updated the links cos some of them are hella long. havent been here in ages.
either ways, if you're still here, i've moved! SO, GO, THERE!
http://le_amourr.livejournal.com
move to livejournal while you're at it. HAHA
Free me.
I'm a Heroine. Loves superheroes and FFTL hence the name.
Lingyu/ LY
Sagittarius
21st Dec'1989- The Winter Solstice
Deviant
Chocolate Fairy-lights.
Under Construction.
*HUGS* TOTAL!
give flavouroftheday more *HUGS*
Get hugs of your own
updated the links cos some of them are hella long. havent been here in ages.
i think its sweet that couples this age feel that their love is eternal and will conquer all.
love is eternal and they'll prob end up married.
its a really sweet notion, but im a goddamn romantic turned skeptic... sigh, its so sad.
and its not just me that thinks that way. some who fall in LOVE, with LOVE-
i think thats sad too.
its like what kb told me, that a certain he falls for every girl who expresses the least bit of interest. infatuation.
that, is so sad love. now i feel a whole lot better about myself.
&
my house guests are so darn annoying.
the little boy's next to me in his really, strong, heavy chinese mainland accent and im like -.-
go away. i don't mind you staying here, but don't come and annoy me can.
sometimes i just feel like screaming GET THE HELL OUTTA MY ROOM/HOUSE/LIFE.
but i can't.
so the only outlet for me to vent is my mom. which makes me feel rather guilty but its just something about her these days that annoy me.
its as though every pore of her's oozing "hateme". ugh ugh ugh.
mood- bitchy.
Labels: house guests, in love with love., infatuations
anyone in a mood to get depressed? LOL.
click.
Labels: deviant., family, motives, unscrupulous means
| The Keys to Your Heart |
 You are attracted to good manners and elegance. In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you. You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring. You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic. Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred. In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. |
Labels: blogthings.
i just checked back on some of my older entries.
you always made me risk getting caught sneaking out.
another reason for me to hate you.
Save me from this prison
Lord, help me get away'
Cause only you can save me now
From this misery
Well I've been lost in my own place
And I'm getting' weary
How far is heaven?
And I know that I need to change
My ways of living
How far is heaven?
Lord, can you tell me?
I've been locked up way too long
In this crazy world
How far is heaven?
I just keep on prayin',
LordI just keep on livin'
How far is heaven?(Oh, Lord, can you tell me?)
How far is heaven?(I just gotta know how far it is)
How far is heaven?(Oh, Lord, can you tell me?)
heaven= you.
It's easier to fall and harder to stand
It's easier to cry and harder to laugh,
And I don’t know how, I don’t know why
But you’re the light on my shoulder
When I'm tired It's easier to run and harder to be still
It's easier to think and harder to feel,
And I don’t know how, I don’t know why
But you’re the light on my shoulder
When I'm tired It's easier to hide and harder to trust
It's easier to hate and harder to love
And I don’t know how, I don’t know anything
But you’re the temper in my voice
When I sing
you were the light on my shoulder..
5 reasons why bloggers should switch to livejournal
so yes, i'll still reply tags and i dont think i'll abanddooonn this blog, but i'll be at http://le_amourr.livejournal.com so comment and ADD. toodles!
mm past two days:
i decided to spare everyone the emo momo entries. hahaha, its not that im cheered up. ive found another outlet. find me at my LJ if you really want to get lowflowemoo.
Hope, expectation, Bright promises.
The Star is one of the great cards of faith, dreams realised
The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming, with water to quench your thirst, with a guiding light to the future. They might say you're a dreamer, but you're not the only one.
The Star is one of those cards everyone loves. In every deck, it is usually the most beautiful. It suggests the peace and harmony of its meaning. There is nothing negative about this card, but I think there is a trick to it. Whatever hope, healing, future it offers, the reader must remember that it might not be immediate. This is a soft card, and like Aquarius, its vision is for tomorrow, not today. That's not to say that it offers no concrete benefits; it is a card the predicts unexpected help, but that help is only the first step. The star only reveals the future. It is up to the Querent to find his way to that future.
http://www.aeclectic.net/basics/star.shtml
What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.
