.. i want to have fun! thank goodness no midterms! :)

need to be filling life with more useful things other than watching dramas and studying..

sports fiesta was pretty fun tho.. and the 2 dinners tt night :) with grumpy ol' jayne.. but we've concluded tt grumpy pple are cool yea? lol

the smartest girl alive

its all macs fault! HE was the one who toldme that u cud use ANY adpator to charge the laptop battery.. well i smartly used a multipurpose adaptor, plugged it in, reversed the polarity since i was wondering why it wasnt working.. then POOF laptop died.. next thing i know, my battery has forgotten how to charge itself and forgotten how to display how much life it has left.. but THANK GOD for warranties.. i can get a brand new battery.. i hope.. too lazy to go to CIT to exchange tho

anyhow.. its 11am! and i finally finished reformatting QM!!! fabulous! but terribly hungry.. :( just 8 more hours to tahan before breaking fast. it doesnt help that theres dodgeball n netball later. tahan ili tahan! itll all be worth it for the 2 free dinners tonight!!! :D

aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

im having a love hate relationship with QM...
8pm last night: YAY!!!! I SOLVED IT!!!!!
920pm: Khairul sms: I SOLVED ITT!!!
930pm: OH SHIT DIFFERENT ANSWER!
spent the rest of the night tweaking both models.
150pm today: i dont know what else to tweak for khairuls model!!
152pm: oh no... the model that i spent one whole day yest working on IS WRONG!!!!!!!!
conclusion: khairuls model must be right but HAVE TO REFORMAT!!!!!!!

in case u wonder where the love comes from, its from thinking i have the right answer and the satisfaction it brings.

dumdumdummmmm

Who da man!?

Now, the composers better do him justice not like the Taufik CD..

Cynic alert!

RAWR!

garh.. crabby crabby ili on a crabby crabby saturday.. ok fine the day wasnt sooo bad. watched track ivp relays.. what can i say, sports is in my blood... I'm willing to watch any match esp if I know people in it. the races were how exciting! Can you imagine watching sengsong zoom from 6th to 2nd as the last leg of the 4x100m relay!??! someone commented he shud be booked for speeding.. lol. and they totally dominated the the 4by400m relays too! NUS nearly caught up in like the last 20m.. scareee.. they caught up from a 40m lead to like neck to neck! but its just incredible to watch them start off so fast and accelerate even faster in the last 200m.. nuts! met kitfei too! she's still as bubbly as ever.. :)

ok so the title and entry doesnt match.. but i just cant shake off the cynic in me. the link that jayne showed me: http://www.despair.com/viewall.html probably describes me best. my favourites have to be
Failure: When your best just isn't good enough. &
Dare to Slack: When birds fly in the right formation, they need only exert half the effort. Even in nature, teamwork results in collective laziness.

hmm, ive got to wonder.. did school just kill my soul?

Tell me its going to be alright
Tell me I'm going to be fine
Tell me I can do it
because
I'm scared
I'm losing faith
I'm losing it.


I'm right back where I started (when it comes to wanting you) I can't have what I wanted but I did, I can I was, I am only human, living, dying just like any fool who ever breathed if love is blind if love's a drug it always is it always was and love was surely made for fools like me I know where I'm going I'm tripping I'm sliding around that's ok at least I'm excited maybe it's the sanest thing or just the sweetest kind of dream but love was surely made for fools

today was totally exciting.. damn psyched up and went on crazy high rooting for the team.. well done Steeeveee, miss clumsy sarah, chinaman xiayue, wei-weiming & captain dza. Next year, ALL the competitors will be left in your dust :)

i need to mug for corp :(

i suck.

forever young

i always wanted to grow up too quickly. but now, hell no.
time is going by too fast. its week 5! and ive hardly gotten started.. ive hardly learnt anything, or does tt seem the case in uni because it goes by too fast?? but whats worst is when we grow up, the people older than us grow older too. roll your eyes now and yell DUH.. but don't you always want to see your parents as young people? Older than us... but not old. I hate seeing my parents shagged to the max.. it makes them look older than they should... and im guilty of being so spoilt or not chipping in as much as i should. shucks.

