Monday, December 31, 2007
Hey Peeps!
Gonna do a rushing New yR Resolution!
1st: Happy New Yr to ALL! May All of mY friends n i be happy! enjoy urselfs!!
2nd: Able to study hard n get a cert.
3rd: Get a gd job with freaking gd pay..
4th: Hopefully Able to get a car! My toyota BB~!
5th: Able to be more happy n healthy.
6th: Make more friends..
7th: More life n aim
8th: Thanks EP for ur Help! basket u must be proud hor! thanks u in msn! even thank u in one of my resolution!
9th: To know Qi back as a friend.
10th: To be attached, hopefully with.. u know who!
Ha.. tis is my rushing new yr eve resolution! Some may not be accurate.. but i have do it in 5mins.. haha..
Happy New Yr to ALL!
PS: I didnt had a gd time on my eve.. =(
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/31/2007 10:56:00 PM|
Sunday, December 30, 2007
i am too bored. i jus have to say something.
2nd day i stayed at home the whole day..
down with fever, chest pain, bloated stomach n major 12hrs headache for the past 36 hrs.
now left bloat stomach n bloated stomach.. hoho..
did nothing today.. esp sunday..
kinda hate myself lately. for being so weak in health n down. hate tis kind of feeling.
but cant help it.
i didnt manage to slp till 6am, i didnt know why. might be my new pillow. got it changed today cause i really hate tat pillow.
each time i woke up in the nite its her its her its her! ha..
i was sure my mind wasnt clear. i keep thinking of the future with her. will it continue be like a daydreaming, dreaming thing or will it become a reality?
i need to wake up n jus pray for the future. if not all of u will also get sick by me due to ME talking abt HER every single post i am in! sigh.. sobs!
the weather was like me today. it rain. at least somehow i don need to rain it out myself.. cause the weather did it for me.
however i was worried, lighting n thunder came. she doesnt like it. she scare of it. i didnt wanna sms her to tell her to hide inside a building. cause i know she doesnt like to be nag or so, i didnt know how to show my care for her. wat failure i can be. sigh.
tml shall write my new yr resolution!
but stuff that u wont be surprised. lolz..
PS: DAMN!! i always forgot wat i wanna said!
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/30/2007 08:39:00 PM|
Friday, December 28, 2007
back!
been going out n reach home lately..
or i can say.. i slept late too.
too tired. but keep waking up in the middle of the nite,
first thought its her. even went back to the computer to check out whether she is online.
she wasnt. i still miss her deeply even though i know i gonna meet her.
anyway.. i am running down on fever n chest pain.. doc called is chest muscular skeleton pain? i cant remember.. but roughly like tat..
struggled in camp till i cant, report to MO to do ECG.. came out normal.. den he dump me at sickbay till 5pm! dot..
after tat i rushed home. rest.. didnt had the appetite.. nearly vomitted.. blahz..
ha.. hope tml i will feel better man..
I missed her.
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/28/2007 10:12:00 PM|
Monday, December 24, 2007
Merry Xmas to all!
Hope u all enjoy the holidays!
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/24/2007 11:58:00 PM|
Xmas is here!
Gonna type a quick post to challenge the time running..
my mood is damn happy today..
simple. cause i chatted with her n the mood got changed instantly.
I was too sensitive. i imagine too much. in the end i was wrong. i am glad.
however, its been very long since i did a mass sms for greetings.
i don know why i did it, but its definately cause of u.
Thanks for talking to me.
u got my first official greetings.
A Merry Xmas to u.
May u be Happy always!
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/24/2007 11:57:00 PM|
Sunday, December 23, 2007
posting after 3 days..
whao.. i didnt expect myself to write here so fast.. esp now i feel like writing after reaching home from supper with amos n joyce.. i felt bad.. cause i was shooting amos like nobody's problem when he wan tis n tat.. i have the exact feeling with him right now.. wanting something tat i don have.. although its not a must have.. jus craving.. cause it will be so much better n convenient to have one.. haiz..
i am feeling horrible. i am not sure why. i received coldness from her. not sure because she read my blog. but i felt it.
horrible. life? lost.