the day passed quite fast. like, went to school for proj onlyy. skipped the lects [hoho, i should stop] then met up with the dear bitch gary and had BREAKFAST. >.<>
decided to watch some lame show in the lib after he told me about this movie illusions, which sounds damn nice but im not gonna watch anymore cos he told me like, the whole plot. oh, then we couldn't find "love me if you dare". anyone who took it, please return cos we wanna watch it. the movie we chose, "le divorce" was supposed to be sexy and funny. okay, the accents were sexy, and i guess slightly in your face and alll.... but um, overall? 2.5 popcorns outta 5. boo.
yes, next time i'll let gary do the choosing.
you cant lose what you've never had. true, but i rather not lose this at all...
dont want to risk it. at all.
boohoo i won't get emo over this.. hhahaha, yes, i know my posts are getting increasingly depressing. SO SAD AH. if you're like down, don't read my blogg. you'll feel worse. im gonna take a happy pill tonight and just sleep away the rest of um, everything. :D
all in all, i'm really appreciative of all everyone's done for me. just a small "cheer up" makes me smile too. i won't let this get me down no worries!:D but just let me be emo a little longer alright... things don't heal that fast. i'm trying my best!
as if it wasnt bad enough to be so damn shagged after last night. i had to be woken up in the most crude and annoyingg fashion. a buncha moronic middle-aged men screaming OEEEIIIII and kui chu lai! [hurry come out] for the whole DAMN STREET to hear. i'm sure the next street heard them pretty darn well too. yes yes, i thought they were sps boys and was gonna scream my lungs out at fuckers who woke me up at 7-8plus in the morn. alas, it was a wedding. thou shalt not scream YOU MOTHERFUCKERS SHUT UP on someone else's wedding.
hmmm.
proj's draining. her i don't wanna bother myself with anymore. no point me feeling all emo. i have that ache and that longing, but fuck lah. nothing seems to be happening, and i'm afraid to screw things up this time. just holding on to this... i guess i would be happy with this. but for how long more?
- :( losing it.
kc's joke of the day:
little boy: santa, i want a baby brother
santa: well, send your mom to me!
HAHAHA i dont know why that cracked me up. :D and hes damn excited. i am too. omgaah, leox outings to be confirmed but ideas are flowwinggg... zoo cum night safari, movie night cum clubbing [? um. possible] amazing race [kc you want?!?! :D] , chalet cum bbq cum dvd marathon [?] hahhahaaha anyone up for mass tanning session? HAHAHAAH
and look out for the steamboat in the hols. all i can say is, keep the days after the end of exams free!:D
mmm. looking forward to next week!:D hope things go the way its supposed to. proj-free after friday!:D then... (:
leox. fun fun fun! though turn-out was small but we still had fun. they started mentioning who's not here which made me realise, EH YAH. HE/SHE FROM LEOX. haha, we need more outings. next one coming up, ic/s: kc and me! YAY. steamboat anyone? GIANT leox steamboat. *laughs*
i love the bad boy factor. goddd, such a turn-on. *laughs*
the whole day was a huge yawn.
it doesn't hurt, AS MUCH, to have little expectations, or none at all.
and thank you so much hakim (design). hats off to you(: thanks for shedding light, and just, clarifying things with me when i'm on the brink of giving up. a short half an hour just to cure that ache that was there for weeks. smart guy. ;D
and dear gary brings out my inner bitch.
and i did the right move. by dropping her bestie a message, i can at least find out if i'm waiting in vain. thank god for that reassurance. just gotta earn trust.
now how does that sound like an easy thing.
Labels: anti-best friends, bitch club, himbos
i went from two to none. oh well, i guess it definitely uncomplicates my life. just that this wasn't what i expected as a turn-out... disappointments do happen.
i just want things to get back to normal, and if trying then still doesn't work, i'm ready to give up.
i'm feeling quite stupid actually. cos i do miss him. or i dont know if its the phonecalls from any certain someone i miss. maybe i miss being attached. how ironic. and it was only days ago that i felt detached from the status.
the confrontation today i thought was in short, futile, immature and totally moronic. but i guess some things just can't be laid off like that, and he might have been seeking his own closure to this. whatever it is, im glad things are working out. i had actually thought about staying friends with him, but its obvious. today's behaviour was a major turn-off. boo:(
think the worse is over... i'm really glad kannan didn't blow up or lose his temper, but i thought don could have handled it better. and definitely no racist comments. that was totally unneccessary. hes mixed anyway.
thanks carmen and joyce esp. you guys have been there for me throughout. all i can say is, i'm real grateful for friends like these. (:
ck, kc and even kok guan coming up to me to ask if im okay.. kok guan is like, the sweetest mr nice guy. haha, he goes around making people smile. it was totally unexpected, of all people. and he doesnt use the usual cliches. and he does have a point. we should look on the bright side of life(: i almost forgot how to do that really.