on another note, I've been trying to make an effort to stop using lahs all over the place. Heres to better eeengrish, staying young, getting through the term unscathed and a little something more.

cudnt be truer..

jargon will be the death of me

"Provided that the increase in operating liabs does not affect NOPAT, RNOA is also increased.. Since OLLEV is a positive number, increasing OLLEV increases RNOA.... As defined, RNOA equals NOPAT margin (in percent) multiplied by NOA turnover.. Company X achieves 10% RNOA with a relatively high NOPAT margin and a low NOA turnover"

WTF!?

ok fine.. most of the jargon is repeated.. but when u write jargon into equations written in WORDS/SENTENCES, u make ili go crazy..

a day of 40mins

so my parents are finally in jakarta visiting my cousin...
just came home from a tiring sortof day

went to skl at 11am! to do a 40mins survey! fine.. 30mins for the fast readers.. i wanted to be an honest surveyeee.. until i got to the last few ones n i just wanted to get it over.. and then wanted to die from all that waiting till FOUR!! for a bloody qm quiz which i was too brain dead to take.. was supposedly 1 hr. but after 40mins i threw in the towel and took a nice stroll for coffee and pretzels. then sent off parents at the airport where we had dinner just before they left for abt 40mins too. ay..

i want to watch hurdles tomorrrowwwwwwww.. but why is it not my luck that i have a blooody project meeting in skl!?!?!?!?!?!? n then other not very exciting things to do.. i need a more happening weekend!

on the subject of happening..
its a LIVERPOOL V CHELSEA & MANU V ARSENAL
sunday showdown so if u wanna go watch, gimme a shoutout!

hide & seek

mummy's stocking up food as if she'll be away for 4 weeks instead of 4 days. first time parents leaving us home alone to go overseas without a chaperone. the last time was p5 but then i had nenek and the aunt n uncle who wud basically be at home almost 24/7 anyway. anyhow, told her 75% of the food will still be here when she gets back hehe.. unless we wreak havoc n throw a party.. haha ya right since when was ili so happening? it might just end up being a mugger toot party right dee?

week 4 and barely making it through the week.
mood swinging like crazy and i just have to hide or i might end up blowing in someones face.
i need ablooody life.


I'm a little lamb who's lost in the wood
I know I could, always be good
To one who'll watch over me

Happy Birthday Sarah!

A couple of us went to help at track IVP, being sarah's slaves and all. but it was also her birthday! we waited for hours and only then did the bearer of balloons asilahma come with such pweety bawwoonns complimenting her outfit ahha..

& we gave them to the birthday girl who wasnt really THAT surprised because stupid zhixiang accidentally let it slip with 'so the balloons are in her car?' steve valiantly tried to salvage the situation with 'didnt you know we scraped the balloon idea?' but that didnt stop us from giving him a murderous glare. Well the balloons matched sarah's outfit too haha.. hope they are still happily bouncing ard the room now.
And so concluded an eventful day. Lotsa love, the failed birthday-present surprisers. :)

today was how fun!

i thot the replies for the clinic was pathetic but we ended up having tonnes of fun!
and we even had a mini RJ softballer reunion thing going.. we had abt 5 of the guys, puisan who gamely came down, quijun n me.. then so happen coach appeared! cos he was training the national guys team later.. and so mccurdy was there too.. we really shud have taken a shot of it.. so cute and kinda elitist mwahha.. it helped tt everyone was so sporting and talked & teased each other so much.. made the whole atmosphere really fun :)

hope we have even more trainings like this to come and mebbe the guys will even want to set up a competitive team! how awesome is that! so cool so cool... who wud have thought man! oh ya and coach says that the oldies at ORA wanna sponsor a female softball team to play in leagues and trainings will be at RJ! perfecto lah.. so funky! wished puisan cud be here to join us! i miss throwing ard/pitching and gossipping ard with her! n she's how patient with meee.. even as i throw damn crappy balls hahaa.. tankew babe! luv yaa

eurgh a minor bad part of the day was when a baby lizard FELLL on my fingerrr.. how disgusting is that lah.. i felt damn grossed outttt.. really wanted to bath and burn my finger to get rid of the gross feeling.. gah.. cold blooded animals feel damn rubbery and disgusting lah!