-Gone-
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/23/2007 11:59:00 PM|
Thursday, December 20, 2007
back...
been jus a few days i have not blog.. there were times tat i wanna blog so much.. but i don know how to express myself in words as always..
doesnt seem to care whether there are ppl who still reads my blog.. jus feel like expressing my feelings out to make myself feel better.. keeping inside me its a killer..
life have been ok for me.. but hell phyiscally tired.. i been slpin 2-3hrs a day only for the past 1-2weeks.. hanging out with friends.. msn till late.. wake up early for camp.. hell it really wear me out like nobody's business man.. i will have aches if everyone tries to "massage" me. painful!!
i kinda "lost" my job.. wanna know why? ask me.. cause its damn bloody stupid to type here n tat wasnt my purpose for tis blog post.. but i been scolded by ppl who say its not worth n i am being lost out cause tis company is being busy.. however.. i am the one who RESIGNED.. not SACK. hoho..
I am still kinda lost.. although i am happy for a day we manage to hang out thanks to one of my friend who helped me.. she also demoralise me though.. i wasnt really happy for the whole trip.. cause i have refreshes of a "rival".. who i didnt expect to like her so fast too.. but i wasnt surprise.. he have the looks.. n so on tat i felt tat i am not even able to compare with him.. many time i told EP(lets name my friend EP cause i kinda gonna name her many times), tat he is a better choice.. i really feel tat way.. he seems to be able to take care of her way better den me.. character n so on.. seems matching.. haha.. at the same time i feel tat i give up so fast.. how the hell should i give up so fast.. is it always been like me? i don like tis freaking give up character! but at the same time i doesnt know wat i should do..
like i said many times.. she is a gal whom i really like suddenly n i doesnt know why.. it totally ruled out my past, i doesnt think of my past.. i jus keep thinking of her n the future! i really don know how to tell u all my friends the feeling i am having.. EP n one more gal been demoralising me.. i really cant take it i jus have to sound out.. i need friends tat supports me.. supports as in mentally.. not always pull me down even though u all find tat i got no chance or not compatible.. i got think of all these.. but why asking me to give up so fast? cant u try to help n so on?
i know tat me n her char n lifestyle is different.. i don seem to care.. i am willing to adapt or being "trained" to listen.. wateva u called me.. i am lowing myself.. haha.. don care.. its something tat i am willing to sacrifice.
i am happy to think of her each time.. n there were times i am not sure whether its coincidence or wat.. many times we thought the same, said the same things.. tat makes me very comfy.
ahya.. i don know how to express my feelings for her. but i can tell u all. i am very serious. so pls. support me. if its fail. i kinda got my plans done.
~I missed her enchanting eyes~
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/20/2007 10:38:00 AM|
Thursday, December 13, 2007
am i really one sided?
no one is helping or motivating me..
wth.. sad.
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/13/2007 02:27:00 AM|
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
boo!
its been so long since i last post yeah..
didnt wanted to blog... but point is.. the feeling been inside myself not long but yet so strong... i don know how to explain.. it feels torturing.. ah.. seems so hard to write..
its been damn long since i really fell so deep for a gal.. tat now i cannot take it anymore.. i only seen her 5 times.. i only know her less den 1 months.. but i jus cant forget her. every sec of my mind. even when i wake up jus to use the freaking toilet.. the urge of smsing her is so strong yet i scare the sms i always send will actually irritate her instead of getting her to be interested in me..
i jus don understand how the hell i can fall for tis gal so deep.. to the extend i don care about wat other ppl gonna say.. wat i shouldnt do.. cant do.. i will jus try my best to get her stuff.. although she neva ask for anything.. i am not trying to protect her.. i am jus telling the truth..
a girl with a character, temper, mood n attitude.. but i don seem to care.. she seems perfect to me.. even though she smokes, talk or wateva! perfect! with a pair of eyes i love so much.. each time i look her in the eyes i can see reflection of myself..
ha.. i don know how to express my feelings in here either.. i am really feeling lousy.. a lousy n no confidence feeling.. how the hell would i be able.. jus be able to be close to her.. seems so far away.. the way of both our life is so different.. so much difference tat our friend keep telling me i wont be able to handle her.. n so on.. but i don care! i am more of willingly to let her handle me! my friend can tell me she is someone who needs alot of times to be accompany with her.. i don mind! i will find the time jus for her..
i don know why.. but she is someone whom i am willing to cancel all my appointments, my job offers jus to accompany her.. to sacrifice not to go fishing or buying any stuff jus to make her happy.. i am DESPERATE.. i am admitting tat i am hell of a DESPERATE.. its a DESPERATE for HER.. oh man..
wat the hell i am doing... someone.. save me.. i am on the verge of death.. i jus simply fell in love with her so deep i cant n don wanna get it away from my heart, soul n life..
willing to sacrifice everything n anything...
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/04/2007 10:03:00 PM|