think i'm getting back into the groove of school. projs, assignments etc. mosaic submisson cum mini presentation + ob presentation tomz.. big day boyyy. and ima so proud of myself. few hours and my mask looks pretty pretty enough to eat. hope its good enough for hernie.
valentines day is coming. i dont even know if she'll hold true to her word.
you drive away, from my car crash of a heart
i shall allow myself to wallow in self-pity and be totally pessimistic for a while. oh wthhh. maybe a while longer.
i'm getting really tired. i think my recent entries are getting increasingly emo.
okay, i can't even muster enough energy to blab about the rest of my day.
blab.
gabe saved my life when i sent out an S.O.S message to practically half the bsc comm and second years i know. thank god for them and stats textbooks.
when i get scared at night, i don't know who to call anymore... :(
Labels: trouble sleeping
pretty much right now i'll just think i got my just desserts then.
i got what i deserved.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Labels: bsc room, cara, emo, mango pudding, mass dance, messed up, monster, openhouse, retribution, running scared
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again
I pretend I'm ok
But that's not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin' to do
It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I'm doin' It
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
and to think that before this, i thought it was just some emo country song in my itunes. never knew it could evoke that much feel. hearing it really breaks my heart. sigh... i feel the pain. i do.
on something much less emo-h, openhouse has been FUN, TIRING, FUN, TIRING, FUN TIRING. AHAHAHHA. omg, so much fun. yelling, hi! welcome to tp!:D or teaching loads and loads and loads [and some guys are really MORONS ] to fold paper cranes. yay! so happy. so many bowls of rice. more birds, more luck! ;)
bluetooth central boyyyy. our digi love "clique" 2hakims [2mucho himbos]+1himbo-gary+1sutrano-indo-dodo-lisa plus meeee. haha! jamming in the hydro lift. good god. and just going nuts. [gary you himbo slut! lets headbang today! HAHA]
dinner first night. thanks maybelle(: i swear you've become such a part of my life if i dont see you daily, i actually miss you. (: come find me more often lah. purple dinner came down to just the 4 of us. ming disappeared, freshies couldnt find us and left, kim and hafiz mia! and realised that our dear chee hong isnt that bad after all. sensitive new age guy!:D talked on the bus and both of us took the round trip to talk more. hmmm, i shall stop making fun of him that much. HAHA.
2nd day, erm, eventful? urban faces contest, ahh, we were rooting for laura. i thought gary was gonna droooool. and carmen if you're reading this, i really hope you're okay(: i hoped he clarified with you last night, and i hope you wouldn't let this get you down... smile my love:D
pastamania dinner with blue plus others. whoa, yisheng+gary= total bitchslutwhores. damn, they should stop [read this gary] bastard-ing me. hmph. and alvin's bro looks like his carbon copy.
IM GONNA BE LATE FOR FIRST MASS DANCE. OMGGG. okay, and proj edit. omgomgomg no time. anyone at this box on this very saturday, OMG GET UP AND GO FOR TP OPENHOUSE YO. ITS THE BEST THING.
Jam and Hop
Time: 1900pm
Venue: Triangular Garden
Bring ALLLLLL your friends to the happening school!;)
psst. you don't see np being so fun right? HOHO!XD
Labels: carmen, digi love, gary, hakims, jam and hop, openhouse, purple, sutrano, swaying, touched
i dont want my family to live in fear forever.
fuck you benny.
when i wanna just give up on everything i believed in...
commitment problems and the sad excuses i make to myself.
i guess on the surface, its a status, but i always felt detached from it.
feee-leng low flow e-mooh. sweet. where's my happy pill??
Even though sometimes you think that guys like you for only your looks, but girl, you have it all. You know when to back off, and when to keep going. You have the looks, the style, the personality. Everything. Stop trying so hard if one guy isn;t paying attention to you. Chances are you have 10 others waiting for the right time to ask you out.
Take this testThe boy next door would be your ideal guy. You guys dont need money to have fun and no need for shopping or beer. A walk to the creek and a late night phone call would be all the comfort you two need.The perfect couple.
Take this test
i have plenty plenty of stuff to do.... but i needed to de-stress. *laughs*
Labels: commitments, emo, family, quizzes, relationships, status, tests
darn.... sleepy..... zzzzz....