really got nothing else better to do

my sis called me up on her way home saying she found a chio cat.. n asked me to come down n take a look.. so i drove like hmm 300m to pick her up/feed & play with the cat.

the things i do for a ball of fur & the lack of excitement here.
one day ill be a cat ladylah

perpetually hungryy

i really thought i ate alot.. but im always hungry garh
shopping was an utter failure. saw alot of possible cases, borderline between buying or not but ended up not buying any cos im SUPER fussy. i think its my sisters fault.. influences me to only buy stuff tt are completely perfect n perfect in price too. how rare is tt.. and these REALLY simple pair of URS slippers were 30 bucks.. so annoying.. i can be a cheapo but im sure there must be a nicer cheaper pair elsewhere! at times like these i wished i had all the money in the world to buy everything i want and only wear the same clothes once.. haha i guess tts the fascination with the hiltons n lohans of the world.

anyhow.. ive been happified :) i shall seek more happifying! I promise.
-sigh-

talked to jayne n qin abt the whole intermarriage thing.. n concluded that my decent guy doesnt exist... but its just odd to be thought as the religious one when i know, im nowhere near what i ought to be.

feels good just to lie back and relax.

freak lah reading frens blogs always makes me kinda depressed. other people are living it up, travelling n enjoying life like what its meant to be and i have to worry abt stupid FRS. boo. mebbe its not so bad if i get kicked out if it gives me a peace of mind. but it doesnt give me a LT peace of mind tho. shites. once when i gave up the chance to take that trip to US back in rgs, i thot there wud be more chances. i was wrong.. n i told myself never to take such chances for granted. why didnt i take that chance with argentina? i hate being in such a vulnerable position. what if i never go for exchange? what if i never get a chance to travel and actually have fun in uni!? seriously, to all the smuggers killing the system, shit u. how did my ideal picture of a skl become a damn competitive place tt seems to only value grades! or wassit all just marketing. gah.. i hate feeling bad for getting mediocre grades. i want some fun :(

shock of water.

more of mud rather.. so frigging tired... but hahahah WATERSHOCK is ovaaaaaa! gone dead buried never to be done ever again! i feel goood enough to study.. haha ya right. the netting is crazy lahhh.. have to keep fixing n adjusting n going crazy.. balls being shot out of the machine at like 88km/hr? so u can imagine all the cracksn holes... but it was great to have alot of pple being mighty interested in taking a whack at the machine and failing rather miserably lol.
Physics at work. See our dimensions translated into reality





a funny incident that happened tho was the softballers went to dragonboat.. dickson n i were staying behind to man the booth when we heard on the comms that a boat had capsized and they were calling for the rescue boat.. we thot wah what really smart team was that who capsized. n then.. a very wet bunch of sotballers started walking back to our booth.. hahaha.. n i thot it was one of the guys, zhenghan's fault cos before the race he wanted very badly to soak in the water cos it was such a hot day. apparently they were rocking the boat so badly, they happened to capsize right after they crossed the finishing line.. hilarious lah! still qualified for the finals summore..lol but bravo!

but man the thought of watershock being over and i can actually have a good nights rest without waking to a jolt abt stupid admin matters feeels ever sooo good. altho the talk i had with some of them last night abt skl and scary muggers and scarily smart n rich pple seriously frightened me. gah.. which is the lesser evil!?