Labels: confused, in between., torn
holy crap. and the work starts piling up. boo. my time management skills are awfully rusty. deadlines, presentations and meetings coming up too. openhouse etc etc. just hope i'll still have some time to spare for the two loves(:
i guess i should learn how to set multiple alarms in the morning.
i pass my accounts zomgzxzzxzzxzzxzx.
*double-flips*
been going to meet bsc folks almost everyday this week alr. bizshield bizshield and bsc subcomm oei! officiating matches [so-called], and mad-emoing on the benches, it was great fun(: too bad today was cancelled due to the weather conditions. ahhhh just when i was looking forward to watching the hot soccer guys;)
SU duty maybe tomz? career fair! study! erm. study! and erm..... STUDY! *laughs*
and HAKIM SHAFDY AHKOR MATTHEWS have been comparing me to a product. too much econs and marketing my friend. oh, and did program gary post up your non-halal secret? *oops* =X! HAHA:D
the rain.. the blocks opposite... <3
and to the monster: (: god only knows how grateful i am for having you in my life.
its been long since i held a paintbrush....
my art shelf and its memories.
and i still remember those days. haha, anything we didnt understand or anything we tried out and didnt turn out well, we called ABSTRACT :D
guess we're still making excuses for ourselves.
she finally confessed. i almost breathed a sigh of relief. after the tussle and the maybe-maybenots and the no-lah-we're-just-friends. i just wished she would have had the guts earlier on. sigh...
but i'm happy with the current love... i'll try not to get emo and stuff okay? (:
so is this a double blessing or a curse...?
the two of them are such a big part of my life right now... and i'm hanging on a delicate balance between the both of them.
pretty much i agree with what hakim says. when you've broken up, you're out in the "market". haha, though the term doesn't really sound too complimentary. hoho, i'm not a piece of poultry dearies.
but thank you hakim. you're one of my more understanding friends. or actually, one of the few who actually know whats going on(: smart-ass. and you're definitely not a bastard. to hell with those who can't accept you. take their opinions and shove it up their sad asses;)
[ i said i'll credit you right? ;) ]
i think tomorrow on, i should stop looking back in anger and regret, and stop getting upset over all the mundane. it shouldn't be affecting me(: think positive my loves.
*laughs*
you think relationships are confusing?
try having, 6 damn characters in your life.
Blurry.
Everything's so blurry and everyone's so fake
And everybody's empty and everything is so messed up
Pre-occupied without you, I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you, I stumble then I crawl
You could be my someone, you could be my scene
You know that i'll protect you, from all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing, imagine where you are
There's oceans in between us, but that's not very far
Can you take it all away, can you take it all away
Well ya shoved it in my face, this pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away, can you take it all away
Well ya shoved it my face
Everyone is changing, there's no one left that's real
To make up your own ending, and let me know just how you feel
Cause I am lost without you, I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you, I stumble then I crawl
Nobody told me what you thought
Nobody told me what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn
Told you when to runaway
Nobody told you where to hide
Nobody told you what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn
Showed you when to runaway
i smiled, a little, for the afternoon.
alas, the saltiness on my face.
i just realised i had too much to say daily to have a hiatus right now. and i realised i shouldn't let what other people say affect my blogging. cos this is what i do, for me, not for them. sorry, but you can think what you want. pretty much my life's starting to fall back into place, all except for the past that keeps catching up with me. its haunting and suffocating me. and if you're gonna take everything i say literally, its gonna get very tiring. cos really, despite me wanting to take credit for those totally emo and deep phrases/words sometimes, i just ripped these from songs. so don't read too much into it. and one more thing. i know you care, but... if you really did care how i felt, you wouldn't be doing this...
gonna see you in a few hours. and im so goddamn tired. i have a whole day ahead. god have mercy and give me strength.
im pissed.
stop asking me. would you [all] rather it be a girl or a guy? either way, its my choice. alright, so lets just leave it at that.
thank you very much for respecting me.
and there's just so much i can say. this FUCKING sucks. you get what i mean? why do these things always have a way of complicating itself?
and now, do i cowardly choose the easy way out....
it was love.
and i just want more... :D and it shall wait till the ground stops rumbling.
on a really annoying note, the net's down. friendster's down. earthquake in taiwan did something to the network. and we're advised against checking it out to prevent further jamming of the system. grrr. annoyinggggg.
You're not alone